Thursday, September 27, 2012
I read the most interesting articles on here just now. It was a three parter on the topic of finding the right weight for you. The first article was scientific, dealing with BMI and hip-to-waist ratios. It went into many things like body type, and also how different people burn and store calories differently. It spoke on the differences between societal beauty norms versus our own true personal idea of beauty. But what hit me the hardest was at the end of the last article. It asked, if we lived in a place with no scales, not BMI indexes charts, no media marketing based on cetain body types/shapes how would we determine what weight was ideal for us? In this place the clothes we wear are unisex and do not emphasize any certain body parts. This made me really think. I have to admit, even at the size I am now, I do have certain clothes I wear when I want to feel "sexy". Clothes that show a little cleavage or certain cuts in shirts and dresses that accentuate the positives, and I don't think anything is necessarily wrong with this. But what I did realize is this thinking is not the real reason I want to loose weight. I do not want to look "sexy" or "hot", that is not, and has not ever been my goal, atleast no my main goal. I realized, finally, that the real reason I was to loose weight is because I want to be able to do more things. I want to be able to go on longer hikes, I want to be able to jog atleast 1 whole mile without stopping. I want to be able to do summer activities in a bathing suite/shorts without wondering who is staring at the cellulite on my legs.
Someday I want to go ziplining, now I don't know what the weight limits are, but I imagine I'm pushing the limits, and really, and don't know how comfortable I would be strapped into that little harness, even if it would hold me. I want to live my life to it's fullest, and I feel like I truly can't in many ways. I have watched my brothers be active in so many areas their whole lives. They are both runners/bikers and do amazing things like snowboard, white water rafting, hiking, long distance biking among a variety of other things. I always feel left out when they do many of these things because I am just too large and in many ways get too tired to keep up. I went hiking with the younger brother a few weeks ago and I know he could have gone much futher and faster, but had to lag behind so that he didn't leave me in the dust. I don't want to be the slow, uncoordinated, fat, lazy sister anymore. I want to keep up with my siblings. I am the oldest, but I'm only two years older than the older of my two brothers, six years older than the next and eight years older than my little sister. That is not a huge age gap, but so often I feel a lot older because I'm not as mobile. I actually ache sometimes just from a days work. I get tired easy, my ankles, feet, knees and back hurt, and I am overall just way too inactive and out of shape for my age. I want more out of life, not to be sexy, or look sexy, whatever that is, but to be capable of having a truly active lifestyle. I want to be up for whatever the road holds and not feel like I have to hang behind because I can't keep up.
So, to answer the question, in this world with no scales and no revealing fashion styles to gain attention, I would determine my perfect weight based on what I was capable of doing, and overall how strong I was.I guess this was a big AHAAA moment for me. I never really pinpointed what my exact goal for losing weight was. I mean, even at my wieght now, I sill look in the mirror and think I am really beautiful! Not in a conceited way, I just really love myself and know all the struggles I've seen in life, and am really proud of the woman I am becoming. So, outer appearance alone is not really enough to drive me to the success I truly want. Which is success of having a body that has enough energy and is capable of doing all of the things I want to do in life.........which are far too great to number here. I don't ever see myself wanting to climb Mt. Everest or anything that challenging, but...........honestly, why not? I mean, the sky is the limit, and that is the true goal for my weight loss journey. It's not a number on the scale, or a certain clothes size, it's really a capabilites motivation. When I loose weight, and get stronger, I will be able to do more, and that, my friends, I've learned today, is my true goal!
I am really excited by this blog because this is truly a brand new revelation, and it is the deepest, truest desire I have for wanting a healthy body/lifestyle. I hope you all find your true motivation, it's a really great feeling!!
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
Had a bad eating day today. But I tracked everything I ate, and found out I only went over my daily calorie maximum number by 100 calories, which is really not as bad as I thought. I'm not happy I did this, but I am glad I was able to stop myself from going into full binge mode. I did try to regulate the amount I was eating, even though I knew I shouldn't be eating the things I was eating. I realized that starting my day off with protein is definitely a good thing. I have been eating a small breakfast for the past few days, which leaves my starving by 11:30, and I feel like no matter what I eat I'm really hungry the rest of the day. So, a little here, a little there, trial and error, I am determined to figure all of this out. It is really a daily choice to live healthy, as we all know. Some days I don't want to really be conscious of everything I am putting in my mouth, since emotional overeating has been my method of drug abuse for the last 32 years. But I am really determined to stop it. Even though I am not pleased with todays actions, I am glad that I tracked everything I ate. Usually when I know I've eaten poorly for a day, I just give up tracking and kind of do what I want for that day, feeling defeated and unable to have a "perfect" day. I know healthy choices are not about perfection, but about making good decisions for my health the majority of the time. So, lesson learned for today. No matter how bad the day is, eating wise, it is better to track everything so I can see where I can do better next time. Lesson learned, atleast for today. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.
