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SUNSHINE65's Recent Blog Entries

Halloween costume

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

I walked into a coffee shop on Halloween to find the woman behind the counter with a bunch of sponges pinned to her uniform.

"I'm assuming this is a costume, but just what are you supposed to be?" I asked.

The waitress responded proudly, "I'm self-absorbed."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

AZURELITE 11/1/2011 7:11PM

    emoticon

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ELLFIN3 11/1/2011 4:37PM

    Love it! Thanks for sharing!!! emoticon

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JESS0107 11/1/2011 10:40AM

    emoticon

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YELLOWDAHLIA 11/1/2011 10:16AM

    Funny!

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ALICERIEGER 11/1/2011 8:40AM

    That is a unique costume. Not everyone is that honest.

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NELLIEBLUE 11/1/2011 1:21AM

    Do you think she is self absorbed in herself or she absorb spills?

emoticon emoticon

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Try the Halloween Card Again

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Copy & Paste into your browser to see the card:

http://ak.imgag.com/imgag/product/previe
w/flash/bws8Shell.swf?ihost=http://ak.
imgag.com/imgag&brandldrPath=/product/
full/el/&cardNum=/product/full/ap/3125
133/graphic1


Happy Halloween!!!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALICERIEGER 10/31/2011 9:51AM

    Thanks for the card. A good chuckle.

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PMWALKER 10/31/2011 8:22AM

    Very cute - and it worked fine! Thanks for the card!

Happy Halloween!

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Dangerous Dihydrogen Monoxide

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted thousands of people every year. Most of these deaths are caused by accidental inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide do not end there. Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage. Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating and urination, and possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body electrolyte imbalance. For those who have become dependent, DHMO withdrawal means death.

Dihydrogen monoxide:

* is also known as hydric acid, and is the major component of acid rain.

* contributes to the "greenhouse effect."

* may cause severe burns.

* contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.

* accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.

* may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.

* has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.

CONTAMINATION IS REACHING EPIDEMIC PROPORTIONS!

Quantities of dihydrogen monoxide have been found in almost every stream, lake, and reservoir in America today. But the pollution is global, and the contaminant has even been found in Antarctic ice. In the midwest alone DHMO has caused millions of dollars of property damage.

Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:

* as an industrial solvent and coolant.

* in nuclear power plants.

* in the production of styrofoam.

* as a fire retardant.

* in many forms of cruel animal research.

* in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains contaminated by this chemical.

* as an additive in "junk-foods" and other food products.

Companies dump waste DHMO into rivers and the ocean, and nothing can be done to stop them because this practice is still legal. The impact on wildlife is extreme, and we cannot afford to ignore it any longer!

THE HORROR MUST BE STOPPED!

The American government has refused to ban the production, distribution, or use of this damaging chemical due to its "importance to the economic health of this nation." In fact, the navy and other military organizations are conducting experiments with DHMO, and designing multi-billion dollar devices to control and utilize it during warfare situations. Hundreds of military research facilities receive tons of it through a highly sophisticated underground distribution network. Many store large quantities for later use.

IT'S NOT TOO LATE!

Act NOW to prevent further contamination. Find out more about this dangerous chemical. What you don't know CAN hurt you and others throughout the world.

(Note: Dihydrogen monoxide is another way of saying H20, or just plain water)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GRANDMA624 10/30/2011 9:38AM

  Makes me think!! emoticon

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ELLFIN3 10/26/2011 2:19PM

    Very, very interesting! Makes You think!!! emoticon
emoticon

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ALICERIEGER 10/26/2011 11:43AM

    I'll never look at water in the same way again.. Love the blog.

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MRE1956 10/26/2011 10:51AM

    Good one (have heard this before) - but on a more serious note - don't get me started on the flooding mayhem that stuff can cause.....seriously, I've had enough river troubles to last a lifetime.....

