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Day One: Pushing Forward

Thursday, September 16, 2010

It's pretty amazing what a few weeks of bad eating can do to your body. I went for broke, throwing good sense and what I knew was best for me to the wind while planning for Breanna's departure to college these last few weeks. Maybe I should say "MONTH" because I have been "sneaking" things for quite awhile now. I had several "duh" moments when I was just too tired to hike and my energy levels starting rolling in the ditch. Instead of pushing through or realizing that junk-in equals junk-out, I allowed myself to think, "I'm going back to the house, I'm not feeling well, maybe it's the Lupus affecting me and I need rest." Excuses, excuses, excuses. I gave myself a verbal beat-down yesterday, I cursed at the scale, I cursed at myself and allowed the "pity me!" monster to take me hostage. Not only did I gain ten pounds of FAT, I gained ten pounds of emotional loathing and a bad attitude.

Today I am still feeling pretty rotten physically. To put it mildly, I feel like I've been chewed up by a wood chipper...twice. My stomach burns, my head hurts and my bones and muscles feel like sludge. It is compounded by the fact that it is raining and this type of weather is rough for my auto-immune disorder. The verbal self-lashing has made me realize that I can be pretty cruel towards myself. I wouldn't be that mean with anyone else...so why was I so mean with ME?? Which takes me back to why I decided to abuse my body in the first place. Why did I slide down that slippery slope of temptation when I KNEW where it would lead? I know....we all do it. I know we are all capable of "back-sliding" and I wouldn't be angry at anyone else who lost their way. After all, we are only human, we are creatures of habit and sometimes we lose our way.

I snapped on my pedometer this morning and groaned. This is where my struggle now lies. Not only am I dealing with the burden of losing this weight, to make this body healthy again, I am dealing with this physical ill feeling. I am trying to find a way to push through it. I have this inner dialogue that continues to resonate in my mind that goes something like this:

"Get over it, Michelle. You screwed up. Now fix it."
"I'm too tired to fix it. There are so many more IMPORTANT things to be upset about, that are more important than my WEIGHT. And I'm just SOO tired!"
"Yeah? Well if you don't knock your crap off now, you're not going to be around to help resolve these situations that are going on in your life. Remember your promise to your brother!"

And it hit me last night...if something goes wrong with me, it affects everybody. Brian told me last night that if I didn't get busy and get healthy again, he was going to be mad. He said he didn't care about my weight, he just cared about my HEALTH. He EVEN said, "You could weigh 300 pounds and I would still love you, kiss you, think you were beautiful. But if you're sick and something happens to you, I'm going to be %$@&! Because this is in your control. WE NEED YOU. This is not a family without YOU." Then he reminded me what I told him after his heart attack when we almost lost him. He reminded me that he quit smoking, he started exercising and eating "rabbit food (salad)" for me. He told me the only way I was being selfish was by NOT trying.

It's going to take a few days for my body to push out the poisons I've been feeding it. I was up every hour on the hour last night running to the bathroom. The body is pretty unforgiving, especially after you have given it the things it's needed for awhile and you abruptly take them away. It rebels, big time. I've learned my lesson.

I hope.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GREGGWEISBROD 11/18/2013 11:52AM

    lol, grace comes in all forms and fashions... even begrudgingly. So I'm sticking with my theory that you get through this period of your life with grace... but I should add the appropriate addendum of "even if you had to kick and scream all the way through it." :-)

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CINDYC53 9/25/2010 1:33PM

    Great blog! Thanks for your honesty. We've all been there, Michelle! Amazing isn't it how we turn to food for comfort in times of stress... (Cause we're human!) Looking forward to your "comeback!"
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ANNAMARIE1958 9/18/2010 7:54PM

    I just gained 10 lbs too and its not that fell off the wagon its that I fell and broke my pelvis. I am mad at my self for falling but accidents do happen. I watched and tracked my food its just I have to stay off my leg. I can't wait until I heal so I can get this weight off...Hate it!

You go girl! emoticon

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DUTCHIEKIWI 9/18/2010 12:03AM

    You are taking your control back! I applaud you!

Keep it up, take me with you... together we'll get there!!

xox

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TRENTDREAMER 9/17/2010 6:03PM

    i f4ll i2 the 'it only affects m3' syndrome 2. even that though...

take care of urself. u know im here 4 u

emoticon emoticon

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K8NJKSMOM 9/17/2010 2:51PM

    Michelle - we've all been there (or are, ahem, there right now). Does us all good to have someone we love to give us that reminder and to kick ourselves back into gear.

Yes - you can do it - with the support of your wonderful hubby - and with your strong will!

You can do it!!

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JILLWILSON2102 9/17/2010 11:38AM

    Michelle aren't you very glad that you have people in your life who give you the tough love you need! emoticon to you and Brian. Now get going!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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STARTINGINLIMBO 9/17/2010 7:19AM

    You have lots of things to remind you to stay true to yourself/my nutrition tracker. Go for it. You can do it!

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DONGR8NCHARNC 9/17/2010 12:17AM

    Keep pushing, Michelle! You do it with such heart and lets not forget about your humor!

Gentle hugs,
Denise
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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CARTOONB 9/17/2010 12:10AM

    Well said!

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CHERIRIDDELL 9/17/2010 12:00AM

    You also make your Spark friends realize they are not alone which is just what they need to get them back on the straight and narrow so you motivate us all with your honesty ! We can face it together!!!

