STEPH-KNEE   80,651
SparkPoints
80,000-99,999 SparkPoints
 
 
STEPH-KNEE's Recent Blog Entries

So Close I Can Taste It!

Thursday, July 11, 2013


As of this morning, I am 202.2! emoticon Unleash the emoticon's and emoticon's! So many milestones for me coming up. First off 202.2 is a milestone in itself, because I was 205 at age 18, and I am now 27. So this is the first time I've seen ANYTHING under 205 in 9 years. 202 on the nose will be 70 pounds lost! emoticon And of course everyone knows about the promiseland, ONEDERLAND is right around the corner! emoticon I know that when I see that number on the scale streamers aren't going to fall from the ceiling or anything extreme. I also know that only my closest family members will know, because I don't go around telling people at work my weight LOL, but it is so exciting! I look forward to taking a comparison pic and posting a blog and hoping that my dear Spark Friends (that's you guys emoticon) will party with me!

I have wanted this for so long (years and years), and despite being stuck in a 10 pound range for over 6 months, I really feel like I have the momentum moving in the right direction, and it's onward to goal! I know there will be bumps in the road, nothing is ever perfect, but I just feel like there is no stopping me now. When a plateau comes, I'll hold on for dear life and keep pushing til I get past it. I am just so excited to think in 1-3 weeks I can celebrate Onederland! Hopefully it doesn't take the 3 weeks, but my body can be a fickle thing, and so I am prepared to have to hang on for a little longer if my body so decides! But when that time comes I hope you will all join me in a Celebration, the drinks will be on me! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

HEATHERFREE 7/16/2013 7:44PM

    ahhhh yes! It is all about hanging on during the hard times and never losing sight of what we want! I am SO excited for you!!!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CRYSTALIOWA 7/15/2013 2:07PM

    I am sooooo excited for you!!! I cant wait for ONDERLAND emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PIZZAHOLIC33 7/15/2013 10:38AM

    Congratulations! Keep up the amazing work! You're inspiring!

emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUSTLIKEALICE 7/14/2013 1:07AM

    I'm so excited for you! Hopefully I will be joining you there soon! :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 7/13/2013 7:48PM

    Woot Woot! Yeah I am ready! I am sitting on pins and needles! OUCH! Well I think I should get off that stuff! lol I have the confetti ready and I have cued up the "Ain't No Stoppin' Us Now!" song ready to go!!! You are on the train and ready to pull into the station to ONEDERLAND!!!! I am so proud of you!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 7/13/2013 12:26PM

    I'm so excited for you! I'm going to be living through you when that happens cuz you're gonna reach it before me! Lol! I know exactly what you mean about the number too! I haven't seen anything below 200 in 11-12 years. So you can imagine what I'm gonna do when I see that '1' in front of my number. I know I'm gonna scream and dance. I'm so serious. I am gonna dance all over the house w/ my dog watching me cut a fool! I can't wait! How exciting for you Steph! You're doing so well and I'm so pround of you for holding on during those plateaus! That's not an easy thing to do, and now it's going to pay off! I will def be here celebrating with you! Yay!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HAWTGRANNY2014 7/12/2013 10:44PM

    That is so awesome and it looks like people are standing in line to celebrate with you. emoticon heres to your success.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MYHUBBYISMYHERO 7/12/2013 8:56PM

    We are looking forward to helping you celebrate.
Sharon

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBADEAU 7/12/2013 3:11PM

    So awesome Steph!! I'm crossing my fingers that it comes off quickly!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIGER_LILY_613 7/12/2013 1:48PM

    Woohoo ! emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MINDYSUE65 7/12/2013 1:07PM

    emoticon I'll get the streamers ready!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BRADMILL2922 7/12/2013 11:30AM

    You are getting so close! That is awesome! How great is it that you are at your lowest weight in 9 years?! Congrats and keep pushing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SIMONEKP 7/12/2013 8:14AM

    I'll be here to celebrate with you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACOBSBELOVED 7/11/2013 5:36PM

    Also, the cat picture is hilarious emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACOBSBELOVED 7/11/2013 5:35PM

    I am so excited and so proud of you!!!!! Too bad there won't be any streamers or confetti over your scale when you see your weight beginning with a 1, because you totally deserve them! You can definitely count on me to celebrate with you!


