What am I doing wrong?

Friday, July 30, 2010

So what am I doing wrong with this whole thing? I am STILL the same weight. On the 15th I was 205. Then I started SP again. On the 16th the scale said 202.8 and the 17th it said 201.4. It has stayed 201.4 since that point. I have burned calories and stayed around 1500-1550 for calories. Am I still eating too much? I think the 205 was inaccurate (maybe I had just ate or didn't take it at the same time I usually do??), but I would think that 2 weeks later it should have moved from 201.4. Any thoughts?? I've been eating lots of salads, getting fruits, some breads, meats, nuts, cheese, water... I'm not sure what the problem is. When I started SP 2 years ago I just tracked food at first and didn't exercise and the weight came off very quickly at first before it slowed down towards the end. I am measuring everything and doing it the same way I was then, plus exercising. You can see my trackers on my page. What do you think?

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KRIBBY101 7/30/2010 1:21PM

I don't think you are doing anything wrong... I think, in the beginning of starting out weight loss, folks should leave the scale alone. How do you feel after regular exercise and eating better? The weight will come off, despite the way weight loss plans and websites discuss weight loss the human body really isn't a science experiment. Report Inappropriate Comment

DARCYINMO 7/30/2010 12:40PM

Stick with the 3 "S"'s when you weigh in..... Wear the SAME clothes, use the SAME scale and weigh in at the SAME time.... see if that helps. Report Inappropriate Comment

SNEVIL1 7/30/2010 9:21AM

I've been trying to cut out the fried food. I think yesterday the only thing I had was 3 chicken selects. If I have a choice I've been going grilled. I was thinking the snacks might be an issue, but wasn't sure how to get around that. Right now I am teaching summer school, so I am up at 5:15, breakfast at 5:45, leave the house at 6, at school at 7, I get a 20 minute break at 10:15, and I'm done summer school at 12:45. I'm usually home by 2:00. By this time I was so hungry I thought I was going to pass out while driving home and would usually stop and get Subway or a fast food salad. I've been packing a lunch and eating snacks during the break. I've noticed that I'm not too bad driving home and since I've been eating little things more frequently by the end of the day I feel pretty good and not enraged with hunger like before. I was also taking a calculus class at night, so I would come home at 2, eat, leave at 5, and not get home until 9:45 (and would then usually eat again). I haven't been eating as late anymore and when I did SP before snacking with smaller meals did seem to help. Do you think the snacking is what the problem is right now? I need to go to the store and buy more fruits to add as snacks like I was doing before versus the 100 calorie packs. I'm also trying to stretch my funds out. I have about $12 to last me another week unless I want to add to my growing thousands in credit card debt. Oh the joys of adulthood Report Inappropriate Comment

