SUNSHINE65   50,020
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SUNSHINE65's Recent Blog Entries

Tickle Me Elmo

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

TOO FUNNY NOT TO SHARE….
 
  There is a factory in Northern Minnesota which makes the Tickle Me Elmo toys. The toy laughs when you tickle it under the arms.

Well, Lena is hired at The Tickle Me Elmo factory and she reports for her first day promptly at 8:00 am.

The next day at 8:45 am there is a knock at the Personnel Manager's door. The Foreman throws open the door and begins to rant about the new Employee. He complains that she is incredibly slow and the whole line is backing up, putting the entire production line behind schedule. The Personnel Manager decides he should see this for himself, so the 2 men march down to the factory floor. When they get there the line is so backed up that there are Tickle Me Elmo's all over the factory floor and they're really beginning to pile up. At the end of the line stands Lena surrounded by mountains of
Tickle Me Elmo's. She has a roll of plush Red fabric and a huge
bag of small marbles. The 2 men watch in amazement as she cuts a little piece of fabric, wraps it around two marbles and begins to carefully sew the little package between Elmo's legs.

The Personnel Manager bursts into laughter. After several minutes of hysterics he pulls himself together and approaches Lena. 'I'm sorry,' he says to her, barely able to keep a straight face, 'but I
think you misunderstood the instructions I gave you yesterday...'

'Your job is to give Elmo two test tickles.'


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MISSDAISY23 9/12/2012 3:34PM

    emoticon

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COACHPENNY 9/12/2012 2:20PM

    Tickle you FUNNY!

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ALICERIEGER 9/12/2012 8:17AM

    Aaw--The art of conversation!!

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123ELAINE456 9/11/2012 11:56PM

  Awesome!!!

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HEALTHYAGER 9/11/2012 8:46PM

    HA! Brightened my day reading that!

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NAYPOOIE 9/11/2012 7:23PM

    LOL

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ELLFIN3 9/11/2012 4:50PM

    emoticon Love it!! Thanks for the giggles!! ((HUGS))

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JATHUENER 9/11/2012 4:37PM

    LOL that is funny

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Police Comments were taken from police car videos

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

The following 15 Police Comments were taken from actual police car videos around the country. Count down to #1...

#15 "Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they're new. They'll stretch after you wear them a while."

# 14 "If you take your hands off the car, I'll make your birth certificate a worthless document."

#13 "If you run, you'll only go to jail tired."

#12 "Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that's the
speed of the bullet that'll be chasing you."

#11 "You don't know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can
write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?"

#10 "Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don't think
it will help. Oh, did I mention that I'm the shift supervisor?"

#9 "Warning! You want a warning? O. K., I'm warning you not to do that
again or I'll give you another ticket."

#8 "The answer to this last question will determine whether you are

drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?"

#7 "Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go
to ride on rides, eat cotton candy, and corn dogs and step in monkey poo. "

#6 "Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven."

#5 "In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC."

#4 "How big were those 'Just two beers' you say you had?"

#3 "No sir, we don't have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we're allowed to write as many tickets as we can."

#2 "I'm glad to hear that chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend

of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail."

The envelope please.....................

AND THE WINNER IS ...

#1 "You didn't think we give pretty women tickets? You're right, we don't. Sign here."

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MISSDAISY23 9/12/2012 3:37PM

    emoticon

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ALICERIEGER 9/12/2012 8:13AM

    Great

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MI-ELLKAYBEE 9/12/2012 1:42AM

    emoticon Love your blogs!

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BALLOUZOO 9/11/2012 9:23PM

    Thank you for the funnies :)

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LADYJAKE1 9/11/2012 8:52PM

    My daughter is her 9th week at the police academy, I will show her this thread.

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AQUAGIRL08 9/11/2012 6:12PM

    Thanks for the laugh!!!!

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BARCLE 9/11/2012 3:53PM

    These are classic - love 'em emoticon

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COACHPENNY 9/11/2012 3:08PM

    Oh man...these are priceless. Yes, they are bad but, I wouldn't want to be a cop. They have to balance the macho (even the women cops) with enforcement and fairness.

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BICKEY11 9/11/2012 2:27PM

    emoticon

Comment edited on: 9/11/2012 2:29:00 PM

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BICKEY11 9/11/2012 2:27PM

    thank god i'm pretty!

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MSLZZY 9/11/2012 2:08PM

    emoticon

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PICKIE98 9/11/2012 2:07PM

    My dad was a police officer,, I heard a few of these, but they are all funny! I like the toaster oven one,, wish it was true!!

