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I guess three days of peace is better than zero?

Monday, April 04, 2011

Adam woke up and yelled at me when I let him know he was about to miss the bus. Adam never yells at me. He got to school and texted Joe that he was sorry he yelled at me and he hardly slept at all last night. He then texted Joe that he told his friend Shirag that he is gay in first period. Now Shirag is a kid who can't sit still. Who is always making a joke and is basically trouble waiting to happen. Very intelligent though. Shirag said thats ok and that he will try be serious about it. Not sure what that means exactly. By lunch everyone should know now. Ugggggg. I'm actually pretty calm right now. I think I get like that when things get really big and I have no control over them. So here I am at home waiting to see how things pan out. I'm meeting Joe for lunch so that will be comforting. I'm choosing not to confide in my mom about this its just to much. So here I am blogging it out. I had some greek yogurt with sliced banana for breakfast and some decaf coffee. I'm drinking some green tea now.
The party went ok yesturday. I can't stand my sister inlaw. The one who is still with the abusive heroine addict. She makes me physically ill. Making small talk with her is almost as bad as a root canal. I trudged through and did it without even a glass of wine :). The kids had a great time. I had a great Zumba class yesturday but she added a song that does alot of arm work and omg my shoulders and back are killing me. I guess it wil get me ready for tank top season :). I hope my Spark friends had a nice weekend. I'll keep you updated.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

VBPARROTHEAD 4/5/2011 8:52PM

  You have a teenager in the house, there is not a lot of peace when you have a teenager! Teens can be and usually are a bit volatile! Boys are just a year or two behind girls. I raised 2 girls and there was alwaysomething, or so it seemed. You have to roll with thepunches, do what you think is best, and come here to share and get things off your chest!!

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KAILYNSTAR 4/4/2011 11:27AM

    Let it go. I know as a parent that one wants to protect their kid, but he chose to open up to this. Unfortunetly, that means consequences. Times have changed. People react differently in school than in our time. I do hope that things go well for him.

As for you, enjoy your lunch. Try to relax.

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HIPPIECHIC68 4/4/2011 11:16AM

    I know you will handle everything well since that is your track record, so to speak. Part of all this with Adam, for you, may be a little letting go. He is making the choice to tell people because as you've told him before to let it just be a part of him... I don't tell people I'm straight when I meet them or even in general. They will learn as they get to know me...

As a mother of grown children, there comes a time when what they choose(Adam telling everyone his 'secret') is not the same as what you would choose for them (being more discreet) but it is his life, his choice and he will have to deal with whatever comes from it... I know you want to protect him and it is very hard for moms to do, but there comes a time for every little one to fly...

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FREES1 4/4/2011 11:03AM

    sorry about your sister in law - maybe reaching out, trying to see from where she is coming, might help...

may you see your glass as half full, rather than half empty

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MRDPOLING 4/4/2011 11:00AM

    I think we all have one or more relatives that we cannot stand to be on the same planet with. Its sad that to be away from them means to be away from those I do care for, but that is how I cope.

As for Adam... I am praying for him and his continued growing.

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DEDIAZ 4/4/2011 10:50AM

    Well, the day may not be so stressful! Lets be optimistic! emoticon And hey at least you had a great zumba class! My instructor plays the same songs ALWAYS emoticon

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Hi Spark friends!

Sunday, April 03, 2011

Good morning Sparkies. I'm in a good place this morning and am thankful for that. Omg saw a funny movie last night. We went out for Japanese before the movie. I had Sashimi and a glass of wine. Joe, Adam and his friend Jared and his dad had regular chinese food. The movie was Paul and it was a good laugh. Had lunch with my brother, sister inlaw and parents. That went fine. I had an awesome Cobb salad minus the cheese and unsweetened iced tea. Sister inlaw was great but mom was really getting on my nerves. I love her but wow. I went to my hip hop class in the morning which was good but I was distracted. I have a Zumba class at noon todaay and I'm really looking forward to it. I'm definitely feeling a difference in my clothes. Yeah! I'm feeling stronger and clearer. Day by day but two full good days. Thats a streak for me :). So working on a good third day. We are going to my inlaws today for a combined birthday party for 3 of my nephews. I hope that goes smoothly. Adam hasn't been to religion in weeks and is going tonight. He seems fine about it.

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KAILYNSTAR 4/3/2011 5:52PM

    Keeping yourself busy and doing things that you like. Great!



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HIPPIECHIC68 4/3/2011 10:43AM

    So glad you are having some good days...things will get back to the new normal...Paul, huh, I'll have to check it out...I'm always up for a good laugh! emoticon

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HARTKITTY 4/3/2011 8:05AM

    This is so great! you are sounding so much better and even Adam seems to be responding well to your choice to live a healthier happier life.

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MRDPOLING 4/3/2011 7:23AM

    I saw Paul the other day too. Man it was funny!

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Nice Friday...

Saturday, April 02, 2011

Wow didn't just have a date night it actually ended up being a date day yesturday! Joe has Fridays off but usually ends up spending a chunk of it at work anyway. Yesturday he only went in the morning. We went to lunch at one of my favorite places and I had an my usual there....yummy swordfish salad. Omg so good. We went home and watch Black Swan ondemand. My great friend Kate came over to hang out with the boys and we went to a new place for dinner and had a yummy seafood marinara plate. Then met some great friends for drinks and then off to get some frozen yogurt at this new really cool place that I must not frequent to often :). The kids had a great time with Kate (of course) and I really enjoyed myself. Strangely though I woke up in a funk. Not a big day altering funk but a funk no less. I'm really not sure why. I think Im coming down off the expectation that everyday will have some sort of stress or situation to resolve. Not that every day will be peaches but the crisis is calmed and I'm trying to navigate normal life again. Adam had another normal day. Thank God and I'm grateful. Not that things won't be trying but I guess I just have to try and remember how life can just be. I'm happy with just being but have to wrap my brain around it. Thanks for being here!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MRDPOLING 4/2/2011 8:19PM

    Normal... yeah what's that again? hehe!

