Wednesday, December 09, 2009
I just read a blog that I LOVED about focusing on being healthy, and losing weight being ONE of the by-products of a healthy life, not the goal. The blog also talked about all of the things that the scale doesn't measure that are so, so much better in my life now. It was great.
I have been doing a fairly good job of being within all my goals, tracking, calories, working out, etc.
And I do not want to focus solely on weight, but on being healthy in a way that is sustainable for me for the long haul.
it's time to see a little bit of progress. Even an itsy, bitsy, teeny, weeny bit.
I have joined the leaving 190s group, and I wonder what to add or do to make it happen.
it's the holidays and I need serious motivation.
my own little mini-me challenge.
It runs December 10 through January 10.
I've been managing 4 days a week working out.
Let's make it 5. I can do it.
Once a week time on SP, blogging or reading other peoples blogs and pages.
Food wise I've been OK, but I need to stay serious about measuring and being careful. It's amazing what little things can find their way into my mouth when I'm not.
NO, I said NO desserts (honestly I'm not that big of a fan of desserts anyway, so it's wasted calories for me).
I think those changes alone will have me seeing progress.
I'll let you know.
5 workouts / week
One time (not just tracking) on SP per week
Then we'll eval after the month.
Wednesday, September 02, 2009
When I started all of this I would sit and read posts of people who had been successful. 30 pounds and counting, 40 pounds and counting, 100 pounds and counting.
I would just shake my head, hopeful but doubtful.
The doubts have crept away slowly as the confidence built, and I had my own milestones. 10% of my body weight lost felt good. 25% done felt great. 50% was magical.
But nothing I've ever experienced feels like this--crossing from 200 to the 100s has blown my mind. I could say the things that are true--I haven't weighed this since jr. high, that I feel better than ever, that I'm still a long way from the 'end'.
but what I really want to say is this.
i really, really didn't think i could come this far. i'm shocked at my own strength, and even more shocked that I believe in my own strength.
and for the first time ever, i feel almost normal.
for the first time ever, i can stand in the check out line or anywhere in public and not wonder about how freakish i look to everyone around me. for the first time ever i feel almost like i'm not on the outside of things; like i don't have to hide as much, or work so hard.
the only way i can say it is that i almost feel normal.
and it's good.
normal is good.
i still have a ways to go, but this feels so monumental to me.
i just think of myself at every single age i've ever been, wishing so hard that this would come true, but unable to make it happen.
i weep for all of those women, all of those me's who wanted this so badly.
and i thank god that another birthday won't come when i think to myself, well maybe this year.
when i turn 40 i will be at my goal weight.
i want to shout to myself at 20 and 30 that there is hope.
and i would not have done this, could not have, without SP. SP has been the difference.
tracking has been vital, but so has reading the stories of so many of the people on this site. to be surrounded by success. to be surrounded by positivity.
It changes you, you know?
I can't believe it.
I won't go back.
This is too good. Too sweet.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Saturday, August 22, 2009
After 17 months on SP with things going fairly well overall, I may have hit a plateau. I'm not really sure, but I am realizing that since June not much has happened.
Now there are good reasons for this that I won't bore you with, so I am tempted to say it's not a plateau. But does the label really matter? I think not.
I read a lot about others' experiences with plateaus here on SP, and here is what I learned and have been incorporating with some success (some success? I am 0.6 pounds away from 199 pounds! even to be this close is amazing to me. I think jr. high was the last time I was in the 100s).
1. dropping the calories doesn't seem like a good idea. That was my first instinct, and in fact what I did. But then I panicked. What if I hit another plateau, then another? Will I eventually be eating 500 calories a day? I didn't know what to think, which is why SP is so helpful. Lots of other people have already thought through this, and helped me to come up with some sanity, which is that dropping calories unhealthily will not help.
2. Be hard core for 2 weeks. Not crazy, but for 2 weeks eat smack in the middle of my range around 1600 calories a day, and measure everything and NO extras that seem to creep in so easily (little lick of the peanut butter spoon after I measured, few extra nuts, extra si8ps of wine, etc). So for these 2 weeks (one down), be hard core and precise.
3. Vary the workout. This one is hard for me, because I work out with my partner. We've been exclusively doing Turbo Jam for several months, and everything I read suggests that variety is not only the spice of life, but necessary to keep your body rising to the challenge. We also walk and jog some, but it seems like we need to do more of that each week.
4. Weight Training. Enough said. This has always been a weak (no pun intended) area for me.
5. Belief, belief, belief. I watched a Star Trek episode last night where the body of one of the characters was taken over by a malevolent being (I know I'm a nerd, you don't need to tell me). From deep within her own taken-over brain, she fought for control and just kept fighting within herself.
Instead of approaching this may-or-may-not-be a plateau in a whining "whaat's wroooooong" kind of way, I will reach deep in myself and see it as a battle. One I will win. One in which strength of character and belief are necessary.
6. Remember that 150 is my goal, but my life is now, and not to get too focused on the outcome, but that I am healthier now that I EVER have been. And that is what we're going for here. Remember
So that is the wisdom I've gained from all of the SP members who have traveled there before me. There are more words of wisdom, but these are the ones that seem particular to my journey.
In belief, strength, and precision,
did I mention that I'm freaking 0.6 pounds from 199??????
Sunday, July 19, 2009
How many times do I have to relearn that my negative voice is not accurate?
I was feeling really down today because I'd been off track, eating over my calorie range from tuesday until today. It made me want to rethink everything, b/c it feels like i'm starting to get one good week, then one bad week.
But Jenny and I went over the past week. I didn't track since tues, which led to 2 things:
1. I ate not a huge amount but in an uncontrolled way on friday, in a big way b/c not tracking causes my brain and heart to not be 'in the game', and it's easier to go off on my own.
2. I actually only went over my calorie range twice when we replayed every day, yet I had this strong sense of being out of control for 5 days. Not tracking makes me go immediately to failure thinking. How many times do I have to relearn this?
So back to tracking, and back to positive-ness.
I'm such an outgoing, positive person most of the time. That voice is powerful, though.
Hope everyone is having a good Sunday!
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