embarrassed

Thursday, July 15, 2010

So after stepping on the scale this morning I realized that I have been avoiding SP because I am humiliated. I am now back up to my original weight when I started SP in July 2008.... just over 200 lbs How do I deserve to be a SP motivator and how did this happen? I have been trying to be good and if I have to eat on the run I get salads or Subway, but the weight just keeps adding and adding and adding. I don't feel good in my clothes and even the "big" clothes I had to buy are starting to get tight. I didn't want to get back onto SP until my weight back down so I wouldn't have to type my weight into the tracker... but I don't think that is going to happen any time soon. The other day I went over to a friends house and her 2nd grader said "Ms Sara, you have fat arms. You must have a lot of meat on your bones." How mortifying! Surprisingly I am relatively happy in other areas of my life... I survived my first year teaching and am doing my second year of summer school right now. I love my school and miss my regular school year kids. My boyfriend and I are still going strong and it has been over 6 years. Money is still tight, as always, and I am still helping take care of my boyfriend's 92 yr old grandfather... I think that has been a contributor to my reduction in going to the gym. It is nice living with my boyfriend, but granddad's house is almost near PA (42 mile drive one way to summer school and about 35-40 minute drive to day school). In the past year I have put over 28,500 miles on my new car and am constantly driving from here to there. I still have my apartment, which is close to my day school, but I only stop in to feed my cat and then run to the next place. It would be ideal to not have the apartment, but I'm afraid granddad will accidentally let the cat out if I bring him to the house... plus there is no room at the house for all of the stuff in my apartment (i.e. furniture, appliances, clothes, teacher materials, etc.). However... saving hundreds of dollars a month would be pretty nice. Since money is tight I haven't been going to the store as much and with sharing a fridge again it's hard to keep healthy food away from other people's stomachs. However, I eat breakfast at 5:45 before I leave for summer school and then don't end up eating lunch until around 2, so by this time I am near the point of passing out and mentally going through the menu of every fast food restaurant in the 40+ trip home. Plus I didn't mention that I am starting a master's program. I've been taking a prerequisite calculus class that is tues and thurs evenings until 9:30, so that's also reduced my desire to exercise, but I really need to change that. I packed my gym bag and am going to at least walk after summer school today and before my night class. It is just really depressing because I know that even in a year I might not be back down to where I was before. I used to be so cute and so active... Even though my boyfriend is still supportive and finds me attractive, it is frustrating to always yo-yo back and forth between extreme weights. Plus we are approaching a time where we might get engaged sometime in the near future. I haven't been taking pictures of us recently and don't feel pretty in pictures... the rings that I wear now are getting tight, so I would like to be at my previous weight when this major life event occurs, you know?? I guess just overall I am sad and depressed because I know how much work it is going to take and how slowly the results are going to occur. I've enjoyed going out to a local bar with friends, but fruity drinks have added to the problem. My boyfriend and I also enjoy going out to dinner (versus seeing a movie and other "date" activities), so I need to make better choices when out. It is just really hard with my schedule, the amount that I work, and the little amount of sleep I am already getting to fit in one more thing, but I definitely need to exercise again. My gym is near my apartment, so it's around 40 minutes from the house. Granddad lives in the middle of the country, so I wouldn't be ok with walking on the street and don't really have a desire to be outside through trails, trees, and fields (not a fan of ticks....). Maybe I can give myself a starting goal of going to the gym once during the week and once on the weekend. The last time I was really going regularly was July 09, but I went once in January, once in March, and once in April. I want my old body back.... I feel like the person in the mirror really isn't me. I've never had this much fat even just on my pelvis area and was actually thinking the other day that maybe it would be good to be preg just so I'd have an excuse for my stomach. My legs look like cottage cheese and my bra can't contain my back fat. It is terrible and I wish it could just go away! So after all this crying and complaining I think I've decided that my goals are going to be going to the gym once during the week and once on the weekend for now. I drastically need to start getting back into that routine. I am also going to try to track my food again, but that was really time consuming and time is not on my side right now... so i will do the best I can with that. I also feel that I need to start packing healthy snacks again, so after I get some paychecks and my other bills are paid off I need to do a grocery sweep and get some fruits, veggies, and other healthy snacks. Finally, I need to start turning down the soda and drink water again. I feel like when I am at my class late at night or trying to manage on little sleep a sprite gives me a little kick and helps push through. I also had a small iced caramel latte from Dunkin Donuts during the school year (skim milk and sugar added). This is not as bad as my old favorite (Starbuck's Double Chocolate Chip frappaccino with whipped cream), but probably isn't helping given my low level of activity. So I guess we will start from there and I will stop avoiding the scale. It just seems like there is a huge task in front of me with not much hope and requiring way too much work, but I guess that's what I get

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

EDUCGRAD 7/18/2010 4:33PM

Big hugs to you.You will get it back off.the past few months have been really hard,the end of the school year was rough,then hubby has been out of work.got on scale this morning 148. Report Inappropriate Comment

SNEVIL1 7/18/2010 4:27PM

we have been trying to cook together more. We set up a savings account for a house, so weve been trying to save more versus eating out. Hes also been ordering salads more with dinner versus fries. The masters has to be now... its a cohort, so my county pays the tuition and i only pay 150 per class. Its a three yr program that starts next fall, but when it starts new people cant join until that round is over. I took a class this summer that was tues and thurs nights (6-915). It went pretty well. My class in the fall will also be tues and thurs (5-7something). It should be doable. The work will be more difficult, but i have so much done from my first yr teaching thats now out of the way. Ill just be glad when its done. My bf is also job hunting, so when everything gets settles and we arent just relying on my income thatll be great. Just ready for some stability... but overall ive been good the last two days foodwise. Havent gone back to the gym yet, but at least im getting food under control Report Inappropriate Comment

HDHAWK 7/18/2010 4:18PM

I know how you feel Sara. I've regained and had plenty of time to get it off. Now, my wedding is 7 weeks away and all I can do is try to lose what I can in that time. Your bf is supportive. Could you guys try cooking a few things together instead of eating out as much? I almost think I'd put the masters on hold for a bit. It's a lot to take on when you're a new teacher. Feel free to check in often if you want and we'll see if we can get each other back on track. Report Inappropriate Comment

