STEPH-KNEE   70,625
SparkPoints
60,000-79,999 SparkPoints
 
 
STEPH-KNEE's Recent Blog Entries

My thoughts on life, prediabetes, spark, etc....

Saturday, September 29, 2012

So I posted the A1C number on my last blog, and it was a 5.8. I knew instantly it wasn't good but upon more research I came to find out that it is indeed considered pre diabetes.

I'm not worried at all. Is that cocky or arrogant? Maybe it is. But here is why. All these things I've read have said the #1 way to reverse it is by losing weight and adding exercise. Well I've been doing that for 6 months. If I had been doing nothing about my health, that number would have thrown me for a loop and a lot of reevaluation on my part. But that isn't the case. I don't need to spring into action now, based on a number... I sprung into action 6 months ago when I dropped this 40 pounds.

Even my diabetic Dad who is completely obsessed with that kind of stuff (and rightfully so), he did not even lecture me for a second about the "alarming number". And let me tell you, he loves to lecture me, and well, ANYONE! He simply said that continuing what I've been doing for months would be what it takes to lower that number and make myself healthier in all counts.

Even for giggles, I let Spark People change my nutritional ticker for those with diabetes/pre diabetes, and it left my calories alone. It lowered my carbs, fat and protein. I put in a typical day of what I eat out of curiosity, and I was well within the diabetic ranges which were even a tad more strict than the regular Spark ranges.

So that is where I'm at at this point. I left my ticker on the diabetic settings, because I figured that is the best thing for my current situation. If the number stays the same or goes up when I go back next year, that will blow my mind, because I fully intend to lose 40-50 pounds in the next year (if it takes THAT long), and that will be a separate can of worms. But thank goodness everything I read said even losing 5-10% of your weight can reverse it, and I am going to double that. So according to everything I've read, that number should absolutely be a lot better by this time next year, after a loss of 40 or 50 pounds.

With that said, I am taking a huge step back from Spark for a little bit. Now time out... it's not what you think. I am still going to talk to my circle of friends on a daily basis, I am still going to comment on their blogs regularly, I am still going to log in everyday, log my fitness, track my calories. I am still going to continue to participate in the BLC 20... So I guess I mean I'm just going to step back from the blogging and the putting so much of myself out there. It seems that you can't put yourself out there without getting a shred of negativity from someone, and I can have 20 amazingly supportive comments, but 1 remark from someone that is... not so supportive can send me for a tailspin. So for the time being, the only blogs that are going to come from me will be BLC 20 related, OR milestone related (60 pounds lost, 70 pounds lost, NSV, etc). I think that is what is best for me at this point. :)

*And just to add, if you are one of my TRUE and fabulous Spark Friends, you can be assured this does not pertain to you. emoticon *


  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KASTASTROPHY 10/5/2012 10:31AM

    i COMPLETELY understand!!! oh I don't know how many times the only reason i didn't just flip out on someone was being negative was because of you! so I'm glad you are around and I plan on you being around me lol! and I'm here if you need me!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEATHERFREE 10/5/2012 12:28AM

    Oh ive missed you SO! lol

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHRINK_U 10/3/2012 4:01PM

    I have had several negative comments and sparkmails.. I know exactly what you mean. It really brought me down and made me not want to spark as much. Keep up the great work!

Report Inappropriate Comment
PRINCESSAMY 10/2/2012 9:36AM

    emoticon big hugs

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 9/30/2012 8:06PM

    I love this. I am considered prediabetes too b/c I have PCOS. So I can totally relate to all of this. I didn't even think to set my settings that way. I may do that too! So glad you are going down a healthy path to ensure you will never become diabetic! :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
DUMBBELLE84 9/30/2012 12:58PM

  You're on the right track, girl! Sorry that someone upset you...
Can't wait to be reading about your milestones and NSVs!!


Report Inappropriate Comment
CANDOSUE52 9/30/2012 12:49PM

   
I enjoyed your blog. Thanks, and best wishes on your journey!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JESSICA_STULTZ 9/29/2012 11:37PM

    Don't let anyone get you down. You are amazing.. and we all know you will lose that amount and beat the diabetes that was creeping into your life. Glad you already had a head start because that will probably make things a little easier for you in the long run. Keep up the good work you've done so far and you will hit your goals before you know it!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LRSILVER 9/29/2012 8:15PM

    You are doing great looking into things and working on getting healthier!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
_MOBII_ 9/29/2012 6:11PM

    Keep calm and carry on...because you were headed in the right direction to begin with! That is so great and I am glad you didn't get another lecture from your dad...I know how diabetic dads can be, lol!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACOBSBELOVED 9/29/2012 3:47PM

    You do what you need to do. If you think you need to take a break from blogging (with the exceptions you mentioned) then you do that and whatever else you feel like you need to do in order to keep your Spark space positive. This experience is hard enough without having to deal with comments that you feel aren't influencing you positively.