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Job creation bush > obama

Monday, September 10, 2012



or go to:

https://s3.amazonaws.com/obama.3cdn.
net/31ef3f9069209f2b69_h81mvyju7.jpg

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MYREALANA 9/12/2012 3:50PM

    Wow, is there some king of tag-team mailing list for the people who keep coming to your blog to tell you what you can and can't write, Sunshine?

I congratulate you on your tolerance. I would just delete those comments from my personal blog if they wrote to me.

You are a more tolerant woman than I, and I salute you.
emoticon

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COACHPENNY 9/12/2012 2:19PM

    I noticed someone here bemoaning the lack of blogs that favor Romney......telling isn't it?



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IDLETYME 9/11/2012 8:41PM

    No Comment!

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ROSALIEESTHER 9/11/2012 6:03PM

    In case anyone cares to know, there are political teams here on sparkpeople The blogs are our own personal opinions and we have the right to post anything that is on our minds.

The election is on most minds these days. Since the Republicans consistently spout the lie that Obama has killed jobs, it is important to learn the truth.

I am grateful to Sunshine for posting valuable information - truth!

Actually, Jill, if you look at the truth, Obama has spent less in his four years than any other president dating back to Reagan. Please check your facts. If they come from Faux News, well you know, they aren't facts, they're faux.

Go Sunshine!

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ANOTHER_NEWDAWN 9/11/2012 1:59PM

    This may be a health and fitness site, but people post about all sorts of things, and politics are one of them. Besides, I think that the health and fitness of the Nation is very important as well. That's why we need 4 More Years!!!!!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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AANGEL3 9/11/2012 11:41AM

    I've been posting stuff, or rather sharing, stuff on my Facebook page and I got a lot of neg feed back. But you know what? It's MY Facebook page...just as this is YOUR blog! So post away my friend! BTW...I'm in the Obama camp!

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MISSDAISY23 9/11/2012 11:40AM

    Everyone should be entitled to their own opinion. Everyone should also be entitled to blog whatever they like here. I am pretty sure I read this here on Spark People. emoticon

I hope Obama gets re-elected as our president.

Comment edited on: 9/11/2012 11:50:22 AM

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ALICERIEGER 9/11/2012 8:47AM

    I find it helpful to see different opinions. You favor Obama. I wish I could see a blog by someone who favors Romney.

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DIET_FRIEND 9/11/2012 8:29AM

    I've seen this on FaceBook. When I post stuff like this there, I get my share of negative feedback. People don't have to read your blog if they don't like political opinions.

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COACHPENNY 9/11/2012 2:38AM

   
It's your personal blog Sunshine....do with it what you like. I happen to like your point of view but, if I didn't I wouldn't be so immature to think that my negative opinion should sway you to blog otherwise.

Chart or not........having done my homework.......I'm voting to re-elect President Obama.

NEWS FLASH....Spark is a social network and there political blogs and teams and threads EVERYWHERE on this site.

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J-UNIT 9/10/2012 11:33PM

    No matter my opinion on this chart, I do not think it belongs on a health/fitness site. There is a place for politics and here it does not belong.

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JILLITA55 9/10/2012 11:33PM

    Obama has also spent more money than any other President. Another 4 years we will be in the poor house.

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READE2MOVE2012 9/10/2012 11:30PM

  Everyone should know that Obama has created more jobs than Bush did in his eight years.

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Small Business report Bush Years > Obama years

Monday, September 10, 2012



or go to:

www.adp.com/media/press-releases/201
2-press-releases/~/media/Images/NER/ne
r-0512-table2.ashx

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ROSALIEESTHER 9/12/2012 6:00AM

    But so much did in fact change with Obama. Just look at the graph?

These posts are so helpful Sunshine! Thank you.

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AANGEL3 9/11/2012 11:43AM

    Most of the power in our Gov is NOT in the White House..but int the House and Sen. The Pres can only do so much with those two bodies and when one party stonewalls everything just because they don't like the Pres..well..not a lot gets done.

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SUNSHINE65 9/10/2012 11:41PM

    I see significant changes after Obama got in...and this with absolutely no cooperation from the right!

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NANCYRUBIO 9/10/2012 11:29PM

    Interesting-they all say great things until they get into office and then nothing changes

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Ban Life Jackets!!!!

Monday, September 10, 2012



If you can't read this copy and paste:

www.neatorama.com/2012/09/08/We-Shou
ld-Ban-Life-Jackets-Other-Flotation-De
vices/

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NAYPOOIE 9/11/2012 7:25PM

    Yeah, sounds kind of familiar.

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BARCLE 9/11/2012 3:54PM

    emoticon

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ANOTHER_NEWDAWN 9/11/2012 1:53PM

    emoticon

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ALICERIEGER 9/11/2012 8:51AM

    Where did I hear this logic before?

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