Sunday, January 20, 2008
Wins the race they say, and I have to make it my personal mantra.
I want to loose 60 lbs by August, and at this rate, I'll need well over a year.
I've worked my butt off all week, had two bad eating days and only lost 1 measly pound.
Yes, yes, I'm building muscle. But why am I so hung up on the scale? I had the husband hide it and he only brings it out on Sundays. So, I was *hoping* to see at least a 2lb loss, instead I see a 1 lbs loss (and that was AFTER getting on and off about 8 times to get the lowest reading, if I took the first reading, I am the same as last week).
I take measurements, and try to concentrate on that. I also like the way my undies, bras and other clothing is getting looser, yet I still go *but but but...the scale said.....*
I just want to know if, one week, when all this muscle is built, and I can run on the treadmill for a solid 30 minutes will the weight start coming off faster??? Or will I be stuck with a half a lb here and a pound there. If so, I'll scream.
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Every year I make resolutions, and every year i break them.
This year I started my program when I did for a reason. I didn't want a "start" date. I didn't want to wait until AFTER the holidays when I would have probably gained another 5 lbs from holiday binging. Instead I started this at the start of the holidays. I figure if I could survive Christmas gorge-a-thon intact, well then I could do just about anything.
I am not going to be making my goal unfortunately of 220 by Jan 1, that is only three days away, and I still sit at 222. Oh well. I'm also bloated and stuff from that nasty PMS crap, so hopefully thats all water weight.
we are having friends over on New Years, its also usually a gorge-a-thon. This time though I'm putting out lots of fruit and veggies. Very little meat and cheese. I also said I would be doing a chocolate fondue, so....um... I might be in trouble. Ah well, its one night. I just won't eat any meals, and just graze all day.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
I survived the Christmas season, PMSing and all. Actually, more appropriately, the family survived my PMSing during the holiday gorge fest.
I came out 2.5 lbs lighter, and proud of myself for not pigging out on everything in sight. I got chocolate in my stocking, and it's still there!
The cinnamon supplements are really helping to control my snacking urges. I can't believe it. It's been my biggest hurdle in this whole journey, the snacking. On one hand it seems to be emotional, but on the other hand I think it has a lot to do with being insulin resistant (the PCOS curse).
I am loving this. I truly am. 8 lbs are gone. I feel in more control of my life. I feel stronger, leaner, happier, healthier. In fact, last night I was watching a show and they were showing bad foods (it was a health show on weight loss) and I was actually grossed OUT by the greasy offerings that they were showing. Yuck. All the unhealthy food looked, well, unhealthy. Not too long ago, if I had seen the same images, I would have started to "taste" it and then get a craving for that or something similar. No matter the time. It would have been a real struggle to abstain.
I hope this feeling lasts.
Friday, December 21, 2007
I've done pretty well at only baking a few treats, and only ONE batch of each. I've gone over my calories for today though, we had popcorn tonight with a movie (weekly tradition) and I am sitting here nursing a rum and eggnog. The egg nog is at least cut 1/2 and 1/2 with skim milk. Doesn't taste AS good, but I certainly didn't need a 700 calorie drink.
I don't want to feel that I am depriving myself, because otherwise I might binge.
In the past, around this time of year I have baked a ton, and bought a ton more different meats, cheeses and crackers and we've gone to town on them. This year, I've made three baked items (shortbread, sugar cookies and butterscotch confetti) and I still have bought some cheeses and meats, but I've only bought high end Hickory farms stuff. I've also incorporated these things INTO my lunch as an indulgence.
Tomorrow we leave for family, they're big eaters so it will be a challenge to eat responsibly. I mean, ALL they do is eat. Good thing they have a treadmill. I'm taking my workout gear and will be working out daily. I will allow myself to nibble, but not binge as I do every year.
Monday, December 10, 2007
My friend is leaving the country for two years. I am so incredibly sad.
I over ate today, by about 800 calories. They add up fast dammit.
I feel dirty almost.
I know that I ate because I am upset. But then, I wonder if perhaps I am also eating too few calories, today I was hungry...like really really hungry. Lately I've been able to keep the hunger at bay, but not today. I don't know if its because I saw my friend for the last time today - after she and her kids left it was like I had to eat everything in sight.
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