Not gonna lie, though, I was a little nervous when you said you were going to step back for a little bit, but then you said you were still going to track, chat, and be involved with your BLC group. I still want my blog comments, dang it! :)



Report Inappropriate Comment
CRISSA1669 9/29/2012 12:55PM

    Whooo Hoo!! I can't tell you how thrilled I am to read your blog about this!!! Congratulations on NOT freaking out!!! You are doing what needs to be done to turn this around...it is neither cocky or arrogant, it's the facts What you are doing is taking your health seriously because the statistic is 2 out of 3 is or will be pre-diabetic in the next 5-10 years. Keep on going!!! Your health and life is worth all of the effort you are putting in. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
MISHAMW 9/29/2012 12:08PM

    Congratulation on the losing the weight you have lost!!!

Just to let you know, losing weight sometimes doesn't always help. I lost twenty pounds in four months, went back to my doctor and found out my cholesterol is still high (had to be put on meds for that), and though my Metformin is helping my glucose levels ( I have pre-diabetes IR, or insulin resistance), I am in no way in the clear.

Everyone is different, and I can't stress this enough. Just because 90% of the pre-diabetics out there get better by losing weight, still means that 10% (like me won't).

Just be careful and continue to check your numbers. I hope that it (your numbers) get better fast!

Congrats again on the weight loss and your continual journey towards better health!

Report Inappropriate Comment
NEELIXNKES 9/29/2012 10:17AM

    emoticon on the weight you have lost! emoticon and you will knock that A1C number down. I am currently using the SparkD prediabetes meal plans. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BETHIEBOOPS 9/29/2012 9:49AM

    I am so glad that Spark has such a handy tool to use! And I am 100% on board with your non-panic solution, because you are right- you are already working on it! I am sad to hear that you are taking a step back. I need to also, but am thinking that instead, I'll make my page private. I want to be able to have the arena to share, but DON'T want the judgement that comes with an open page... It's something I'm thinking about...

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEERLADY45 9/29/2012 8:08AM

    emoticon emoticon Your on the right track and when you eat healthier and excercise things really reverses for the better! Blessings ,BONNIE emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 9/29/2012 4:46AM

    I hear ya! Umm let me say that I am SO glad that I am in that circle of friends! I just couldn't stand to not hear from ya! That being said and out of the way. You ROCK!! I love that you are all over this and on top of researching things for yourself. You can do this because you are doing it! I totally understand you decision to pull back. I support you in that. I have been there before! Hmm recently in fact! lol

You just do what you have to do! I am right here with ya! emoticon

emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


Let's Get Physical, Physical!

Friday, September 28, 2012


Okay, I'm a dork. Old news. But that is what came to mind when I had to go to my physical. So I haven't been in 3 years. I don't know, just not a fan of being told I'm fat and need to lose weight. I've known that since about age 12, and don't need some chick to tell me that again.

My dad (who has always been super active and healthy), my grandma and uncle all have diabetes... so I thought I should kind of figure out where I stand. So that was my main reason for going. I got so much stuff done, I feel a little violated LOL, my arm is still sore from the tetanus shot, and got a flu shot too.

So this was my first time getting the A1C, and I'm a 5.8. It was pretty confusing at first, because I read on one line that up to 6 is "normal range" and then the next line down on any given site says that is considered pre diabetes. From what I understand (and anyone who can correct me, PLEASE do. I am just now learning about all of this through google LOL), under 5.7 is considered a normal/healthy range and 5.7-6.4 is prediabetes with diabetes begins at 6.5.

That is definitely an eye opener, and it honestly wasn't shocking. Considering my weight issues and family history, I knew it wouldn't be an outstanding number or anything like that. So it now gives me something to work towards.

Everything else might I add was all good and in range! My cholesterol and things of that sort have dropped a lot since 2009. The weirdest thing is, I MUST be growing up (finally) LOL, because now I WANT to go back next year for my physical and "beat" my numbers. Before I was just thinking about the numbers on the scale, but now there are other numbers that are a factor.

