Tuesday, August 21, 2012
So, today at lunch, my friend asked me if I wanted to walk this evening!!
I am sitting there, in pain, with lidoderm patches on my ankle, having popped 800 mg motrin before lunch, and she wants to walk????
I am seriously thinking about it,haha, no, I really really want to. But I do know its too soon, and I know I would only be limping along.
I couldnt keep a pace to make any real significance in a calorie burn...so, I guess I will stay in and ride my bike.
I had a good lunch, salad only, even if I did put a little too much ranch dressing on it.
I am self diagnosing, as is so easy to do with access to the internet....so I type into google, "burning pain in ankle"...and up pops, Tarsal tunnel syndrome....although another friend who is a runner suggested it might be plantar fascilitis...I dont think so.
As that is the problem my friend was having with her foot and her pain was like a pulling stretching pain in the main bottom of her foot.
Mine is more on the ankle, top of foot and is a burning sensation when sitting and just a tight pain right on top of the foot bone when walking.
I am going to the doctor in the morning and hoping she might have an idea as she herself is also a walker.
I have done pretty good this week, considering my main source of exercise has been taken right out from under me.
Have been on the bike some, but its just so boring and so mundane and I get fed up to soon and quit.
Lifting weights, but not really getting a good workout from that either.
I just dont push myself enough I guess.
I know when I do get on the scale tomorrow, its going to show I have lost at least 20 to 22 lbs since my last visit.
But was really hoping to have lost another 3 lbs before this date and just couldnt do it.
But maybe when I go back for my next 3 month visit, I will be able to see another 20 gone.
Keeping fingers crossed.
Monday, August 20, 2012
Got back on the walking track this morning...for all of about 25 very slow, very careful minutes. And the pain in the ankle seemed to spread up my leg into my thigh, could just be where I was taking it slow and easy and where I havent walked in 4 days.
But after 25 minutes, I just decided my foot was more important that a few calories.
So, I go back to the doc on Wed, will discuss the matter with her and hoping maybe she can help me figure out if its just too much wear and tear too soon, or if its a sprain, or a pulled muscle or maybe some kind of tendon problem or what.
Very disappointed, I just love walking so much now and miss it.
But I am doing my weights and getting back on my recumbant bike. Going to try to burn off some calories and keep moving.
Hoping the scale had moved a little more before going back to the doctors, but so far...its stuck, hasnt really moved any in a week.
But, at least I know I have lost around 20 lbs when I go back to her.
I guess its just disappointing to really begin to enjoy walking and really look forward to it, when always before I dreaded it. And then to have to give it up.
I know soon I will be back on the tract walking, but still I guess I had just come to see it as the biggest part of my fitness plan.
Sleepy, despite two cups of coffee this morning. Been up since 4am and really thinking about an afternoon nap.
Sunday, August 19, 2012
I sometimes moan and groan, but I am reminded quite often of just how lucky I am.
I do not have diabetes...at my weight, almost everyone assumes I do. Even my own mother and father, called me recently to ask if I had any extra test strips....?
My own parents do not even know that I am a non-diabetic? This is odd.
But it just goes to the mentality of my area, so many people are sedentary, my parents included. My eight year old nephew is pushing obese for a child of his age, and my own son, who, I am so happy for that he has made such positive changes in his life, including getting a good management job and being clean and becoming a local leader in the NA program here.
But, he is pushing way too heavy....I cannot say much other than to encourage him to eat healthier, stop smoking and exercise.
But, I guess we all have to make that choice for ourselves.
I know I sure did.
I was reminded of a story I seen many years ago on one of the talk shows, maybe Geraldo or Rickie....of a very very obese woman who couldnt even get up out of her chair.
And Richard Simmons was showing her how to exercise, using cans or 2lb dumbbells in her chair....he told her to just move.
Just keep moving and she would become looser and begin to burn some calories, while not alot, but she would at least be trying.
And she did, and she eventually was able to get up and do a few minutes of standing exercise and so on, to the point she eventually became mobile again.
I have taken pride in the fact, that other than a few months dealing with a torn meniscus and having had surgery....I have never been that sedentary.
I can and do move, alot.
I dance and I am pretty good at it, even the flatfootin'...although, not as good as I once was.
My body has gotten older and pain has set into areas, such as back and ankles.
But I am lucky, not to be sick and to be healthy for the most part, considering my weight and that its taking me a long time to get here.
I plan to walk tomorrow, as I havent walked any since Thursday....have been nursing the ankle, with epsom salts, salonpas patches, heat, ice, you name it and staying off it...other than light housework and driving to the dollar store.
I do feel lucky tonight.
I have lost around 20 lbs give or take, the fluctuating scale....
But will know for sure on Wednesday when I go back to the doctor for the first trip since May.
And that in itself says alot, that I can go 3 months without needing to see the doctor.
