Monday, October 22, 2012
I've been trying to blog all week, but it's been a whirlwind. Lot's of great stuff going on here. Fall is definitely here, wearing jackets most days. Lot's of soup and chilli! Leaves, mist, crispness and pumpkins everywhere the eye can see. I love it. Tim starts back to work tomorrow. As usual I have mixed emotions. I will miss him, but am excited to get back on track financially. Our car that was stolen a week ago was found the day before yesterday with only a little damage. I felt very blessed when I got the call to come pick it up. We also paid off our other car, six years of payments behind us, finally! Feels really, really good.
Went on a nice 2.5 mile walk with my sister today. We've started a little routine of her spending Saturday nights with us. She's been here all day today also and I'll take her home tomorrow. It's so wonderful to be spending time with her. The older she gets the more we have to talk about, and we have a lot in common.
Haven't had much money to do grocery shopping, so my new recipe adventures have been put on hold for this week. I'm OK with that. I have alot of ideas for winter dishes, breads, soups, and warm salads that I want to try soon. I am doing a butternut pie for Thanksgiving, I can't wait to make it.
My special visitor is here this week, so I've been a bit bloated and somewhat cranky. I've kept up with my exercise pretty well, walk/jogging 4 days, and one really good ST session. I'm not losing any weight, but I'm not gaining either. I do notice that I feel stronger though. I was talking to my mother about this health journey, and she had the best advice............just don't give up. I think I'm finally to the point that I'm not too worried about a deadline of any kind. I'm pretty happy with just getting my alotted fit mins in each week. My eating leaves a lot to be desired. I haven't been tracking everyday, and many days that I do track, I go over my maximum limit, sometimes just a little, sometimes a lot.
I've been drinking a lot of tea lately, substituting it for my coffee cravings. I do still drink one cup of coffe most days, but I'm back to sugar free sweetener and just a little milk or powdered creamer. Not too bad, not great, but I can live with it for today. It sure beats my hot cocoa/coffee I was drinking everyday the last month. That was a quick 150 calories in one cup.
Wow, just noticed Beetlejuice is on! I love it! Holloweenie! I have watched halloweenish movies nearly every night this month. I LOVE Winona Ryder in this one, so great.
OK, gonna get off for tonight. My goals for next week include tracking food everyday, and sticking to calorie range everyday. If I can achieve that this week, I'll be very happy. That and 8-12 cups water EVERYDAY. Some days I seem to "forget" to do this. I love water, so there should be no excuses.
OK lovelies, have a great Monday. I'm thinking of taking some fall pics tomorrow. Photo days always make me so happy. I know I'll need a little pick-me-up with Tim leaving. OK, adios amigos.
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Where to start.............whew I'm exhausted! Well Saturday after work, I came home to a houseful of family. I cooked for everyone, and my sister stayed over to go with us to church on Sunday. I managed to do pretty well with dinner, making mashed cauliflower, a squash and bell peppers medley and panko breaded and baked chicken breasts. Everyone was pleased and I was pretty happy with the calorie equation that day. My sister and I stayed up watching TV and chatting for ahwile, it's always very nice to spend time with her. I woke up pretty early on Sunday and got a nice jog in before the hubs and sis woke up. That was nice. I felt pretty great.............UNTIL we walked to the car to leave for church and noticed that one of our cars was missing. My first instinct was that it had been towed, which would have been financially annoying, but nothing too terrible. Well, after a few hours of mystery solving, we found out it was not towed, but stolen. Yikes, definitely not what we needed. I got pretty bummed out for the rest of Sunday. Lot's of "why's" and "what did I do to deserve this" going on. This is the second car we've had stolen since we moved to the Sacramento area. So, after a long day of being downright bummed and sad, I decided I wasn't going to let the whole weekend be ruined.
My attitude today has been pretty good, considering the happenings. I went to the local consignment clothes store and found a skirt/top combo that I was eyeballing a few weeks back that was originally priced at $20.oo.............today it was down to $2.00! I had to get it! I know, I know, drowing my sorrows in shopping is probably not the best thing, but I only spent $4.00 total on my goodies...........that's less than a fast food meal, and that is how I used to drown my sorrows, I'm thinking this was better. Plus the outfit I bought I originally thought would be too small for me. It is a one size fits all, and the skirt looks quite small, but it fit well, and is so cute! Glad I didn't spend $20.oo on it!
