Friday, May 03, 2013
I'd say this has been a serendipitous week for me. One of those 'everything is coming together ones', and, after such incredible support and attention from the 'At Goal and Maintaining Team' it seems only right to follow on the progress of those ninja antics in my mind!
For many years I've said that I have wanted to further my studies and get a Phd. Although I've applied for a few programmes, I've never had any luck with them.
At the beginning of this year, my husband and I decided it was time to reach a little bit harder for our dreams. To the extent that we concluded it was time to reduce our expenses, so that we could reduce how much we needed to earn, so that we could concentrate on living healthier, more fulfilling lives.
Not long after this discussion, we were given an opportunity to live rent-free in a small house along the coast of Northern Ireland. We could move there as soon as our commitments in London were completed. As the discussion continued, my husband's father suggested I approach the local university about studying with them. I did this. It turned out there was a conference coming up at the University at a time when we were already planning on visiting the country so, I went along to it, learned a lot and met my potential supervisor. She encouraged me to apply for a place.
What followed was a little terrifying as I had to resign from my job before being accepted on the programme. But, faith being what it is, and with my husband's encouragement, I went through with it. That was two weeks ago.
This week I got a glowing performance management assessment from boss, which was then followed by an e-mail from Tina asking if my 'negative thoughts' blog could be featured by the 'At Goal and Maintenance' team. Both were such affirmations for me of all the hard work that has gone into my professional life and my health. What has followed has been so many positive and encouraging comments from spark members, that today, I truly felt at peace with life and with whatever the future holds.
About an hour ago I found out that my Phd proposal has been accepted.
Another step towards another dream that I was beginning to feel would be impossible to achieve. I know it will be a complete change in our lives, but it feels like the time is right for it.
So, let's keep at it! One negative thought at a time......
Sunday, April 28, 2013
Jogging is a journey. Truly.
My injury in December meant I needed to cut back quite drastically and then once again build myself up slowly to the 10km distance. Time has taught me that I have to take it slowly after an injury. Time has also taught me that injuries happen and will keep on happening BUT recovery happens too.
I've been back at the 10km distance for three weeks now, and, yesterday began increasing my distance to 11km as I have signed myself up for my first 1/2 marathon in October. I'm excited as my pace is good, the weather is a little warmer, I'm running pain free, and I'm a little bit wiser than before.
Every 'body' is so unique, and part of training is learning what your body needs. I now know that I need at least two runs a week to stay injury free. One short, one long. If I don't do the short run, the long run becomes quite hard, and, can result in injury. Ideally three runs a week is good, but I'll be honest, I don't always fit it in. I do walk at least half an hour every day, though, and I've learned that that is just as important for me.
At the moment I'm keeping my build up to the half marathon quite simple. The first step was getting to 10km again. Now I'm there I'll increase my distance at about 10% every two weeks and become more diligent about strength training. I do have a training plan somewhere, which I'll read and then adapt to what I know about my own body.
Maintaining exercise really is possible. Even after injuries. One just needs to be patient. Because I'm running my beloved 10km again and I'm loving every minute of it!
Tuesday, April 02, 2013
Around this time last year I started buying cute little Spring dresses that were a size that I hadn't ever imagined would fit me. I was nervous about these purchases, mainly because I still wasn't feeling skinny and was so nervous I'd just end up putting all the weight back on again, and these dresses would end up staring at me in the wardrobe reminding me of the few minutes in my life when I was thin.
Well, anyway, it turns out that I was wrong. I've been at a fairly stable weight for a year now (about 117 - 120lbs) and today, with Spring shining so brightly through my window, I dared to see what those dresses looked like on me.
The answer: Better!!
How wonderful is that? Not so much that the dresses still fit me, but that I've managed to prove that inner monster of a voice wrong.
Sometimes I feel like maintaining my weight is turning me into a Warrior Princess when it comes to dealing with inner negativity. I can almost feel this Warrior karate chop those voices down as I prove to myself that I can be and do things these voices were telling me were simply impossible. It is both liberating and terrifying at the same time. Liberating because I believe in myself more and more everyday, terrifying, because I'm starting to realise that it is so much more possible to achieve my dreams than I ever thought. It just takes a little bit of courage each day, and a willingness to prove those inner negative voices wrong - one karate chop at a time!!
Friday, March 08, 2013
Yes, tracking my food intake.
When my head is so full of if's and but's and, as a quote I recently read, my greatest judge is living right inside me, the best weapon is to track.
Tracking makes eating objective rather than subjective. It takes food away from the emotional monster and turns it into a simple game of numbers.
The monsters says 'you're too fat', but the numbers show me I've eating within my range.
The monsters say, 'go on, have another piece of cake, you'll feel better', but the numbers show that I've eaten all I need to eat today and it's time to stop.
The monsters say, 'you have no control', the numbers show me that I do.
Then, the monsters try their most powerful attack 'tracking is way too difficult. Don't bother with it today'.......
When I hear that in my head, then I know I'm winning the battle. So, I sit down and I track my food. And, when I do that, those monsters start to lose their power, and I become just a little bit stronger than I was before.
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