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DARLENEK04 9/16/2010 7:21PM

  Nothing that is going on in your life is your fault, you
know....if any of the rest of us were so hard on ourself
you would be right there pointing out how to get back on
the wagon and get straight.

You are tired, mostly emotional, and stressed. All this
is to blame for your lapse, sugargirl, now calm down,love
thyself, and lets get going back on the right road. Bless
Brian for pointing out how much you are needed...

Hugs,
Momma

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DREAMGIRL76 9/16/2010 6:27PM

    Michelle, I am so glad you are on my team, and so glad you posted this blog. Painful as the truth can be sometimes you have no idea how much others can relate.

It is clear that alot is going on in your personal life, and for many of us it becomes a time we turn to comfort foods that are not the healthiest. End result is the yucky feeling you are dealing with now, getting that out of your system and realizing you only feel good when your eating RIGHT.

God Bless Brian for taking care of his health, supporting you and loving you no matter what, but also loving you enough to risk being REAL with you. Take to heart what he has told you. Love yourself as much as you are loved and get to walking with your loved one together, and making those healthy meals together and don't forget to laugh!!!! Its great for the stress.

Please come to our team and read the cute joke I posted today under Laughter is the best medicine topic!!! Its a keeper.

Take care, you've had your reality check now its time to get back on the wagon, tie yourself in and get ready its gonna be a wild ride!!!!

Love ya, Debbie

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KATVHALE 9/16/2010 6:22PM

  Michelle, don't even ask me about my eating behavior since last November!!! I gained weight back too and I haven't been exercising at all so you are already ahead of me! I bet I can out excuse you any day of the week! I don't have any kind of disorder except opening my mouth too much; is that a disorder? I bet my DH would say it is! emoticon

You know what you have to do to get back on track and so do I. We need to get our willpower back and a good mindset. I'm workin on it but slowly very slowly... I will get it back and so will you.

Please give Brian a huge hug and a great big kiss for me because he is such a great guy! I wonder if he and my Norm are related? We are so blessed to have such great men in our lives.

Chin up sista friend!

Kat

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PJSTIME 9/16/2010 4:32PM

    Wow Brian sounds like a guy who really really cares about you and he is right. I don't know why we have such a hard time being as good to ourselves as we are to everyone else. I'm that way too. Put everyone else first or used to, I am now trying to put me first at least part of the time.

Hang in there we can do this.

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LIZZYP609 9/16/2010 4:02PM

    Brian is a good man! He is sooo right. Thanks for writing this! I have been saying the same things to myself and I need to turn this around!
Thank You Michelle and Brian!

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FLEMIDG 9/16/2010 3:16PM

    Oh, Michelle. I can sympathize with you. I understand what you are going through. You beat yourself up about it already, so now you know what you need to do. Get back on track. Start eating healthy and get out and walk or dance or whatever, just get some cardio going.
I am so glad you have such a wonderful DH who is there for you.
Hey, now that I have found such a wonderful friend, don't you dare do anything to her to keep me from spending time with her. I'd be lost without you. Love you lots.

Darlene
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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IAMDIOSA 9/16/2010 2:41PM

    Wow - I just read this at a time I really needed it. Thank you! You will push through, I know it. Work your way back up with the walking (I know the auto-immune beast is relentless, but it will help keep it at bay).

Gentle hugs if you want them, and again thank you! emoticon emoticon

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JRDIAMOND4 9/16/2010 2:02PM

    MICHELLE!!!!,

Look here girlie. I am not taking no excuses. No pity party allowed. I am not doing without your friendship, so you better get movin, sista. You don't want us Sparkies to gang up on you.

You have grand babies and future grandbabies to hold and a husband to grow old with. Family and friends that love you. Feeling guilty yet!?!

Seriously, we love ya, need ya, and would like to have ya around for a while. Who would we pick on? lol

Today is a new day, a new start. Brush it off, clean the Bullcrap off the boots and get to walkin, kickin, or stompin to get back in the groove.

emoticon

emoticon
Dr Jeckl or Mr Hyde(take your pick)

ps.. these words have a patten pending. NO copying for future use, especially against the author. bwahahahahaha



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BKNOCK 9/16/2010 1:14PM

    Aw Michelle, you are so tough you are a survivor and you have a ton of people rooting for you! Besides that you are not alone! Many of us have gained weight over the summer. It has been so blasted hot this summer who can move a lot? See I just gave myself another excuse!

Like I said yesterday, brush your self off and start slowly. Stop eating the crap and maybe take a walk or do an exercise video. I love the Leslie Sansone DVD's not too hard but you sweat a bit!

Take care!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MUSTANG_SALLY2 9/16/2010 1:08PM

    I like that Brian guy. Not only does your family need you, your computer spark buddies do too. I so look forward to your blogs and seeing those black boots on my page! LOL (I gotta get me some of those!) The world would be a mighty different place w/o you. Glad to hear you are taking steps in the right direction. I'm cheering for you! Hang in there!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

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My Bucket List

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Noooo, I'm not planning on going anywhere soon, but there are some things I've been thinking about doing before I bite the dust someday. Most of you already know that I want to parachute or hang glide. (Some of you think that will expedite my journey to the Other Side, but, hey, at least I'll go in style!) So, I sat down earlier this evening and began typing out some things that sound interesting to me. Such as:

1) Learn Tae Kwon Do. I don't know what it is, but it's really fun to say.
2) Learn how to yodel. I've tried it before in the shower. Brian asked if I needed a Vicodin or some whiskey to dull the pain.
3) Go to Fudpuckers at Fort Walton Beach, Florida. I'll take pictures for Betsy and John of the sign!
4) See the Pyramids of Giza, Egypt.
5) Sneak one of my paintings into the Louvre in Paris, France. We'll see if they notice the Mona Lisa replaced by my painting of Marilyn Monroe! Then we'll see how much it costs to get bailed out of jail in Paris!
6) Go to the Mardi Gras in New Orleans and see what all the fuss is about with the beads!
7) Learn how to use a pogo stick.
8) Audition for Wipe-Out and Whacked-Out Sports! After I realize I can't use a pogo stick!
9) Learn how to do magic tricks so that I can keep Brian's attention for more than thirty seconds. SQUIRREL!
10) Learn to brew beer. OH, C'MON! My mother was a God-fearing woman, too, but she kept a mason jar of moonshine in her bathroom closet! She didn't drink it, but she was proud of her first canning session given to her by my grandmother!
11) Kiss Gerard Butler. B-U-T--L-E-R. Not D-E-P-A-R-D-E-I-U..........
12) Drive a Ferrari...just once. FAST.
13) Sleep in a castle. On second thought, no, there's probably spiders in there...
14) Fly IN a blimp instead of FEELING like one!
15) Learn how to belly dance...and NOT throw my back out of place.
16) Walk across the Golden Gate Bridge.
17) Meet HARLEYBABETOBE, BKNOCK, CARTOONB, GEEMAWEST, DUTCHIEKIWI, CALIMAN1, and all 123 of my SparkFriends! Even if they're NOT Steelers fans!
18) Go on a cruise...with TOM Cruise. It's okay, Brian. You can come, too!
19) See the Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament in London. THEN see the Big Ben and the Terrible Towels in Heinz Field, Pittsburgh.
20) My ultimate Bucket List Wish is that everyone in my life know how much I appreciate them and love them. If that is all I accomplish, then I will be happy. That is THE MOST IMPORTANT thing to me.

Have a great evening, guys.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WALKOFFWIN 9/16/2010 2:14PM

    Interesting and entertaining bucket list, Michelle. I especially liked the one about yodeling. Lol :o) "SQUIRREL!" was pretty funny too.

Don't know about Mr. Butler, but I have good information that the "Cruise Missile" is very slow to lift off and often a complete dud. And it's as short as he is... (I was pen pals with Nicole Kidman after the break up. She said that I was the the only reason she got through it.)

Oh, and LOVED the Mona Lisa as Harley Momma! Now that's art! Lol :o)

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DARLENEK04 9/15/2010 7:41PM

  Well, I have driven a Porche..................LOL........
....
borrowed it from a lawyer...did you know they go to 115 in 2nd?

Of course I would love to meet all my spark friends also.

I am a Steelers fan though...............

Hugs,<
BR>MommaD

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TERRYT55 9/15/2010 5:31PM

    What a great list! I love it.....your picture of the Mona Lisa isn't bad either. emoticon

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STARTINGINLIMBO 9/15/2010 9:42AM

    How fun:)

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PJSTIME 9/15/2010 7:19AM

    I love your list and the fun you must of had thinking about it. I would love to meet some more of my spark friends too. Maybe that is in our future. You want to yodel I want to learn to whistle.

Have a great day.

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LIZZYP609 9/15/2010 6:36AM

    I love the list!! I also wish to meet a lot of my spark friends! Who knows...one day!

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HICKOK-HALEY 9/15/2010 3:28AM

    When you get ready to cross the Golden Gate, let me know. I will drive up and join you!

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JHADZHIA 9/15/2010 12:15AM

    Fun! I would love to go to Mardi Gras some day too! Enjoy the dreaming! The martial art you want to learn would be a heck of a good workout, and fun too! Be like Bruce Lee, flying through the air with a big kick LOL!


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RJFERRARO315 9/15/2010 12:12AM

    emoticon I love your bucket list. You made me laugh. I really hope you get a chance to do these things especially meet your Spark Friends. Geemawest & I met back in April and it was AWESOME!

Good Luck!
Rebecca emoticon emoticon

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USFBULL 9/15/2010 12:06AM

    emoticon my list has just expanded, LOL emoticon

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BLAKBIRD 9/14/2010 11:54PM

    Here's a random thought, inspired by your current day "Lisa Mona".

Imagine the incredible machines and works of arts Leonardo Da Vinci would have created with Photoshop and a CAD machine.

Once you have imagined them, what's to stop you creating them.

I'd probably jump out of a perfectly good plane to see your works of art on display in the Louvre.

In the meantime, don't waste a second gettingstarted on number 17 and I recommend in Alphabetic order by SP member name - emoticon

emoticon blog emoticon

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GEEMAWEST 9/14/2010 11:35PM

    I am actually watching Wipe Out right now. I was ragging DH about it, asking him what he found so funny. The next thing I knew I was laughing out loud. I must say, and don't take this personally, but I think I would laugh even louder if I was watching you.
emoticon

I'm with Dutchie, let's go to Amsterdam! Woo Hoo!!

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FLEMIDG 9/14/2010 11:23PM

    Awesome blog, Michelle. I hope you get to accomplish at least some of the things on your list. Have a wonderful week.

Lots of love.

Darlene


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CARTOONB 9/14/2010 11:23PM

    8) I LOVE Wipe-Out! That show is totally up your alley!
9) Oh..shiny squirrel, even better!
11) Had to show DD the difference between Butler and Depardeiu...she agrees, but thinks they are both old (she's wrong! LOL)
17) I completely support this one!!

