Wednesday, November 03, 2010
The outpouring of love and support here on Spark is unbelievable. I happen to think that I have the BEST SparkFriends on this site. How I got to be so lucky I'll never question. I am so thankful for all of the words of awesome encouragement and the outpouring of support and prayer I've received over the last few days. It's overwhelming and an incredibly touching. If having incredible people surrounding you makes you rich, then I am the richest person in the world.
I'm going to try to get on and Spark a little each day until I feel up to par. I still feel a little yucky but I'm sure the pain in my butt illness is on its way down the road. So, before you know it, you'll be seeing my face on your pages with a smart-aleck comment and a hug in no time. But I want to thank everyone who has blessed me with their words, the Goodies, the comments, the uplifting spirit of love that you all have given me. I will do my best to thank you individually in time but wanted you all to know right now that it has made me feel so happy to know that I am part of the greatest circle of pals in the world. You can't get that anywhere else.
So, once I get myself together, I will blog and tell you how much "trouble" my daughter and I got into while she was home last weekend! We had a blast and we're already making plans to tear up the town when she gets home in another few short weeks from now.
God bless you ALL, dear friends. Each and every one of you has this big place in my heart. If I could give you all a big hug in person, I so would.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
It just keeps getting better and better these days! I am so excited that Breanna is coming home for the weekend and I could absolutely burst! I've been busy today cleaning house, doing laundry, making sure the refrigerator is full of her favorite foods and putting cool posters up on her wall. But I received an email from her just a little bit ago that just made me go over the top. Recently, she has been working on an essay for her English class and it could be a topic of her choice. She chose the topic of how the prison system's rehabilitation efforts aren't very effective according to the high re-entry rates. I've noticed the trend in her thinking for the last two years concerning the criminal law system and I was astonished, yet again, at the clarity of thought she has given to this subject.
But the last line of her email had me jumping excitedly from my chair....
"I AM REALLY thinking about going for a criminal justice degree, Mom. I'm starting it in Spring Quarter." OH! The Powers that Be HAVE to be feeling the waves of joy off of my freakin' aura right now! I think this is IT!! A mom just KNOWS, ya know??
She's always been interested in criminal law. Maybe it all started when she was nine-years old and we received her school pictures in the neat little white envelope they always come in. We had ordered quite a bit but we had so many family members who wanted a picture of her, Brian and I decided to take them to Zip Systems to get copies made. She stomped her little foot down and said, "YOU CAN'T DO THAT!" After Brian and I looked at one another in surprise, I asked her why NOT. She said, "BECAUSE, Mom, it's against the law to do that and you have to order more from the SCHOOL! That's robbery!" LOL! (Needless to say we DID get more from the school and decided not to pursue our desire to be fugitives from the law.)
She has told me recently that college has shown her more and more every day what she wants out of her life. She wants to do well, to make the Dean's List, to excel beyond excelling. She took a walk on the bike path at OU a few weeks ago, amidst the campus parties and the loud whoops of evening campus life. She said she saw a lady, strolling peacefully, walking her dog, and it struck a nerve in her. She told me, "Mom, I want that. I want to know at the end of every day that I have helped someone, that I have touched a life, and maybe even changed a life for the good. I want a simple life for myself. Just a simple, calm and peaceful life."
Oh, my dear sweet girl, that's what I want for you, too. And if I know my daughter like I think I do, that's exactly what she's going to do for herself.
I've never been more proud!
Sunday, October 24, 2010
I have so many things going on in my head right now. I don't know where to begin. This weekend was great. My husband and I went out to dinner today to celebrate our anniversary and we picked out a new mirror for our bathroom. I got started on the bathroom floor and so far it's looking pretty spiffy, if I say so myself! And I'm really excited because my daughter is coming home next weekend for three days, too. It will be the first time since leaving for Ohio University that she's been back home. She said she wanted mashed potatoes. I asked her what she wanted with them and she said she didn't care, she just wanted those. Apparently campus food isn't all it's cracked up to be, especially when you work in the dining hall and you see how the food is prepared!
