STEPH-KNEE   80,916
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June Goals... For Real-sies This Time! :D

Friday, June 01, 2012

I have always been so inspired by those people that blog at the beginning of a month with a list of goals, no matter how big or small. Then at the end of the month, actually come back and say whether or not those goals have been met. I may have done it back in 2010 when I was on here, but never actually followed through. I am hoping that June 2012, I can actually set out and DO what I want to accomplish. You guys really hold me accountable, and I love that. So at the end of this month, I will revisit this list, and blog about what is met and what isn't. I am hoping this keeps the fire lit under my butt to make June a good month. I have been doing pretty good food wise, but the exercise has been so inconsistent, so that is a big focus for me.

emoticon Drink 8 glasses of water each day. emoticon
emoticon Walk 4 miles per week. emoticon
emoticon Do 60 minutes cardio per week. emoticon
emoticon Do 10 minutes of strength training 3x/week emoticon
emoticon Track everything I eat no matter how bad. emoticon
emoticonLose 8 pounds by the end of June. (240.5) emoticon

I have been walking pretty consistently, but not done any strength training and my cardio aside from the walking is super in consistent. I'm hoping to look back at the end of the month just to prove to myself I can actually do this. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BROWNEYES519 6/2/2012 12:16PM

    Great Goals!!! You can do it! emoticon

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ZELDABEE 6/1/2012 9:09PM

    Those are some awesome goals and you can totally do it! I may have to borrow some!

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    Those are totally reachable goals! You can do this!!

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GRACEMCC45 6/1/2012 12:31PM

    You know which of these goals are the best?

The action goals! The things that you force yourself to achieve! Losing a certain amount of weight is more an outcome of those goals than an actual goal itself. 8lbs in a month would be awesome, but it can be hard, and I would be really sad if you got discouraged if you don't quite make it. Especially if you attain all the other ones - because those are the most important.

You will do awesome!!

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TASNIM81 6/1/2012 4:21AM

    Great goals! emoticon emoticon

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Almost Had A Morning Binge Just Now...

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

So it's technically "night" for me even though it's 5:37 am. I get off work at 5am, I work 12 hours, and I was in my calorie range for today. I get home and I'm starving. In the past this could be eating any possible left overs, well technically inhaling them while standing in front an open fridge. Or making something eat, still feeling "hungry" and making something else. This could add up to 100's of calories. The other alternative was literally to stop at a fast food joint on the way home and easily eat a days worth of calories after I'd probably already eaten 2000 for the day.

I came home I felt so hungry, I knew it was legitimate hunger as I had already had plenty of water. I only have 85 calories left for the day (since it's the end of mine)... I almost thought screw it, I can't have anything for 85 calories, then I found myself reasoning in my head... well you walked a mile today you had to burn a few calories, so you can eat more than that. On and on. 85 calories isn't even enough for one of my fiber one brownies (90 cals)... that would have even been fine. I am not going to go crazy about being 5 calories over. Then I decided I really wanted some string cheese, I didn't have any, but settled on two pieces of thin colby jack cheese that I did have. 80 calories for the whole thing, about to track it and head to bed.

I just have to say if it wasn't for Spark and you awesome people, I would be standing in front of the fridge right now inhaling anything I could get my hands on. I am so thankful to all of you! :D emoticon

Edit: And sorry to anyone who is tired of hearing about my night shift/12 hour shifts, I try and write it as if for someone who knows nothing about me... but if anyone has read more than just this one I didn't want you to think I was beating a dead horse LOL! :D ;)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THESHELBSTER 5/31/2012 12:38PM

    So proud of you. You are awesome. I go over my tracking range A LOT. A nd by hundreds. Probably why I am the same weight I was 8 months ago. Ha! So good on you. You are doing a lot better than I am right now with tracking your cals and sticking to it. I am so very proud of you!

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DEBADEAU 5/30/2012 5:42PM

    Gd it, I'm so tired of hearing about your night shifts! Just kidding! I'm glad you stand in front of the fridge and cease inhale. My fridge is full of health food so I wouldn't get very far if I did that, I dunno bout you! Haha!

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DIXIEDOLL87 5/29/2012 11:34AM

    I have been there! it's so easy to reason with yourself and tell yourself "oh its not that bad" or "I will try again tomorrow" but then tomorrow never comes. Good for you!! Success is a bunch of small steps that add up to the finish line!

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GRACEMCC45 5/29/2012 11:23AM

    You did awesome!

Remember too - fruit and veggies are low cal options when you are stuck at the end of the day!

