Tuesday, October 09, 2012
Imagine starting your race off in a white shirt and whooshing through the finish line looking like a rainbow puked on you.
That's the color run! At each 'k' along the way, you run through a wall of colored powder, each one a different color.
This has got to be the most fun 5k ever! And through some good luck, I managed to get a spot on a team at the last minute, so I'll be getting my Sparkpeople Virtual 5k on in STYLE ;-) See ya at the finish line, people!
Wednesday, October 03, 2012
Yesterday, I decided that I needed to get serious about my weight loss. As I inch closer to 30, having an extra 20 pounds on my 5í2Ē frame is starting to take its toll on me physically and emotionally. I can only imagine what the future holds for me if I continue with the status quo of a sedentary lifestyle and a junk food diet. Besides that, Iím tired of not feeling fabulous!
Five years ago, I embarked on a weight loss plan that changed my life, for better and for worse. Though I got down to my lowest ever weight of 145 and gained muscle tone and confidence from the compliments of friends and strangers, the all-or-nothing attitude that I had adopted to get there left me emotionally in shambles, dealing with the aftermath of an eating disorder. Maintaining the weight loss became my obsession and my greatest fear.
After therapy and a few years of self improvement, I was able to recover from my distorted thinking (yay!) but what I was left with was the opposite side of the spectrum.
In order to affirm that I was no longer under the control of a harmful dieting mindset, I had to eat whatever I craved in whatever quantities I chose. While Iím sure that this was a helpful part of my recovery process, it was not a healthy or sustainable way of life. Iíve gained back all of the weight Iíd lost and while Iíve been working on cultivating a healthier body image, I also know that I would be healthier and happier at a lower weight.
So here I am, stuck between a rock and a hard place: Can I pursue a healthy, BALANCED lifestyle without succumbing to obsessive disordered thinking? The fear that I would not be able to find moderation in either direction has kept me from attempting to lose weight for a long time now. But Iíve finally reached a place where Iím no longer comfortable; my food choices leave me tired and unfulfilled, my body aches from underuse and Iím noticing flab in places Iíve never had it before. Knowing what the future holds for me if I DONíT change now is more frightening than the uncertainty of attempting yet another weight loss regimen. Thatís why Iíve made the commitment to give it a real shot.
You canít let your fear of failure keep you from reaching for the things you really want in life. The only TRUE way to fail is to not try in the first place. And while Iím still anxious about whether or not Iíll be able to make the long term changes I seek, I am proud of myself for taking the first brave step to the plate. After all, you canít hit a home run unless you swing the bat.
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