Right back at you for #20!!

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CHERIRIDDELL 9/14/2010 11:12PM

    I love your list .I did parachute when I was in the military ,all pilots have to once may I share my thought after I jumped "Why would anyone voluntarily jump from a plane unless it was going down in flames?" I jumped on the lone prairie and since I was much lighter back in those days they didn't calculate the drift right and I ended up in the one tree for miles !!!!!Meeting my Sparkfriends is so on my bucket list too!!! I bet between Dutcie and I we could lengthen your list ! Big Ben and the Houses of Parliament are on my mousepad ,my Mum was a Londoner!!!

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MUSIC66 9/14/2010 11:04PM

    sound great .would love to meet you too.

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THEMIGHTYLEX 9/14/2010 10:59PM

    Great Bucket List
it might be time to create one of my own. The trick to getting the painting inside is to wrap the canvas around yourself inside a large coat. Placing it over the Mona Lisa very quickly and running full speed out of the museum while an accomplice records the whole event will give you years of enjoyment... once the Parisians release you.

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LMB-ESQ 9/14/2010 10:57PM

    Michelle Da Vinci. Love your Mona Lisa! Or maybe we should call her Lisa Mona, since you seem to have turned her all on her side! I think if you mess with the real thing, there won't be enough money to bail you out. Yodeling? Where's my earplugs? I want to drive a Ferrari too! Faster than you! You can keep Gerard Butler. And Gerard Depardieu. And Tom Cruise too. I'll take Johnny Depp emoticon

My nephew tried to ride his bike across the Golden Gate bridge. He said he almost got blown off the side. Bring your umbrella and maybe you can fly like Mary Poppins. emoticon Oh, and wear a warm coat!

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GRACIE4ONE 9/14/2010 10:57PM

    I love the way you write! Awesome and humorous!

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DUTCHIEKIWI 9/14/2010 10:56PM

    AWESOME! I love it. Done a couple of those, but wouldn't it be totally awesome if we could walk the golden gate bridge with a huge group of spark friends!!!!!????!!!

Some of your choices will be on my list too, for sure!!

xoxoxox

I'm missing a few naughty ones that I KNOW you will want to do...
I'll just have to convince you... ;0)

How about a holiday to Amsterdam? It's gotta be in there... Non??

;0)

xoxox

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 9/14/2010 10:54PM

    emoticonYOU, my friend, have the wonderful gift of making everyone SMILE! emoticon

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HLTHYETER 9/14/2010 10:51PM

    Neat blog--including some good chuckles!

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SURVIVOR20J 9/14/2010 10:46PM

  YOU HAVE A FUN LIST AND I HOPE YOU DO ENERY THING. mOSTLY i HOPE YOU REALLY LIVE LIFE AND ENJOY THE RIDE. emoticon

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SURVIVOR20J 9/14/2010 10:45PM

  YOU HAVE A FUN LIST AND I HOPE YOU DO ENERY THING. mOSTLY i HOPE YOU REALLY LIVE LIFE AND ENJOY THE RIDE. emoticon

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MORGANLAFEE 9/14/2010 10:44PM

    Very humerous but thoughtful too. Thanks for sharing.

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DEE107 9/14/2010 10:42PM

    Thanks for sharing Hugs and sounds like a lot of fun ...

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For Betsy

Thursday, September 09, 2010

I thought she could use a laugh today. So, from one redneck to the other, here ya go, sweetie pie.

POPULAR REDNECK SAYINGS:

"Slicker than a harpooned hippo on a banana tree."

"Don't worry too much about it. Just do all you can do and let the rough end drag."

"That boy is about as sharp as a cue ball."

"That boy is a few fries short of a Happy Meal."

"He's ridin' a gravy train on biscuit wheels."

"That'll go over like a pregnant pole vaulter."

"I'd rather jump barefoot off a 6-foot step ladder into a 5 gallon bucket of porcupines than to...."

"It's as easy as herdin' chickens!"

"She's purtier than a mess of fried catfish."

"I'm busier than a stump full of ants!"

"That's slicker than snot on a doorknob!"

"No, that's slicker than snot on a goat's glass eye!"

"He's a nice guy but I don't think he has enough chlorine in his gene pool..."

POPULAR REDNECK WORDS:

"Bard" - verb. Past tense of the infinitive 'to borrow.' Usage: "My brother bard my pickup truck.

"Jawjuh" - noun. A state just north of Florida. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh just bard my pickup truck.

"Munts" - noun. A calendar division. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck and I ain't herd from him in munts!"

"Ranch"- noun. A tool. Usage: "I think I left my ranch in the back of the pickup truck my brother from Jawjuh bard a few munts ago."

"All"- noun. A petroleum based lubricant. Usage: "I sure hope my brother from Jawjuh puts all in my pickup truck."

"Far" - noun. A conflaguration. Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh doesn't change the all in my pickup truck, that thing's gonna catch far."

REDNECK PICS:









Have a good day, girlie. Big ole redneck hugs from me. ;)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

K8NJKSMOM 9/17/2010 2:52PM

    Thank you for my laugh of the day!!! Loved them!

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DBFBILLY 9/11/2010 9:40PM

    Too funny and so true emoticon

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DONGR8NCHARNC 9/11/2010 12:12AM

    Too funny- enough said!

Denise
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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TRENTDREAMER 9/10/2010 10:35AM

    "That boy is a few fries short of a Happy Meal."

