Tuesday, July 17, 2012
where for some unexplainable reason I seem to want to burst into tears all the time! I can easily trace back this high state of emotion to a very stressful last few days, so I know where it's coming from and I know that it will all pass soon, but sitting in the midst of it is still hard.
At lunch, I went and got myself a cappucino and a selection of four cookies from a nearby bakery. I got them, enjoyed them, and immediately felt better. As I was aware that I needed to treat myself kindly, I gave myself permission to eat whatever I wanted. Usually, on a Tuesday I have a cappucino and a treat in the afternoon. I was perfectly prepared to give myself 'double', but when the time came, I found it wasn't what I really wanted at all. The cookies and cappucino earlier had satisfied me enough.
On my way home I knew that the next step to 'getting my head right again' would be a jog. In fact, I knew that I needed to jog. It would probably bring me back into a rational state of mind. It seems I go jogging when I'm unhappy now......
After my jog I got home and had another listen to myself - I needed a bubble bath and a cup of Jasmine white tea. I had the tea, I needed to go to the corner store to get the bubble bath. Off I went. Entered the corner store, got the bubble bath, thought about getting my favourite chocolate (but they didn't have it), and so I left. Yes, you read correctly. I left the corner store without chocolate......
Got home, ran the bath, lit the candle, put some music on and gave myself some time to unwind.......with one vital ingredient missing: chocolate
Now, I don't quite know what it was about today. My lunch time cookies were definitely high calorie and chocolatey enough - but usually I end up blowing my budget on chocolate when I feel like this. Not today.
Something has changed. There was a new thought in my head that reminded me that I don't feel better after I've had a lot of chocolate - and I listened to it. Not in a big drum roll kind of way. The thought came, I heard it, I went, yeah, that's true, and considered the next option: jogging, jasmine tea and bubble bath.
This is new for me. Will it last? I guess I'll have to see how I hold out tomorrow......
Monday, June 25, 2012
I've been reflecting.
Mainly about how I got from where I was 10 months ago to where I am now. And I needed to remind myself that it was lots and lots of very small steps!
Ten minutes of exercise each day, saying no to the delightful little snacks that seem to be everywhere, being diligent with tracking food, joining challenges, blogging, being courageous.
Before and after pictures may be dramatic and inspiring, but don't forget the little steps!! That's what gets us there safely, and, hopefully, permanently!
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Two weeks ago I began an on-line program to help me become better at keeping our apartment clean. This program is a very gentle one and starts with one step: shine your sink, which is something I know I can do, so a good place to start.
Well, well, well.
It's amazing how one little activity can spark a bit of a kitchen revolution! Two weeks in and the sink is still sparkly, and both DH and I have been inspired to clean a little more, a little bit more often. The main focus is still cleaning the sink, packing things away where they are supposed to be and creating a cleaning routine, which doesn't seem like a lot, but is making quite a huge difference in my life. Much like the ten minute exercise streak did when I first started using spark people.
I did hit a brick wall on Friday. That was the day our new oak dining room chairs arrived to replace our £5 outdoor chairs that having been gracing our living/dining room since we married and moved to London. It didn't seem like a big deal, but once these solid, permanent looking chairs were neatly in place, I went into a bit of a panic.
Here I am, at my goal weight, getting my house in order, and buying good furniture. I'm creating order and finding I now have time to think about other things rather than worry about all the things I should be doing - because I've already done them!
All these things hint towards a settled, organised life - a life I don't recognise, in a body that still surprises me when it slips into my size 4 skirts. It's not bad, this feeling. It's just a bit disconcerting. What do you do when the 'to do' list has started doing itself?
Sunday, May 27, 2012
Three years ago I trained up for my first 5Km, my only motivation for it being that I wanted to lose weight. I was under the impression that as long as I started an exercise routine I would lose weight. I trained up and managed to run the race in 37 minutes, but only lost 4 pounds!
I managed to gain back the weight I had lost and came to the conclusion that I needed to train for a longer race - maybe if I ran more I would lose more. So, in 2011 I ran my first 10km.
I loved this race. I managed to lose about 6 pounds while training for this one and felt a great sense of accomplishment at completing it in 59.33. However, during the last km, I began to experience pain in my left leg, which left me unable to walk the next day (I found that a pretty scary experience) and resulted in my future runs always ending with the same sharp pain shooting through my leg at the 30 minute mark. I persevered, and ran two more races, but my training and my times suffered. I didn't lose any more weight, and, actually gained everything back again.
It was after The Nun run, (hence the fancy dress!) that I began to consider that perhaps there was some truth in what people were saying about needing to diet as well as exercise.
After a lot of debate, I joined sparkpeople. I had also been advised by my doctor to stop jogging and start strength training and cross training in order to strengthen and heal my leg. That was in September 2011. Gradually, as I began to lose weight and get stronger, I began to start jogging again.
Today, I ran my first race since the Nun Run. It was the Race for life 5km, which I completed in 25 minutes! Not only that, but I came 23rd out of the 9000 or so people taking part ! And, I managed to do the whole thing pain free!!
So, I'm converted : if you want to lose weight, don't just exercise, count your calories too!
thank you, sparkpeople.
Thursday, May 03, 2012
And I'm still skinny !! Because I still find myself a little surprised by that whenever I jump on the scale.
I think I have been at my current weight now for about two months. My original goal was 59kg (130 pounds, I think) and I went on to lose another 5kg while I think I was still making sense of what maintenance actually means!! I've been at 54kg for about two months now (give or take, I seem to be able to stay within half kilo of that weight every week for the last little while). I'm happy at this weight and feel quite relaxed about it, which is great. I do still have to remind myself on a weekly basis that I have actually done it, especially as the longer I am at this weight, the more normal it feels and I start to forget what an achievement it is for me.
Which leads into the inevitable 'its all about how you feel inside' part of maintenance. Because it is is simply one of those undeniable truths. If I don't feel so great on the inside, I end up looking at myself in the mirror and thinking 'you've gained weight' even though my precious scale denies it!!
My new realisation is that I need to start eating healthier. I eat less, but I still eat too much sugar. So, I've signed up to the 'tame your sweet tooth' challenge and have started by challenging the cookie monster inside me. In the last two weeks I've started allowing cookies back into the house, thinking I could handle them, but, seeing as yesterday I ate 11 of them in about ten minutes, I think I still have a long journey ahead of me!!
It's simply a case of not being fully aware of what I'm doing and I also think I may be in a bit of a rut with my routine meals. So, I will be investigating an alternative to my usual ham sandwich at lunch (I do love them, but have been eating them every week day for about five months now!!) to see if the variety will make me less likely to crave a cookie at 4.30pm.
I also think I need to research a healthy 4.30pm snack. My budget limit is 1800 calories, so I can definitely afford to eat a healthier snack at that time. I just need it to be as appealing to me as a nice chocolate cookie is.
As this cookie over-eating trend is recent for me, I'm also going to give myself a treat every evening when I manage to get through the day without eating any! (Renting a movie or downloading a favourite song, probably).
As my outside appearance is a good one now, I really want to start working on what's going on inside me. Starting with what I choose to eat and leading on to what I choose to think about. I hope that will give even more strength to stay at my goal!
Get An Email Alert Each Time SUNSHINE20113 Posts