Report Inappropriate Comment
JACKSGRAN 7/11/2013 5:15PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Well done! You are doing SO WELL!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MLJSPARK 7/11/2013 11:47AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon


I'm stocking up those emoticon party supplies in preparation! Can't wait to celebrate with you soon!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIMELAG 7/11/2013 11:19AM

    I will totally be there to celebrate with you- and I know you'll do the same for me when I get there very soon! I am so proud of you!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
PATJOONWW 7/11/2013 10:35AM

    emoticon emoticon that is so exciting! You Can Do It!

Keep up the good work and much success on your journey!
~Pat~ emoticon


Report Inappropriate Comment
ADARKARA 7/11/2013 10:18AM

    Dude, you get your entry pass for the ONEderland Cafe when you reach 199, didn't you know that? I'm saving you a seat, girlfriend!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
FLGIRL1234 7/11/2013 10:10AM

    Of course you will get the streamers and balloons....from us here on Spark! Can't wait to share in that day with you. Great job so far! That's amazing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CMA444 7/11/2013 10:03AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUSTCHELLE75 7/11/2013 9:33AM

    Congratulations

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEIDRESH 7/11/2013 9:25AM

    way to go!!! you are so close and I know it is an accomplishment that you are super proud of!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MEGYSU 7/11/2013 9:05AM

    Congratulations! You are so close - keep up the good work and the wonderful attitude.

Report Inappropriate Comment
FINCHFEEDER80 7/11/2013 8:57AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JECKIE 7/11/2013 8:53AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOVELY_STELFI 7/11/2013 8:04AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NANNABLACK 7/11/2013 7:25AM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SKINNYINMYHEAD 7/11/2013 6:48AM

    Oh hell yeah I'll be there to celebrate with you! I am freaking EXCITED!!!!!

Annie

Report Inappropriate Comment
MARYBETH4884 7/11/2013 6:36AM

    Streamers and balloons will not rain down from the ceiling, but you will still be jumping for joy and doing a happy dance. This is the most personal journey any person can take and so much of the joy is internal! But we are here to celebrate with you because we understand where you are at! Personally I'm at 201.6 so I really really understand your excitement and anticipation.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNWANNABE 7/11/2013 6:22AM

    I'm sorry, but a drink isn't enough for me, you've seen where at the football games they dump an ice chest or the water cooler over their heads? emoticon I'm so happy for you.. it's motivated me tonight.. I do not have to blow it! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TRYJESUS2DAY 7/11/2013 6:17AM

    Steph-Knee I'm getting my drink ready now (water), because I KNOW you can do it. emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


BLC Fit Test Results - 4 Weeks Later

Sunday, July 07, 2013

I just love my team, and I love our Captain. emoticon I swear I'm really not trying to emoticon butt here, but I just love this fit test thing. But the thing that is great is having us revisit it just 4 weeks later. At 6 weeks in, half way through the challenge it sometimes feels like you don't have time to really improve and get to where you need to be. But at just 4 weeks in, I still have 8 weeks to improve upon this, and that is super exciting!

As far as weight goals, I started the challenge at 211.6, and as of last weigh in I was 204.6... A 7 pound loss in 4 weeks, not too shabby. My overall goal was to get to 195, so 9.6 pounds to go with 8 weeks left and I really feel like I can do it if I push it! :)

1 Mile Walk: 19.37 --->18:50 emoticon
Crunches: 50 ----> 75 emoticon
Plank: 20 seconds ----> 20 seconds (Needs major work)
Wall Sit: 50 seconds ---> 70 secs emoticon
(Modified) Squats: 15 ----> 25 emoticon
(Wall) Pushups: 25 ----> 40 emoticon
(For Fun) Hula Hoop: 3 minutes -----> 3 minutes

Flexibility before & after (almost identical but still working on it.)