I am very thankful for my health, especially with being as overweight as I was, and still am, and I am going to continue to fight to keep it that way. :)

Edit: After hours of reading, I do understand that it is considered pre diabetes. My blood glucose test came back beyond normal, so that part was good but I know according to the other test it is considered pre diabetes. The outstanding news is that everything I've read has said losing just 5-7% of your body weight can help reverse the problem. Since I fully intend to lose another 40-50 pounds, I am hopeful that I will be able to reverse this between now and next year.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LRSILVER 9/30/2012 2:46PM

    Great job in getting better numbers and making progress to better health!! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
EATVEGAN 9/29/2012 1:19AM

    Great report from the doctor. It should relieve your mind to know that things are not too bad and will keep on getting better. emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
BISCO_ 9/29/2012 12:33AM

    I am walking your same path with the A1C. Mine came back 5.9 and yes I'm afraid. I'm a nurse and I know the toll diabetes takes on the body. Getting this number hasn't kicked my butt enough for me to want to exercise.....:(. My doc/lab said a 6.1 would be a diabetic diagnosis... so maybe it differs a tad depending on labs.. not sure. I appreciate Losin_It4good's explanation. I started SP in the 270s.. and it's been quite a while (with inconsistent participation) on SP...and only recently I was able to break the 270s mark... it's been years of yo-yoing that 10lb range and never entering the 260s.

I know it feels awesome to be down 50lbs from that weight. emoticon

emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
TEENY_BIKINI 9/28/2012 9:16PM

    Hugs. You can do it, rock star!! Just keep on going...

I hate going to the GP, even more than the gyno or getting a mammogram. I totally get it.

Keep on being fabulous, Ms. Thang ;)

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 9/28/2012 3:39PM

    I'm so glad everything came back good for you. After going through soooooo much in my health...which is still happening...I really know what it means now to be in good health and how I took it for granted. Although my health wasn't perfect, it was WAY better than it is now. So it is such a blessing! My weight issues started around 11 years old. I swear we are so much alike. Lol. And thx for the comment on my page and blog. I aprpeciate it. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACOBSBELOVED 9/28/2012 2:26PM

    Haha! You must be growing up if you want to go back to the doctor!

I'm glad you now have something else to work towards, though. Diabetes runs in my family as well so I usually keep that fact in mind as well while I'm losing this weight. My mom has it and it is so expensive! I mean, I know it's also a disease but unfortunately the expense part speaks to me more than the health issue.

Imagine where you would be if you didn't lose this 50+ lbs? I don't know if you would go to the doctor, but who knows what kind of problems could have creeped in?

If you keep going, which I know you are, then your numbers will only get better and the risks go down, down, down. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
PRINCESSAMY 9/28/2012 1:49PM

    Very Motivating!!! I like going for my physicals. Every time I have went my numbers have drop... even if its just a little!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ADAGIO_CON_BRIO 9/28/2012 1:02PM

    .✹..✹.
. ✴ .
Wishing you a
fun and fit Weekend!!
.✹..✹.
. ✴ .
.✹..✹.
..❤
❤.✴.d
84;

I am a diabetic Type 2 and I agree with what Losin'It says in response to your HA1C number. It's not a disastrous number but it's a number that gives you a clear call for lowering it. You now know that you are in the "borderland". Losing weight, keeping an eye on your blood glucose readings, and exercise can make all the difference.

Do you have a Blood Glucose monitor? You might want to invest in one and do some tracking (this will not take a lot of time nor a lot of money) and you can get a lot of great information about how your body responds and when it responds to certain foods, stress, time of day, etc.

emoticon


Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 9/28/2012 5:19AM

    I am so glad you put you first and got these tests done. I always hated to go to the doctor. I never wanted to hear that something was wrong. Now I think I have grown up because I think it is a good idea to know where you are health-wise and then use that information to make healthy decisions for ourselves and make sure that anything that wasn't stellar gets taken care of and those things that were, stay that way.

You are doing the things that you know make a positive difference in your health! I applaud you for that. Keep it up and next year you will see even better numbers!!

You got this!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
LOSIN_IT4GOOD 9/28/2012 4:18AM

    Hi,
Your numbers are a little alarming. I work in a lab, and even though it says you are within the normal range, you are at the upper limit, and that's why the say "pre-diabetic".
The test measures the amount of glucose (sugar) that is attached to your hemoglobin (the stuff that makes up your red blood cells, and transports oxygen). Because the life of a red blood cell is 3 months, the A1C number is a measure of the average sugar over a 3 month period that is attached to your red blood cells. The average non-diabetic person usually runs around 4.0 or less. This is because they have the ability to metabolize sugar better via normal insulin release.
It might be in your best interest to follow a diabetic nutrition plan for 3 months and be rechecked. It is very likely that this can be corrected with diet. Hopefully, it can because insulin and supplies can cost hundreds of dollars a month, not to mention the problems that can result from this.
To much sugar in your blood causes it to be thicker (more syrupy) and is also the nutrient that bacteria and other organisms feed on. So sluggish blood flow can lead to vascular disease..kidney problems. Because it is a nutrient for bacteria, healing from infections can take longer and even become toxic.
I'm glad you are concerned and I wish you the best of luck.
-Jody


