Thursday, November 07, 2013
i dont have too much to blog about tonight.
i am pretty tired again tonight, dont know if its the change in the season, the fact it gets dark so early now and that we havent been seeing much sun these days regardless.
i am concerned again for my vitamin d and have started adding an extra 3000iu a day.
putting me up to 5000iu daily.
plus my one a day, fiber, and getting as much calcium and vitamin d and iron in my diet from food as i can.
but maybe it isnt enough. its time for me to start getting back in the tanning bed, whether it gives me extra vitamin d, i am unsure of, but it gives me some light and makes me feel alot better.
i go back to the doc on the 14th and dread more than i can say getting on the scale.
i am going to get my vitamin d level checked when i go back, i havent had it checked since may.
but there is nothing i can do but continue eating right and today has been a good day.
no junk, no snacking, and have stayed within calorie range and drank my water.
wondering who all is getting ready for the holidays???
i have done a little online shopping, but not a whole lot.
we still have thanksgiving to get thru and just trying to stay on track with my food is going to be enough to focus on, i still remember last thanksgiving like it was yesterday, it was a warm day and i went to the walking track, i sure hope to repeat that this year as well.
i just want to get back to walking more regularly and be outdoors as much as the weather will allow.
so, thats about it, the standard run of the mill blog.
my pic of the sun over the ocean myrtle beach-------
Wednesday, November 06, 2013
orange is my absolute favorite!!!!
Days that have equal amounts of good and bad???
Friends, family and neighbors losing their jobs in record numbers in Appalachia in the coalfields.
Saddens me, that a good friend got his lay off slip on his birthday.
Saddens me that I had to unfriend a facebook friend and real life neighbor for asking me if I knew where she could "find anything". Meaning drugs.
Saddens me even more that my own family members ask me that sometimes as well.
Knowing that my son is in NA and has been clean for over 2 years and is very much involved with helping others thru NA.
And yet, these people ask me this, as if I have some connection thru the drug cartel!!!
Maybe losing over 50 pounds gave people the impression it was from drug use.
Anyway, you say no, you unfriend, you tell people that you are po'd about their assumptions and you move on.
Good things, today, the weather was wonderful and I stayed within calorie range and feel pretty good tonight.
Not tired or sleepy and have gotten some more house work done.
You would wonder how two people can accumulate so much work to be done.
And one more good thing, stopping off at a local thrift type outlet store today and discovering they keep my Trident vitality gum that all the other stores seem to have stopped selling.
In fact, I had ordered it thru drugstore.com and figured when I ran out I would once again have to order it thru them.
It was in two big shopping cards full of all different kinds of gums, so I only got 3 packs, tomorrow I am going back and go thru those buggies until I find every pack I can find, at 3 for a dollar!!!!
I chew the gum when I walk, it has almost become a ritual, walking clothes, earbuds, hair in band, walking shoes on, and trident gum.
Now, I have my gum and no excuses!!!
Tuesday, November 05, 2013
So today was spent trying to clear up an insurance issue on the home.
Seems the bank and the insurance company cant get on the same track, maybe now they have.
And more house work, and thats about my day so far.
Trying to get organized, in more ways than one.
I dont even want to talk about the scale this week. Today being weigh in day.
I just sweep it under the rug and decide ok, its one of two things, go from here.
or go back and dwell on the bad feelings and the disappointment.
I vote to go from here. Besides, I am just about too tired to focus on it tonight, I am worn out, time change maybe???
It wasnt terribly bad, but it was not the number I wanted to see.
Oh well, its just the same old tired what do I do, where do I start over, what am I doing wrong, blah blah blah that I have said a million times.
I just step back and not dwell on it, cant go back in time so I have to live up to the poor choices I have made and then I move on.
Monday, November 04, 2013
Tired, but yet so much still to do tonight, housework, fold clothes, do dishes, sweep kitchen and clean the bathroom!!
Then when my son gets back with my car, I have to drive him back to his house!!
Well, by that I am referring to a post I made today in my team forum, Cutting down the booze.
Yesterday I was invited to go out with my friend, I knew she wanted to go drinking. I told her no I had other things to do.
So, today, she asked me what I "got into". I told her I went and picked up my son, and bought my neice some baby clothes and then came home and cleaned my house and stayed home and watched the Walking Dead.