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MAMACHAMBS 7/10/2013 8:57PM

    OMG! You are rocking this challenge! I can;t wait to see what 8 and 12 weeks brings for you! Keep at the flexibility. I know you can do it.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEWADDICTNOMORE 7/10/2013 2:01AM

    emoticon job!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
COOKIE_AT_51 7/8/2013 3:14AM

    emoticon emoticon that is awesome girl! emoticon towards your goals and you WILL get there in 8 weeks. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 7/8/2013 2:53AM

    emoticon emoticon Look at hat progress! I am so proud of you! You are making some real improvements. Those are things that the scale won't tell you! Not only have you lost weight but you are able to see other successes!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WEBEZE 7/8/2013 1:49AM

    Way to go. Awesome improvement. Can't wait to hear your results in 8 weeks.
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SUSANELAINE1956 7/7/2013 6:31PM

    That is a lot of improvement in 4 weeks. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 7/7/2013 12:56PM

    You're rockin' it girl! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHOCOHOLIC2276 7/7/2013 10:27AM

    You're already showing improvement, emoticon Great job and congratulations on your loss so far emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMARILYNH 7/7/2013 9:16AM

    Wow - great improvement!! And I love the idea of the 4 week 'check-up' - awesome!! Great job!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SKINNYINMYHEAD 7/7/2013 8:50AM

    Wow... that is significant improvement in 4 weeks!!! Something to be VERY proud of !!!! Yeah you!!! and I hear ya on the planks... they make me suffffeeerrrrrrr

Annie

Report Inappropriate Comment
MERRY_XMAS 7/7/2013 7:39AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHICAT63 7/7/2013 6:47AM

    You are doing awesome ! You can do it, because you rock. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAGGIEVAN 7/7/2013 6:24AM

    You are doing well! Congrats and keep going.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MKLEINSC 7/7/2013 5:58AM

    Yay! You've made some great improvements. And congrats on the weight loss! :) I look forward to hearing how the next 8 weeks go!

Report Inappropriate Comment


Sparky Won't Let Me Be Lazy! :D

Friday, July 05, 2013

I have had Sparky since the end of January, and somehow I think if I had him a year ago, I'd be at goal right now. emoticon I am off 3-4 days a week and I walk him each day off. When I am at work on the weekends, his Memaw (my mom) or his boyfriend (my brother, technically his uncle but I just called him his boyfriend from the beginning so too late LOL... but Sparky loves him a lot) come over and take him for his walk. So he knows, without fail, that at some point the leash and harness are coming out and he is getting to go for his walk. emoticon



I live across the street from a park with a huge firework display. emoticon I was so worried how Sparky would react, but he did so good. We played and we had fun while the fireworks were going off, and then when it got to the finale he got a little nervous and we snuggled on the couch until it was over. emoticon

He did so good and I was so proud of him, because it was super loud! I had decided we weren't going for a walk, because even though we go at night, we'd have to wait til all the people cleared out and it just wasn't worth it to go that late. As I am sitting on the couch, 11:00 last night, he casually walks over to his leash, that is sitting on top of a box and he sniffs it. I swear it was like he was saying "the leash is still here, what's the problem?!"



That's all it took. Before I knew it I told him we would go for one, a short one, but that he deserved to go. So off we went, a short walk for us is now a mile, which funnily enough I used to struggle to finish. We went almost 2 miles and came back home and he was just so happy! I love my little Sparky, and it's just a huge perk that he will not let me be lazy. I can skimp on other forms of exercise, I can eat poorly, but he makes sure that no matter how well or horrible I am doing, that I at least get in our walks... and for the most part when that is happening, the other parts of the puzzle (eating, exercise etc.) all work together.



I am confident with Sparky around, I'll never be allowed to be lazy, and I'm okay with that! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DEBADEAU 7/8/2013 8:00PM

    He looks like one cool dude!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESSICA_STULTZ 7/6/2013 6:51PM

    I think Sparky was definitely a good find for you! He will keep you nice and busy.. and help you get your exercise in too!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HIDDENRUNES 7/6/2013 12:52PM

    Yay! That's why I love my dog too...he will sit in the doorway and just stare at you when it's time for his walk, great motivation.