Report Inappropriate Comment
WEBEZE 9/28/2012 2:42AM

    Congrats on the good numbers. I went in March to have my physical after not going for 4 years and found out my blood pressure was extremely high and my cholesterol was also high. I go back in 2 weeks for my follow up and hope to have much better numbers this time. Next year your numbers should be awesome as you continue your journey to a healthier you.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LAHUDSONCHEF 9/28/2012 1:10AM

    Congrats on the good numbers! Keep up the good work, and the numbers will get even better. I'm banking on that for me, too.

Report Inappropriate Comment
DEBBY4576 9/28/2012 12:22AM

    Interesting stuff. Don't understand it all either tho. You sound further along in understanding. I've never had any of that done for diabetes.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BETHIEBOOPS 9/28/2012 12:19AM

    You go girl! Way to face your situation with such positivity! I've read that a lower carb, clean diet does AMAZING things for your blood sugar - you should totally look into that! Good luck!

Report Inappropriate Comment
DUMBBELLE84 9/28/2012 12:12AM

  I was just thinking that I should be getting this done as well. Your next year's numbers will rock, just keep it up!!

Report Inappropriate Comment


BLC 20 Challenge - NSV

Sunday, September 23, 2012

A challenge for the Biggest Loser Competition I'm in, so don't mind me. ;) emoticon

*Define The Number*
My goal weight is 180. There was a lot of thought into considering that goal, it wasn't a number I pulled out of the sky. I have not been under 200 pounds since before I was 18. So for me, a super tiny number didn't seem realistic, especially with my starting weight of 272. I felt and still feel that 180 is a place where I could be very happy and comfortable with my weight. I have recently thought about going to 170, but I figured I could decide when I get to my goal. I need a goal I can reach and feel like it is attainable. In the past I would make such lofty goals and I would never get there, but this time it isn't going to happen. The idea of hitting my goal and Onederland specifically will really make me feel like I have accomplished something great. To be able to look in the mirror and be proud of what I see will be huge for me.

*Measurements*
For right now the short term goal is to get in a pair of size 18 jeans that I had purchased. I am currently in a size 20, down from a 24, and I just might be able to squeeze into those babies by the end of BLC 20.

*Celebrate Victories*
Non scale Victories: I have had quiet a few, off the top of my head my ring that I am now able to wear after years of not being able to, fitting into clothes from 5 years ago that I couldn't fit into, going from a size 24 to a 20. Beating my fast food addiction, which was truly an addiction.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JECKIE 9/25/2012 10:10AM

    I love your NSVs! I do little dances whenever I pull something out of the closet I haven't worn in years. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
KAESEA78 9/25/2012 6:55AM

    Sometimes as I read stuff you write I feel like I wrote it myself...

Report Inappropriate Comment
5KGRANNY 9/24/2012 5:52PM

    Baby steps, Stephanie!! Shoot for 5 or 10 pound increments as mini- goals and it will go much faster and you'll feel more accomplished. I did find when I added more FMs it came off faster. Keep up the good work. What you have accomplished is staggering!!!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
PRINCESSAMY 9/24/2012 11:22AM

    You are very inspirational. Thank You.

Report Inappropriate Comment
LRSILVER 9/23/2012 3:23PM

    Excellent, Your NSV are measurable signs of the progress you have made!!
WTG

Report Inappropriate Comment
SKNYMOMWANNABE 9/23/2012 8:39AM

    Long live the NSV...As someone who's goal weight is similar to yours my advice would be to mix it up a bit and set one or two fitness goals. I find that accomplishment of weight loss is all the more sweet knowing my body can DO SOMETHING. Plus the fitness thing can be tangible, I FINISHED, even when the scale isn't!

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACOBSBELOVED 9/23/2012 2:38AM

    I love NSV's! Sometimes those are almost more exciting than seeing the numbers on the scale go down.

I think 180 is definitely attainable. It's less than 100 lbs and it doesn't seem like quite as much that way. That's how my mind works and perhaps yours works the same way. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
BETHIEBOOPS 9/23/2012 1:42AM

    Aren't these challenges great? They just force us to iterate the goals we set clearly and in measurable terms. I love how attainable your goals are!!

