Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Lately I've been turning my desperation to be healthier into curious searching time. I've found the best articles on here. Great ideas on how to eat according to season, and how to find little ways here and there to burn calories without having to run 10 miles/day. I admit, it is a completely different way to look at life than the way I've lived for nearly a 33 years. But it is a way to look at life that I've always dreamed of. I've wanted purpose and fullness, variety and spice, goals and spark. I've wanted these things and had absolutely no idea how to get them. I am nowhere near reaching my goal of living a fully sparked life, but I feel a source of strength growing steadily inside that keeps me believing that I can and I will have the life I deserve......one little decision at a time.
It's funny. I've went from coming home at night without having dinner planned and just scraping things together, to planning nearly the whole week ahead of time. In fact, I'm so excited to try new recipes that I can't wait for this week to be gone so I can plan next weeks meals! Heee, kind of funny! I am loving the new flavors and simplicity of some of the recipes I've tried. I thought tasty/healthy cooking was much harder than this! One thing I'm not quite used to yet is plugging in and calculating my own numbers on new or revamped recipes. I know this is crucial to my success, I'm just not used to it. I'm such a cook as I go kind of cook, I'm not that great with recipes.........getting better, but I still go off the cuff a bit. But I'm seeing that it is really important to be specific about measurements if I am going to be accurate about calories consumed. I'm also having a little trouble figuring out portions for things like soup/stew/chilli, etc. It is hard to know what the finished meal is portion wise of a liquid, without measuring it all into another container as you go. Which is obviously the way to do it, I'm just coming to terms with the full reality of mindfulness in regards to eating consciously. One step at a time. It is painfully obvious that not being mindful leads down very wild and scary roads for me. Being mindful may be difficult right now, but it is definitley more the road I want to ride, than the path to self destuction I've been on for so long now.
I have not done any lap swimming at the local pool yet, but I've thought of it everyday since I heard about it. It turns out the client that told me about his aerobics class is an enemy of sorts of my mother's best friend. Guess I'll stay away from his class for now, this town is too small sometimes!! I still have the option to go work out at a local apartment complex's gym. I'm looking forward to that during the rainy months. I think it could be a really great option this winter. I also mapped out a perfect 2 mile jog last night. It is a well lighted, smooth and easy path. I jogged as much as I could last night, wich was just about half of it. I am planning to push for more and more jogging as time goes by, until I can jog the entire thing. I will be sooo happy when that day comes!!! My goal is to be able to jog a 5K without stopping.............maybe even a couple of days a week. I feel so good after jogging, I feel like I am really doing something good for my heart. I don't especially love it while I'm doing it, but afterwards I almost always feel great. So hopefully I can get those 2 miles in most of the days this week and a little ST and see how I feel. I am really focusing on mantaining versus progressing right now.I am one of those people that thinks that a weeks worth of effort should lead to a marathon. Of course I am not capable of this, so I get disappointed, and then I fail to maintain effort. I am not patient, and over estimate my personal expectations for myself constantly. So, patience, maintenance, consistency, these are all my new best freinds. I am trying to be happy working on these things while I learn how to work the calories in/out equation to benefit my health needs.
I am really looking forward to working in some fall/winter fruits/veggies into my meal plans. I LOVE winter squash like acorn and butternut. I also really like root veggies, especially beets......yummm! I read that apples and grapes are among this seasons fruits, which are two things I consume on a regular basis year round.
This season has such great things to offer us if we take the time to appreciate it's bounty. I am really gearing myself up to have a great winter season. I have a tendency to get blue in the winter, but I really want to fight it with a passion this year. I think with the help of SP and my lovely sparkfriends, I just might have a fighting chance this year. This time last year, I found out I was pregnant, and thus the begining of the end of my wistful weight loss plans! This is a better year, I can feel it!
Cheers to all of us brave and beautiful warriors. Let's burn this flame so wild, so free and so fierce that everyone (including ourselves) can see and be motivated for positive change!!!