SNEVIL1 7/17/2010 10:25AM

Hey judi. Its nice hearing from u. I guess with my life being what it is, eating what i wanted and not exercising what my way for a "sara day" and to keep my sanity... but now its making me unhappy. Last night before we went out my bf suggested i take off the tank top i was wearing and put on a tshirt. I guess as my jeans r getting tighter the belly bulge was getting worse. It almost brought me to tears at the thought of going to a ladies night at a bar in a tshirt. I didnt drink when i was there, which was miserable cuz it was $10 bottomless cups (so for a poor 22 year old is such a tempting deal). Plus he was trying to be nice and buy me food. He got mozz sticks which sat at the table and wanted to buy me this chocolate gooey brownie explosion with icecream and hot fudge. I didnt eat anything, but it was that much more miserable. I dont enjoy working out and i can only take so many salads. I enjoy going out and trying fun dishes and fun drinks. It seems like it can only be one or the other. However, i refuse to shop at a plus size store and the tank tops last night were xl's, so im done. I am fun and like to have fun and can be attractive, but my body is getting in the way of that. I wldnt even want to get engaged right now because i wouldnt want my picture taken. So i dont know. However, tracking my food the last two days made me realize that ive probably been eating close to 3000+ calories, so im going to try to keep with tracking it and making better choices. Im trying to see if my stepsister will exercise with me today (shes the cutest... 5'2, same age as me, prob 100lbs, good dancer, athletic, popular, smart... perfect). Only thing is we like like 45-55 mins away from each other so we'll see. But on a good note, since two days ago i went from 205 to 201.4, so atleast thats something. Thanks again for all ur support. Its what i need right now Report Inappropriate Comment

JUDI_CUTIE 7/17/2010 12:22AM

Hi Sara, I just saw your status and I came over to read your blog. I am so sorry to hear about your discouraging weight news. I am mostly sorry to hear that you are unhappy about it. The actual weight itself is less of a problem. I know that you can get back down again. It won't be easy, but you have done it before, so you know what to do. Life can be very stressful and busy, and it is hard to make good choices when you don't have the time or energy. And life cannot stand still so you just have to do the best you can. Just recently, I took on a little too much tutoring, and I picked up a student in Differential Equations (which I have not had in 36 years!) I have gotten myself pretty stressed about it. That combined with a visit from my kids which involved some extra eating has caused me to gain three pounds. It doesn't sound like much, but I almost never gain weight. I have been mostly going downward or staying the same for over two years. (Lately more staying the same, but this gain is getting my attention!) So, reading about how you gained back your weight is going to help me decide to get back on track. I am about to meet with my life coach/business coach/diet coach. She helps me get my priorities straight. It has been a really long time since I had a "Judi Day", that's for sure! So, dear Sara, I want to offer you some encouragement and hope. I like the way you realize that there are many good things in your life. That is a good trait. And I have always felt that you are wise beyond your years. You will figure this out! I'm rooting for you. Judi Report Inappropriate Comment

SNEVIL1 7/16/2010 7:37AM

I do have a treadmill that is at my mom's house. I will check to see if my bf's dad is ok with me putting it in the basement. Granddad's house is very old and has a lot of stuff in it, so I'm not sure... but never know until you ask. So yesterday wasn't too bad. I tracked my food and made conscious decisions about what I was going to eat. The hardest thing about Tues and Thurs is that I have summer school then my night class so I eat breakfast at 5:30, lunch at 2:00, and dinner at 9:30. There is absolutely no food allowed in the school, so when 2 comes around I am so hungry I can barely make it home. I ate a few pieces of dried fruit during my night class so I wasn't too hungry, but the long gap in between meals kills me. But, overall I think I did ok. However, I must've been consuming a great deal of calories if yesterday's number of calories was me trying to limit things. I was on calorieking.com when I was on my phone at Outback and found out that a small, 4 slice Alice Springs Chicken Quesadilla is 1000 calories! Report Inappropriate Comment

JESSSPARK 7/15/2010 10:58AM

Well you seem to have identified a lot of your problems, which is great! Being able to do that tells me you CAN control the issues! Report Inappropriate Comment