Report Inappropriate Comment
KBLASEN 7/6/2013 9:00AM

    Sparky friend emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MARYBETH4884 7/6/2013 6:48AM

    Sparky is just your personal trainer! He knows what you need to do! He's a cutie!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MKLEINSC 7/6/2013 5:48AM

    Love it! I would love to have a dog, but I don't have anyone around that could help me out with it while I am doing my 12-16 hour shifts on my weekends.

Report Inappropriate Comment
MERRY_XMAS 7/6/2013 5:25AM

    Thumbs up for your own personal trainer!!!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WEBEZE 7/6/2013 12:32AM

    WTG Sparky. It is so nice to have a Spark to remind you to keep sparking.
emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACKIE542 7/5/2013 11:52PM

    Sparky is a great fitness buddy. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
SKINNYINMYHEAD 7/5/2013 10:30PM

    Ahhhh Yeah you and Sparky!! Loved this blog... You and Sparky just keep on walking! It's such a positive thing for both of you!

Annie

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 7/5/2013 10:21PM

    The Sparkmeister rules!!! He name suits him very well because he is the SPARK that keeps you moving! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 7/5/2013 9:54PM

    Sparky is the bomb diggity! Woot!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOTHEPRO 7/5/2013 9:35PM

    Yay for Sparky!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DIETER27 7/5/2013 8:03PM

  Dogs are great and they always make sure you get in your exercise.

Report Inappropriate Comment
RUNNING-LIFE 7/5/2013 7:57PM

    Dogs are awesome aren't they? I love the pics you added!

Report Inappropriate Comment


The Binge Monster - I Thought I Had Beat It, But I Was Wrong :(

Wednesday, July 03, 2013



One minute I have it all together, things are emoticon's and emoticon's, and then something happens that is outside of my control, and I go running towards food. This is a process and I am learning a lot about myself... but I am learning that when I am hurt, even after all this time, I turn to food to soothe myself. Knowing that is half the battle, and I fought it for over 24 hours before I gave in.

I use the term binge loosely, and it seems everyone has different definitions of what constitutes a binge. I have heard stories of binging that are nothing like what I do... but what I do I consider it a binge. It is a conscious thing for me and it always involves fast food. It isn't a fridge full of food or anything, but it is still a large amount of food, always high in calories. The one that happened just an hour ago consisted of Chili cheese fries, jalapeno poppers and chicken nuggets. Definitely too much food for one meal, and too many calories for the day. Add on top of that I had already eaten my calories for the day and was not hungry when I did this, and that just spells out disaster. emoticon

I have been feeling hurt over something personal, but turning to food was never the answer and I knew that... but low and behold I did it anyways. I know that I am not perfect by any means, and "stuff happens", but this isn't something that happens to everyone. People who don't struggle with their weight and even those that do don't find themselves at the drive thru ordering a large amount of food when they aren't hungry because they are upset. It isn't one of those things that "everyone does" and that makes me really look into why I do it.

Sitting here now, I am still upset over the original issue, the food was so greasy that my stomach hurts, and I am disappointed in myself. I knew this would happen, and I did it anyways. I have spent some time journaling and that has helped, but I need to help myself BEFORE I binge next time, not after the damage is done.

I am prepared to move forward, and not beat myself up for it. From my past experiences, I know that beating myself up will lead to even more binges, and that is the last thing I need to do. I need to work on getting stronger a day at a time. I tracked my dreaded emoticon sticker that indicates a day I eat over 3,000 calories, and I am making it my goal for that to be the ONLY cupcake sticker in July. In June I only had one cupcake sticker and that wasn't for a binge, it was because I went to the buffet in Vegas and I just assumed it was a cupcake sticker kind of day lol. I was doing so well, and I can't afford another week or two off track.

I honestly can't believe how much I let outside forces (i.e. boys emoticon) have such an effect on me to the point where all I know to do is turn to food. I have come a long way, in that I never get a random feeling to binge or eat that way. It used to be a regular thing. It went from everyday that was my dinner, to a few times a month wanting to eat that way, and now it seems to just be an emotional response to something bad. I have at least gotten to a point where these encounters are few and far between, and if I continue to be accountable and continue to grow as a person, I can only hope they get even fewer and farther between.