Way too much rain this year!

emoticon emoticon

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Oxymorons

Sunday, October 16, 2011

- Extinct Life
- Plastic glasses
- Terribly pleased
- Computer security
- Political science
- Tight slacks
- Definite maybe
- Pretty ugly
- Rap music
- Working vacation
- Religious tolerance
- Microsoft Works
- Alone together
- Small crowd
- Business ethics
- Soft rock
- Butt Head
- Military Intelligence
- Sweet sorrow
- Rural Metro (ambulance service)
- "Now, then ..."
- Passive aggression
- Clearly misunderstood
- Peace force
- State worker
- Legally drunk
- Exact estimate
- Act naturally
- Found missing
- Resident alien
- Genuine imitation
- Airline Food
- Good grief
- Government organization
- Sanitary landfill

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PMWALKER 10/19/2011 9:17AM

    How true...very funny!

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IM4KINGDOM 10/18/2011 12:38PM

    Hilarious!!!

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ALICERIEGER 10/17/2011 10:47AM

    Thanks for sharing. There are several I never thought of but are very true.

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IDLETYME 10/17/2011 8:19AM

    Wow! Fun - Thanks!! emoticon

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NTSOHLTHNT 10/16/2011 8:17PM

    emoticon

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NETGNAL 10/16/2011 5:58PM

    Love it! I'm going to keep a copy for myself.

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How to Handle Teens

Friday, October 14, 2011

A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began.

The very next afternoon three young boys, full of youthful, after-school enthusiasm, came down his street, beating merrily on every trash can they encountered. The crashing percussion continued day after day, until finally the wise old man decided it was time to take some action.

The next afternoon, he walked out to meet the young percussionists as they banged their way down the street. Stopping them, he said, "You kids are a lot of fun. I like to see you express your exuberance like that. In fact, I used to do the same thing when I was your age. Will you do me a favor? I'll give you each a dollar if you'll promise to come around every day and do your thing."

The kids were elated and continued to do a bang-up job on the trash cans. After a few days, the old-timer greeted the kids again, but this time he had a sad smile on his face. "This recession's really putting a big dent in my income," he told them. "From now on, I'll only be able to pay you 50 cents to beat on the cans." The noisemakers were obviously displeased, but they did accept his offer and continued their afternoon ruckus. A few days later, the wily retiree approached them again as they drummed their way down the street.

"Look," he said, "I haven't received my Social Security check yet, so I'm not going to be able to give you more than 25 cents. Will that be okay?" "A lousy quarter?" the drum leader exclaimed. "If you think we're going to waste our time, beating these cans around for a quarter, you're nuts! No way, mister. We quit!" And the old man enjoyed peace.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAMNANGEL 10/14/2011 11:44AM

    I was going to suggest duct tape, but I've been informed by my legal department that is not an option.

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ELLFIN3 10/14/2011 11:33AM

    emoticon Great way to handle the situation! Thanks for sharing!! emoticon

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JESS0107 10/14/2011 10:20AM

    And that is how you do it!!!

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IDLETYME 10/14/2011 10:12AM

    Great! emoticon emoticon

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ALICERIEGER 10/14/2011 9:57AM

    What a great story. Thinking outside the box certainy pays off.

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DFROMTX 10/14/2011 8:40AM

    Enjoyed the story. emoticon

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PMWALKER 10/14/2011 8:31AM

    Too funny!

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CORINNEMOMMY 10/14/2011 6:26AM

    teenagers only? This may work with the entire population:-)

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GRANDMA624 10/14/2011 5:51AM

  emoticon

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4SASHA 10/14/2011 1:14AM

    I used to be a middle school teacher. My colleagues often wondered why, I could get students to do things that they couldn't. I told them they just weren't creative enough in their approach...now you have gone and published my secret.

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PEPIPOI 10/14/2011 1:13AM

    What a lovely story. Teenagers sure a lot to contend with. At least my daughters were good and I only got the occassional problem. Anyway your story was brilliant.

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