Sunday, October 07, 2012
It's funny, I know I'm not supposed to beat myself up, but it is hard not to. Went to my mom's last night, she had tons of goodies that I love, I was starving, it was after work, and I went wild. So wild I have no idea how to count all the calories I ate. Ever since then I have felt terrible. I feel bloated, sick, no energy, and sad. Of course I had to weigh myself, and it was 2.6 pounds over in one day. I can't believe I ate THAT much! That's like 8500 calories or somthing! I am sure it was a lot of salt, and not enough water drinking. It was bad, that's all I can say. And it wasn't premeditated, it just happened. I was talking, and eating, and talking and eating. By the time dinner was served, I wasn't even really that hungry, which I should have stopped there, but no, I ate dinner. Then icecream. All around it was terribly bad. And I've tried to make ammends today, but I didn't start off good at all, and we took my little sister to church and then out to lunch. I tried to do what I thought was OK for lunch, but you never know when you eat out what you are really consuming. So, somehow, I've got to learn how to deal with event/weekend eating. I am not too mad at myself, more like, how in the world did that happen? It was my normal eating patterns, so that is why it seems like it's not that big of a deal. But, of course, it is my normal eating patterns that got me to the weight/health I have now. So, I'm a little bummed. I did manage to get a walk in yesterday, despite the overeating, and I've got one in today. So I'm not giving up, I just feel really bogged down. Two steps forward, three steps back kind of thing. And I keep thinking, if I could just exercise harder and longer these little set backs wouldn't be suck a big deal, but I feel like I'm doing the very best I can, without knocking myself out. So, hopefully I can chock yesterday up as experience in the real world, and learn how to better equip myself for similar situations. Especially with the holidays coming up, I'm going to need to do something, or else it's going to be a long, weight gaining time, and I don't need or want that. I guess what really hurts me about yesterday is I see just how fragile I really am, and how much hard work I really have to do. I wish I was already on top of the mountain of success, but unfortunately, I'm at the bottom, and the climb is looking pretty trecharous today. Maybe tomorrow will be a better day?
Thursday, October 04, 2012
Wow, I'm a little amazed with todays events. Three clients came in today with information about cheap/free exercise options that are available to me that I didn't even know about. The first one told me that she has a little gym in her apartment complex and she uses it regularly and invited me to come over whenever I wanted to work out with her, very sweet. The next lady told me about the pool!! Yeah, I can't beleive I didn't know about this before, but there is a local pool with year round lap swim for a very small fee. And the last was a client that teaches weekly aerobics classes including yoga, wieght training and cardio in 1.5 hour sessions. I am really excited. I was afraid that over the winter, with all the rain, my outside exercise routine would fall apart and I'd be a little lost without good fitness options. But it looks like my fears were for nothing. I can't afford a gym membership right now, but after today, looks like I won't need one. I am so pleasantly surprised and excited about all the new options presented today. If I team these options with a few good workout videos, I should be just fine. Now I really have no excuses to not keep the spark burning throughout the winter months. I feel very blessed.
Thursday, October 04, 2012
When I was jog/walking tonight, I was really pushing it on the last few blocks before I got home. I passed a man, that I initially didn't notice, but I had to glance over after he said to me, "That's the way you do it! Go! Just do it!" Haaaa, that is the second time, since I've joined SP that a random person on the street has made a positive comment about my exercising.......I don't really know how to take it, except to smile and keep on pushing hard! It really made me happy that some random person took a second to encourage me, pretty cool. I remember last year when I was pushing hard on my bike ride one day and the lady said, "Look at you, go, go, GO!" I love this town!
I am in the losing game again. After last weeks potato/cheese/bacon soup I made for Grandpa, I'd gained a few pounds back. I really couldn't resist eating it, and it was obviously far higher in calories than I anticipated. So now I'm a few ounces from being at my original 6 pound loss. Which is good. It always feels good to see the scale going in the right direction. I've cut my night snacks down to apples and carrots for now, which seems to be going well. I've also stuck to a midafternoon snack of a handful of peanuts. It seems to do the trick, and doesn't break the bank calorie wise. Baby steps. I've also been able to get ST in nearly every other night, even if it's only 10 minutes.....it still feels good to work on my strength building activities. And everyday after an ST night, I feel it in the muscles I was working, so I guess I'm doing something right.
The pants I bought two weeks ago that fit pretty snug, were about to fall off today. I think it is because I'd worn them a bit yesterday, but I've done that in the past with pants and they are still as tight as can be. So I take that as a good sign. I have seen little glimpses of change in the shape of my stomache at a side glance, and also the celluclite on my legs seems to be a little bit smoother. I dont know if it's in my head or not..............but I'm taking it as a sign of progress.
I have bottles that are exactly 36 ounces, so I fill them up twice a day, gauranteeing my 8 cups of water. I always feel better when I am making sure I get my water needs met. Also, I know this is a strange topic, but my elimination processes seems to be regulating, which always is a good sign to me that things are moving more smoothly in my body.
I've been eating LOTS of fruit and veggies. It really is so great when I focus on that. I really feel better, and the full flavor of fresh produce beats anything that comes out of a box anytime. The local grocery store has been carrying a lot of end of the season produce. I've picked up some unbelievable heirloom tomatoes and very sweet bell peppers there this last week from local farms. I really love living in an agricultural haven.
