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1 year has passed and....wow alot has changed

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Wow I can't believe my last entry was more than a year ago, but I guess it was. I have dropped quite a bit of weight - 52 lbs so far...and alot of sacrifices have been made too...primarily for 2012. When I look back at last year I was not very happy, I had a very bad work situation where I was harrassed by mean co-workers, which is probably one of the reasons I started losing alot of weight. I started praying regularly for weightloss and to love excercise. Now my car has died and I had to surrender it to the auto repair shop today. I am learning to use the public transportation system and I am walking quite a bit too... my prayers are being answered. My work situation got better when I moved into another building to work with other people in my unit. I was sad and I felt betrayed but I will get over it and move on...I have no choice. I also have to make a huge financial decision that could affect me for years to come. I am praying on that too. I feel much more free now. I realized that "things" can be replaced, relationships are important though and should be nurtured. I have a crush on someone who has the kind of qualities I would like to have in a husband, (hopefully someday) and I am learning to let go of the past and to forgive those who have hurt me. I don't know what's going to happen but I am committed to stay positive this year and take the good and the bad with a cheerful and grateful heart.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

NUOVAELLE 1/18/2012 2:06AM

    "The best things in life aren't things."
I'm glad there are good changes happening in your life. Embrace them and keep this positive attitude.

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MARGIE4230 1/17/2012 7:09PM

    emoticon emoticon

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2011 - another year to getting fit

Monday, January 03, 2011

Well, 2011 is here and I am happy and sad. I didn't make my goals to losing more weight in 2010 and I had some personal setbacks too, I learned alot though, I learned to that I am important and that in order for me to be the person I dream of becoming I have to take steps to take better care of myself. I learned to stop listening to people's negative comments or they will bring me down, and to above all stay in the Word and believe in the Word. I have been struggling with the flesh for most of the year and 2 of my fears had come to pass not too long ago, but I have dreams and I will work hard to make these dreams come true. I am worth it and God loves me, even if I feel like the rest of the world doesn't.


awkward times...

Friday, November 12, 2010

I have come to the realization that I can't seem to communicate or conversate very well with others. This seems very apparent to me when I am at work. I have a supervisor who I really like and value but when I try to talk to him I feel like I have my feet in my mouth. I work with several other ladies who I don't really trust, they have shown themselves to be two-faced and untrustworthy. It makes me very sad, I want to keep my job and excel but I wonder if it will get any better. Not only that I feel so crippled in my ability to "shrug things off" the other ladies accuse me of being "too sensitive", "thin skinned" and I just want to tell them off but because I am on probation I feel I have to just take it til I pass. I just feel at a loss for words when the staff gathers around to talk and I feel I just can't join in. I thought I could just be quiet & work but in the end I just feel left out.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSPRIS3 11/12/2010 4:23PM

    Maybe you just need to find a group of people at your work that you do fit in with.

I have been at my job for almost 3 years, and the first year, I did not fit in with my "floor", so I sat in my car at break times, or outside by myself reading while I ate lunch. One day it was raining and too cold to sit in the car (plus waste the gas) so i sat with a group from the 1st floor. I fit in with them, they are more my type of people, and we sit together everyday and every break period now.

I understand your frustrations though, and being the new employee, it can be hard not knowing how to react or what the consequence will be if you do.

Keep your head up high, it will get better!

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IN102WIN 11/12/2010 1:59AM

    I totally know what you mean. I don't play the "GAME" very well either. If I don't like you - I don't talk to you and I will ignore you because you annoy me. If you like to make snide comments boy hmmm I'll pass you straight!!! - especially since I don't fit in to your circle!! That's a typical work day for me... If I like you we'll talk and maybe smile at each other.
Every one else are back stabbing losers who I ignore just as they ignore me!!

As you can see I worse than you!! lol I have a friend - she smiles all the time and finds something in common or at least talks to every one... especially when she talks to those I dislike - I FIND THAT AMAZING!! She is totally nice.

I've come to the point were I will be quiet and keep my business to my self. I don't know any advice to give you except maybe try not to study it too much. Not every one will get you but you can try to talk to some of them - not by letting all your private stuff out but by talking to them about themselves!! Maybe that will help??

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a little here...and a little there

Sunday, October 17, 2010

Well I have taken 2 days off this last week from working out and today I am happy to say I walked around the mall for more than an hour, I did not sit down or eat I went from store to store trying on outfits and planning what I want to buy next time I get some$$. I also took the time to reevaluate my diet and see how I can eat right without feeling deprived and without all the calories. I have been feeling down for quite some time. I have areas in my life I can't keep ignoring, I have to start getting out there, meeting people, despite my insecurities and fears. I just don't know where to start. I have to be able to do something for free. Money is tight, I scrimp & save just for the basics. Mostly I have to be able to start making excercise a regular thing for me, not just once in a while. I took the turning 40 challenge and I plan to keep it.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SWEETMOMMY41 10/17/2010 10:53PM

  walking is a great exercise that can be done for free. i know what it is like to have to scrimp and save for the basics. it is not easy. it can be done. i am glad to hear that you are making exercise a regular thing for yourself. that is important. you have to take care of yourself. you can do this! you are worth it! i am here for you anytime you need some support,motivation or encouragement!

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10-10-10 ... a time for miracles

Sunday, October 10, 2010

Today is a very significant day. The number 10 symbolizes the completeness of God. I am praying for a miracle, losing weight has been my life's biggest challenge, it affects every area of my life. I have not been consistent with anything but as the temperatures change and the holidays approaching I am going to work hard to lose weight this season. I went to Macy's after church was saddening to see all the lumbs and bumps showing through, all the clothes I want to wear I have to put aside because they look terrible on me. I can only imagine what clothes will look like on me when I have lost this weight. Til then I am going to work on what I can do, move around, and try not to eat late at night. Do a little bit of walking everyday and see what comes around. I am 39 yrs old this year and I have spent the last 27 yrs struggling with being overweight. I hope to make my 40's and beyond alot better and hopefully alot happier than my 20's & 30's, which was nothing but a sad disappointment for me. emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHUBALUBA2 10/16/2010 9:21PM

    The # 10 also signifies God's grace, which is a consistent source of hope in our lives. Despite the fact that we are naval lint and don't deserve anything, God sees us as worth saving. I could cry after reading this blog. You sound so defeated. My weight has been a struggle for many years too, and if I focus on the # on the scale, I AM a failure. But, there's much that I've done in my life, much that I've accomplished, much to be thankful for, and much to be blessed with. This negative self talk isn't going to spark you into action. It's going to weigh you down, make you even more depressed, and more than likely cause you to comfort yourself with a half a gallon of ice cream. Focus on some of the positive things in your life. Focus on the blessings, on the good. God doesn't make junk. Hold your head up high. You are a child of the King of Kings. If you think of things in those terms, how can you get that downtrodden over some chub rolls that show up in a blouse? Smile, girlfriend. God loves you, and so do I. :)

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