SNOOKUMS19   29,673
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Getting back on track with life!

Monday, May 09, 2011

Yesturday was nice. Although I woke up with a stomache ache. Yuck. Joe and the boys brought me strawberries with Greek yogurt and cashews in bed. :) So nice! I read the paper and got ready for brunch with the moms. Uggggg. Thank God mimosa's make it proper to drink in the morning. All four parents did everything I expecting in the ways that drive me flipping mad. Oh well. Left them and headed to Manchester for some shopping Yeah! Went to our awesome fudge store The Village Peddler in Arlington. So Yum! Headed to the outlets and got an awesome new spring purse at Kate Spade. So stylin! Got some cute things real cheap at Gap outlet. Had our Yum Yum fav Vermont sandwich at Zoey's for dinner and headed home. Ok so food choices of the board bad. Day with Joe and the boys priceless :). So funny.... crossed the Vermont state line and I announced Adam you can get married now! :) He is so awesome he wanted to go to a rally in Albany today for gay marriage. I thought he was a bit young to be downtown missing school today. I do support him wanting to be an activist though. He is awesome! Today is all about getting house kinda back in order from the flood. Feeling positive about that. Will make amazing food choices today! Will go to hip hop class tonight and dance off all that yummy food from yesturday! Have a healthy day my friends!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TABBYARTS 5/11/2011 11:21AM

    Great about spending family time and ME time.
You are doing great!
And I like how supportive you are of Adam!
TOBY

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MRDPOLING 5/9/2011 12:31PM

    Here is getting back to normal and making good food choices for us both!

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KAILYNSTAR 5/9/2011 11:37AM

    Nothing better than 'family'.

Sounds like you had a great day as it went by.



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HIPPIECHIC68 5/9/2011 9:34AM

    I'm so glad you enjoyed your day...and you have to splurge sometimes...glad you aren't feeling bad about it.

Way to go getting through the extended family thing in order to spend the rest of the day with your close loved ones...I'm sure you did great!

Have a great week as you get things back in order from the flood! emoticon

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People have left the building!

Saturday, May 07, 2011

Thank God the restoration people are gone. Its quite disconcerting to have strangers in my house every day. Now we have to hire people to come in and put in new flooring but that should be fun. My son Josh and I don't like change much so picking out new stuff is always a challenge. I'm sure it will be good though. Heading to my hip hop class in a few minutes. Happy for that. Food was good yesturday. Plain fat free Greek yogurt with sliced banana for breakfast. Yummy cobb salad for lunch. Activia plain yogurt with sliced apples for snack. Dinner not so great. Chicken wings for dinner with frozen yogurt for dessert. Oh well. It was Friday night. My parents and brothers family are at odds at the moment. Should be an interesting brunch tomorrow :). Oh well. At least its not my stuff this time. The boys will make me a light breakfast in bed tomorrow, then brunch with the moms and then the 4 of us will head to Manchester for the day. I am really looking forward to that. It will be nice to have them to myself and to not have to deal with anyone elses drama :). We are going to our old church today so that we can go with my parents. Haven't been there in a while. Have a great day my friends!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TABBYARTS 5/8/2011 1:14AM

    The breakfast in bed thing is appealing ...
TOBY BEAR

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MRDPOLING 5/7/2011 8:03PM

    Ooooooooo! Shopping spreeeeee!!! Take me with youuuuuu!!!!

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HARTKITTY 5/7/2011 12:50PM

    Great plans hope you have day emoticon emoticon emoticon

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Yeah for Friday!!!!!

