Thursday, November 21, 2013
My son made crabby patties for dinner. If you have a small boy, you'll know that they are a Sponge-Bob burger, like a normal burger -but loaded. He was so excited to cook, that I had to let him make them and then eat what he gave me with a smile.
Now that he's in bed I can confess.......ohhhh....my poor stomach. I think raw onions, horseradish, big beef patties and a ton of mayo was just too much.
But he was happy that we loved his 'crabby patties', that's what counts. Now excuse me while I go lie down.
Saturday, November 16, 2013
In the last year and a half I've been through a ton of stress. We had a death in the family, then we moved to a new area, then I lost my job. I quit smoking about a year and a half ago. I turned 40 during the past year, and I may have started pre-menopause. I know it's early, and I'm self-diagnosing, but I've got hot flashes all the time now.
In my professional life, I'm trying to start a small business, trying to find a full-time job, trying to be a student so that I can be current and marketable in my industry, trying to increase my income so that I can get my mother-in-law out of my spare room and into her own apartment. AND of course, raising a child.
In other words, my mind and stress level have been pushed to the limit repeatedly. I'm busy.
I've got to-do lists that are pages long.
Pre-menopause is suppose to cause weight gain, and after the age of 40 a woman's metabolism slows. AND, I quit smoking. These are all contributors, I realize this. When I quit, I said to myself "I'm going to be smart, and I'm going to keep my weight where it is. I WON'T gain the weight many smokers do when they quit".
And guess what? I did anyway. I gained 15 pounds. But why, with everything going on, am I so focused on these 15 pounds? They are a weight on my shoulders, not only on my belly.
Why do I spend so much of my energy focused on something that really matters to no one but me? When I get out of bed, I think about what to eat for breakfast, and not in a "oh, I need to fuel my body way" but in a "What is the largest amount of nutrients and proteins I can fit into the smallest amount of calories?" way. I obsess.
When I get dressed I think about what is going to hide my extra pounds and be flattering. During my day I read articles about different diets, I join in debates about carb/no carb lifestyles. I think about where and when to exercise, read healthy recipes about what to make for dinner.
Don't get me wrong, exercise is important like eating healthy is. They make me feel good and will hopefully lengthen my lifespan. I don't intend to stop either one of those things, but I will stop being so vain. Because that's what it is. Vanity. Doesn't the word have a negative connotation to it?
I'm healthy. My triglycerides, cholesterol, etc are perfect. My body works as it should. My family loves me as I am, so do I, really. It's all just vanity.
I need to shift my priorities. I'm going to start by making an effort to recognize when these thoughts invade my day and re-focus them. It'll be like meditation. Focus on the candle, when your mind drifts (because it will), bring it back to the candle. The exercise is in bringing your mind back to where you want it to be, over and over, until it becomes second nature.
And I don't want my mind to be in my belly fat. It doesn't belong there.
Tuesday, November 12, 2013
“Whatever is deeply, essentially female--the life in a woman's expression, the feel of her flesh, the shape of her breasts, the transformations after childbirth of her skin--is being reclassified as ugly, and ugliness as disease. These qualities are about an intensification of female power, which explains why they are being recast as a diminution of power. At least a third of a woman's life is marked with aging; about a third of her body is made of fat. Both symbols are being transformed into operable condition--so that women will only feel healthy if we are two thirds of the women we could be. How can an "ideal" be about women if it is defined as how much of a female sexual characteristic does not exist on the woman's body, and how much of a female life does not show on her face?”
― Naomi Wolf, The Beauty Myth: How Images of Beauty are Used Against Women
To me, this is a powerful quote. I for one refuse to consider myself two/thirds of a woman. the fat on my body and wrinkles on my face are not ugly. My challenge to myself is to get past the mental block I carry regarding fat, wrinkles and 'ideals' of beauty.
Monday, November 04, 2013
I downloaded this today, it cost me 1.99. Right away I looked for three fruits/vegetables I was buying: Green Beans, Mushrooms, and Pomegranates.
There is no data for mushrooms or pomegranates. Nothing. It's as if they don't exist. As for green beans, the data was what was advertised: How to buy, handle, nutrition info, and recipes. This may be helpful on the produce aisle for me when I'm looking for inspiration, I'll have to see.
Having such an incomplete database gives me a negative impression of this app though. I wouldn't recommend it.
Sunday, November 03, 2013
For the last week I've been hitting 10,000 steps or using the stationary bike every day. I had to start breaking up the monotony of the bike so I made a deal with myself that days I get my steps in I am excused from the bike. This is subject to revision of course, I'm forever making deals with myself. Remember that show 'Let's Make a Deal'? I should have been on that.
I haven't been tracking here because I've started using the "my fitness tracker" app on my smartphone. I know, sounds disloyal to SP, right? Truth is that the foods I eat and european brands are not in the SP tracker and since I haven't had a lot of luck with tracking so far, I thought I'd try this. The problem is that I don't get my points or trophies that I used to.
It seems to be worth it though because I have noticed a difference; I've lost two pounds this week. I'm not going to celebrate that yet because I tend to fluctuate within 4 pounds on an almost weekly basis. If I'm still at this weight next week (or lower), I'll shout it out to everyone!
So, what have I done last week? On Wednesday I walked 14,000 steps along the beach through 3 towns. I thought it was pretty cool to see the boats and beach barriers.
On Thursday I walked past some lovely olive groves up a path leading to a castle.
Yesterday I took the dog walking in the morning and in the afternoon went to the aquarium where we found Nemo!
And I want to leave you with this photo. Halloween isn't an Italian holiday. In recent years some businesses and amusement parks have been celebrating with decorations, but it's hit or miss. Here is a photo I took on my walk showing that someone is a little confused:
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