Report Inappropriate Comment


6 months, nsv's, and the boy... (Pretty long, proceed w/ caution)

Friday, September 21, 2012

emoticon I have been on Spark off and on since 2009. I had to let go of a lot of success/failure, and the past is the past. So this journey that I am on started on March 20th of 2012. I started the journey at 262 pounds. Not my highest weight of 272, but pretty close to it. Since March 20th, I have gotten down to 222 (as of this morning, that isn't getting officially tracked until Wednesday though, so we will see what happens and I can celebrate a total of 50 pounds down for the first time ever). 40 pounds in 6 months I feel is a respectable amount. It isn't some mind blowing amount of weight for that time frame, but I am proud just the same. Slow and steady wins the race. emoticon

So this time is outstanding because...
emoticon I have NEVER gone more than 4 months without quitting. Currently 6 Months in, I have already blown that out of the water!

emoticon I have NEVER gotten to the 50 pound lost mark EVER. 40 pounds lost, 42 maybe even 44 pounds lost, but never the 50 mark. I should be celebrating that by next Wednesday.

emoticon I have NEVER truly believed that I would get to my goal weight in the past, but this time I KNOW I'm going to get there. I can picture myself at that weight, I feel like it is so close that I can almost touch it, despite it being about 42ish pounds away.

emoticon I have NEVER thought about how I was going to maintain in the past. This time, I am already thinking of what I will do to maintain and it's basically the same thing I am doing to lose the weight. This makes me happy.

NSV of the day:
emoticon Wearing the beautiful ring my mom got me at least 7 Christmases ago. It finally fits again and I'm a happy girl.

The Boy:
For the select lovely ladies requesting more info on my status about the boy... it is still too soon to tell. I don't want to get all gushy on here just to write back in a week that my heart was stomped on are anything, but here is the overview.

*I met this boy 4 years ago, we went on one date and never went out again. However we have kept in contact and have been chatting/texting buddies 4 years later.

*He has been trying to hang out with me for 2 years, but I just wouldn't go. It was nothing to do with him, it was strictly me and my self consciousness. With that said, I will explain to you all WHY that was, under one condition. I do not want any lecturing about this issue. I don't want to hear "self esteem and self confidence has to come from within you, and it has nothing to do with weight" or "if you don't love yourself, how can anyone else love you." Those comments will be deleted on the spot, and you will see why...

Here is what it was. He was once very overweight and he isn't anymore but he is very understanding of my weight "issue". When I met him 4 years ago, I was probably like 210ish. These last 2 years, when he was trying to hang out with me I was anywhere from 250-272. I mentioned to him I had gained a LOT of weight since he last saw me, and he said he didn't care. In fact, I know he didn't care, but I held myself back because I just felt so defeated and couldn't bare the thought of facing him at an even higher weight. I said I don't need the lecturing, because I have been working a LOT on my self confidence, self esteem and my life in general. I am a different person than I was the last 2 years and while it is still a work in progress, I am doing a lot better in all those areas. I am doing my best to understand that I am a pretty groovy chick, weight issues or not... but 2 years ago I was not able to separate weight from self worth. I still have my moments, but I have come leaps and bounds in separating those two things. So that was why I really don't need to hear it LOL. emoticon

That said, getting back down in the 220's, but MORE IMPORTANT than the number on the scale was me working on my self and my self confidence, I felt that I could see him and put my best foot forward.

So needless to say I hung out with him last Wednesday and Thursday and we had a lot of fun. I have not seen him this week and I'm a little bummed, but we each work 12 hour shifts, and on top of it we are currently exact opposites. I am working 5pm to 5am and he is working 430 am to 5pm. So it's definitely not ideal. I also have set days off and he doesn't and he works a lot of over time. We also don't live super close, we live maybe 35ish miles apart and if it's a time where there is traffic it can take a very long time to get over there. His job is very physically exhausting and he is not a good texter. He's just not and he hasn't been a very good texter in the past. But he is definitely making an effort and we aren't in contact everyday yet, but he is getting better.

I just don't want to get my hopes up, because it's a weird situation. It's hard because I feel like I've known him so long, and while it's partially true, it's still a very different situation because we only truly hung out that once many years ago, so it's still "new" in that regards.

Anyways, I am really opening up here and putting myself out there, and hopefully this won't have to be followed up with a blog where I get my heart clobbered. *Fingers crossed*

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KASTASTROPHY 9/24/2012 9:06AM

    BIG HUGS!!!! I understand 100% of this post and i'm right there learning to be a confident woman instead of just being a just being a thin person!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
THESHELBSTER 9/23/2012 11:23AM

    I am so freaking proud of you. You are awesome!