Halloween has me fighting back the tears, though. Next weekend would have been when my brother Steve would have transformed his big garage into his annual Halloween Haunted House Bash for the neighborhood kids. He always put his whole heart into the occasion and it rivaled any other haunted house in town. He never charged money for the event either. Everything came out of his pocket, the decorations, the monsters, the extraordinary food, just so the local kids would have a place to go that evening instead of out-and-about causing trouble. He had such a soft heart for them. The kids absolutely adored him. I don't know who had the most fun...Steve getting it ready or the kids who came. And Steve was actually a big kid at heart. Christmas was the same way for him. Each year he would pick a family in need and buy them Christmas. The tree, the dinner, the presents, the works. It hurts so badly that there is a family out there who will not experience the love and extraordinary giving of my brother this year. My heart is in misery because HIS heart gave out on him January 2nd of this year. One minute he was gathering the brush to burn and fifteen minutes later he was gone. Oh, how I miss him! The whole community misses him! There has actually been a couple of times over the past few days I've had to excuse myself and go to the bathroom and cry. It all just seems so surreal, like a really bad movie that leaves you scratching your head in disbelief and sorrow.
I ran into my sister-in-law Rita, Steve's wife of 35 years, at Walmart the other day. I saw her sitting at the pharmacy. When I approached her, her face lit up and she stood with arms outstretched ready to give me a hug. She's been battling walking pneumonia. She is not the same woman. The twinkle is gone from her eyes and has been replaced with such deep sorrow. I don't think I've prayed as hard for anything that night...I asked God to give her some sort of comfort, some kind of understanding as to why things happen the way they do. Then I asked the same thing for myself because I don't understand either.
As I looked at Brian's face over dinner today, I wanted to reach across the table and stroke his cheek. It was all I could do to wait until we were in the car when I could lay my head on his chest, listening to the thumping of his heart, and wrap my arm around him on the way home. He quietly asked me what was wrong and I couldn't speak, just hold him tighter. Sensing that I couldn't talk, he firmly held me and said, "It's alright. I know you love me. I love you, too." I think he knows where my mind has been as of late.
I am blessed to have the love of my life today. I am SO blessed. But my heart is breaking for the ones who have lost theirs.
Please tell your husband or wife how much you love them today. And hold them close. Hold them really really close, okay?
Friday, October 22, 2010
I THINK I am doing okay. Well, except for the occasional slip-up here and there of a bite of ice cream, I'm eating pretty well and hiking. But, dang, it's getting cold and forcing myself out the door on mornings like this just sucks. And I don't mean it bites, I mean it REALLY SUCKS. I've grown accustomed to those dirt poundings during the spring and summer but I can't do the 30-degree grindage. I'm not sure if it's just my general dislike of cold weather or the fact that Lupus makes my joints very aware of the temperatures around me, but I'm telling you, I JUST DON'T LIKE IT. My frozen joints burn to the point of pain and I'm the type of person if it hurts the WRONG way I won't do it. So, I have to find something that's indoors, in the warmth, that's equivalent to the "good" burn of the hike and get rocking with it.
Treadmill, you say?? Aw, that son-of-a-gun and I have an understanding. The Dread-Mill has tasted the feel of my wrath and he's bitten off a piece of my butt on several occasions. Nooo, don't call me a wimp because it's not like that. I've used him while watching t.v., used him while staring out my patio doors, pretended that he was the outside turf while I inclined him but he's not as good as the real thing. It appears that I am going to have to cut back on my calorie intake in order to not gain while I am using him this winter because he just doesn't give me the push or the drive that I've become accustomed to on my rolling outside terrain.
Ab Lounger, check. Zumba video, check. Stationary bike, check. Sigh. And my occasional bite of ice cream is going to have to bite the dust because I just can't afford it right now. Bring with that the impending Thanksgiving dinner and the Christmas goodies and I can't help but feel a little depressed with the approaching struggles that are sure to ensue. Warrior spirit, check?
Wait a minute...I know I put it somewhere.
I've asked Brian to give me the exercise regimen that they used in the Marine Corps and after about 40 "Hello Dollies" I was crawling towards his feet begging for mercy. Perhaps THAT is the ticket. I will use my Old Man to give me the edge that I feel I desperately need right now. I can do without his "C'MON PRIVATE, gimme ten more!" because I think he's lovin' the power play but if it keeps the muffin tops and banana rolls at bay, I'll tell Dolly hello every day of the week and twice on Sunday. Along with the Cherry Pickers, I'm probably biting off a piece of butt more than I can chew. The In-Place Double Time made me have thoughts of throwing Brian in the wood chipper so he and I will not go there again....but all-in-all, I think my husband may be the key to a possible replacement until Springtime sets in again.
Hi, Dolly, it's nice to meet you, girl. At least for now, anyways.
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