This Saturday is the Hoes Down celebration. Last year was the first time I was able to go, and I had such a wonderful time. I'm really looking forward to it again this year. I might even work up enough courage to do some Contra dancing. Don't know if you have ever seen it, but it's wonderful to watch and looks sooo fun to do. I'm trying to talk everyone I know into going with me, I don't have any definite affirmatives yet, we'll see as the week winds down if I get any takers. It is really a wonderful festival, held in the heart of Capay Valley. Lots of fresh organic goodies, wines, jams, and loads of handmade goods of every kind. I am getting excited just thinking of it. I don't have much money to spend, but just seeing all the goodness is inpsiring.
The debates got me into a bit of a funk, I really don't like politics. I try to ignore it most of the time, but during election time it is hard. It doesn't help that I work with the public and everyone wants to talk about it. I try to stay out of it, because it really causes nothing but problems. But, I do have my opinions, I am still human, last I checked, and I just want a good future, like everyone else.
Well, hopefully a little ST will take my mind off of the rumbling political debates. I hope you all have a great second half of your week. I plan on pushing hard.....maybe I'll get another random compliment!
Monday, October 01, 2012
Well, started my day off with a jog.......it didn't feel good, at all, and I only jogged about half of the 1.3 mile route. I really had the intention of doing the whole thing, but alas, I had to walk half of it. BUT something really interesting happened when I got home. Since I started early, I had finished the jog/walk, breakfast and morning chores all by 9:00, which on my Sunday(Monday) is practically unheard of. It isn't rare (without sparking) for me to sleep until 11:00 or later, and lounge most of the rest of the day. Which is actually OK with me, if I've had a really hard week, since it is my only day off to do that. But today, at 9:00 in the morning, with my days meals already planned and prepped, I decided to go online to look for hiking trails in my county. My brother told me of a site he uses, and that supposedly there is a nearby trail that leads to a waterfall!! Yeah, a waterfall, that is about like seeing a unicorn for this desert rat girl............I'm still getting used to living around natural water, and it's already been 6 years up here. So, I went to the closest hike, which was the waterfall one. But once I got there, it was soooo hot, and it was a 6 mile hike, there and back. So I decided to go up the road a bit to see if I could find something along the creek that I wanted to walk around. I ended up at Camp Haswell, a lovely little stop on the road that I found a few years back and haven't been to since.
View of a spot in the creek where it widens.....must come back for swim sometime
This is the inside of the lone building on site.......kinda spooky. This shot is getting me in the mood for Halloween.
As I was walking I began to smell the fresh, unmistakable aroma of mint. I had to harvest a bit.......which I used in my lunch when I got home!
Another ode to the spooky month........I call it Skull Rock.
One of the few signs of fall. Most of the plants down by the creek were actually budding!
Sweet little deer I saw while I was exploring.
Such a lovely day, it was warmer than expected for October, and oh, so lovely out there.
Was soooo hungry when I got home, after nearly 4 hours out there, so I made my new fave, thai chicken, but instead of the called for basil, I used the wild mint I found...........super good.
Then when I got home, I STILL had energy. So I started getting things ready for dinner. I had a whole chicken and cut it up myself, which was much cheaper than buying the pieces already cut up. I made enough chicken/veggie soup for this weeks lunches. I turned the wings of the chicken into spicy wings, for a nice snack, or lunch with fruit and salad. I LOVE hot wings, but I can eat way too many, so I figured if I just did those two, it would be good.......no way to binge if I only have two! I BBQ'd the breasts for dinner, and made it with ranch green beans, and garlic brown/wild rice. I have enough chicken left over from what we didn't eat to make chicken salad, and I boiled some eggs for a quick egg salad later this weak.
Amongst all the hiking, photo taking and cooking I did today, I managed to do my laundery and actually clean the kitchen........which shouldn't be a pat on the back moment, but often after I cook a lot, I just let the dished sit for hours, before I finally get around to them, or get my husband to do them. And, as I sit here and type this, I am planning some strength training tonight. I'm in love with the SP workout generator, and really enjoy doing the exercises it's suggests according to what areas of my body I want to work out. Today it is definitely arms, and core..........my arms are getting unruly. They need some serious TLC.
So, that was my day. Even though I'm as broke as I've ever been, and have no idea how I'm going to make ends meet, as usual......... I decided to have a good day, to make the best of what I do have, and I did. I used less that a quarter of a tank on gas during my adventure, and didn't spend any other money today. I'm learning how to do more with less. How to buy the right ingredients that can be used in many ways, and how to spice things up, and change it around, without using packaged, low quality food. I'm learning, and it's exciting. With each day that I choose to say yes to quality food, water and exercise, yes to new recipes, and new exercises, I am saying yes to the life I want, and not the life I've dealt with all these years. I knew I had it in me to live a quality life with energy and spark.............it just took finding this wonderful site and all you wonderful people to teach me exactly how to do it. Love you guys so much. Hope your week is filled with new and inspiring wonders.
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