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Funny Business Signs

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Cocktail lounge, Norway:
"LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR."

Doctors office, Rome:
"SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

In a Nairobi restaurant:
"CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER."

On an Athi River highway: this is the main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi.
"TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE."

On a poster at Kencom:
"ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO, WE CAN HELP."

In a City restaurant:
"OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS."

A sign seen on an automatic restroom hand dryer:
"DO NOT ACTIVATE WITH WET HANDS."

In a cemetery:
"PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES."

On the menu of a Swiss restaurant:
"OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR."



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  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NTSOHLTHNT 5/25/2011 6:46PM

    That reminds me of the exit row cards on airplanes: If you can't read this card, please notify a flight attendant who will reseat you. I think I'm keeping me exit row seat, regardless. LOL.... Thanks for the laughs!

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ELLFIN3 5/20/2011 2:19PM

    Pirceless!!!!! emoticon Have a great weekend!!!

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41SUSAN14 5/20/2011 9:45AM

    :-)

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ALICERIEGER 5/20/2011 9:27AM

    Isn't language amazing! Thanks for the laugh.

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IDLETYME 5/20/2011 8:49AM

    Super!! My Friday morning laugh! Thanks emoticon

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CUINPARADISE 5/19/2011 10:39PM

    Cute and funny! Thanks for sharing these.
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Strong Hands, Better Life

Monday, May 16, 2011

I just had to laugh when I read "The YOU Docs" for today (Drs Mehmet Oz and Mike Roizen)...where it says about the one-armed push up "good luck with that!". You can get their daily article by going to:

www.arcamax.com/

"You don't have to be a boxing champ or a concert cellist (go, Yo-Yo Ma!) to need strong hands. Just imagine trying to get through a day without using your grip. How could Mehmet come to the rescue when Lisa Oz says, "Honey, can you open this?" How could Dr. Mike lift his weights or write his daily thank-yous? How long could you massage your lover's back (and maybe other parts too)?

"And there's this: Building hand strength in midlife protects you from disabilities later on and keeps you active longer. It's also critical to walking a dog, carrying groceries, opening paint, re-arranging furniture and attempting a one-armed pushup (good luck with that). Strong hands keep your life and your body running as smoothly as a new car.

"Ready to get a grip? Here's how:

"Pop bubble wrap. Popping bubbles is an easy (and addictive) way to start.

"Squeeze a ball or play with clay. Steal Rover's tennis ball and squeeze it 10 times. Or take a clump of the kids' modeling clay and start rolling, pinching and squeezing it. After several minutes, the clay and your hands should be warm and supple. (Now make something!)

"Form a few "O's." Touch your thumb to each fingertip and repeat 10 times per hand. Advance to squeezing and holding the O's for a few seconds.

"Push against a wall. Hold your hands out in front of you and press gently against a wall. Bonus: This stretch can help prevent carpal tunnel syndrome.

"Now give yourself a hand!"


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALICERIEGER 5/17/2011 11:15AM

    Thanks for another great blog. I might even master a few of those exercises.

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ELLFIN3 5/16/2011 3:57PM

    Great blog! Thanks for sharing! Enjoy your day!!!!! emoticon

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One-Arm Side Pushup

Sunday, May 15, 2011

SUNSHINE65 thinks this must be done in claymation!

www.sparkpeople.com/resource/
exercises.asp?exercise=139



  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALICERIEGER 5/16/2011 9:44AM

    You have got to be right. Maybe we need a Senior's section in our exercises.

God Bless

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ELLFIN3 5/15/2011 7:26PM

    I think you are right! The first thing that came to mind was pain!!! Enjoy your evening!!!!! emoticon

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NTSOHLTHNT 5/15/2011 5:50PM

    emoticon

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4EVERFIT011 5/15/2011 3:19PM

    emoticon
I'm with you!

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How to Stay Young

Monday, May 09, 2011

1. Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.

2. Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

3. Keep learning. Learn more about the computer, crafts, gardening, whatever. Never let the brain idle.

4. Enjoy the simple things.

5. Laugh often, long and loud. Laugh until you gasp for breath.

6. The tears happen. Endure, grieve, and move on. The only person who is with us our entire life, is ourselves. Be ALIVE while you are alive.

7. Surround yourself with what you love, whether it's family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever. Your home is your refuge.

8. Cherish your health: If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

9. Don't take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county; to a foreign country but NOT to where the guilt is.

10. Tell the people you love that you love them, at every opportunity.

AND ALWAYS REMEMBER:
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARIANTONIA2 5/15/2011 9:39AM

    Very wise comments!

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NTSOHLTHNT 5/13/2011 7:40PM

    Great advice! Thanks for sharing!

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BEATLETOT 5/10/2011 10:03AM

    I've read this before, but it's so good that I love seeing it! Thank you for posting it!

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ALICERIEGER 5/10/2011 9:33AM

    Wonderful Advice. Now if I can just remember it.

God Bless

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YIGOBUTTERFLY 5/10/2011 8:21AM

    Great ideas.

Thanks for sharing.

Jane on Guam

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NELLIEBLUE 5/9/2011 11:15PM

    What a wonderful blog, hope I can remember all those statements.


emoticon emoticon

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JSPEED4 5/9/2011 9:55PM

    Yeaaaay! I'm copying this! emoticon

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The Debt Ceiling

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

If It Really Requires "Serious Cuts" To Raise The Debt Ceiling, Let's Cut Tax Cuts For Millionaires



www.care2.com/causes/politics/blog/i
f-it-really-requires-serious-cuts-to-r
aise-the-debt-ceiling-lets-cut-tax-cut
s-for-millionaires/

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

2BEATIT1 5/8/2011 1:56AM

    I almost think you are talking about Canada instead of USA. We have the same problems. After working for the elections, I realize how much waste there is in Government forms, etc.
Our minimum wage in BC is the lowest in Canada and yet the highest cost of living.
I like your suggestions for fixing the deficit. Too bad our governments can't see it.
Jean

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JSPEED4 5/6/2011 8:19AM

    OH, and counties rule over cities! No more sovereign-cities and their police forces. Elected sherrifs can train and deputize as needed.

Counties need to look into food self-sufficieny, educating citizens about growing food--the Extension Offices already give local classes on this -- container gardening, saving seeds, apple trees and hazelnut bushes for landscaping.

Composting toilets are very effective nowadays. Make it legal for them to be in residences and include information on disposal or use of the compost.

EDIT
In Germany, whole towns generate about half of their electrical use from solar panels that people have bought and placed on or around their residences.

Potable and irrigation water needs to be tested for heavy metals, not just for bacteria--DUHHHH!!!!!!!!! emoticon

Comment edited on: 5/6/2011 8:22:02 AM

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JSPEED4 5/6/2011 7:48AM

    Here is my take on the nation's financial imbalances:

LImit the wage/salary span to 7x minimum wage; this includes all pensions/reitrement-payments, Military Generals, and National Presidents etc. The commercial market will determine who gets paid more than someone else, just as it does now. Make minimum wage a living wage (which now is at about $12 an hour) so we don't have the national disgrace of the working poor. Let teens work at under minimum wage, sort of like apprentices. Limit all bonuses to 2 per year. Neither can exceed 1/10 the annual pay of minimum wage.

Tax people with the Fair Tax, with rebates for the impoverished, and keep 30% of that in the counties, 50% in the States--and have the States manage military training and equipment using Federal guidelines--no more $2000 toilets, contractors! For a while, the Fair Tax can be 25%, but after the Fed gets thinned to normalcy (Senators can oversee the Fair Tax monies and they each might need one secretary, but no aids.) the Fair Tax needs to drop to around 20%.