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHICAT63 9/22/2012 6:53AM

    Ok, foremost you are to be very proud of yourself. You are doing SUPER on all fronts that being said I know firsthand how shifts are on a relationship so you do what is best for you ! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JACOBSBELOVED 9/21/2012 11:31PM

    AMAZING!!!!! I'm so happy for you!!!! You are so close to being in the 2teens now too!!! Onederland is so very, very close!

Report Inappropriate Comment
_MOBII_ 9/21/2012 10:58PM

    How exciting! So many reasons for your heart to be pitter pattering!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEATHERFREE 9/21/2012 10:49PM

    Dude your weight loss is going amazing! You have stuck in there so much better than some of us! Just think about that! Like you say 40 pounds isn't much in six months but it truly is, I've had way more downs than ups on this journey and Ive only lost 25 pounds since december. As for the "boy" how did I miss this new boy?! Did you blog about a date and I didnt know or what? Im confused! lol

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 9/21/2012 10:12PM

    First off congrats on the weight loss! That is great! I swear we are a lot alike. I too have not made it to my goal or even the 50lb mark. I got to 41lbs lost back in 2001 then I managed to gain it all back & then some! So I KNOW this is a great victory for you! Yay! I also understand not wanting to meet someone when you feel self conscious about weight. Been there, done that. I also know the whole thing you're talking about as far as self love and acceptance comes from within and all that. I am still working on separating self image from self worth. I have always had a hard time with it and feel it is the root of my weight problems. So I am now working on myself inwardly in a way I never have before. As far as 'the boy', just enjoy it girl! Don't worry about posting then having to write if it didn't work out or whatever. Have we not all experienced that? And it could very well go in the other direction! And right now, you like the guy...so you wanna talk about it. That's how we are as women. :) I hope everything goes the way you want it to, AND as far as your weight loss...I know you're gonna make your goal this time too. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
DUMBBELLE84 9/21/2012 2:45PM

  Very exciting stuff! You're doing just amazing, can't wait to see what's in store for you!

Report Inappropriate Comment
IRONBLOSSOM 9/21/2012 2:12PM

    40 pounds in 6 months is AMAZING!! Congrats!! I've lost 1/2 that! That is incredible, keep up the fabulous work!

And good luck with the boy, I know what you mean about not wanting to jump into things AND what you mean about not wanting to see someone when you feel so fat, I used to run around town and avoid my past haunts for fear of seeing someone I knew when I was so much thinner.

We can BOTH get back to a great place where that is no longer a concern!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ARCHIMEDESII 9/21/2012 1:51PM

    Congratulations on losing 50 pounds !! Totally emoticon !!


emoticon emoticon emoticon

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LRSILVER 9/21/2012 1:49PM

    I am so happy for you 50 pounds down. That is amazing. I am so happy to hear there is a boy. He clearly likes you for yourself, and I am glad that you are more confident now and able to spend time with him.

So proud that you are on my BLC team. Keep it up you are amazing.

((Hugs))

Report Inappropriate Comment
JECKIE 9/21/2012 1:44PM

    You have SO much to be proud of! I'm certainly proud of you!

and 40 pounds in 6 months? OUT OF THIS WORLD! Seriously, you may not see it as super fast, but some of us do. Keep up the amazing efforts. I haven't known you long and I already know you're an awesome chick! :)

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
EMMAEKAY 9/21/2012 11:48AM

    You are doing SO well! And the greatest thing is that you're in TOTAL control of every emotion this time. You know exactly what you want and how to get there! I'm so proud of you, and I hope you are just BEAMING today.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PRINCESSAMY 9/21/2012 11:38AM

    emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LYNNIERN 9/21/2012 9:33AM

    Excellent, excellent blog. Can't wait to hear about you hitting that 50 lb goal. emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KK10TM 9/21/2012 8:59AM

    Thank you for sharing this. I'm excited for you. I'm 11 pounds away from 50 pounds lost. We can do this! :))

Report Inappropriate Comment
ZELDABEE 9/21/2012 8:00AM

    Im reading this at te doctors office but I couldn't wait to comment til I get home so here hoping that my phone will post this...I am so unbelievably proud of you! Your doing so great and I absolutely know that you will reach your goals even though I dont think you could make me any prouder. As for the boy, new relationships whether you've know the person a long time or not are confusing, when David and i first started dating i wished that i was a mind reader so i could know what he was thinking.. Sometimes i still feel that way lol i totally get why you don't want to be lectured, we've heard it all before haven't we? Im like high school excited for you though, ya know ... That hold hands, jump up and down while squealling like on an episode of blossom kind of excited.. Haha what ever happens im so happy your happy.

