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Sunday AM Early

Sunday, April 03, 2011

Woke up early...had a challenging day yesterday. Took off with Mom for an adventure with hubby and meeting up with son and daughter in law for lunch....UGH Mom just wasn't happy. We went into a couple of little shops as we were early. It was too windy for her. I told her what to wear but she didn't remember and decided to wear dress pants instead of the jeans I had suggested and wore her dress shoes instead of walking shoes I had suggested and didn't bring her warmer coat like i had suggested to her. Just got a wrong start. We got seated and of course son and daughter in law were 20 minutes late...as usual...before they got there we had to play musical chairs 3 times to get mom seated comfortably. She chose every time. After the third rotation I said we are NOT playing musical chairs again! She complained about her water glass and the waitress brought her two new glasses and hubby finally suggested she use a straw. She finally said I'm just a pain in the A-- and I said Yes Mom some times you are! She had trouble finding anything to eat...needed more dressing for her Cesar chicken salad...we got it but she doesn't like Cesar dressing..so that was a bomb..on and on and on. We ended up having a nice time. I know she enjoyed herself afterwards and when we got her home she apologized to me. I seem to have little patience now days. I am tired after a week of work and Saturday is the only day to get things done around the house...Sundays I'm often tired after church and get some things done...but not as much. So I take my one day to do something special and she complains the whole time...I'm like Why do I do this? This is a waste of my time and effort. Then I feel quilty for feeling that way towards her. She is our only living parent. I wanted to make her BD special and only time we could meet up with son and daughter in law. She is an EGR person. I used to have more patience. I wasn't on my A game either. Usually I tease and pat her and chat with her a lot and tease and laugh with her...didn't feel like that yesterday and I was quiet...so didn't help to ease her along. Hubby tells me not to feel guilty...but I do. It's a vicious cycle. I long to treat her with respect, love, make her feel cherish and needed and after all these years I'm slowly becoming more vocal and not always overlooking her idiocyncrasies and quirks. Sometimes its hard to see what is her quirkiness and what is aging/alzheimers/depression issues. At the season where I need to show more patience and caring...I am less patient and caring. Issue I need to work on. Stopped by McDonalds on way home...because she had complained of not enough to eat...to get her her beloved chicken tenders...get in, order and she decides she too full and doesn't want to eat. Hubby and i weren't hungry but thought if we sat down she would eat...so we ate and she sat and watched us eat...so ate useless calories didn't need to eat to try to get her to eat which she didn't. She probably ate them when she got home alone. Some times I wonder why I try or care...UGH! Well we move on to a new day. I know why sister in law rarely calls. They care she is just difficult at times. I knew it would be challenging...just some times it piles up some. Hubby seems so patient with her..yet she is his mom. When my mom lived with us years ago with Alzheimers...he was NOT. I struggle with those memories too! Yet I choose to be patient and loving to her. Lessons we learn and struggle through life. Each day we choose whether to follow Christ or ourselves/world. Probably shouldn't vent it out. Woke me up at 4:30 pondering all this and thought maybe if I journal it out...I can analyze it and process it. Off to make it a GREAT DAY! AWESOME worship service ahead.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOMMA_BEAR_69 4/4/2011 4:11AM

    You did the best you could do at the time. Sometimes we don't feel our best is good enough. Don't beat yourself up over it. You are a great DIL!! You are in my thoughts and prayers.

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FLMOMX2 4/3/2011 7:49AM

    Praying for you as it sounds trying.

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ARLENE_MOVES 4/3/2011 7:43AM

    Been there, done that with MIL also. And we're supposed to be the perfect caregiver and always do the right thing when we don't know what the right thing is....impossible.

You are human and impatience and tiredness are part of life. Look at the other parts of your life - you are one busy woman. Breathe deep - today will be better.

emoticon emoticon

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CHARMIAN2 4/3/2011 6:44AM

  I am in the same situation with aging parent-good luck

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Saturday

Saturday, April 02, 2011

Up to get some work done around the house before we head out to kidnap mother in law. We are off to a historic town about an hour away. We are meeting son and daughter in law for lunch at 1 pm at a historic restaurant where a lot of former presidents have stayed. There are little shops to wonder around in...if the weather permits. Only time we could get toether with son and daughter in law so they could help celebrate mom's 76th BD. We're going to do something Tuesday for her BD and then kidnap her again next Saturday for a lunch cruise next Saturday. WAsn't available this weekend. Not sure how we're going to get her on the boat but know she will enjoy herself afterwards. Give her something to talk about for awhile. Going during the day so she can see outside the beautiful scenery - if she chooses. It's a buffet so she can choose what she wants to eat. Looking forward to seeing how she will react. She is always scared to try new things and afterwards it was the "BEST" thing. She is cooped up inside too much and getting out and out of her comfort zone will do her good. If she is with us...she will usually go with us...just a little nervous at first.

Off to begin the BD celebrations!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOMMA_BEAR_69 4/4/2011 4:06AM

    Sounds like great birthday plans for your family and MIL. Hope it all works out!!!

