SUNSHINE65   56,189
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SUNSHINE65's Recent Blog Entries

Pain in the leg...

Sunday, June 02, 2013

An Old man went to the doctor complaining of a terrible pain in his leg. "I am afraid it's just old age", replied the doctor, "there is nothing we can do about it."

"That can't be," fumed the old man, "you don't know what you are doing."

"How can you possibly know I am wrong?" countered the doctor.

"Well it's quite obvious," the old man replied, "my other leg is fine, and it's the exact same age!"

  
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NEWKATHYNOW 6/6/2013 10:45PM

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CMRAND54 6/3/2013 10:01AM

    He has a point there.

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DOVESEYES 6/3/2013 12:29AM

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DALID414 6/2/2013 11:34PM

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CLAYARTIST 6/2/2013 10:19PM

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Chickens and Roads: You Do the Math, or Physics!

Sunday, June 02, 2013

Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Issac Newton: Chickens at rest tend to stay at rest, chickens in motion tend to cross roads.

Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.

Albert Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Oliver Stone: The question is not "Why did the chicken cross the road? But is rather, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"


The Road: Why Did the Chicken Cross it?

Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

Heisenberg: Because the chicken is moving very fast, you can either observe the chicken or you can measure its speed, but you cannot do both.

Jean Foucault: It didnít. The rotation of the earth made it appear to cross.

Galileo: To get a better look at the stars.

Ohm: There was more resistance on this side of the road.

Pascal: It was pressured to cross the road.

Volta: The other side had more potential.


Chickens, Roads, and The Crossing

Hawking: There exist numerous parallel universes in which the same chicken is in differing stages of crossing the road. Only when one of the chickens has completed crossing the road do their ave functions coallesce.

Buckminister Fuller: Because we have not yet designed and implemented true, constantly forwardly/backwardly evolving, energy-transforming living machines which will enable us to perform all functions from the informedly turbining hub of a single autonomous in-spiralling/out-radiating network of space-connected information vector transforms. Had the chicken been supplied with my Dymaxion Tensegrity Coop, it would have remained at home, un-tempted by such risky spatial-temporal translations.

Grandpa: In our days, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WOUBBIE 6/2/2013 11:16AM

    XD Buckminster Fuller!

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COLLEENROSTE 6/2/2013 5:11AM

    grandpa is very wise

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DALID414 6/2/2013 1:58AM

    I liked Freud's answer... until I read grandpas' emoticon

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DOVESEYES 6/2/2013 1:07AM

    Wonderful I love Grandpa's answer!!! emoticon

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Thumb-sucking!

Friday, May 31, 2013

A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit. Finally she tried threats, warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon." Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what you've been doing."

  
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OAKASHANDTHORN 6/1/2013 1:39AM

    Love your sense of humor! You add much to my day (mostly silly grins!)

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NAYPOOIE 5/31/2013 10:54AM

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HELEN_BRU 5/31/2013 8:25AM

    Cute

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GIA_ROSY 5/31/2013 6:21AM

    Out of the mouths of babes...... emoticon

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COLLEENROSTE 5/31/2013 5:24AM

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RISINGBLUESTAR 5/31/2013 4:49AM

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DOVESEYES 5/31/2013 2:02AM

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DALID414 5/31/2013 12:23AM

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ALICIA214 5/31/2013 12:16AM

 


Good One !! Kind of backfired didn't it.

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Thumb-sucking!

Friday, May 31, 2013

A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit. Finally she tried threats, warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon." Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what you've been doing."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GARDENCHRIS 5/31/2013 10:42AM

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Thumb-sucking!

Friday, May 31, 2013

A boy had reached four without giving up the habit of sucking his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit. Finally she tried threats, warning her son that, "If you don't stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon." Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench. The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her saying, "Uh-oh ... I know what you've been doing."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARGARITTM 5/31/2013 10:41AM

    Cute!

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