After my mini purchase fun, I picked Grandpa up and took him to downtown Sacramento for a doctors appt. We got there at 1:00 and did't leave until after 3:30, that was kind of a bummer part of the day. But we did get to spend a bit of fun time together. I always love it when it's just me and him and we can talk about whatever we want. I love my Grandpa so much. We got home, and he really wanted pizza. I allowed this because he lives in an assisted living place where they don't get things like pizza and brownies.............which is what he wanted, and he's 86, so he get's whatever he wants when he's with me. I just took him home a little while ago, and have been sitting here thinking about taking a quick walk around the block............but it's after 9:30, and I'm just not sure if that's a good idea tonight or not. I'm pretty pooped out.
So that was my weekend. Not exactly great, but I'm not letting it get me too down. I think I might have enough energy tonight for a quick SP cardio session, and I am already planning tomorrow mornings jog. After this weekend, going back to work will be relaxing! I've really been sooo busy these last few days.
One good way to look at things is, with a weekend like this, the week can only get better from here..........I hope!!!
Love you guys, hope your weeks are filled with healthy choices that make you proud.........that is what I am hoping for myself, and I think I have a good chance to turn that hope into reality!
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Lately I've been turning my desperation to be healthier into curious searching time. I've found the best articles on here. Great ideas on how to eat according to season, and how to find little ways here and there to burn calories without having to run 10 miles/day. I admit, it is a completely different way to look at life than the way I've lived for nearly a 33 years. But it is a way to look at life that I've always dreamed of. I've wanted purpose and fullness, variety and spice, goals and spark. I've wanted these things and had absolutely no idea how to get them. I am nowhere near reaching my goal of living a fully sparked life, but I feel a source of strength growing steadily inside that keeps me believing that I can and I will have the life I deserve......one little decision at a time.
It's funny. I've went from coming home at night without having dinner planned and just scraping things together, to planning nearly the whole week ahead of time. In fact, I'm so excited to try new recipes that I can't wait for this week to be gone so I can plan next weeks meals! Heee, kind of funny! I am loving the new flavors and simplicity of some of the recipes I've tried. I thought tasty/healthy cooking was much harder than this! One thing I'm not quite used to yet is plugging in and calculating my own numbers on new or revamped recipes. I know this is crucial to my success, I'm just not used to it. I'm such a cook as I go kind of cook, I'm not that great with recipes.........getting better, but I still go off the cuff a bit. But I'm seeing that it is really important to be specific about measurements if I am going to be accurate about calories consumed. I'm also having a little trouble figuring out portions for things like soup/stew/chilli, etc. It is hard to know what the finished meal is portion wise of a liquid, without measuring it all into another container as you go. Which is obviously the way to do it, I'm just coming to terms with the full reality of mindfulness in regards to eating consciously. One step at a time. It is painfully obvious that not being mindful leads down very wild and scary roads for me. Being mindful may be difficult right now, but it is definitley more the road I want to ride, than the path to self destuction I've been on for so long now.
I have not done any lap swimming at the local pool yet, but I've thought of it everyday since I heard about it. It turns out the client that told me about his aerobics class is an enemy of sorts of my mother's best friend. Guess I'll stay away from his class for now, this town is too small sometimes!! I still have the option to go work out at a local apartment complex's gym. I'm looking forward to that during the rainy months. I think it could be a really great option this winter. I also mapped out a perfect 2 mile jog last night. It is a well lighted, smooth and easy path. I jogged as much as I could last night, wich was just about half of it. I am planning to push for more and more jogging as time goes by, until I can jog the entire thing. I will be sooo happy when that day comes!!! My goal is to be able to jog a 5K without stopping.............maybe even a couple of days a week. I feel so good after jogging, I feel like I am really doing something good for my heart. I don't especially love it while I'm doing it, but afterwards I almost always feel great. So hopefully I can get those 2 miles in most of the days this week and a little ST and see how I feel. I am really focusing on mantaining versus progressing right now.I am one of those people that thinks that a weeks worth of effort should lead to a marathon. Of course I am not capable of this, so I get disappointed, and then I fail to maintain effort. I am not patient, and over estimate my personal expectations for myself constantly. So, patience, maintenance, consistency, these are all my new best freinds. I am trying to be happy working on these things while I learn how to work the calories in/out equation to benefit my health needs.