Report Inappropriate Comment
PUNKY100 9/21/2012 6:26AM

    Oh gosh I can't wait until Wednesday so that you can see that 50 on the scale officially!!! So many NSVs!!! :-D You are doing so awesome this time, I have no doubt that you will reach that goal weight, one pound at a time.

You do realize too that when that scale says 50 next week, we will require new pics. Just saying lol

After my drama with boy blogs, I know why you don't want to say too much too early. I wasn't really embarrassed to post my heart broken blog, I was really just more sad than anything else. I'm SO hoping this is different, and it sounds like he really likes you!!! I don't know how you even fit the time in last week to see him if you're working opposite 12 hour schedules...that's crazy!

I'm so proud of you and so excited, both about the weight loss and about the boy hehe. I can't wait to hear good things about both! :-D

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 9/21/2012 6:04AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon I SAID... emoticon emoticon on the 50 pounds GONE!!! You did it and the rest will be gone soon too!

"self esteem and self confidence has to come from within you, and it has nothing to do with weight" or "if you don't love yourself, how can anyone else love you." This is a test...it is only a test! l just wanted to see if you were going to delete my comment! lol You KNOW I wouldn't tell you this crap. You are doing so well and learning what is important and I think your self-esteem is getting higher.

emoticon on sticking with it for 6 months. That is dedication! That is perseverance!

emoticon for looking into the future and thinking ahead to what you are going to do to maintain your weight loss. That tells me that you will not only get there but that you will maintain it!

emoticon emoticon on being able to wear the ring! That is great. I am working on being able to wear my wedding ring again!

& I don't think I need to say it because we have been talking about it...I am so glad that you are living your life! LIVE IT girl!

emoticon to me for finally writing a long comment on one of your blogs! lol

Much love

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
KAESEA78 9/21/2012 6:01AM

    Steph- Are rings your fave piece of jewelry too? They are mine!!! Actually the only kind I wear. I don't even wear a watch. No necklaces, bracelets, earrings...just rings!

Report Inappropriate Comment
BETHIEBOOPS 9/21/2012 5:35AM

    GAH! EEEEEE!!! *jumps up and down with glee*

I feel like this post needs a list:

1. I AM SOOOO EXCITED FOR YOUR 50 LBS DOWN CELEBRATION! The caps are totally necessary because OHMYGOSH YOU DID IT! You went where you haven't been before and you are STILL GOING BOLDLY!

2. I am SOOOO excited about boy stories! and I am so hoping that your heart remains in tact and that there is no follow up broken heart blog. But I feel very blessed to be able to follow your journey through ups and downs. And this is definately an UP!

3. I know sometimes I am hard on you about self esteem, and I am sorry. I just adore you SO much and can see SO much potential in you that I wish that I can swap vision goggles with you so you can see it too. Never ever ever have I ever had ill intentions or wanted you to feel bad about it. I am sorry if I ever have made you feel icky about it.

BUT I am so proud of the fact that you can see what a GREAT person you are, no matter your size. And I am so so so glad you bit the bullet and went and saw the boy. It must have been awesome to be reunited with an old friend! I am sooo glad for you! The difference is where we are going - not in what we were- right?

4. I am so proud of you for all the internal work you are doing- I feel so much less alone - because this has been the hardest part of this whole journey by far! Damn self-esteem and all the lies we tell ourselves!

5. Yay "new" rings! Rings are my favourite pieces of jewellery!

I am just so glad we are connected because your story is just AWESOME! Goal weight here you come!!!

Report Inappropriate Comment
KAESEA78 9/21/2012 5:03AM

    I totally relate to the self worth issues and I am glad to hear that you are working thru them. I am proud of you and 40 and/or 50 pounds in 6 months is awesome!!! I think you are pretty groovy!! Hopefully things work out the way you would like, you def deserve it!! Keep us posted

Report Inappropriate Comment
GHOSTFLAMES 9/21/2012 4:50AM

    YOU ARE DOING GREAT KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK. ONE DAY AT A TIME WE WILL DO THIS. emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon WE AQRE ALL HERE FOR YOU FI YOU NEED ANYTHING AT ALL JUST ASK,KEEP TRACKING YOUR FOOD AND FITNESS DAILY TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE.

Report Inappropriate Comment


Life isn't always puppies and rainbows...

Tuesday, September 18, 2012



One of my favorite thing to say when things are going just beyond great is "puppies and rainbows"... unicorns and glitter is pretty awesome too, but my go to phrase is puppies and rainbows.