Tim is leaving town tomorrow morning to go to AZ to pick up our car. I am glad he is getting the car, but I don't want him to leave. I am so enjoying our time together this last month. He will go back to work soon, and with that comes lots of time apart, so I just try to soak all the luvins up while I can. I guess it's a good thing that I like to spend lots of time with the hubs.......it would be terrible if I didn't!
To end this blog on a good note, I did buy a pair of 18 size jeans yesterday, which was great. I am not fully in 18's, because not every pair of 18's fits right, but it did feel good to find a pair that did fit. I know the size is just a number......but it does show me that I am making a little progress already, and that is very encouraging. So, tomorrow is a new day. I might right my bike to work again tomorrow. I rode it yesterday, and it was a very easy way to burn 200 calories. Plus it forced me to stay at work for my lunch break, allowing me to make a little more money, ( I work commission, so the more hair I cut, the more I make.) So, all in all, things are moving in the right direction, one baby step at a time. Oh, and I also found a really yummy sounding new recipe to try, so my one new recipe a week goal is going to happen this week! I already bought the ingredients, and plan to try is tomorrow, thai basil chicken at 279 calories/serving. I love thai food, but have never tried to make it at home, I'm pretty excited to try it. So, what seemed like a pretty bad choices day, is now starting to sound like an overall good choices couple of weeks. It does help to look at the big picture sometimes.............or maybe always!!
Good night dear people. I hope your journey's are full of exciting new revelations on how you can be the best you possible. That is what I hope for myself, and as each day progresses, I truly think I am working to be my best.
Monday, September 24, 2012
I didn't get in fit mins the last two days. But I have been very busy, and enjoying life. So, I don't feel terrible, plus I got a really nice walk in this morning, and I have a good bike ride planned for tonight. I think it's all good. I got to see my nieces on Saturday. It was a quick visit, my brother and SIL were just stopping by. It was wondeful to get those smooches in! My nieces are 4 and 11 months, so you can imagine how scrumptious they are! I also was able to do some haircutting while I was there, including fixing my SIL's new mowhawk. I don't generally do many mowhawks on women, but on her, it really looked incredible! I also tried a new recipe yesterday that was healthy, delicious, and it passed the real test.............my husband liked it!! YAY! It was a standard chicken piccata sauce, used over bakes fish and veggies. It was super wonderful, and easy. Now I want to try lots of new sauces, because I see what a great way that is to change things up, without breaking the bank. I can use that piccata sauce over chicken or fish, and it's super tasty and so easy. So, I informed hubby that it's a new recipe atleast once a week now. And after last nights trial and win............I think he's excited about the idea.
Today I am going to the local junior college to see if I can qualify for some student loans. I figured there must be something good about being poor! I've got to atleast try. I love school and can think of a dozen things I'd like to study. So, may as well give it a try.
Look at that little lovely, I could just snuggle her for eternity.
Sweet, budding morning glory I saw on my walk this morning.
Light to brighten my day.
After I go to the junior college I am bringing my grandpa over for some potato/cheese soup with cornbread, and I'm giving him a pedicure. I don't spend as much time with him as I'd like to, so this will be a great opportunity to chat and get some quality g-pa time in. He has dementia, so his memory is hit and miss. But every once in awhile I get some good stories out of him. ( Especially if I give him a beer or two!)
Well, I hope you all have a great day. Looks like this week will be lovely. It's already started to cool down here pretty significantly. The leaves are falling and it's almost spooky time!!
