SPIRALDANCER   6,806
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Mixed Bag

Wednesday, June 26, 2013

So I am back in Wales after a week at home in England with my Mum. Was lovely to see her but really wish we didn't live so far apart. I really miss her but know I have to live my own life, can't stay home forever. She's coming up to visit soon though, looking forward to that as it will be my graduation too.
Had a nice surprise when I went home, went shopping with Mum for some new jeans (a task that is normally horrific) and was very pleased to find I have gone down a size :) The scales may be stubbornly staying put but it appears my shape is changing and becoming more toned, little positive changes seem to be working.
I continue to struggle with my mood. My depression seems to be getting the better of me at the moment but I'm not going to let in win overall. Just wish I could feel more motivated and want to do things, I feel like I want to sleep all the time at the moment. So frustrating, I've fallen behind on y running programme too but today is a new day and the only way from here is up!!
On the positive, I went horse riding last night and had a show jumping lesson with Albert. It went so well, jumped a spread and a bounce fence, amazed it went so well, been a long time coming but starting to have a fragile confidence that I can do it. MY horses really are my best friends, they make everything better.
Never surrender, Never give up!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TWEETYKC00 6/26/2013 7:18AM

    I am glad you had a good time with your mom, it can be so important to keep in touch with family. Keep on going, I know you can make things happen!

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On the Up

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Had a really good day yesterday. Spent the morning riding around Cosmeston lakes with my friend's horse Spot. He's a 17.2 percheron x appalossa and is a gentle giant. I was really lucky as the weather has been very changable here in Wales, we managed nearly the whole ride in the dry but the heavens opened just as we were on the road home, never mind we still had a good time and got to enjoy the beautiful views and have a good canter or two.
Was good to spend time with friends too, my friend's horse Jack is only 5 and he was very excited on our hack but was helped by having three older horses with him. He's such a little cutie.
Came home after riding and was supposed to get ready for a friend's BBQ. However, my current medication has the side effect of making me really tired and I ended up falling asleep for a while. Normally I would have used this as an excuse not to go out as I'm not great with company at the moment. however decided not to give in to that temptation, walked over to my friends and actually had a really good evening. Pleased at pushing myself to go out and socialise. It was definitely worth it.
Now for today and having to pack to go home to see family. It's for unfortunate reasons, I have a funeral to attend but am just hoping I can get through it without getting too low. Fingers crossed, be good to see my family.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MYGOLDENBOYS3 6/17/2013 9:07AM

    Hope your trip home is good. Glad to see you back! emoticon

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TWEETYKC00 6/16/2013 10:21AM

    I am glad you had a good time, you deserved it. Hugs.

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GHOSTFLAMES 6/16/2013 6:32AM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Having a rough day :(

Friday, June 14, 2013

Not feeling good today. My medication is giving me side effects and feel dizzy all the time, the doctor says this will pass but it's really not helping my mood. I have no motivation right now and feel so deflated. This is just so frustrating.

Supposed to be going running today but the weather is horrid and I so don't feel like it...really should go but maybe I'll do an indoor work out instead. Just want to feel better :(

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KAT321123 6/14/2013 10:13AM

    I hope you feel better. It's definitely tough to find motivation when you're not feeling well, particularly feeling dizzy! Maybe exercising would distract you from the yucky feeling, if you don't have a medical reason not to exercise?


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GRAMMY_22 6/14/2013 8:34AM

    I hope that you're feeling better real soon.

emoticon

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Running, Week 1 Completed :)

Wednesday, June 12, 2013

I am really pretty pleased right now as i have just completed the first week of my rookie running program on sparkpeople. Its something I've wanted to do for a long time but due to a re-currant knee problem kept getting held back. Looks like my knee is holding up ok so far and made it through the first week, now for week 2 and continued enthusiasm, hope it goes well.

Loving the fact that exercise is giving me a buzz rather than making me exhausted. Feel good about this achievement :)

emoticon

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SWEETNEEY 6/12/2013 7:47AM

    emoticon

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DMEYER4 6/12/2013 6:46AM

  great job. keep up the good work. Have a great day

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BLUENOSE63 6/12/2013 6:45AM

  Just remember to take it slow and build up your endurance even when you feel like you could run miles! This will avoid running injuries

Good luck!

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TWEETYKC00 6/12/2013 6:43AM

    That is great! Keep up the good work!

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Back Again.

Sunday, June 09, 2013

Well, I seem to be here on and off, about time I got serious about loosing weight and staying committed to it. Motivation is something I really struggle with but I am determined to succeed this time despite my depression and low drive. I have recently decided that exercise is my friend in terms of lifting mood and have taken on the challenge of the rookie running programme on here. it's early days but really hope to keep this running thing going.

Other recent changes include a change in relationship status. I'm single for the first time in a long time, but feel good about this. Sometimes we just have to do what is right for us even if others see it as a selfish decision. The upside of this is that I now have more time to spend with my horses and I can be boss of what I'm eating without being judged for it. I have now reverted to a vegetarian diet and I try to eat a vegan diet three times a week. have to admit I feel so much better for cutting out meat.

So the upshoot is overall, now is the time for me to shine and truely be myself.....here goes :)

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GHOSTFLAMES 6/9/2013 5:54AM

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