She said, that "sounds domestic, lol"
Well, was that supposed to be a bad thing?
Trying to help out my niece by buying her some baby clothes, helping out my son by giving him a ride while his car is torn up?
Cleaning, staying home, not drinking????
I feel really sorry for her more and more as I listen, with sober ears and see her with sober eyes.
She probably sees me as her last link to that past life, or at least one of them and that life was 18 years ago.
The fun people, the fun places, and the fun times, are way behind me.
Most of the friends we had back there are old, or dead or at home, being domestic.
I can remember being in my 20s and saying, I sure hope I am not in this bar drinking when I am in my 40s.
Once in a while to go sit and have ONE beer, to ride around the town, to chat with a few old timers who wander in.
But for me, its so much a part of my past.
I dont even mind being domestic these days.
I am shopping, for me, bought myself some new clothes, some items for the new place, upcoming move.
And some Christmas items to put back.
Trying to clean a little tonight and watch the Voice.
Hoping the weather is warmer the next few days so I can get a few good long walks in.
I might be a little domesticated, but I am still not tame!!!
Tuesday, October 22, 2013
Going thru and cleaning out some old emails, I found a pic I had taken on Jan 7th of this year.
One day before I broke my foot. A pic of my feet, standing on the scale. My toes were quite gold sparkly, lol. As the day before that I had a pedicure.
So, as of today, a full 9 months later and I am up 9 pounds. I guess when you look at it in those terms, one pound per month, it isnt all that bad.
Even though, it should be many many pounds lower. I should have, and had hoped to, been down something like 30 or 40 pounds by now.
But its a new day.
Finding that pic gave me hope.
I realize that I havent gained an outrageous amount of weight and there is time to catch back up.
I might be close to a year later, and I have blogged before about how 2013 has been one of the worst years of my life.
There is time to catch back up. I think I should be able to lose that 9lbs and 1 more and get myself right back where I left off.
My goal is to lose this 10 lbs by the end of this year and go into 2014 with a whole new weight and a whole new hopeful outlook on life.
Yes, I know I should be able to lose this much sooner. If I could only get back to the way I was losing weight before 1 to 2 lbs a week, I would be able to lose that 10 and maybe another 10 before the goal date.
But realistically, I havent been losing any weight at all, so to set the goal any higher would surely be asking for failure.
I dont know what was going on in my life during this weight loss period that I am doing all that much differently.
Maybe it was just a much less stressful period in my life, maybe I had a higher metabolism, maybe I was just more focused.
I will admit my focus has waned in these months. But its always been right under the surface, and I am not eating that many more calories per day.
Less alcohol is in my diet now, almost none at all.
I sure am not walking as much, and as the days grow wetter and colder I know I will walk even less.
But I am not going to stop trying.
I just really hope that 2014 comes in like a lion, wild and bold and ready to conquer this!!!
I am ready to get back on that scale and take pics of much lower numbers.
This is really difficult to see the long term when I say the numbers out loud, but as of right now, my goal is still a good 80 lbs off.
I become angry when I sit and think that as of right now I am still eligible for lap band surgery.
I have such a long hard journey ahead of me, and I am not giving up.
I will settle for this to take me another 2, even 3 years if necessary.
But as of today I am just going to focus on the next 2 months and the next 10 pounds.
It is cold and dreary here and we are looking at some possible wet snow flakes in the higher elevations here.
I have seen it this cold and even snowing on Halloween, for example last year on Halloween, we buried Honeys mom.
And it had snowed so much the 2 or 3 days after she passed, that the grave diggers had to tram the backhoe up the hill to the cemetery to dig her grave, as their truck wouldnt go up the hill in the snow.
I will never forget November 1st if I live to be 109!!!
I went walking the day she was buried, Halloween day and it was so snowy and cold I had to wear a hoodie and gloves and a scarf and boggan and the next day, November 1st.
I went out walking in my regular tshirt and walking pants, the weather warmed up that much overnight.
Today I made a big pot of homemade veggie laden chili, I added carrots, celery, mushrooms, onion, green and red bell peppers. Along with my regular chili mixings. Good hearty and hot on this cold fall night.
Time to get my housework done for the evening and get ready to watch the Biggest Loser!!!
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