- i us3 "a few wrestlerz sh0rt of a battle r0yal" or "a few corn kernels short of a c0b"

sam3 idea tho.

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CHERIRIDDELL 9/10/2010 1:00AM

    LOL! And I thought I was a linguist shows you can always learn something new!!!

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JUNIAATROME 9/10/2010 12:37AM

    Now that's what I call an instructive blog. And I'm a polyglot now. Well earned points. LOL

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CARTOONB 9/9/2010 9:18PM

    Those are redneck words snd sayings?? Oops. emoticon

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NANALD 9/9/2010 9:07PM

    Thanks for the great laugh! emoticon

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MUSIC66 9/9/2010 7:28PM

    awsome lol.

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GEEMAWEST 9/9/2010 7:20PM

    You forgot the word "Tarrs" as in - we put 4 new snow tarrs on the truck.

emoticon

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ONEREALLYBIGDOG 9/9/2010 5:41PM

    Sure glad that I finally got invited to the party. I'm tired and in pain and this really cheered me up!

I was rather surprised that you posted your motorcycle picture though! LOL

Thanks again for all the chuckles!
You made my day once again.

I guess if I said you need to explain them to me now, it would be too late, LOL

Have a SPlendid day! emoticon

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FLEMIDG 9/9/2010 4:45PM

    Thanks for making me smile. I love your blogs.

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 9/9/2010 4:31PM

    Now, that was great!!!! emoticon

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DARLENEK04 9/9/2010 4:21PM

  All ya'll (plural) know what my favorite is:

The sign, signed Owner

Thanks Michelle for the giggles.

Momma

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CALIMAN1 9/9/2010 3:21PM

    oh the depths we will sink for 3 points...........I think I'll blog about this!!!!!!!!!!!

emoticon

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JILLWILSON2102 9/9/2010 3:05PM

    and my favorite "he's about as bright as a 10-watt bulb"...to funny emoticon

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BKNOCK 9/9/2010 2:50PM

    Do you know what John is going to say about this one!!

Thanks for cracking me up twice in one day! I really needed that!

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BIKERBABE2BE 9/9/2010 2:31PM

    emoticon

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PJSTIME 9/9/2010 1:56PM

    Love em all. emoticon

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DOLPHINFAN1334 9/9/2010 1:32PM

    THOSE WERE GREAT! THANKS FOR SHARING THEM WITH EVERYONE. emoticon

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The Ultimate Pick-up Line

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

I was at the Dollar Store last night trying to find a cheap shower caddy for Breanna. The shower stalls at OU are small, close together and there isn't a place to set her many essentials (a.k.a. shampoo, conditioner, serum, body soap, body lotion, razors, shave cream and who-knows-what-else) as she is getting ready for her day. As I was debating between a lime green, purple or hot pink one, a "gentleman" came up to me and struck up a conversation. I pleasantly smiled and continued my business, silently wondering when he was going to LEAVE. Then he said, "Ya know, maybe you and I could grab a drink sometime." I didn't even look at him. The only thing I did was hold up my left hand and wiggle my ring finger. After apologizing, he hurried off; but I couldn't help but grin. I couldn't wait to get home and tell Brian that someone tried to pick me up at the DOLLAR STORE! It was kinda flattering, too. I mean, C'MON. It makes you feel good to know that you're not a big anatomical mess! My hard work has paid off!!

Brian didn't even bat an eye when I told him and asked, "Do they carry tarp?"
"TARP?!?"
"YOU know what tarp is."
"Yeah, I KNOW what tarp is, but that's all you have to say??"
"About WHAT?"
"About that guy in the store!"
"His pick-up line was lame."
"Okay...so you're judging him by his PICK-UP LINE. NICE."

I remember Brian's pick-up line. Twenty years ago, I was walking back to my apartment and this huge Ford Bronco with a four-inch lift kit and monster tires pulled up alongside me on the sidewalk. Over the roar of the engine he shouted, "HEY! DON'T YOU LIVE THREE APARTMENTS DOWN FROM ME??!"
"WHAT?!"
"DON'T YOU LIVE THREE APARTMENTS...."
"I CAN'T HEEEAR YOU!"
"DON'T YOU...."
Cutting the engine, he said, "Don't you live three doors DOWN from me?"
"Yeah...and your point is?"
"You need a ride back to your place?"
Looking over my shoulder, I could see my apartment door. Looking back at him, I saw him grinning and he said, "Or we could just go grab a pizza after while."

What a cute grin. I was soo smitten.

We ended up getting pizza that evening. And watching the movie "Ghost." Just as my eyes were tearing up when Patrick Swayze was going into The Light, Brian leaned over and planted one right on my lips.
"What are you doing?!?"
"I'm sorry. No, I'm not. I've been eyeing you for two months now. So, NO, I'm not sorry. And I want to kiss you again. And again. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen and I want to kiss you for many days to come."
"Okay."
"OKAY??"
"Yeah. Okay."
Cue the cheesy grin. Cue the Cupid's arrow. And I've allowed him to kiss me...for many YEARS to come.

So, last night, as I watched Brian ransack the building for weed-eater string and holler at the cat for getting under his feet, I realized something; that's still the same guy who had to lift me up and put me in the passenger seat of his monster Bronco because I was too short. He's still the same guy who rushed home in the middle of his workday with a ring and TOLD me I was going to marry him. He's also the same guy who said he had been eyeing me for two months because he's had his eye on me for twenty years now.

So YEAH. The Dollar Store guy's pick-up line WAS pretty lame.