This is just accountability for me... sometimes you guys tell me the nicest things that I'm such an inspiration or am doing so well and it is the sweetest thing... but I am also human and I fall and I like for people to see the good and the bad of things so that they know we all slip sometimes... we just have to remember to keep getting back up. emoticon emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DEBADEAU 7/8/2013 8:04PM

    The binge monster happens!! The good news is that it isn't the star if the show anymore, just a guest appearance. Emotional eating is so tough to deal with. You will bounce back for sure!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESSICA_STULTZ 7/6/2013 6:49PM

    The binging and emotional eating is how I got myself to my highest weight. I'd literally eat my emotions. Eat to celebrate, eat because I was fat and depressed.. (which just made things worse), eat to grieve, eat when I'm angry, eat cuz I'm bored, eat because everyone else is. I still do these from time to time.. but I'm working on them. Especially eating when I am bored, angry, or sad. Those are my worst ones. Wish there was some sort of big sign that would stop us from eating when we weren't really eating because we were hungry because a lot of times I do it without even noticing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SKINNYINMYHEAD 7/4/2013 12:01PM

    Oh lil' sister.. this so made me cry... I have been there.. binging... stuffing my emotions.. it's how I got up to 400lbs.. just know that I believe in you.. in the person you ARE right this moment... and know that you will not let yesterday's binge impact todays success.. be kind to yourself.. .

Annie

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUSTLIKEALICE 7/4/2013 1:57AM

    You have got this. And you are absolutely right, keep trying to dig at that source! :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
MARIANNE9855 7/4/2013 12:18AM

    The Binge Monster is a persistent foe but the fact that they are happening less is significant progress. We can't change how we learned to cope with our feelings overnight- relapse is a part of recovery- as long as the overall journey is making progress you will get there. I had a great 4-5 months losing weight and then I kind of slowed down- I haven't been binging per se but I have been eating more than I can and still lose weight. I'm gradually trying to work back down but its hard. I take comfort in the fact that what I am eating most of the time is much healthier than before and it will improve my health at the very least.
so just keep pushing we all understand and we are all hanging on together. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACKIE542 7/3/2013 10:14PM

    I agree we are human and we just have to keep getting back up. Looks like that is what you are doing, good job. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNWANNABE 7/3/2013 10:05PM

    I read this last night when I was struggling too [but was too tired to post] now I'm going to read through the responses you got; as by morning I over did it and ate all of today calories. emoticon (I tracked what I ate, it didn't leave me any room for ANYTHING today; so, though it will put me over I'm trying to eat very light.)

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACOBSBELOVED 7/3/2013 7:12PM

    Like you said, you're human and you fall. You've fallen plenty of times, dusted yourself off, and moved forward. I know you're disappointed with how you dealt with your hurt feelings, but you're still looking for other ways to cope when something unexpected happens. Just because you've been doing this a while doesn't mean you're going to do it all perfectly.

You take that cupcake sticker, put it on the little square for today, and then you get back to doing what you've been doing. Pretty soon that cupcake will be days and then eventually weeks away. It will be all in the past and hopefully you won't be too hard on yourself because you're still learning. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
OCEANMISTCALI 7/3/2013 6:01PM

    I totally relate to you on this issue all to well. I am dealing with it too myself. so I sympathize completely with you and what you are dealing with. maybe we can helps each other

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESUSLIGHTSMEUP 7/3/2013 5:58PM

  What I have learned so far and this is the third time back here on sparkpeople is that this is a spiritual battle.

Now, just meditate on this truth and go from there because I did and I am losing weight and am in control. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MERRY_XMAS 7/3/2013 4:58PM

    My definition of binge is eating whatever there is in the fridge (not freggies included ofc!) non-stop... I mean NON-STOP. I end up eating 15 slices of bread, 10 rusks, endless cheese and whatever sweet there is, like tablespoons of honey.

My trigger is "postponing things"... I usually distract myself from over-eating with the garden, talking to the phone with friends, watching TV series etc. But if there is something more important (like an upcoming test) and I postpone doing something about it, I use food to distract me from the stress and make me feel complete and happy.