KRIBBY101 7/15/2010 9:03AM

Something has got to give. It is clear that you are not taking care of yourself. If you don't start you KNOW things won't get any better. It is wonderful that you are positive and you are doing things you want and need to do but your first priority should always be your health... you already know this. How many times have you heard someone say, "If you don't have your health, you don't have anything". You know it is true. You can put your health last for a number of years but eventually things will catch up to you and all the people and things you are taking care of right now really won't matter, because you will be sick. Seriously. You know what is disturbing to me? For the first time in history younger generations of people are NOT living longer than pervious ones. It is our lifestyles. It's mine. It's yours. You must take care of yourself. Prune some of these activities or make them work in the context of putting you and your health first. Put an exercise bike in granddads house. Buy a treadmill. I don't know what will work for you but I want you to know I believe you must make some tweaks. You have to. You know it. I am sure you can be successful. The proof is in your MOD award. The proof is in your memory of all that worked for you before. Report Inappropriate Comment

RUNNER_TIFF_07 7/15/2010 8:50AM

You can do this Sara! You really can turn it around! And you deserve to be a motivator... even those who lead have their own troubles sometimes! Have you tried tracking your food again? That might help you get back on track. Report Inappropriate Comment

pretty depressed

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

Hey spark... haven't been around for a while. Who knew my first yr teaching wld be this crazy? But good news is that I'm not staying up at midnight anymore and have been trying to keep my work at school... I'm still up at 430 to get to school by 6, but I do feel more relaxed at home and on weekends. However, bad news is I still haven't been able to manage going to the gym much. Even worse news, I got on the scale and it was basically what it was when I started sp. Now its in the evening and I've had dinner and such... also my scale has been banged around a little bit so maybe its slightly off but omg. How did I gain almost 40 lbs since last summer!? What's worse is I don't see a solution in sight. I wanted to go to the gym today but I was at school till 6, still have 3 teams to prepare for this week, still have no lessons ready for tomorrow, and wasn't home till 7. At least next year I'm just going to be a math teacher vs a fulltime math teacher and special educator, but that doesn't help me now. I feel gross, my clothes don't fit, I'm uncomfortable, etc. Everyone says to prioritize and take time for u, but I donno how to make that work. Do I walk into my 90 min class tom with no lesson (suicide!) or go to team and tell the parent, student, and iep chair "oh sorry. I didn't finish that ed assessment or team reports"? The prob is that everything has top priority. Gotta say I feel pretty miserable:(

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FUZZY1TOO 6/3/2010 7:11AM

Like any good teacher, you'd probably encourage your kids to keep trying. To not give up. Practice makes perfect. And any number of platitudes along those lines. Remember that, and don't give up on yourself. You CAN get back there. It's tough trying to prove yourself when you're a junior teacher in a teaching team. You'll get back. Just don't give up. Everyone has the potential for honour roll, it's just whether or not you decide to go for it! Report Inappropriate Comment

SNEVIL1 4/7/2010 8:00PM

Gotta say I feel like some of my kids... even if u go from a 30% to a 40% an E is still an E so what's the point. I feel like I've got too far to go, you know? I'm tracking my food today and went to the gym, but I was so freaking hungry driving home it was miserable. I just kept thinking about a grilled chick salad from mcdonalds or wendys or a nice subway turkey sub. Oh well. Ill try to keep doing some things and maybe ill get lucky with some results Report Inappropriate Comment

TRISTANH 4/7/2010 12:14AM

I'm thinking of you! Regardless, you're still an inspiration to me. At least you're aware and wanting to keep going! I'm sorry that you're having a tough time though. Remember that we're all here for support should you need it. Report Inappropriate Comment

HDHAWK 4/6/2010 10:26PM

Hi! Haven't seen you around in ages. I'm in the same boat. I ended up with way too much going on and regained about 25 lbs. I'm finally on the way back to losing it. The first year is tough, and yes, there is a ton of paperwork in special ed. It will get better. Even if you can walk for 10 min. do it. It's a start. I completely understand where you're coming from and how frustrated you are. I'm getting married in 5 months and have to get this back off! Report Inappropriate Comment

SNEVIL1 4/6/2010 10:05PM

Lol as I'm reading these suggestions I got my bill for my graduate school prerrquisite calc class... feeling broke and fat (during my time of the month) is the worse combo lol. I have been buying more clothes that I can wear to school, but again the money situation is depressing. I shld try to find my pedometer. I do run around like a crazy person during the day and take the stairs vs elevator. Parking far away isn't the safest at my school (esp since I'm at school 4 hrs after school closes). I packed up a gym bag and am going to try to go tom after school. My school is near my apt and gym then my bfs gdads house where I've been staying is about 40 mins away (back roads... pretty farms and horses). Since I'm payn for the gym and really do like the facilities id like to try to fit it in that I can go again. Once this busy patch slows down maybe I can get my friend to go too. Well see. Sometimes I just like going alone vs having to sched round other families and their kids. Thanks for the encouragement tho. I pack my lunch everyday and have still stuck with 100cal snacks and soup, lite yogurt, etc. I just need to watch dinners and reduce eating out. I was doing that a lot. I'm also going to try to up my water again. Ill keep u updated Report Inappropriate Comment