Brian knew he NEVER stood a chance.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DBFBILLY 9/11/2010 9:33PM

    That is an awesome story..Sounds like you found your prince emoticon I want to hold out for someone specialtoo...What few times i've dated, i've come to realize i'd rather be alone, until the special one comes along..I'm not going to settle anymore..I'm happy for you emoticon

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CARTOONB 9/8/2010 10:54PM

    Awwww! (You and Brian) Suh-weet! (Getting hit on!) Of course! (Not being an anatomical mess)

So....have you been married for 20 years? What day is your anniversary? I have been married for 20 years. Another creepy coincidence?

emoticon

Comment edited on: 9/8/2010 11:00:32 PM

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MOMFAN 9/8/2010 10:49PM

    What a great memory. A guy this week was hitting on me in the library. Only problem was I didn't realize it until he said, "I hope I am not hitting on a married woman?" Told him sorry I was, I am not wearing a ring because we lost the diamond over a year ago. I was just clueless! So my family gets a laugh about their clueless mom.

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GEEMAWEST 9/8/2010 10:33PM

    Cute, very, very cute. You, Brian and the story.

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BLAKBIRD 9/8/2010 10:26PM

    emoticon emoticon

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JILLWILSON2102 9/8/2010 9:28PM

    What a wonderful love story - you are one lucky couple! emoticon

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BKNOCK 9/8/2010 7:12PM

    Wow, first you have people attacking you in Walmart and now you have men picking you up in the Dollar Tree. Is it safe for you to go out alone? LOL!

Great blog as usual!

Betsy

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DARLENEK04 9/8/2010 4:45PM

  Great blog Michelle....Brian is a keeper, forever and ever...

But then, I knew you still had "it".....ha I'm your Momma
and I know these things...lol

Hugs Baby,
Love
Momma

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CALIMAN1 9/8/2010 3:42PM

    ok, so tell me, if the guy had tarp under one arm, THEN issued the pick up line....would that have made Brian go through the roof????

It's all in the tarp....I know that if a guy approaches my wife without tarp, not an issue...but when the tarp guys come, I get all emoticon

I liked all the stories in this blog...and doggone it, your work has paid off and Mr Dollar Tree guy definitely noticed....your Brian pizza big truck story was also very special. I think others are right, you are a lucky lady with the one.

Now go tell him I said so....and, no, it's not tarp under my arm....he can put away the evil eyes!!!!!! emoticon

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THEBOOKBINDER 9/8/2010 3:13PM

    WOW hell he is a keeper. That is such a sweet story. He does so love you and the fact that he doesn't feel insecure is awesome.


OHHH and BTW you didn't have to tell everyone that I tried to pick you up at the Dollar store. That was the best pick up line I could think of at the time, all my other ones never worked! emoticon emoticon

Comment edited on: 9/8/2010 3:15:38 PM

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FLEMIDG 9/8/2010 2:54PM

    Michelle, that was a great blog. It is fun to know that what we are doing is working. You are a lovely woman on the inside and outside, so I could see someone coming on to you. Maybe Brian experienced just a little bit of jealousy when you told him. I love the story about your romance. You seem to have been made for each other. You are both so lucky to have each other.
God bless you both.

emoticon

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DAWNO64 9/8/2010 2:15PM

    That's one of the sweetest stories I've ever heard...he was definitely smitten with you, and not willing to give up!

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TEENY2BEE 9/8/2010 2:05PM

    OMUGASH

Thats so SWEET!!!!!!! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BADASSBLONDIE 9/8/2010 12:15PM

    This post made me feel all warm and fuzzy. :-D Also, I used to drive a 94 Ford Bronco, so that makes me happy.

Comment edited on: 9/8/2010 12:30:42 PM

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BWCAGRL 9/8/2010 12:07PM

    What a great story and a great perspective! Thanks for sharing! I used to work every Sunday so my hubby would take the kids to church. I knew it was going to happen and finally, a woman approached him and started talking about how tough it was to raise children as a single parent, and would he like to go out sometime to swap stories!
Unfortunately for her, after the shock wore off his face my husband laughed out loud and told her he was happily married. He told me about it and I said, "See, I'm not the only one who thinks you're hot!" Sometimes we all need a little reminding that we're desirable.
And, it's great to know that taking care of ourselves has so many benefits!
Keep Sparking!

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HAPPY_AS_IS 9/8/2010 12:02PM

    You sound like one lucky gal!!

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PJSTIME 9/8/2010 12:02PM

    That had to be a great ego boost. And a nice love story about you and Brian. Ahhh True love is great. We sometimes just have to remember those swet memories.

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ONEREALLYBIGDOG 9/8/2010 12:01PM

    Cute story!
So, that was ME in the Dollar Store,
and you told everybody that you shot me down, LOL

Can't blame the guy,
could you?

Keep those home fires burning for another twenty years.
Bre' could use another little sister! LMAO

Thanks for putting yet another smile on our faces!


emoticon

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JRDIAMOND4 9/8/2010 12:00PM

    OMG, Michelle, I had the same thing happen to me at Wal-Mart. Billy was standing at the end of the isle and I had walked back to get something and this guy came walking fast toward me and said I found you. I have been watching you, You are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen. I don't know what my reaction was cuz I was speechless. He ask are you married and all I could do was show him my ring finger and he said figures, but I just had to tell you, You are beautiful and walked away. When my legs would finally move, I ran to Billy and punched him told him to never leave me again. He probably had the same look on his face when I hit him as I did when the guy approached me. I told Billy as we were checking out the story. No comment, he just laughed.