We all have our "bad days", but as you said, the important part is that there are fewer times that we give in. And even if we do, we don't give up!

emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JADED_CHICK19 7/3/2013 3:07PM

    I know exactly how you feel! I am also a fast food binger. I love the grease..I love the taste..and it makes ya feel full and warm inside...till the next morning..like you said it made you sick and thats what it does to me now that I've been eating healthy for over a month. Don't kick yourself over it..Learn from it! Find a vice other than FF that works and is a healthier option..possibly a bubblebath or a favorite movie..or maybe try and exercise and get that agression and hurt out!

You got this girl!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MEGYSU 7/3/2013 2:58PM

    You mention that emotional eating isn't something everyone does - which is true, of course - but I think it's probably more common than you think. How often do we see people (particularly women) on TV reach for a pint of icecream when something bad happens? You are not alone and you have a really great attitude. Good for you for acknowledging the "oops" and moving on without beating yourself up too bad. Keep it up, girl, you're doing awesome!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHOCOHOLIC2276 7/3/2013 1:41PM

    Why must food be a source of comfort? I go through this too. I don't know what it is. It fills an emotional hole with a sense of physical fullness.

You're not alone in this battle. Know that it is something others deal with, like me. Journaling seems to help but sometimes the binge is stronger than you are. I hope you find a way to deal with it. You're doing good so far though, dropping the frequency down to once a month? I would consider this a victory emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
WHOVIANGIRL23 7/3/2013 12:09PM

    Super duper emoticon . The binge monster is evil, I don't find myself in the fast food drive thru, but I have my "designated" foods. When I run to food and binge, ill generally buy a pint of ice cream, a package of cookies, and a candy bar. And sometimes a soda. I like the sweets.
Sorry to hear you're having a rough time. I'm here if you need to talk. Get back up, shake it off, and kick ass the rest of this week. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ZELDABEE 7/3/2013 11:06AM

    I get it. I totally get it - my last encounter with the binge monster was a week ago today. Sometimes when I'm rocking my calories and workouts I feel like I've banished him for good but turns out I've only managed to wrangle him to back of my mine and he creeps up on me when I go to a dark place. I am an emotional eater, I always going to be an emotional eater and I'm learning that it's okay. What's not okay if letting it control my life and i think we are both on the same page there!

I know I'm like a country away but if you ever need someone to just listen you know where to find me. heck, we can even swap cell phone numbers for texting! I always love a new texting buddy.

Report Inappropriate Comment
TIMELAG 7/3/2013 10:35AM

    I can relate to this so much, Stephanie. Please feel free to talk to me privately about this, if you like. We may be able to help each other!

We both need those emoticon and emoticon back!

Report Inappropriate Comment
AMARILYNH 7/3/2013 10:19AM

    emoticon Steph, we are ALL human and for those of us with a weight issue sometimes we turn to food when we want comfort. You said it yourself - those times are becoming fewer!! That is PROGRESS my friend - and being able to look back and see that in the aftermath the food didn't truly comfort you..... I suspect it will become easier and easier to find another kind of comfort.

Interesting what you said about a 'binge' being different things to different people. They also change - my last 'binge' was two packages of Skinny Cow Dreamy clusters (120 cals each) and three pieces of Russell Stover Sugarfree Chocolate Mints (180 cals for the 3). Why? Because those were the only 'goodies' in the house and I live 9 miles from the nearest grocery store or fast food place!! LOL - one more blessing of living in the country!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CBLENS 7/3/2013 10:09AM

    We all have the binge monster within us. and yes it shows it's open mouth every now & then....I just get more exercise in when that happens.

Report Inappropriate Comment
ADARKARA 7/3/2013 9:44AM

    Think of it this way: you didn't fall on your butt. You tripped. You saw the rock coming, and you lost your balance, but you didn't fall. You can keep going exactly from where you are. emoticon

Fortunately for me, I am not an emotional eater. In fact, I'm the opposite: I DON'T eat when I'm upset. I eat when I'm bored, which is far more often, LOL. But now I try to occupy myself with some other activity. Maybe the next time you are upset you could take your dog for a nice long walk? Leave the cash at home and you won't be tempted to buy anything!