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Fabulous Friday

Friday, April 01, 2011

As I was leaving work yesterday I thought...WOW when our co-worker meets us half way it is almost pleasant-what a better week/day we have. We leave tired but not so weary, worn out and exhausted and cranked up.

Kidnapping Mom tomorrow and going on Adventure to celebrate her 76. Going to try and celebrate it all week next week. Taking her to little town for the day and venture around shops and meet up with son and daughter in law for lunch. Then out to dinner for her BD on Tuesday and then another kidnapping next Saturday and taking her on an hour river boat cruise/dinner. Not sure how we're getting her on a boat yet...but we'll do it. She needs to get out of her comfort zone. Gives her something to talk about at the community breakfast they have 2 times a week at her retirement complex. She enjoys adventures and we're not going to disappoint her. She was too scared to go on a plane when dad was alive...we get her on a plane a couple of times and she loves it and it's the best thing. Go figure....she needs to step out of her comfort zone. She trusts us and will usually go with us...scared/nervous at first and then loving it at the end. Life is too short to live in fear. She has taught me a lot...that isn't how I choose to live my life. I'm not going to go out to hurt myself..but if we don't step out of our comfort zone...mix things up a little...how boring and dull life can become. Plus you live caged in fear. You can tell she gets restless being house bound...because she is afraid to drive. We stir her up a little and she's okay for awhile with a lot to talk about. We need to do it while she is still active and able to get around. Wonder how she'd be if we just didn't take her to exercise, walk her around in the stores and keep her moving???? Thinking she would already be barely able to get around. Plus it helps time pass more quickly. She has a lot to offer yet she chooses to live in her cage of safety until we come to bust her out of it.

Boy the weeks do seem to go by quickly...May will be here soon and I'll get to see my daughter...Yipee! Can't wait to get my arms around her. We talk all the time but nothing better than a HUG...

Off to seize the day!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

STORMIE008 4/1/2011 10:16AM

    Your mother will have a great time! Enjoy the day and the memories you will create!

~Stormie~

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ARLENE_MOVES 4/1/2011 7:34AM

    Your Mom is very lucky to have you. Yes, our comfort zone is a nice place, but can get very boring. You are a gem!

And emoticon to you also!

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Thursday

Thursday, March 31, 2011

We had snow flurries and snow showers yesterday but not too much stuck...just on bushes and shady areas. Have gotten a taste of spring and am longing for nicer weather. Starting to see the flowers pop up and bloom. My forcythia is budded out. Got to Curves 3 times this week. Hips and joints feeling a little sore this AM. Maybe the bike will work out the soreness.

My hubby had dinner ready for me when I got home...the FIRST TIME IN 30 some years...it was a store bought PIZZA....and I was going to eat left over veggies...but kept my mouth shut and enjoyed. I can't believe he did that. He was proud of himself and I didn't want to spoil the moment. Miracles do happen!

Co-worker has been better this week. If she just meets us part way we all get along fine. When she gets that chip off her shoulder she is fine to work with. Maybe with time we can get there.....

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOMMA_BEAR_69 4/1/2011 3:39AM

    So glad our co-worker has been better this week. Congrats on DH making the pizza. Ken loves to cook but leaves the dishes for me. lol

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ARLENE_MOVES 3/31/2011 6:39AM

    Guess I'm the lucky one. Mine does all the cooking. Started when he retired and I was still working. He found out he liked it!!

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MARYJOANNA 3/31/2011 5:48AM

  There is always a first time. Maybe he is learning!?

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EDITOR 3/31/2011 5:35AM

    Hubby made a meal? What a wondrous occasion! Now what is that guy up to? I am usually not so suspicious but if mine did that I know something is out of line. I would then go buy him flowers to memorialize the occasion.

emoticon

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Wacky Wednesday

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Nothing really wacky going on...just thought it sounded fun! Had a good workout last night. Mom was dressed up...not sure exactly why...but it doesn't matter. At least she worked out some.

Got DD tickets last night. She's coming home from Florida for brother's graduation in May...on my birthday. BFF will also be in the area for their niece's graduation. Boy the month of May will be awesome. What a great BD present it will all be. Daughter's boyfriend also used flyer voucher to book his tickets to come back on the same flight with DD. So looking forward to time with her and him and BF and celebrate son's graduation from college with honors. He's taken the long way around but finally did it. Better get to work on cleaning up the house. May take that long to get it in shape!

Off to make it a great day!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MOMMA_BEAR_69 4/1/2011 3:36AM

    Hope you had a great day! With all you have planned, may will zoom right by. Hope you can take time to enjoy it!!

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GOLFINSUNSHINE 3/30/2011 5:24PM

    Am inspired by you g/f - your fitness minutes are the highest of all of my spark friends... emoticon emoticon

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EDITOR 3/30/2011 8:29AM

    A wacky Wed. sounded good to me and it appears that is the the day started off to be. But I am turning it around to a worship-filled Wed.

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