Thursday, September 20, 2012
I restarted my goals, goal weight, fast breaks goals, everything. I was wondering why my nutrition page was not calculating the calories I needed to eat, then I realized that when I was pregnant I changed all my goals to healthy lifestyle, not weight loss mode. Sooooo, I'm back on track, officially. I'm really glad to have sorted all that out. As of today I am on a year long path to reach my goal weight. I hope I don't stop, no matter what happens. I would love to be looking back a year from now, and be a few sizes smaller, not to mention stronger and healthier. I hope I don't have trouble sticking to my calorie intake! I am set from 1250-1550. I've been eating at about 1400-1600 these last few days. My fit mins are set at 800 calories burned per week, which I've been doing atleast twice that. So, I guess it will all even out, maybe I can slow the fitness down a bit, and curb the calories a bit. We'll see. I'd like to exercise more and eat more.........but I guess that is not the ideal way to reach my goals. When I read The Spark, I calculated on my own that I needed to burn 200 calories per day and eat 1400/day in order to average 1-2 pound loss/week. But I've seen already that if I don't eat the right combo of calories, or not enough for breakfast, I can get really hungry at night. Which is always a very bad thing for me. I am a HUGE nighttime muncher. So I have to find a way to burn steady, and fuel smart. I know it is an equation that will take time to tweak. One day at a time, I'm sure I'll be able to figure what works right for me. What I realized is, as I loose weight, all my calorie in/out equations will change, based on what I weigh. Sooooo, I guess it really is one day at a time!
Do you guys rely on the SP calculators to determine this equation for you? Do you do the suggested calories burned, or do you do more? Less? And calorie intake? Does the suggested set up work for you, or do you calculate your own numbers? I'd like to know from those of you that have had some success what your opinions/experiences are on this?
Time to reasearch!
Have a great evening!
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
I put off coming back to SP for a about a month or so longer than I really had to. I was scared to fail again, and embarrassed to have "given up". After just over a week back, I really don't know what took me so long. It is never too soon to be happy. I really haven't pushed myself in any area this week. I'm not starving, I'm not running till I drop. I'm just doing what I feel is right and it's working already. I lost 6 pounds this first week. Now, I know that water weight.....teamed with being on (and now off) my period have a lot to do with the situation. But I haven't lost weight since I stopped logging on to SP 5 months ago. And suddenly, after a week on here, I loose 6 pounds. It seems pretty clear that I need all the things this community offers in order to reach my healthy lifestyle goals.
I was talkng on the phone last night to my best freind, and had no concept of time during the conversation. I ended up walking 3 miles, and burning 400 calories, without even noticing. So I think I might start calling friends while I'm walking more often. It is a really nice way to pass the time.
I had the best Swai fish the other night. It was lightly breaded in panko bread crumbs, seasoned with lemon pepper, salt, pepper and dill and lightly fried in a teaspoon of olive oil. It was so great, so fast and so simple. I loved it. I think it tasted better than fried chicken, and I LOVE fried chicken! What I liked is it wasn't swimming in oil, I used just enough to help brown the outsides, and help it not stick to the pan. If I had a cooking spray, I would have used that instead. It is truly awesome how I become what I surround myself with. Just logging on here each day, and reading a few blogs and articles has helped me see how little changes here and there really add up and help to create the blanced life I've been craving for more years than I can count.
Thanks to my dear friend Hippichick, I have a really delicious sounding new granola recipe to try out. I've been on a granola kick, but have been buying store bought. By making her recipe I will be doing myself such a HUGE favor nutritionally and I'm sure taste wise also. I'm actually really looking into making more and more items, sauces, seasonings, anything really, from scratch. I've eaten out, and bought prepared items long enough to realize that homemade is ALWAYS better. I just have to do a little readjusting in my head about how taking the time to make it from scratch is not wasting time, or hard, but rather adding so much to my life. I've had the working girl's mindset for 13 years now.........just throwing this, that and the other together because I'm too tired to make quality. Well the reality is, with a little forethought, and batch cooking, there is no reason to ever eat sub par quality due to time/energy restraints. I have 2.5 days off per week. That is plenty of time to plan meals and batch cook. I just have to realize the importance of doing these things, and put my nutritional needs above my lazy/entertainment/any other distraction needs.
Well, as usual, my blogs are more of a clearing of my mind process than anything else. I wish I wrote those motivating blogs that give hope and inspiration to others. I guess once I've had lasting success I will be more into that. For now it's still such a learning process. I use my blog time as a way to monitor the journey.
Cheers to us, may we all make healthy lifestyle choices for the rest of the day.
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