SUNSHINE65   56,269
SparkPoints
50,000-59,999 SparkPoints
 
 
SUNSHINE65's Recent Blog Entries

Late Night - you asked for them!

Monday, March 18, 2013

"The day after daylight savings time is the groggiest day of the year because of monkeying with our clocks. But the biggest waste of time about resetting your clocks is trying to line up that little hole in the clock with the nail in your wall." -David Letterman



"With Washington in the middle of a budget crisis, the White House is facing criticism for spending $250,000 a year on calligraphy. You can tell you're spending way too much money on calligraphy when you spend ANY money on calligraphy." -Jimmy Fallon



"A Washington state mother is accused of letting her 22-month-old toddler smoke marijuana. When reached for comment the toddler said, 'Hey, man, everybody chill out!'" -Conan O'Brien

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BARCLE 3/18/2013 6:53PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PROVERBS31JULIA 3/18/2013 1:44PM

    Whaaaaa I resemble remark #2 - how come I'm not getting any of the $$ for Calligraphy?! I love to do Calligraphy but the Feds don't ask me to help out?!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DALID414 3/18/2013 1:19PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Newly Issued Alcohol Warnings

Friday, March 15, 2013

The American Board of Health has proposed that warning signs be placed on all alcohol bottles to tip off drinkers about the possible peril of drinking a pint or two of any alcoholic beverage.

1. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to wake up with a breath that could knock a buzzard off a reeking dead animal that is one hundred yards away.

2. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot.

3. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends want to assault you

4. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish.

5. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the boss what you really think of him.

6. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burn on the forehead.

7. WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really, really big guy named Psycho Bob.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

2BDYNAMIC 3/15/2013 11:45PM

    Sad ........... But true .................. (funny too!) ..............
(I'm sure many will take heed!) ............... emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GARDENCHRIS 3/15/2013 7:08AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOVESEYES 3/15/2013 1:36AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DALID414 3/15/2013 12:54AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Not a funny blog

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Ok, Just been through a tooth drama. Well it's a drama for me, anyway. My nightmare is of my teeth breaking up and spitting them out. Three weeks ago a front tooth (a #10 if you know the numbers of the teeth) which was crowned (2nd time) broke and was hanging and wagging back and forth. Freaked me out! Saw my dentist, said there was nothing that could be done and I'd have to have an implant. Had those before, no big deal, right? Well, I opted to pay $620 dollars to sleep through it. And am I glad I did! Dig out the root, do bone grafts, and implant the titanium screw. Took an hour, longer than they thought. Sooo glad I was asleep. Trekked over to the dentist's and got an impression for a $700 cosmetic flipper since it was a front tooth and I have a front desk job. Got that a few days later and it works well. Can't eat with it, but I can take it out and eat fine. Thanks for listening! Love, Gayle

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROSALIEESTHER 3/17/2013 8:39AM

    Poor Baby! What a nightmare indeed. Do glad it all turned out well. Those implants are there for the long haul. So no more bad dreams about that tooth.

Report Inappropriate Comment
EVER-HOPEFUL 3/15/2013 2:51AM

    you are braver that me i have an obsolute phobia of dentist and haven´t been in donkey´s years lol. emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOVESEYES 3/15/2013 1:36AM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DALID414 3/15/2013 12:43AM

    Wow! And to think I've been delaying my cleaning! I'll schedule my appointment tomorrow!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DIET_FRIEND 3/14/2013 11:14PM

    Dentistry is so expensive. My dad went to Costa Rica and got all his teeth ( i think) root canaled and capped. It cost 25,000 to do and required 2 trips to costa rica. I wish I could pull that off.

Report Inappropriate Comment


Driven to Distraction

Thursday, March 14, 2013

- Only in America can a pizza guy get to your door faster than an ambulance.

- Why do slow-down and slow-up mean the same thing?

- Why are wise man and wise guy opposites?

- Why is it that when stuff goes on a truck it's called a shipment and on a boat it's called cargo?

- Why do we drive in a parkway and park in a driveway?

- Why do we press harder on things when we know the batteries are dead?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NAYPOOIE 3/14/2013 11:57AM

    LOL

Report Inappropriate Comment
WOUBBIE 3/14/2013 10:13AM

    :)

Glad you post these! I'll go back through your old blogs for laughs while I'm waiting for Stewart and Colbert to come back from their breaks!

Report Inappropriate Comment
GARDENCHRIS 3/14/2013 7:11AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DOVESEYES 3/14/2013 6:45AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DALID414 3/14/2013 12:51AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ZRIE014 3/14/2013 12:46AM

  have a good day

Report Inappropriate Comment


Late Night Funnies

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Late Night Funny #1

A major snowstorm has hit the East Coast. In Washington, D.C., everything ground to a halt – and then the snowstorm hit. -Conan O'Brien


Late Night Funny #2

Due to budget cuts, all tours of the White House have been canceled indefinitely. When he heard, Joe Biden said, 'Now I'll never see it.' -Conan O'Brien


Late Night Funny #3

Today Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell released a Harlem Shake video. So just when you think a trend is dead, it's made cool again by Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell. -Conan O'Brien


Late Night Funny #4

The people of Venezuela aren't sure who'll replace Hugo Chavez. CBS suggested Ashton Kutcher. -Craig Ferguson

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BOPPY_ 3/14/2013 1:28AM

    #4 gets my vote. emoticon

Lee emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KARRENLYNN 3/14/2013 12:18AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DALID414 3/14/2013 12:17AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 147 148 149 150 151 152 153 154 155 156 157 158 159 160 161 162 163 164 165 166 167 168 169 170 171 172 173 174 175 176 177 178 179 180 181 182 183 184 185 186 187 188 189 190 191 192 193 194 195 196 197 198 199 200 201 202 203 204 205 206 207 208 209 210 211 212 213 214 215 216 217 218 219 220 221 222 223 224 225 226 227 228 229 230 231 232 233 234 235 236 237 238 239 240 241 242 243 244 245 246 247 248 249 250 251 252 253 254 255 256 Last Page