As he started the truck. He said "Whew, taking you shopping is exhausting, loading the groceries and having to beat the guys off you."
lol I just grinned all the way home. hehehe

I love your blog. Isn't it so awesome that our hubbies still make our hearts go pitter patter.


emoticon

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THAMLEY 9/8/2010 11:58AM

    I'm surprised that doesn't happen to you all the time--you are gorgeous ya know. So sweet though, just what we need to keep us on track, and keep Brian on his toes!

Your love story sounds much like my own. He'd been "eyeing" me at the local A&P store for a couple of months before he got nerve to ask me out. Then it took me a few weeks to agree(incredibly shy)! That blond hair and bright blue eyes, I wanted to run off with him immediately. He told me we would be married on the very first date(I laughed at him). Here we are 32 yrs later--barely been apart more than a day since.

Here's to being smitten; but pick-up attempts always welcome--it gives us that nice little glow. When we've worked hard for it, we deserve it, as long as we don't reciprocate the offer.

Keep on being beautiful!


emoticon emoticon emoticon

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LMB-ESQ 9/8/2010 11:48AM

    Sweet story.... and a nice ego boost! Congrats! I haven't had a pick up line for awhile. And you're right, Brian knew the lame guy in the dollar store was no threat to him LOL

Oh, and apropos of nothing, I asked my son if he wanted something like a little bucket or a basket or something to carry his stuff to the shower. He looked at me like *I* was lame. "Mom," he said, "I have soap and shampoo. What do I need a basket for? Do you think I'm a *girl* or something?" emoticon

Boys.... **sigh**

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 9/8/2010 11:44AM

    Gosh, girl! You make me smile, then go in for the kill and make me tear up?! emoticon emoticon

That was awesome! emoticon

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QUIKSYLVER 9/8/2010 11:39AM

    Awww, cute story!

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BIKERBABE2BE 9/8/2010 11:35AM

    Aw...true love! This is wonderful and you and Brian have a wonderful thing going.

Congrats on the fact that someone tried to pick you up. That always boost the ego...even if he is lame!

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YOU Are SO WEIRD!

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

I have always been fascinated by the human body for as long as I can remember. I can recall being a small child, and even before I could read, sitting and pouring over my mother's medical journals looking at the pictures on each page. It is probably why I majored in Psychology and later on became a nurse. I just had to know what made us tick...and what I could do to keep on ticking! We all know by now how many calories we must burn to lose a pound of fat, how to ease the burn of a strained muscle and how to cut the unnecessary fat from our diets, but did you know that:

- The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue. It is the only muscle in our body that is not attached at both ends. Also, every individual has a unique tongue print just like we have unique finger prints.
- The average human will eat on average 8 spiders while sleeping.
- The average woman consumes 6 pounds of lipstick in her lifetime.
- The human brain weighs about 3 pounds. The human head weighs 8 pounds.
- You blink over 10,000,000 times a year. Women blink twice as many times as a man.
- When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop...even your heart. It's impossible to truly sneeze with your eyes open.
- If you yelled for 8 years, 7 months and six days you would have produced enough sound energy to heat one cup of coffee.
- Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza in a DAY.
- If you passed gas consistently for 6 years and 9 months, enough gas is produced to create the energy of an atomic bomb.
- On average a human will spend up to 2 weeks kissing in his or her lifetime. A one-minute kiss burns 26 calories. Maybe we should kiss more often?
- Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for the heart. Yet the surface area of the human lung is equal to that of a tennis court.
- The higher your IQ, the more you dream. And in color.
- The typical human body contains enough sulfur to kill all fleas on an average dog.
- We are born with 300 bones. Yet, by the time we reach adulthood, we have 206 bones. Babies are also born without knee caps.
- The average human body sheds around 600,000 particles of skin every hour; that is about 1.5 pounds a year. By age 70, you will have lost 105 pounds of skin. Ever wonder where it goes?
- The average adult's empty stomach has the volume of 1/5 of a cup. When stuffed with food the volume can reach a little over a gallon.
- During your lifetime, you will produce enough saliva to fill two swimming pools. And did you know that if your saliva cannot dissolve something, then you cannot taste it?
- The three things pregnant women dream most of during their first trimester are frogs, worms and potted plants.
- After eating too much, your hearing is less sharp.
- Your body has enough iron in it to make a 3-inch long nail.
- The indentation in the middle of the area between the nose and the upper lip is called the philtrum. Didn't know it had a name, did ya?
- Facial hair grows faster than any other hair on the body. Pfff! Tell that to the hair on my legs!
- The acid in your stomach is strong enough to dissolve razorblades. You get a new stomach lining every three to four days. If you didn't, it would digest itself.
- It takes 72 muscles to produce human speech.

I bet you didn't know you were that complicated, did you?

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUNIAATROME 9/9/2010 3:12AM

    I think I know when I ate one of the 8 mendatory spiders per life...

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TRENTDREAMER 9/8/2010 9:04AM

    "The average woman consumes 6 pounds of lipstick in her lifetime. "

* g33z + i thought grlz/women just used it on their lipz. im going to l00k @ my female frendz v3ry differently now. emoticon lol

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FLEMIDG 9/7/2010 11:49PM

    Love those blogs, Michelle. Where did you get all this weird information?


