SUNSHINE65   55,222
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SUNSHINE65's Recent Blog Entries

BEAR HUNTING...

Friday, March 08, 2013

Ralph and Norris went bear hunting in Montana. While Ralph stayed in the cabin, Norris went out looking for a bear. He soon found a huge bear, shot at it but only wounded it. The enraged bear charged toward him. His rifle jammed, so he dropped it and started running for the cabin as fast as he could.

Now Norris was pretty fleet of foot, but the bear was just a little faster and gained on him with every step. Just as Norris reached the open cabin door, he tripped and fell flat. Too close behind to stop, the bear tripped over him and went rolling into the cabin.

Norris man jumped up, closed the cabin door and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go and get another!"

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GARDENQE2 3/11/2013 2:39PM

    emoticon
The old hunters' advice....If you get chased by a bear, you don't have to be able to outrun him, just be able to outrun your companion! emoticon

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DALID414 3/8/2013 10:38PM

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Late Night Funnies

Friday, March 08, 2013

"Researchers are developing a stay-sober pill that will prevent you from getting drunk off of alcohol. It's perfect for the drinker who wants all the calories of alcohol but none of the fun." -Conan O'Brien

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"These days, teachers have it rough. Kids can be hyperactive, disobedient, and obnoxious. It must feel like being locked in a room of drunk midgets." -Craig Ferguson

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"A new study found that most people cant go 10 minutes without lying. But since the study took 20 minutes nobody knows what to believe." -Jimmy Fallon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DALID414 3/8/2013 10:34PM

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3016DEBRA 3/8/2013 12:24PM

  Love the first one! emoticon

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HHB4181 3/8/2013 9:24AM

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HPSANDDOLLAR 3/8/2013 7:57AM

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DOVESEYES 3/8/2013 6:30AM

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GARDENCHRIS 3/8/2013 5:51AM

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RONNIEHUEY 3/8/2013 4:37AM

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KWEEKWEK 3/8/2013 3:23AM

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RITZIBROWN 3/8/2013 2:42AM

    emoticon emoticon

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BOPPY_ 3/8/2013 2:14AM

    Thanks for the posts.

They only make me remember how much I miss Johnny Carson.

The "new crop" although often funny, just don't do it for me.

signed,

stodgy old guy emoticon emoticon

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Deep Thoughts about Pigs & Sheep

Wednesday, March 06, 2013

- Do you think sheep know when you're pulling the wool over their eyes?

- Does the person who inventories sheep often fall asleep on the job?

- If a pig is sold to the pawn shop is it then called a ham-hock?

- If we make sweaters out of a sheep's hair, what do the sheep use to make sweaters?

- If you can't make a silk purse from a sow's ear what can you make with it?

- If you pushed a pig down a hill would he be a sausage roll?

- What do pigs say when they don't want to do something? Would it be 'Yea when humans fly'?

- What do sheep count when they can't get to sleep?

- Why can't pigs look up into the sky?

- Why do pigs have curly tails?

- Why do we call them guinea pigs when they are neither from Guinea nor are they pigs?

- Why don't sheep shrink when it rains?

- Why is it that only pigs and humans can get sunburn?

- Why is it that the first thing we try to do after killing a pig is to cure it?

- Would a small pig be called a hamlet?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOMCHEERS 3/8/2013 9:41PM

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GARDENCHRIS 3/8/2013 5:52AM

    okay!

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CAMSEDGE 3/6/2013 8:03PM

    emoticon

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63KEEPONGOING 3/6/2013 3:14PM

  So clever. Very enjoyable.

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CINDYSDAY 3/6/2013 12:08PM

    tooo funny!

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BECKYSRN 3/6/2013 9:30AM

    emoticon
Does the wolf in sheep's clothing buy it off the rack of lamb? Just wondering...
Thanks for sharing.

Comment edited on: 3/6/2013 9:31:05 AM

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MOONGLOWSNANA 3/6/2013 8:36AM

  Oink Oink! Baaa! emoticon

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DOVESEYES 3/6/2013 8:25AM

    That's the lamb and pork of it (long and short) ....hey I tried!!! emoticon

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WOUBBIE 3/6/2013 8:22AM

    Hmmm, Gayle, I'm seeing a "pig" theme this week:

Tuesday, March 05, 2013
"A farmer in Oregon was eaten by his pigs. The pigs ate the farmer. But in the overall race, humans are still way ahead." -Jay Leno

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SLACHETKA103145 3/6/2013 5:26AM

    Thank you emoticon emoticon emoticon but I liked the thoughts too!

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NANA2PRINCESSES 3/6/2013 5:14AM

    emoticon
Thanks for posting.

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LYNNWILK2 3/6/2013 5:12AM

    emoticon emoticon

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COLLEENROSTE 3/6/2013 3:48AM

    emoticon so much to ponder, so much to learn

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DALID414 3/6/2013 2:04AM

    emoticon

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ALICIA214 3/6/2013 1:34AM

 


Deep thoughts indeed and worth pondering over.!!!

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EMERGENCY PREPAREDNESS

Tuesday, March 05, 2013

A government warning was recently issued that anyone traveling in icy or blizzard conditions should take:

- Shovel, blankets or sleeping bag
- Extra clothing including scarf, hat and gloves
- 24 hours supply of food and drink
- De-icer
- 5 lbs of rock salt
- flashlight with spare batteries
- Road flares and reflective triangles
- Tow rope
- 5 gallon gas can
- First aid kit
- Jump cables

I felt like a complete idiot on the bus this morning.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DS9KIE 3/8/2013 8:12PM

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NAYPOOIE 3/6/2013 1:00PM

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CINDYSDAY 3/5/2013 1:43PM

    lol

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DALID414 3/5/2013 11:01AM

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KJDINSC 3/5/2013 8:37AM

    So funny!

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GARDENCHRIS 3/5/2013 7:00AM

    I can see why! LOLOLOL

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EVER-HOPEFUL 3/5/2013 5:51AM

    well you would have to ride in the bus because by the time you packed all that for a family of 5 there would be no room left to sit in the car,lol

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DOVESEYES 3/5/2013 5:36AM

    emoticon emoticon

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HANDYV 3/5/2013 5:11AM

    emoticon Well when you drive yourself you will be ready.

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AZURELITE 3/5/2013 5:09AM

    emoticon

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ZRIE014 3/5/2013 12:46AM

  you need to be prepared

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LATE NIGHT FUNNIES

Tuesday, March 05, 2013

"A farmer in Oregon was eaten by his pigs. The pigs ate the farmer. But in the overall race, humans are still way ahead." -Jay Leno

***

"You know what Portland has lot of? Microbreweries. I think they are like regular breweries, but only serve midgets." -Craig Ferguson

***

"There's a new technique that lets doctors perform kidney transplants in 45 minutes. Because when you're getting a kidney transplant, your main concern is always, 'Can you do it in less than an hour?'" -Jimmy Fallon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DALID414 3/5/2013 11:02AM

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WOUBBIE 3/5/2013 8:24AM

    @ZRIE014 That's a joke, right? Right?

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Or not?

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PANIK257 3/5/2013 3:40AM

    lol. I love the last one.

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ZRIE014 3/5/2013 12:50AM

  you better look out what they take

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