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HIPPIECHIC68 4/2/2011 9:03AM

    Enjoy the peace while you have it! emoticon

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Want to thank my Spark friends...

Friday, April 01, 2011

Thank you so much for all of your comments. Through reading all of them I've realized that there are many layers to a mother child relationship. There is a huge spectrum of relationships out there and I need to find a healthy one with mine. When ever my mom would text me yesturday I was positive and brief. I've realized to have this healthy relationship I need to give my mom only what she needs to hear about our family. She can't transition from the mom who needs to protect and advise to one who can just be supportive and understanding. That's ok I just needed to know where we stood. Now I know I can put things in perspective and go to my husband and a couple good friends when I need to vent and just be. We will be ok. Change is hard. It can be unsettling. We just need to find our way through the next chapters in our lives. Adam was cranky with his brother last nigh but I'm chalking that up to teenager moodiness. That is what is so hard about this process is that he is dealing with all this and he is a teenager Ugggggg! So I will keep myself healthy so I can keep things in perspective. So about me: I went to my amazing Zumba class last night. It rocked my world! This class in particular usually does! Came home and popped the chicken in the oven while I got ready for bed. Had a very healthy dinner with family and watched American Idol. I had a Weight Watchers Cookies and Cream ice cream bar for dessert. Everybody thought they were pretty tasty. So they will stay on the rotation for grocery list. Have a great Friday and don't getting fooled to much today :)!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KAILYNSTAR 4/1/2011 1:31PM

    The joys of coping. That is exactly what you are doing and you're doing fine.

I have never really been the type to vent to my Mom or Dad let alone talk to them everyday. Not that they're not around or unavailable. It's just the way things are. I love my family, but I love my time without them too. Otherwise, the drama that one could get into.

Adam is a teenager and going through lots of things. He will eventually learn from his mistakes and good things that he has done in his life. I was fortunate to be the youngest in my family. Being the youngest is great. You see what your older siblings do and realize that there is no way you are going to pull that stunt!

I wonder if I can find that flavour of ice cream here. Haven't seen it on the shelves yet. Sounds yummy!

Glad that you are coping and getting on with things.

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VBPARROTHEAD 4/1/2011 9:59AM

  Sometimes it is hard to change because we are afraid of what can't be seen but you seem to have a much clearer view right now. Congratulations. It will take a while to get the relationship with your mother where you want it but you are on the right track!

And, yes, Adam is a teenager and there is a lot of angst and dramam in boys and girls at this age! They also are very "smart mouthed" and sarcastic. the thing I told myself when my girls were like this was, "They aren't brain dead like some think. they are actually really smart not just smart mouthed". Good luck through these teen years, they are a challenge!

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FREES1 4/1/2011 9:38AM

    things sound good - changing from a parent-child relatonshp to one of two adults can be a tough transition.. you'll make it... and kids will be kids - gay or straight - just like adults!

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HIPPIECHIC68 4/1/2011 9:05AM

    Go, you! You are doing fine...I'm trying really hard not to fool myself today!

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MRDPOLING 4/1/2011 8:23AM

    Sounds like you are really working on YOU good.

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KOREENREGIS 4/1/2011 7:14AM

  emoticon

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OK time to blog about me...

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Enough about mom and or kids or husband for that matter :). I had yummy omlette for breakfast. Egg whites, spinach, tomatoes, black olives and cheddar cheese lowfat. A cup of plain greek yogurt with sliced bananas for snack. I met hubby and our good friend for lunch at Chipolte. I had chicken burrito bowl with mild salsa and lettuce and a cup of unsweetened iced tea. I had a 1/2 cup of Activia plain yogurt with sliced granny smith apple for snack. I wasn't great with dinner last night. After my awesome dance class i came home stressed and had some prepackaged breaded chicken strips and 2 small pieces of frozen pizza :(. I will do better tonight. I'm defrosting boneless chicken breast and will marinate them with hot sauce :) yum! I'll have some broccoli and wax beans for sides. I have a Zumba class at 6pm and I'm really looking forward to it as usual. Tonights class is my favorite instructor. She makes you feel your at your favorite club at 1am bringing the roof down :). Have a healthy night!

  
  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIQUEY73 4/1/2011 9:11AM

    Sounds like you have a plan going forward to avoid another repeat. Good job! Enjoy your class!

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HARTKITTY 4/1/2011 5:56AM

    There you go! You must always love you best of all or you will have nothing to give anyone else. Take care of you, you are worth it. I'm glad you are enjoying your Zumba class emoticon

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KAILYNSTAR 3/31/2011 6:18PM

    Food sounds good.

I should make something for supper too. I am having a blank moment right now and I have no ambition to cook.

I did however go for a walk. It was great.

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FLUTTER-BY)L( 3/31/2011 6:06PM

    Having a plan is more than half the attle for me. Keep moving forward and you can do it.

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MRDPOLING 3/31/2011 3:15PM

    I tried a healthy scrambled egg recipe in the microwave yesterday evening for the first time. Mom and dad swear by 'em. Took like forever!!!!!! I won't be doing it that way again. LOL!

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FCARMICH 3/31/2011 2:59PM

  okay

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