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CHERIRIDDELL 9/7/2010 11:41PM

    I can go one better than just weird when my daughter was in primary school the Sting song "An englishman in NewYork " was popular and I was cheerfully singing along and one of her friends queried the "I'm a legal alien " part and I said "I'm an alien too" meaning married to a soldier coming originally from another country and this child went home and asked her Mum what planet I came from ???Is that weird enough??

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BLAKBIRD 9/7/2010 11:01PM

    emoticon

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CARTOONB 9/7/2010 10:41PM

    Unfortunately, I had heard the spider thing before. Blech! emoticon

You wanna take my toungue print? LOL!

Thanks for the interesting facts....whether I wanted to know them or not! LOL!

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JILLWILSON2102 9/7/2010 9:27PM

    I think I like being weird! emoticon emoticon

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MOMFAN 9/7/2010 7:16PM

    God made us all amazing and unique!

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LMB-ESQ 9/7/2010 5:53PM

    HEHE emoticon

I like the one about the atomic bomb. Does that mean I should eat more beans? emoticon

I don't dream much, but I do dream in color. Am I in trouble for law school? emoticon

And after eating too much, ALL my senses are less sharp... usually cuz I'm asleep! emoticon

Funny and interesting! Thanks for sharing!

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THEBOOKBINDER 9/7/2010 5:23PM

    emoticon yep right I'm weird!

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DREMARGRL 9/7/2010 3:57PM

    Kewwwl! Interesting. There were a few on that list I'd never read before. Thanks for sharing. Have a nice night. XO MaryAnn emoticon

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USFBULL 9/7/2010 3:34PM

    emoticon

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STEVENGO2 9/7/2010 3:26PM

    Sometimes I dream in color and some times I dream in black in white, so I assume that makes me somewhat intelligent! Where did you pick up all these interesting facts?

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NANALD 9/7/2010 3:03PM

    emoticon You must have had to look a while to find this! YOu are right...we are weird and this just begins to touch the surface of how weird we are! Thanks for sharing!

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VRADAA 9/7/2010 3:01PM

    Good grief! Some of that info I didn't need to know!! LOL!

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SWEETYKINS012 9/7/2010 1:15PM

    hehehe!!! i had read some of these before.... i dream in color. momma-little, you peed your pants because your muscles relaxed and quit working when you sneezed!!!! hehehe!!!!

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LITTLEFARMMOMMA 9/7/2010 12:53PM

    OK, girlie, explain why sometimes I pee my pants when I sneeze really hard! LOL!! It didn't stop my bladder! Thanks for your blog. It was just the ticket! emoticon

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LIQUID11 9/7/2010 12:43PM

    emoticon
Interesting info, to think about…
emoticon

And who that funny little fellow might be?
He Rocks!! Definitely an Important addition on my Motivational Collage/ Desktop Wallpaper LOL
emoticon

Andreas


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ONEREALLYBIGDOG 9/7/2010 12:27PM

    You got the title of this blog RIGHT!

But we already knew that YOU were weird. Had to say it BEFORE you said it about me, LOL

Some awesome info there

Did you tell Bre' all that after she left? She's probably at Macy's looking for a RIUG for her mother's tongue, LMAO

Thanks for brightening up my day, now I can get to work and work WITH a smile on my silly face and no one will know what I'm smilin' about!

Enjoy
I did!

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PJSTIME 9/7/2010 12:24PM

    What a fun blog filled with all this info. My DH must always eat too much he nevers seems to be able to hear me. emoticon

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GEEMAWEST 9/7/2010 12:08PM

    WOW! Too much information before I've had my second cup of coffee.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

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BIKERBABE2BE 9/7/2010 11:53AM

    According to your stats I am super smart...I dream in color and lots of it....also I agree on the facial hair...I have some that grow three-four inches an hour (especially on my chin)!

Thanks for the fun facts. Have a wonderful Tuesday!

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BKNOCK 9/7/2010 11:49AM

    Gotta say, this was a pretty interesting blog! Now why is John mentioning my name again? Let's see how he gets his next 3 points!

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DARLENEK04 9/7/2010 11:44AM

  Michelle,

As far as the scream/yell theory for heating coffee, after
much deep thought and introspection thinking on this......

I decided I will just use the microwave as it is much faster.
And the winning thought here is that it is also much quieter.

Thanks for the great blog....
Momma

PS: I read this spider thing years ago, so I sleep with a
surgical mask on, just in case spiders attack me in my sleep.
Are we weird, or what???

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PIA2000 9/7/2010 11:30AM

    I thought everyone dreamt in colour!!! However, I dont usually remember my dreams , colourful though they are! SO does this mean I am only smart some of the time ? :P

Either way - I enjoyed reading this one ! Thanks ! :)

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CALIMAN1 9/7/2010 11:26AM

    Hmmm, I see you are beginning to fall under that rarest of conditions...what is that thing called????? I can't think of it. I think Betsy might know though!!!!! emoticon

Aside from this, I will always enjoy any reading that talks about spider munching and enough gas to rival that of an atomic bomb....what is better than that???

Hope u are well my friend...emjoy this beautiful Tuesday....say that like Cary Grant would and it sounds so much better....why is that? Or maybe like that, who is it you like, Geraldo Rivera????? Gerard Depardieu???????

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KAILYNSTAR 9/7/2010 11:24AM

    I did know some of that but I didn't know about the higher the IQ the more you dream and in colour. That means that I must be smart. I like that. I have always dreamed in colour and never understood people telling me that all people dream in black and white. This clears everything up.

I love blogs like this.

Have a great day!

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