My bp has been staying at a record low and that is also great, since I do suffer from lifelong high blood pressure...mostly uncontrollable, according to most of my docs.
But they must not know about me!!!!
Since I have given up soda, July 4th, my Independence Day!!!
and have been walking, two, three, four, seven days a week....and eating healthy, I have had great numbers.
I do feel lucky, and it isnt just luck, it has been hard work too.
Getting up at 5 or 6 am, to get to the tract to beat the heat.
Going for 20 minutes to start, now up to nearly 2 hours....but I know I have to cut back to around an hour til my foot is totally healed.
And having SP and my spark friends to encourage me or kick my butt when needed.
I hope everyone else sees the big picture as I am beginning to.
But I do have a long way to go, and alot to consider, surgery or not.
And, that part of the picture will also be revealed when the time is right.
Saturday, August 18, 2012
Today has been a pretty typical Saturday, sans walking!!
I went to the walking track last night after the rains had gone, around 7pm, and only walked about half way around the track, when my foot just rebelled and seriously.
So, I hobbled back to the car and drove home in frustration and worry.
Today the foot is still tender, the pain in right on the top of the foot, but isnt as bad when stepping.
Of course I have tried to stay off of it, only doing some light housecleaning, and what little walking I have done thru the house and around the dollar store.
Went to pay last respects to a dear family friend who passed way too young.
The man was only 61, but had suffered health issues, mostly related to smoking and heart problems, and of course stress and heartbreak.
As, only a year ago his daughter in law died of a drug overdose, and one month later her husband, the mans son, died of complications due to drug use, and probably a broken heart lead him to overdose.
It is such a shame the drug use I see in my community. and this week indictments came down on a local, well respected doctor and pharmacist, for abusing prescribing priviledges and selling drug samples meant to be given to those who couldnt pay.
The pharmacist, was found dead in a hotel room in another state, I guess facing losing his livliehood and reputation, paying huge fines, repaying medicaid, being asked to testify against his own co-workers, and jail time was just too much for him.
So, thats one of the reasons why, when you are really in pain, and you have real issues and go to your doctor seeking treatment, and sometimes that might include pain medicine, you feel like a criminal.
Or, at least I do.
So, staying off the foot is driving me bats. I really dont want to fall into bad habits, like getting lazy on the couch and forgetting where I put my shoes and pedometer.
I am so hoping that these few days icing it and staying off it, will make the difference.
Went to Subway for lunch and brought home a tuna sub, and a turkey breast for later.
Not much else to report on this Saturday, feeling pretty good other than the whole not getting to walk thing.
But, I know I will be back out there.
Wanted to say thanks to all those who offered words of advice on my blog about the WLS, and my upcoming visit to the doctor.
The whole thing was, I had been looking into the RNY bypass, then decided to go back to my original decision to do the band.
The doc and her staff apparently think I need to be counseled in the huge difference in the two.
But, I dont, I have read everything there is to read, talked to numerous people and have decided it is the band or nothing for me.
And I am really beginning to lean toward nothing.....here is one reason why.
As they are prone to do, insurance companies turned down a friend of mine recently to have her skin removal, tummy tuck, etc, after having lost 113 pounds in a year from having lapband surgery.
This is a young mother, much younger than myself, and I know her results after lap band are not typical, but it was nice to know that band could bring about that much of a loss.
But then, the insurance companies have to go and do her that way, her with three young kids and knowing shes young and has her whole life ahead of her.
So, I wonder do I really feel like fighting them for mine when the time might and probably would come????
I am just really re-examining my whole outlook on this.
Seeing the face of a friend who had bypass 2 years ago and who now looks like death, purely sick and gaunt and ill.
I wouldnt want that look no matter how much weight I could lose.
Or the facebook post of another who had the bypass 3 years ago and post pics of large sized snickers bars, mountain dews and ooodles of pics of beer????
What was the point?
I am finally learning to live healthy, to try to overcome cravings, and not see them as the end of my existence, and to walk, to love to walk, to lift weights, etc.
and enjoy the whole decision to get healthy.
And I am sorry, I dont mean to upset or offend anyone who has had the bypass or sleeve....but I just personally dont see losing your hair, and having to forcefeed yourself vitamins and getting kidney stones and stomach disorders and looking and feeling sick as healthy.
I told my best friend recently, when we ran into a lady we both know, who has had the bypass and looks like a walking sick, black under the eyes, skin hanging off her face, skelton....I would rather stay somewhat plump, maybe lose 50 or 80 lbs and still be a little chubby and filled out....than to lose 150 lbs and look like death.
Friday, August 17, 2012
I know I blogged once already today. But, I got a phone call, (see other blog if interested in the back story)....today, from the doctors office, wanting to see me to discuss the matter.
Well, I am more concerned at this point that for the second day this week I havent gotten to walk at all.
I had got up early to go walking today, really early, but my foot and other issues kept me from the track.
And now, it rains.
Well, tomorrow is another day!!!
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