Tuesday, July 12, 2011
Obedience V. Rebellion?
Rebellion is winning.
I see where I came "back", blogged 3 days in a row and have not been around since. And my results???
Gain. Feeling FAT! Feeling slow. Fighting vicious voices in my head.
This is sooooooo not good.
I would love to take this time to declare my new strategy. To be determined, motivated, obedient to my own plan.
But failure, repeatedly, tells me that does not work!
One step at a time. One choice at a time. Being mindful of the choices-works.
Losing sight of the moment, allowing the negative voices their say, general apathy-doesn't work.
...I've always fancied myself a rebel. I find it romantic, sexy, empowering. But in my new "adulthood" (I turned 40 on my last Bday and it feels like a new beginning) I have found that rebellion is not *all that*. It is usually spontaneous, not well planned or thought out. It usually has no clarity-maybe a good intention, but no real foundation. Obedience, on the other hand, is solid. It needs a goal. It needs steps. It requires focus. And it allows for the occasional rebellious curve, but will always be there beckoning me back. Obedience is my new rebellion.
For this week I will find 10 minutes of exercise a day. I will drink gobs of water. I will find veggies the majority of the coverage of my plate. I will enjoy obeying these "rules". My goal is NOT feeling fat. It is having a smaller number on the scale and the tape measure. It is being conscience of my choices.