Friday, May 06, 2011

So restoration people are coming this morning but will be gone by 10am. Joe should be home from work by then and we get to spend some time together. We had a great talk yesturday morning about everything I talked with the therapist about. She also said that not only do I have to mourn the death of my plans for Adams future but the death of my relationship with my mom. Uggggg. Mom and I are in such a strange place now. I'm glad she is going to see my therapist in a couple of weeks. Maybe that will be good for us. I pray it will be good for her. Anyway, Joe and I had a great talk. We are in a good place and that is so important to me. He is my best friend and the best man I know. I am blessed. So onward and upward! I had a great Zumba class yesturday. I felt so much better once I got some good dancing in. Food choiceds were awesome until dinner :( We ordered Chinese food and omg definitely partaked in all of it. Will be better today. I feel better about making the healthy choices. I will only get 4 workouts in this week so kinda bummed about that. Next week will be better. I'm looking forward to Mother's Day. We will be going to brunch with the mom's and then have the day to ourselves. We are going to Manchester,Vt. and gonna do some fun outlet shopping. We have a favorite Granny Smith Melt sandwich that we can't wait to get our hands on and an awesome fudge store in Arlington that we hit on the way home. :) Hope all my Spark friends who are moms have a wonderful day! Moms of two legged and or 4 legged children :). We all should celebrate ourselves! Have a piece of fudge and think of me :).

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MRDPOLING 5/6/2011 4:01PM

    Yes I am finally getting a weekend! So needed too.

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HIPPIECHIC68 5/6/2011 8:54AM

    Sounds like you are doing well...I'm glad you will get to spend some time with your hunny. Enjoy your Mother's Day, too!

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Thanks Spark friends. Feeling better.

Thursday, May 05, 2011

Sorry about the whining yesturday. I think those fans were blowing my sense away :) So mom brought my gown to a bridal shop who is sending it out for restoration. I feel much better about that. I think going to the therapist brought all of my feelings front and center and I just let it all go on my blog. I did cry alot at the meeting. I haven't done that in a long time. I think I have been in protect and support mode with Adam and our family I haven't been able to move along the process myself. I hate the process. I'm not very good at it. I just want to be ok and I guess that won't be ok untill I just let it happen. She keeps saying that it is a death. I understand, kinda. I guess there is stages of death. So I will work through this and pray alot and blog... alot. Most days are great . Adam is great. Joe is working through stuff now. I am here for him. I guess I just wanted her to give me tools to make it easier or quicker to process. I guess there isn't any. We had such a nice night. We went to DiBella's for subs. Yum. Came home and watched Modern Family in our tiny full size bed. Door shut so can't hear fans! So two teenagers, Joe, me and our dog all hanging out laughing our faces off. That was good. I am so blessed. So skipped the gym for subs and mind numbing TV. Gotta do it sometimes. Going to Zumba this morning with good friend. Have a healthy day friends!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VBPARROTHEAD 5/5/2011 10:19PM

  Well, so what that you whined a bit? We all need a place to go to whine sometimes and here is a good place! As for crying, it is healing behavior, except when an onion causes the tears! And your therapist is right about the death part but did she mention the birth that comes as a result of that death. well, there should be a birth of a stronger and confident person! I sort of think of it as the "born again" thing that jesus talked about! Yea, all the evangelicals in our area (and there are many) think that I am headed straight for a visit with Lucifer for thinking like that but I think they will be surprised.

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MRDPOLING 5/5/2011 2:12PM

    There is nothing like a good cry to clean the soul!

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HARTKITTY 5/5/2011 12:12PM

    You go girl! Sometimes one must just let it all hang out. It does the soul good to just put everything down and its also OK to get cross with God sometimes. He can handle it

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KAILYNSTAR 5/5/2011 11:23AM

    I think that you are just like the rest of us...Crying lets out tension, hurt, love, pain, sadness, happiness, shame, resentment, grief...

To let it go through crying, is a relief in some ways. One feels a little better after.



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HIPPIECHIC68 5/5/2011 10:11AM

    We all whine sometimes... like you said...it has to get out, so we have to do it...lol and oh, so true...

Wishing you the best, my friend...
emoticon

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I hate a boohoo blog.... but here we go...

