Monday, January 05, 2009
Well, I am quite proud of myself. I got a new job almost 3 months ago, and until today, hadn't been back to the gym since accepting the job offer. Some of this was justified: getting adjusted to waking up much earlier than I'd been accustomed to, the new job itself, tripling the number of hours worked within a few weeks, fitting exercise into my schedule. Some of it was not: being more convenient to sit on my ass, getting comfortable with being lazy, not wanting to go to the gym at more crowded times than I was used to. Well, today, after having toyed with the idea for..well..about 2 months lol..I rejoined the gym. Now, I'm not thrilled with the gym itself but there are no choices nearby, so I just have to suck it up for the time being. But I AM quite proud of myself for doing 35 minutes on my first day back! When I first started exercising in April, I could barely do 20 minutes without thinking I was going to die. I really hate how much more out of shape I am than I was 3 months ago, but on the plus side, it's not nearly as out of shape as I was 8 months ago. The elliptical was hell, and makes me never ever want to stop exercising for any length of time again, because it brought back flashbacks as to when I first used an elliptical lol. But when I'd been exercising in October, I was alternating between 3.8 and 4.2 and tonight I alternated no problem between 3.7 and 3.9. I even did a few minutes of 4.1 (although that made me feel like I was going to puke).
I'm not much for New Years resolutions...I think they're a cop-out, when people are fully capable of making changes any day of the year. But with the end of 2008, I reflected on the positive changes I'd made for myself throughout the year and wanted to bring those changes with me into 2009, so I took the whole end-of-the-year hype and used it as momentum for getting me back into the swing of things. And since I signed a 3-year contract with my gym, you'd better believe I'm going to keep going now!
Monday, September 01, 2008
This entry has been a long time coming (close to 2 months!) but my lazy self is finally getting to it because I think itís important to note. Well, back in May I started working out at Curves with my mom, and that was pretty cool because I had a workout buddy and it was all womenómost of whom were ďcurvyĒóso I didnít feel self-conscious. Well, when I went to NC in July there were no Curves within walking distance of where I was staying, so I managed to summon the courage to join a ďreal gym.Ē I was so terrified walking through the facility the first time! I felt unbelievably self-conscious; and when my brother came home to change into his exercise clothes, I was too anxious to return back that same night. Within the first couple times of exercising in public, I really didnít feel self-conscious! Okay, well, when I saw skinny bitches running on the treadmills without any surplus of fat to jiggle, or going level billion on the elliptical at the same speed as my measly level 3, I felt a *little* self-consciousÖbut not embarrassed! And now, being back home, I have joined a gym here and am quite excited by all the classes they offer. I even jumped right in and did a low-impact aerobics and toning class when I joined last Friday. A year ago, I never in my wildest dreams would have imagined myself being able to do this (let alone wanting to!), but it looks like my taking that Yoga & Pilates class in college last fall was one of the best personal choices I ever made because thatís what made me realize that I can still manage to have fun and try my hardest working out in public without spending my whole time giving a damn about what people think about me.
Friday, July 25, 2008
Well, last Saturday (7/19) I went to one of the open casting calls for season 7 of The Biggest Loser!! I waited outside in the 98 degree heat for 9.5 hrs just for my chance to talk to a casting person for a minute! I was very excited, seeing as how I've wanted to be on the show and tried making a video in May but was never able to mail it, due to circumstances beyond my control.
Sadly, for whatever reason, they weren't interested in me. They had callbacks for this past Monday and Tuesday and I never got my call.
I'm glad I did it, though. Now I know that the reason I won't be on it isn't due to my not trying. I just wanted a chance to take the weight off as fast as it went on, but I am going to lose it one way or the other, so it's not the end of the world.
On the plus side of things, I got 2 free t-shirts: 1 white sports store shirt and a blue Biggest Loser audition shirt. I was quite happy because the smallest size the BL shirts came in was XXL (my normal t-shirt size) and this one is quite baggy on me! YAY. And they both make great workout shirts.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
I was so proud of myself that I managed to lose 12 lbs in 2 weeks, only to have gained 2 of those lbs back in the past 2 weeks. You know, I expected to maybe gain some weight this past week, what with going out to Ruby Tuesdayís last week and then having chocolate fudge cake for Popís birthday over the weekend, but itís still really exasperating. I mean, couldnít I have at least stayed the same weight? I may not have eaten the best, but I have been exercising my butt off! Maybe not in comparison to some other team members, but a lot for me (30 mins a day, 5 days a week, for the past 3.5 weeks). Iím hugely proud of myself for the exercise, since Iíve been exercising consistently for the past 6 weeks and never made it to 3 weeks before in my entire life, but dammit, I want to see some results for all that work! I was supposed to get my big red monster yesterday and was hoping I could blame this weekís gain on that, but it still hasnít appeared. And then to top it off, my pants split today. Right down the seam of the rear. Just great. Iím exercising and trying to lose weight, and instead I go to sit down and tear out the butt of my pants. Howís that for self-esteem? I know that starting out my blog with a rant is a negative way to commence, but I am and have been just so frustrated. Iíve been depressed a bit lately, and so itís been hard to stop from eating junk as a result. I just havenít experienced any of the positive effects of exercise that everyone always raves about. I have no increase in energy; I still nap almost every day. And I know itís not just boredom or my generally liking to sleep; Iíve been genuinely tired a lot of the time. My knees, rather than feeling stronger, have been almost popping out since the weekend during the cool-down section of my aerobics workout. And Iím continuing to gain weight. Itís getting increasingly difficult to focus on the positive aspectsólike actually sticking to an activity programówhen Iím just not seeing or feeling any concrete benefits from doing so. Grr.
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