I count from midnight to midnight for all my tracking days, that way I always have some leeway in the mornings coming off nights.

Great job!!

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BOBCATGIRL76 5/29/2012 8:48AM

    emoticon I too feel accountable to all my Spark Friends when I feel like bingeing. Glad you beat the fridge!

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MYBULLDOGS 5/29/2012 8:45AM


emoticon on staying strong

sister lost 93 pounds by walking 15000 steps a day at age 63.

i lost 44 pounds by giving up grain and sugary products


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GUCCI9300 5/29/2012 8:44AM

    emoticon ~~ You kicked that fridge's butt!!!! You go girl!! emoticon

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"Have you lost weight?" and The Walk Of Shame...

Friday, May 25, 2012

I went to get my eyebrows done today because I have to attend a wedding on Sunday, and I haven't seen my "eyebrow lady" in a while and she said "wow, have you lost weight?" I said "a little, but not enough", which is true lol. She isn't one of those people that says that all the time, so maybe it was sincere. I hate people who say it to you whenever they see you (if they are one of the people you see once in a while)... "oh have you lost weight", it's almost like the only compliment they can think of to give an overweight person. So annoying. Anyways, I was happy about the comment from her, but then... DUN DUN DUN.

I was walking around Target doing my shopping, and I saw a girl that I went to middle school with. I immediately looked down and to the side, and spent the rest of the time dodging her. First of all she looks exactly the same, her hair is even the same, and skinny just like she was back then. Now of course, I was not skinny by any means in middle school, but I definitely have at least 100 plus pounds hanging off me now. The sad part is, I have a lot of things to be proud of. I know everyone has something that they aren't 100% thrilled with, but the weight made me terrified of her recognizing me. It's weird because in other aspects of my life I am very proud of what I have accomplished. At the age of 26 I own my own home, I have a great job that is a career that I plan to stay at until I retire, and I have great friends and family. But it was like the embarrassment of this weight trumps all that I guess. I know it shouldn't be that way, but I kind of feel like "you've accomplished this and that, but you are still fat but who cares."

I think it was just an eye opener that I have a long way to go with the weight loss, but it is something that I really want. Not even so I won't have to be afraid of running into people, but just so I can feel proud of all aspects of my life, including my weight loss.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THESHELBSTER 5/26/2012 10:21PM

    You have accomplished so much. Weight can come and go but character, attitude, skills, brains, these are all things that are lifetime characteristics for you. You have come far and above many people your age. You have lost weight and gained it like we all have. But it has made you only stronger. My best friend weighs about 130 lbs and she eats like a horse. She mowed down about 1200 calories worth of cookies right in front of me without blinking an eye. But you know what? She is not happy most of the time. That girl you saw could be miserable regardless of her hair and her skinny jeans. I am learning that happiness does not come from a number on the scale. I am proud of you and feel blessed to have you as a friend.

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    You sound exactly like me. I love my job and own my house, but I didn't have a strong bond with many people in high school. If she was just some chick the 2 minutes she saw you won't make an impact, she doesn't know about all the wonderful things you have done since the last time she saw you, and if she doesn't actually stop and talk to you she never will.

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GRACEMCC45 5/25/2012 11:11PM

    What a wonderful feeling from your eyebrow lady!

As for the chick from middle school, I have a few things to ask you:
1) Does she have any bearing in your life whatsoever?
2) Do you feel like you need her validation, although it appears you have not had any semblance of a relationship in many years?
3) How are your accomplishments/failures of any concern to her? Do they impact her life in any way?

If your answer to any of these questions is "no", then you can start to decide whose opinions and ideas you are going to let alter your behaviours. Hold your head up high, don't shy away! You have made amazing progress and deserve to sache through Target like the super amazing chicka you are!

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Weight Loss Vases and Cravings...

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

So I'm way late on the weight loss vases, but better late than never right? To be quite honest with you I'm a pretty lazy person (it's a wonder I'm overweight huh? *giggles*;) ), so I did a trial run with vases I had around the house to see if I would actually continue to move the marbles. I know, how sad is that? But I wasn't sure if it was something I thought was great for the moment and would be over in a week. So I took the plunge today and actually bought some stickers and the vases. I already had the little purple and pink hearts which I love, today I get big clear ones to represent the 10 pound marks and and the beautiful huge pink one for goal. Whoever had the idea to get a special gem for your goal is a genius btw. :)

