SUNSHINE65   60,086
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SUNSHINE65's Recent Blog Entries

Hope he used the new strawberry flavored shoe polish!

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

A man standing in line at a check out counter of a grocery store was very surprised when a very attractive woman behind him said, "Hello!" Her face was beaming.

He gave her that "who are you look," and couldn't remember ever having seen her before. Then, noticing his look, she figured she had made a mistake and apologized.

"Look," she said "I'm really sorry but when I first saw you, I thought you were the father of one of my children," and walked out of the store.

The guy was dumbfounded and thought to himself, "What is the world coming to? Here is an attractive woman who can't keep track of who fathers her children!"

Then he got a little panicky. "I don't remember her," he thought, but MAYBE..during one of the fraternity parties he had been to when he was in college, perhaps he did father her child! He ran from the store and caught her in the parking lot and asked, "Are you the girl I met at a party in college and then we had a little too much to drink and spent the night together but I never called you again afterward?"

"No", she said with a horrified look on her face. "I'm your son's Sunday School teacher."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAMNANGEL 10/25/2012 12:39AM

    Always a classic!

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MISSDAISY23 10/24/2012 2:57PM

    I heard this one before and I still love it! Thanks for the laugh! emoticon


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CARRAND 10/24/2012 12:11PM

    emoticon

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AQUAGIRL08 10/24/2012 6:09AM

    emoticon

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KALIOPPE 10/24/2012 4:55AM

    emoticon

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SSUSMITA 10/24/2012 1:31AM

    Its kind of pathetic! emoticon but yet hilarious!!

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123ELAINE456 10/24/2012 12:41AM

  That was Hilarious. Thank You. God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Week.

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DALID414 10/24/2012 12:32AM

    emoticon

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FIT4MEIN2013 10/24/2012 12:25AM

    emoticon So funny!

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NANCYRUBIO 10/23/2012 11:28PM

    emoticon I spilt on myself laughing!

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COCK-ROBIN 10/23/2012 11:24PM

    emoticon That was hilarious! Thank you.

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Late Night Funnies

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

"Health experts have named Mississippi the fattest state in the Union. The state bird of Mississippi? The fried chicken." -Jay Leno

"This week in New Zealand, a man who lost his wedding ring in the ocean found it in the water over a year later. The man says the most amazing thing about the story is that his wife fell for it." -Conan O'Brien

"Philadelphia has a new plan to ticket pedestrians who text without looking up while they walk. As opposed to the previous punishment: lamp posts." -Jimmy Fallon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TWEETYKC00 10/24/2012 4:46AM

    cute!

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123ELAINE456 10/24/2012 12:45AM

  Thank You for the Jokes. God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Week.

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DALID414 10/24/2012 12:31AM

    emoticon

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BEAUTIFUL_REINA 10/24/2012 12:03AM

    lol

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SHARON10002 10/23/2012 11:29PM

    Loved the lamp post joke! Thanks for the laughs! emoticon

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NANCYRUBIO 10/23/2012 11:29PM

    Thanks again!!

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PJBONARRIGO 10/23/2012 11:21PM

    Thanks for posting. I really loved the lamp post punishment LOL

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Mitt's Binder Full of Women

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NEWKATHYNOW 10/25/2012 11:49PM

    emoticon

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BABY_GIRL69 10/24/2012 4:16PM

    emoticon I guess we're built binder tough....lol

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READYRACHEL 10/24/2012 9:46AM

    emoticon Nice.

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MISSFORTE 10/24/2012 8:59AM

    emoticon

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123ELAINE456 10/24/2012 12:47AM

  Great. God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Week.

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ELSCO55 10/23/2012 11:03PM

    emoticon

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DALID414 10/23/2012 10:58PM

    emoticon

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Pesky Telemarketer

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

The phone rang as I was sitting down to my anticipated evening meal and, as I answered, I was greeted with, "Is this Wilhiam Wagenhoss?"

This didn't sound anything like my name, so I asked, "Who is calling?"

The telemarketer said he was with The Rubberband-Powered Freezer Company or something like that and then I asked him if he knew Wilhiam personally and why was he was calling this number. I then said, off to the side, "Get really good pictures of the body and all the blood."

I then turned back to the phone and advised the caller that he had entered a murder scene and must stay on the line because we had already traced this call and he would be receiving a summons to appear in the local courthouse to testify in this murder case.

I then questioned the caller at great length as to his name, address, phone number at home, at work, who he worked for, how he knew the dead guy and could he prove where he had been about one hour before he made this call. The telemarketer was getting very concerned and his answers were given in a shaky voice.

Then I proceeded to tell him that we had located his position at his work place and the police were entering the building to take him into custody. At that point, I heard the phone fall and the scurrying of his running away.

My wife asked me, as I returned to the table, why I had tears streaming down my face and so help me, I couldn't tell her for about fifteen minutes.

My meal was cold, but oh-so-very enjoyable.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COACHPENNY 10/24/2012 3:01PM

    I would LOVE to do that!

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MISSDAISY23 10/24/2012 3:00PM

    emoticon

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DALID414 10/23/2012 9:53PM

    emoticon

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HELEN_BRU 10/23/2012 9:18PM

    emoticon

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123ELAINE456 10/23/2012 8:52PM

  Very Funny!!! Love It!!! God Bless You and Have a Wonderful Week. Enjoy You Day. Take Care.

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ALICERIEGER 10/23/2012 10:12AM

    Love it!

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COCK-ROBIN 10/23/2012 9:35AM

    Oh, this is HILARIOUS! emoticon Thanks for sharing it.

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MRFUZZ 10/23/2012 9:18AM

    I wonder if that would get rid of them. They are pesky and multiply like roaches!

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LINDA7668 10/23/2012 6:09AM

    Too Funny!!!!!

After my mom passed, a telemarketer called for her. My dad told them she didn't live there anymore. They asked for a number where she could be reached. He muttered something about finding the cemetary's phone number. The telemarketer hung up on him. lol

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HOTPINKCAMARO49 10/23/2012 3:35AM

  TOO FUNNY!!!! Thanks for sharing!

To all who have received Telemarketing callers - THANK YOU!

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Late Night Funny #2

Monday, October 22, 2012

On the subject of equal pay for women, he said that when he was filling cabinet positions as governor of Massachusetts, he went out of his way to make sure he hired women. He said he had ‘binders full of women’, which is a little creepy. Binders full of women is something they’d find in a serial killer’s basement at the end of Law & Order SVU.

Jimmy Kimmel

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

COACHPENNY 10/23/2012 12:41AM

    Oh, not a good picture in my head right now!

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CARRAND 10/22/2012 11:39PM

    He's pretty creepy all right.

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BALLOUZOO 10/22/2012 10:06PM

    So true~very creepy!

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