Sunday, March 25, 2012
I never thought I could say this again but I am finally free from my sugar addiction. Last Sunday I had a bad cold and didn't even leave the house. I ached from head to toe and knew a great deal of my feeling so lousy lately had been just because I was living almost on sugar. I was getting embarrassed by telling people I was on a diet and then pigging out on junk and gaining weight. So, I decided it was time to get it together. I ate only 1 tablespoon of sugar on Sunday and Monday. Cut down to 1/2 Tbsp the rest of the week. I went and bought a bag of Splenda and told myself that when the sugar bowl was empty, there would be no more sugar in this house. I ran out of my last 1/2 Tbsp yesterday. The great thing is I don't even miss the sugar! I used a small amount of splenda this morning in my coffee and a small amount in my iced tea this afternoon.
We always have bagels and donuts at church on Sunday mornings. I have never had the will power to not give in. Today I took a banana and my yogurt and didn't even want any of the sugary stuff. Actually, just the smell of it almost made me sick. A couple people teased me and tried to get me to cave in but I didn't. Boy were they shockied!
I am feeling so much better. By Wednesday my joints were feeling better and I even went for a 2.5 mile walk this week. Two weeks ago it hurt just to do what I had to at work. Yesterday I cleaned out my storage shed which was a mess and today I raked up 15 bags of leaves.
The last check on Friday I was down almost 3 pounds already. Just cutting out sugar and the bad foods. I only went over calories one day this week and I believe that was Sunday. I finally realized it was a horrible circle and until I decided enough was enough, it was just going to get worse. I truly seeing myself at my goal weight by August and seeing me as the "hot" preacher lady when I do the big wedding on the 18th em>334.gif" alt="emoticon" width="42" height="42" border="0"> .
Oh, one other crazy awesome thing that happened this week was that as a Life Enrichment Coordinator in a retirement community, I have to plan and implement the fun, crazy activities. We decided to have a jelly bean guessing contest. My assistant and I counted out over 4500 jelly beans. I didn't eat one! We also had to stuff easter eggs with candy, which set on my desk in large quantitiesw ALL DAY. I didn't even eat one, or really even want one. That not only shocked me, it shocked everyone I work with, as they all come to me when they want candy because I always have a basket full for residents when they stop by. I have moved the candy basket out of my office just to be on the safe side though.
I have written a book but just wanted to show how serious I really am this time. I can and I will prove that I can do anything I set my mind to and that I am a winner!
Monday, October 24, 2011
I am wanting to get this last 20 pounds off and the goal was to do it by January 1. Well, it's not impossible I guess but at the rate I've been going this year, I just don't see it happening. Do I sound discouraged? I guess maybe I am.
I have moved this past month and the adjustment to a whole different way of life is difficult for me to adapt too. I do think eventually it will be easier but for now it is taking some getting used to. I am committed to this lifestyle "downsizing" for at least the next year. I know that it will help me grow mentally and spiritually but these "growth pains" aren't exactly fun at the moment and just trying to eat right and get in my exercise is difficult.
Things have been so hectic the last 6 months. Working two, pretty physically challenging jobs has taken a big toll on my body and mind. Praise God, I will hopefully be starting a new job within the next month that will be much better hours and not nearly as difficult on my body. Plus I won't be working different hours constantly and having to get up in the middle of the night to get to work.
I am one of those people who can "go with the flow" but I still need some semblance of routine. I haven't had that in so long and it's really starting to wear on me. When I was successful when I lost the 30 pounds before, I had a fairly consistant routine and could work my food and exercise in pretty well most of the time. Now I just manage to get through each day and grab a couple of hours sleep before it's time to go again.
Thanks to SP, I have managed to stay within only 5 pounds at the most of my lowest weight. I'm trying to cut out the soda, eating out and stress eating. It's so difficult to not just grab something on my way home when I'm totally worn out. No one but me seems to care if I lose weight or get into shape. There is literally no support. It's so discouraging. Most days I start out with good intentions but as the day goes on, I just give up and tell myself it's just not worth the hassle. I know I need to change this mindset.
Okay, I guess I'm just rambling now but I needed to get it all out so maybe, just maybe, tomorrow I can start out fresh again and begin finding new ways to get back on track. I have had so many wonderful blessings the last few weeks and yet I am still giving up on myself. I need to get it through my thick head that God wouldn't have given me these gifts if I didn't deserve them. So now I need to start takig care of myself and giving back.
Thanks for letting me vent tonight. Thanks for being here for me SP. Things will get better and I will eventually get motivated again. I just need to learn to put as much time into myself sometimes as I do others.
Tomorrow is another blessed and wonderful gift from God. Lets not waste it. God Bless!
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