So there we have it, 22 pounds down from my highest, and 70 pounds to get to 180. I really think I'd feel great at 180, but I am also torn because I know this is still in the overweight BMI. I was watching Weight Of The Nation last night per a recommendation from a fellow sparkie, and physically seeing how being in that category can affect so many things health wise it really made me rethink it. For my height, the very highest end of the healthy BMI would be 160 pounds, but I just don't know if that is for me. I guess we'll see. I think I should focus on getting out of the 200's before I burden myself with such decisions. ;)

And Cravings, are really testing my nerves, but I managed to satisfy a craving with not too many calories. Jack In The Box has a new Jr. Jack, which I added the cheese to, however I did not eat the bun or any sauce, just the patty, cheese, onion, pickle and tomato, along with their value fry. I've come a long way since a double cheeseburger, large fries, and tacos on the side etc etc. It's funny because the thing I was craving as far as the burger is concerned was the actual patty, so why throw all those calories away for the bun and sauces? So silly.

Hope everyone is having a great week! :D emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CLHENDY1 5/24/2012 7:58AM

    I use them too! They really are a big motivator!! You're doing great! CONGRATS!!!

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CALLIKIA 5/23/2012 5:21PM

    I think I'd break my jars if I tried that right now (I'm back and forth on this stupid plateau and I can't imagine it'd feel good to move a marble and then move it back day in and day out...). Looks cool though, and I hope it keeps you motivated (and away from cravings! ;) )!

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DEBADEAU 5/23/2012 2:07PM

    I made those a few weeks ago, moved them once, stopped haha. Good thing I got the supplies @ the dollar store so I didn't feel so bad. I think it's because I bought the jars too big and they look weird. I Like yours!

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CHICAT63 5/23/2012 12:43PM

    Your jars are great !!!!! Every 10 pounds you will be closer to your goal. Excellent for your craving, you did GOOD !

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GRACEMCC45 5/23/2012 7:18AM

    Those jars are awesome! Wouldn't last an hour in my house with my kitties, but visual prompters are always an awesome choice!

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KAESEA78 5/23/2012 6:57AM

    I also have some goal jars like these and didn't do very good about moving them. I didn't get any special ones for goal though and maybe I should. I drew these goal meters (my profile pic). I really like them. Each one represents 10 pounds. I think you did awesome to realize the exact thing you were craving as opposed to saying you were craving Jack in the box in general. WAY TO GO!!!

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Finally Excited About #'s Not On The Scale

Monday, May 21, 2012

For me, weight loss has always been about one number, and one number only, the number on the dreaded scale. If it didn't move as fast as I felt it should, or heaven forbid went up a pound or 2, I would lose all motivation. But for the first time I see myself fascinated with other numbers. Like my spark points, my calorie and fat count on the nutrition tracker, and the fitness tracker. With the exception of the last couple weeks, I haven't exercised in an incredibly long time, 80% laziness and 20% fear.

I have arthritis in both my knees, and too much exercise or not even too much, it's more the intensity and what not can hurt my knees and they wind up getting inflamed, and this can last for months. The last time it happened I needed cortisone shots in each knee just to be able to walk, and that was over 6 weeks after it was inflamed. So for me high impact just isn't going to happen. On top of that, I fell in April of 2011, broke my ankle and my leg. I now have a plate in my leg, and two screws in my ankle. Definitely not fun, you can still feel a stiffness and my range of motion will never be the same. So there is a legit sense of fear of hurting myself further. But on the flip side of that there is still no excuse for me to sit around and do absolutely nothing. I was using the pool in the condo to help my knees when they were inflamed, but I'm not a big fan of being out in the pool alone, it's a self confidence/swimsuit issue at this point. If my brother comes over and goes with me then I'll do it, but haven't done that in a while. But I am loving getting back into my walking DVD's. I love Leslie Sansone. It is easy on my knees and I like the option of 1, 2, or 3 miles (for now) so I can work my way up. I am also loving my WII and my new WII games. So much fun.

I've never paid much attention to my Spark Points, but all of a sudden I find myself obsessed. I have been on Spark for years, and at one point lost 40 pounds, but gained most of it back. I thought about clearing out the points and starting fresh, but I feel like my struggles and the back and forth is all a part of this journey. Now I find myself reading articles and all those little extra things to get the points. It's almost like a game in itself. Plus I'm trying to keep up my spark streak for walking 4 miles a week, and hope to up the mileage in the future. I think not being so obsessed with the scale is really helping me stay on track, because it's been hovering around 250 for a little while now. That would normally cause me to throw in the towel, but I can't ruin my streak now can I? ;)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DEBADEAU 5/22/2012 1:18PM

    Keep it up! Non scale victories are well... victorious!

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Keep up the GREAT work!!!

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