Report Inappropriate Comment
PUNKY100 7/3/2013 9:10AM

    UGH BOYS!!! AMIRITE?!?!?!

Sorry you had to contend with the binge monster last night. At least that boy you have whapped back into place! ;-) Good job keeping it to 1 cupcake day last month, that is AWESOME!!!! :-D

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NANA2PRINCESSES 7/3/2013 8:06AM

    The binge monster is a frequent visitor to my house as well. I think all of us who deal with emotional eating are well acquainted. The strategy of keeping low cal. filling foods at hand is a good one. The ultimate answer of course is figuring out the root cause and dealing with it, but that is easier said than done. I'm glad you are not beating yourself up over the issue, and moving ahead with your July goals.
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ELRIDDICK 7/3/2013 7:14AM

  Thanks for sharing

Report Inappropriate Comment
JRAY864 7/3/2013 7:12AM

    Gotta hate that binge monster. He visits my house sometimes. I keep my favorite binge treat on hand - fat free popsicles. They have only 10 calories, so you can eat the whole box and not be in trouble. Also, keep personal size bags of plain popcorn and lots of fruit on hand at all times. Then - when the binge monster visits, feed it good things. Better yet, make a pact with a friend to meet for coffee instead of being home when the monster visits. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GLUECIPHER 7/3/2013 7:12AM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Vacation + Compliments from Gammie!

Sunday, June 30, 2013

emoticon emoticon As everyone knows, it's been flippin hot, especially in Vegas. It was 116 most days, which was fine because the only time spent outside was to get to and from the car. The bad news was that it NEVER cooled off. I was planning to walk Sparky at midnight even, but it was still 100 degrees! Sparky said, "it's too flipin hot, let's skip it!"


I am not making excuses, I could have done other exercises, but I can't lie to you... I enjoyed just relaxing! It was a relatively short trip, I got there Tuesday night and left Saturday night. I had the buffet on Wednesday as planned, but we also went out to dinner on Friday as well which wasn't planned. So my eating wasn't the best, but there was something so great about just having 3 days to relax and enjoy myself.



emoticon The biggest eye opener for me was that my "overeating" while on vacation was similar to how the 272-pound-Stephanie would eat on a normal day. My tummy actually hurt after the day at the buffet, and I didn't even stuff myself to the brim like I could have. emoticon It was a great eye opener just to see how different my life is now, and I have no desire to go back to my old ways!


^Sparky and Gammie were winners! emoticon

Instead of focusing on the fact I overate and didn't get to walk Sparky, let's focus on the good stuff.

emoticon I was on track for 6 weeks without a slip up prior to vacation. The old me would have said "you are going on vacation in a week, might as well wait to start your DIET when you come back from vacation." A week long vacation could easily turn into 2 months of me not pursuing my weight loss goals, not this time.

emoticon I am back on track the FIRST day of coming back. No easing back into this, because it isn't a diet, it's a lifestyle, and things that were okay for me on vacation are not okay now.

emoticon I am only up 2 pounds, and I know this will come right off! I spent a week in Vegas with my Gammie in the past and come back home up 7-9 pounds, so this is a huge victory for me.

emoticon My Gammie gave me a couple compliments, and they were so out of the blue that they meant that much more. One was "You don't realize how small you are getting!" And the other was about how I have a waist line. I have to admit, when you are still 200 pounds, you don't feel small. As far as I've come, I am still a big girl and sometimes I really have to remind myself that I am in a much better place... I do hope as I get closer to my goals that the little voice that stays "you are still big" eventually goes away. I'm working on it though. :)

All in all, I am happy about how I handled my vacation, and how I handled the days leading up to and after it. I have come a long way in accepting this is a lifestyle and I have learned to find balance between splurging and enjoying life, and getting healthier! emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHICAT63 7/3/2013 4:54PM

    That's sound like a great vacation, minus the heat of course !