I don't know if there is something in the air, because I have had a few Spark Friends who were also not feeling like themselves and just not feeling puppies and rainbows when it comes to this whole journey right now. For me, there is nothing truly wrong...I just feel a little off. I know a large part of it is contributed to my work week this week and not getting enough sleep. I will finally get to sleep in tomorrow because I go into work at a later time and I really think that will help me out a lot.

I just want everyone who is feeling less than super dooper right now to remember to hang in there, and that our actions when we feel like we DON'T want to do this are the most important actions of all. When we are feeling great, and WANTING to eat right and exercise that is the easy part. But with the easy always comes the hard, and doing the right thing even when we don't feel like it is what is going to separate the winners from the losers. emoticon





  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHRISKENANDKIDS 9/18/2012 9:40PM

    Great blog, and so true! Thanks for sharing!

Report Inappropriate Comment
SHRINK_U 9/18/2012 9:19PM

    You are so right.. it does seem that many of us Sparkers are feeling down lately. I agree with you completely.. Nice blog!

Report Inappropriate Comment
ADAGIO_CON_BRIO 9/18/2012 5:38PM

    Thank you for the slogans and the rumination. For me it would be kittens and kisses! Especially fish-flavored kisses from kittens.
Yes, ma'am, it is so important to remember not to quit even when the puppies and kittens are not around to console us! emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
LIBELULITA 9/18/2012 5:02PM

    Agreed!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
GEMINIGEM6 9/18/2012 4:17PM

    This is so true! Thanks for posting this. I needed to hear that. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
PRINCESSAMY 9/18/2012 2:09PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
ADARKARA 9/18/2012 2:05PM

    You know, it DOES seem to me like a lot of people are struggling right now. Maybe it's the change in seasons.

Report Inappropriate Comment
EMMAEKAY 9/18/2012 1:23PM

    Awesome reminder! Thanks for the cute post. :)

Report Inappropriate Comment
PUNKY100 9/18/2012 12:41PM

    Puppies and rainbows!!! Rainbow puppies?!?! That sounds awesome too! :-D

I'm definitely feeling much more rainbow puppies today than this last weekend, and I love reading blogs like this to get my mood back up again. I am determined to be a winner this time around, and no matter how many slip ups I have, I'm going to get there. Just like you will. :-D

I have noticed that lately too, it seems like when I'm having a rough time, other people are too. It's strange and comforting at the same time to know I'm not alone, but at the same time I am very grateful to have friends who are NOT having a hard time to pick me back up. You rock! :-D

Report Inappropriate Comment
BETHIEBOOPS 9/18/2012 11:44AM

    You are 100% right! When it's tough- that's when it counts!

I have figured out where my emotions are coming from, but need some time before I "come out" about it. :) Until then, I'm trying to be kind to myself and appreciate what I have been given :) Thanks for the reminder dear one!

Report Inappropriate Comment
STARSUB99 9/18/2012 10:17AM

    I am feeling a bit off too...... thanks for the words of encouragement - we gotta keep going in the right direction - one good decision at a time!
You are doing great!
emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
MAHGRET 9/18/2012 9:40AM

    Great attitude, thanks for sharing. I have to avoid letting the plan slide because things in other parts of my life are not going great, that will start a downward spiral.

Report Inappropriate Comment
BLUEFAIRYTALE 9/18/2012 9:32AM

  Thank you for this wonderful message. It boosted my spirits. emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
JECKIE 9/18/2012 7:29AM

    You are so right! It's those challenging times that really test our commitment to ourselves!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
OLIVIANIGHT 9/18/2012 5:29AM

    Thanks for sharing : )

Report Inappropriate Comment
TWEETYKC00 9/18/2012 5:16AM

    I hope everything can be puppies and rainbows for you today!

Report Inappropriate Comment
HEATHERFREE 9/18/2012 2:32AM

    Thanks!

Report Inappropriate Comment
IMSOOZEEQ 9/18/2012 1:18AM

    You got it right my friend! You always seem to hit the nail on the head! There are definitely no puppies or rainbows here but I am hanging on and pushing! Okay don't ask how I can hang and push at the same time! lol I got skills okaaaay!

emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
NEWANDHEALTHY13 9/18/2012 1:17AM

  emoticon emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment
STUFFNEARTABOR 9/18/2012 1:16AM

    We all have 'off' days - just know that the 'on' days are coming too.

Report Inappropriate Comment
CHIBIKARATE 9/18/2012 1:15AM

    You can do it good luck emoticon

Report Inappropriate Comment


First Page  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 Last Page