I am really looking forward to working in some fall/winter fruits/veggies into my meal plans. I LOVE winter squash like acorn and butternut. I also really like root veggies, especially beets......yummm! I read that apples and grapes are among this seasons fruits, which are two things I consume on a regular basis year round.
This season has such great things to offer us if we take the time to appreciate it's bounty. I am really gearing myself up to have a great winter season. I have a tendency to get blue in the winter, but I really want to fight it with a passion this year. I think with the help of SP and my lovely sparkfriends, I just might have a fighting chance this year. This time last year, I found out I was pregnant, and thus the begining of the end of my wistful weight loss plans! This is a better year, I can feel it!
Cheers to all of us brave and beautiful warriors. Let's burn this flame so wild, so free and so fierce that everyone (including ourselves) can see and be motivated for positive change!!!
Sunday, October 07, 2012
It's funny, I know I'm not supposed to beat myself up, but it is hard not to. Went to my mom's last night, she had tons of goodies that I love, I was starving, it was after work, and I went wild. So wild I have no idea how to count all the calories I ate. Ever since then I have felt terrible. I feel bloated, sick, no energy, and sad. Of course I had to weigh myself, and it was 2.6 pounds over in one day. I can't believe I ate THAT much! That's like 8500 calories or somthing! I am sure it was a lot of salt, and not enough water drinking. It was bad, that's all I can say. And it wasn't premeditated, it just happened. I was talking, and eating, and talking and eating. By the time dinner was served, I wasn't even really that hungry, which I should have stopped there, but no, I ate dinner. Then icecream. All around it was terribly bad. And I've tried to make ammends today, but I didn't start off good at all, and we took my little sister to church and then out to lunch. I tried to do what I thought was OK for lunch, but you never know when you eat out what you are really consuming. So, somehow, I've got to learn how to deal with event/weekend eating. I am not too mad at myself, more like, how in the world did that happen? It was my normal eating patterns, so that is why it seems like it's not that big of a deal. But, of course, it is my normal eating patterns that got me to the weight/health I have now. So, I'm a little bummed. I did manage to get a walk in yesterday, despite the overeating, and I've got one in today. So I'm not giving up, I just feel really bogged down. Two steps forward, three steps back kind of thing. And I keep thinking, if I could just exercise harder and longer these little set backs wouldn't be suck a big deal, but I feel like I'm doing the very best I can, without knocking myself out. So, hopefully I can chock yesterday up as experience in the real world, and learn how to better equip myself for similar situations. Especially with the holidays coming up, I'm going to need to do something, or else it's going to be a long, weight gaining time, and I don't need or want that. I guess what really hurts me about yesterday is I see just how fragile I really am, and how much hard work I really have to do. I wish I was already on top of the mountain of success, but unfortunately, I'm at the bottom, and the climb is looking pretty trecharous today. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day?
Thursday, October 04, 2012
Wow, I'm a little amazed with todays events. Three clients came in today with information about cheap/free exercise options that are available to me that I didn't even know about. The first one told me that she has a little gym in her apartment complex and she uses it regularly and invited me to come over whenever I wanted to work out with her, very sweet. The next lady told me about the pool!! Yeah, I can't beleive I didn't know about this before, but there is a local pool with year round lap swim for a very small fee. And the last was a client that teaches weekly aerobics classes including yoga, wieght training and cardio in 1.5 hour sessions. I am really excited. I was afraid that over the winter, with all the rain, my outside exercise routine would fall apart and I'd be a little lost without good fitness options. But it looks like my fears were for nothing. I can't afford a gym membership right now, but after today, looks like I won't need one. I am so pleasantly surprised and excited about all the new options presented today. If I team these options with a few good workout videos, I should be just fine. Now I really have no excuses to not keep the spark burning throughout the winter months. I feel very blessed.
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