Any Federal Committee is limited to 5 people. Each can study what 10 or more States have done with the issue at hand, and then they can THINK for a few days and come up with some guidelines, not hard-and-fast rules.
Do not tax businesses. Eliminate Corporations---all of those special laws around them, and require all businesses to have separate accounts from the owners. Make the finances of all businesses public knowledge.

Campaigns are limited to three months before the elections. During this time, four brochures/flyers can be sent by each candidate (Send to households, and/or city halls, county seats, postal offices, etc.) and a max of three pubic debates per candidate, two hours max time per debate. Interviews are open; whoever wants a public interview of a candidate can do one.

The FDA and AMedicalA get gutted (And a bunch of those people, and those reitred from it, get imprisoned for being too stupid to live in normal society.) for lack of good results; and people who understand alternative healing, along with minor medical stuff, can be put in. European doctors get one class on herbology and can off that as an alternative.

Europe has asked the USA, for decades, to simplify the accounting practicers to like Europe has; much less graft and embezzlement.

It is not THAT expensive to educate a child. Look at the school books used in the 1800's here. Five or six books, and the local newspapers, used over 8 years, did a better job than we do with 12 years and tons of books. The children borrow the books, so they can review the basics anytime they want to without being put into a SPECIAL class. Moms and children prepared lunches; schools have nice refrigerators now, so pertinent lunches can be kept there-- even separating those for peanut allergies and dairy and such in separate refrigerators. I prefer a room-temperature lunch. In Japan, the children clean the schools twice a weeek, using nontoxic cleaners.

I am certain that there are more issues that any competent homemaker can straighten out.

Comment edited on: 5/6/2011 8:09:39 AM

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IDLETYME 5/5/2011 9:34AM

    I agree. I realize what MY debt ceiling is and have to live within it. Can't imagine who is going to raise MY ceiling! emoticon emoticon

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CAROLYNVIL 5/4/2011 10:28PM

    I agree also.

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THESUGARFAIRY 5/4/2011 9:38PM

    You might like www.freespeech.org as well.

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ELLFIN3 5/4/2011 8:54PM

    I say let the politicians live on what I make for a year and see what they think then!!! emoticon

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SUNSHINE65 5/4/2011 7:59PM

    If you include the corporations who pay no tax and yet get subsidies! I think we at least clear the deficit. The rich get richer and the poor get poorer. That's the joyous song the rich sing as they move to enslave us. When we are all poorer, who's going to buy the stuff they make??? Think about it! emoticon

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NTSOHLTHNT 5/4/2011 7:21PM

    I'm not so sure I agree. I think that more programs need to be cut and the endless "pork" tacked on to bills by our lawmakers to cut deals needs to stop. And I think we need to stop being a nation of "entitlement." Here's an article on who really pays all of that federal income tax: http://www.newyorker.com/online/blo
gs/johncassidy/2010/04/who-pays
-federal-income-tax.html. IMHO to try to balance the federal budget and not raise the debt ceiling on the backs of the millionaires, which comprise 7.8 million people in the US--that's everyone who has at least $1 million in their bank account, sounds a bit far-fetched. By today's standards, $1M is not what it used to be 20 years ago. So, of that 7.8 million people, there are probably 5 million who have more than $1M (that's nothing to sneeze at, I'd like to have that myself), but only about 10 percent of those 5 million people are considered super-rich. Then let's take a look at who is really paying taxes (see article), and how many tax breaks the average American really gets. There are 250+ million people in the US--granted not all of them are old or young enough to pay taxes, but if you subtract those folks out, do you really think that by taking away the millionaires' tax breaks it would make up for the federal deficit? IMHO, it's a lot of rhetoric and it wouldn't even make a dent.

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TUTUNAN 5/4/2011 2:04PM

    Right on.

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ALICERIEGER 5/4/2011 10:56AM

    I agree!!!

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KESHIAG 5/4/2011 9:48AM

    amen

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