Wednesday, May 04, 2011

So the very loud fans were going all night and morning. They pulled up the carpeting in basement last nigh. Today decided they will have to rip up kitchen flooring. They are replacing all baseboards and waiting on drying to see how many walls have to be replaced. The worst part of all of this is that my wedding gown is wet. :( It was my mothers gown. My heart is broken. Not sure what God is doing to me right now. This year has all been about the prayer footprints for me. But come on all ready. I'm in shock. I can't even cry about my wedding gown yet. I don't know what to do with myself. So I sit here and I blog. I went to m therapist this morning. I cried to her about alot of things. I don't know what I was expecting her to do. Make everything better? She said that all my feelings are valid and this is a process still I'm going through with Adam. I'm just done with processing. I want everything to be good. Some days it is but some...I just don't know. I will go to my Zumba class tonight. That will be a good distraction. I'm just tired. I used to say taking things day by day, then minute by minute, then moment by moment. Where do we go from there ????????

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

QUADJ_216 5/5/2011 12:30PM

  It is always darkest right before the dawn. My heart goes out to you. Praying things get better. Remember you are not alone, everyone of us are here for you
emoticon

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QUADJ_216 5/5/2011 12:29PM

  It is always darkest right before the dawn. My heart goes out to you. Praying things get better. Remember you are not alone, everyone of us are here for you
emoticon

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HIPPIECHIC68 5/5/2011 10:14AM

    Life *is* a process...

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MRDPOLING 5/4/2011 10:05PM

    As much as you liked your "STUFF" ... in the end, it is just "STUFF"!

The Kitchen floor... STUFF!
The Carpet... STUFF!
The Wedding Dress (Yes it has sentamental value) but it is still just... STUFF!

STUFF is repairable and replaceable. The House will be repaired and there are places that can professionally clean the wedding dress so that no one will ever know it got wet in the flood.

Instead of looking at what you have lost, look at what you haven't lost.

In the not to distant future you are going to look back at this FLOOD as just something that happened. It will be a story to share from time to time, but in the long run, it isn't going to effect you or your family.

Rememeber, God didn't do this! Stuff happens, but if you are willing to let him, God can use this to bless all of you. Remember, all things work together for the good, for those that love Him!

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PRINCHESSA 5/4/2011 8:28PM

    emoticonWhat they said... and just stay strong, become stronger. Patience is the key. Definitely check into getting the dress restored and protected. Things always seem to pile on really thick, and then finally one by one, the layers of issues usually seem to make room for new ones ;) But in the end, you're a survivor and can make it through that much more!

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VBPARROTHEAD 5/4/2011 8:06PM

  Does the insurance company have anyone who can restore your wedding dress? Sometimes they do. it has certainly been a difficult time for you and the easy thing for me to say is "Let go and let God", or "These are material things", or "What about people in Alabama and Mississippi?" but that would be discounting the real pain that you are feeling and the sadness that the whole flood is causing you personally! The stress of this year has probably intensified your feelings too. I can say that I don't think God is doing these things but I think God is allowing themto happen. Sure wish I knew why, I would tell you, but sometimes, years later, we figure it out and sometimes we can only say, "It made me stronger". Maybe, someday you will use these experiences to help someone else but right now that isn;t important. What is important are the feelings of sadness, frustration, probably anger, and of being overwhelmed that are important. I am glad that you could cry at your therapist's office. I am glad that you are here and can vent and sure wish that we could all help if by just giving a much needed hug! emoticon

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KAILYNSTAR 5/4/2011 3:47PM

    Where do we go from there?

Living. Accepting the good and the bad. Going forward, not backward. Having hope and knowing that all in all...material things just don't count.

You will get through this. Renovating/fixing house is hard on anybody.

I am sorry about the gown. Maybe the drycleaners can fix it. I'm not sure. The sooner you take it there, the better.

Hope things get better for you in time. Time, this will all take time.

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REDSHOES2011 5/4/2011 2:40PM

    emoticonlife is unfair at times..

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