Report Inappropriate Comment
JADED_CHICK19 7/3/2013 3:11PM

    So jealous you were in Vegas! I LOVE LOVE LOVE Vegas..Ive been there 4 times in the past 5 years and even went there for half of our honeymoon. Everything about it is amazing and I'm so glad to see you had an amazing time :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
MEGYSU 7/2/2013 12:48PM

    Good for you. There is nothing wrong with being relaxed for a few days. I think it truly goes to show that you've made a lifestyle change that you can take a few days "off" and then go right back to healthy habits. Way to go! You are an inspiration.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBADEAU 7/1/2013 9:53PM

    Welcome back Steph! Great to hear you got right back on track!

Report Inappropriate Comment
MERRY_XMAS 7/1/2013 12:20PM

    "The biggest eye opener for me was that my "overeating" while on vacation was similar to how the 272-pound-Stephanie would eat on a normal day. "

You must be very proud!!! You are not only changing your body, but your whole lifestyle!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MOTHEPRO 7/1/2013 11:51AM

    emoticonGreat job getting right back on track! I'm glad you had a great vacation!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEATHERFREE 7/1/2013 11:48AM

    Good job on the vacation!. Yeah that heat is ridiculous down there!!! We are FINALLY getting some heat this summer, the past couple years it has just been crap, not even warm enough to swim at most of the lakes! But boy it was hot yesterday and today I got up at 9am and it was already cookin outside. Your doing a great keep pushing forward!


Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNWANNABE 7/1/2013 5:27AM

    How about this for a complement, last night my brother said I use to look like the kid from A Christmas story that was all bundled up, where his arms stood out to the side, but now they hang down [my husband said, yes.. she's got a waist now]. I guess I went from this emoticon to this emoticon emoticon (OK, I'm still reaching for that last one.) emoticon

Anyway, having said all that, I'm glad you had a good time and didn't get heatstroke or anything, I heard it was miserable there with one person dying? (I feel bad for anyone that has to work outdoors in that kind of weather.)

Also, ARE you ready for a new month? You timed it perfectly, you can start a whole new calendar of stars. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BEANIES_MOM 7/1/2013 4:52AM

    I'm glad you had a great vacation and got to relax! emoticon for getting right back on track.

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACKSGRAN 7/1/2013 4:21AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Sounds as though you had a great time - very well done. Small changes mean a lot.

Report Inappropriate Comment
AFERARI 7/1/2013 1:18AM

    Glad you enjoyed your vacation! Great job getting right back on track (and mostly staying on track as well)! I enjoyed the pics.

Report Inappropriate Comment
WEBEZE 7/1/2013 12:33AM

    Awesome vacation. Good job staying on track and getting right back to it when you got back. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 6/30/2013 10:16PM

    So happy for you! Sounds like you had fun. And nothing wrong w/ relaxing and enjoying life and not counting every calories and worrying about working out. You're back on the grind now so it's all good! And you have come a long way! I tell you all the time...you're def one of my heroes on here. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
MYHUBBYISMYHERO 6/30/2013 10:12PM

    Good for you Stephanie. Sounds like you are back on track. Yeah Stephanie!!! Have a good week.
Headed to bed, work tomorrow. Made 4 batches of whoopie pies today and had one crumb off the cookie sheet. Woo Hoo to me too.
sharon

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 6/30/2013 10:05PM

    Yep I knew you had this on lock down! I am so proud of all that you have accomplished! You could have just threw it all aside and gone gang busters in the food department but you didn't. I am glad you took time to relax and reboot to be ready to take on your work week on your return. You have changed so much in the last couple months! Oh let me say it like a mom...You are growing up so fast! lol

emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NIKKICOLE83 6/30/2013 9:44PM

    I am glad you enjoyed yourself with your gram. Most people come back from Vegas with herpes so the fact that you only brought back two pounds is awesome!!!! emoticon

I know the feeling of realizing how far you have come but still being at a weight or size that reminds you how far you have to go. The good news is that we are only 30 or so pounds from our goal. We have already lost twice that! So this TOO can be done.

Report Inappropriate Comment
SIMONEKP 6/30/2013 9:21PM

    emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JUSTLIKEALICE 6/30/2013 9:09PM

    look at you cutie pie! Glad you had a good vacation! You deserve it!

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 Last Page