KRIBBY101 4/6/2010 9:32PM

Yeah, the job sucks the first year. Sometimes the second, the third, and the fourth. Balance is a hard thing to manage while you are learning the job and when you have so many responsibilities. Honestly, putting yourself first is supposed to be the answer, but how are you supposed to do that if you have so much to do? Seriously, I'd go shopping for clothing you look cute in and make you feel good... confidence is so important. Make sure you are managing your food-- people always say it is 80% of the battle. I'd also wear a pedometer and start tracking your steps so you at least start to feel successful about your daily activity. You used to rave about stability ball exercises-- I'd commit to a 10 minute workout routine every morning. You can spare 10 minutes-- gosh, I know it is hard when you aren't prepared for class but you have to do it. Even if your body doesn't manufacture results after just a 10 min workout (I know my body has to have 60 or 90 minutes of exercise a day to drop weight) the workout will do your happy brain chemistry good. The gym isn't everything, especially when you can't get there. One thing about teaching I think is key is to make a routine-- have routine lesson plans even that have similar components that you can quickly fit in workable activities. Report Inappropriate Comment

MYSHERIANN 4/6/2010 8:44PM

I'm so sorry you're feeling so down. Lord knows I've felt EXACTLY like you're feeling. Overwhelmed and down and feels like there's NO WAY OUT.. To be honest, I don't know how you CAN'T AFFORD NOT TO WORK OUT....it sounds like you NEED the energy! Remember the little steps are the sneaky steps that get that weight OFF the scale. For example.....grab a walking pedometer and challenge yourself a FEW EXTRA STEPS a day! Make it a PROMISE to walk TEN-minutes a day, that's it! Only 10-minutes devoted to STEP-TAKING. Then watch your pedometer and challenge yourself. Park a little further from the building, take the stairs, step while you're on the phone, etc. It's amzing how much it builds up!! THERE IS HOPE AND THERE IS LIGHT.......YOU CAN DO IT!!! If you don't take care of YOU, who will? Report Inappropriate Comment

RUNNER_TIFF_07 4/6/2010 7:59PM

Hey girl! I think you need to take a breath! What about your weekends? Do you make it to the gym then? And what about short bursts of exercise throughout the day? You could take a walk on your lunch break... or sneak in the strength training (pushups, lunges, etc) between classes maybe? I know you're busy but even a little is better then nothing. Oh, and how's your eating? Being healthy is 80% nutrition, 20% fitness. If you can focus yourself on healthy eating (healthy snacks and meals, well-balanced with enough fiber/protein to keep you full for longer). I know you can figure this out. It's good that you stepped on the dreaded scale -- now you know that something's gotta change. You may not be able to change your work schedule until next school year but you need to find a way to make your life more balanced... and I really think you can find a way to do that. Change what you CAN change (like adding in short bursts of fintess, eating healthy, etc) and accept the things you have NO control over at the moment (your work schedule, priorities with work projects). You're only going to drive yourself crazy thinking about all the things in your way, ya know? Report Inappropriate Comment

Wii Fit Plus

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

So I just got my new Wii Fit. I tried it out and it was pretty fun. I'm hoping this will help me get back on the fitness train.

  

Hello Gym

Sunday, January 10, 2010

So I've been MIA for a while and haven't been to the gym since July. I am just about halfway through my first year of teaching and it has been very intense. The amount of planning and extra work I've been doing consumes every moment of my day. I leave at 5:10am to get to school and come home late. I've been trying to pack good lunches, but the gym has been put on the back burner. I've also allowed occasional fast food to slip in more and more. I've noticed that the pounds have been creeping back and my clothes aren't fitting as nicely anymore. Last night I went to a bar with the bf and a friend and realized that I'm starting to feel uncomfortable again. Enough is enough.

So I'm proud to say that today I made it a priority and went to the gym. I worked out for an hour and a half and logged in my food for the day. Due to state testing this week I've only had to plan for 1 class (as opposed to 3) and I can't say that I'm caught up with my grading, but oh well. It'll get done eventually I guess. I got a Wii for xmas so I played that over break, but I need to get to the gym more often. Just like before... babysteps will get you somewhere. The hardest part was starting. Hope everyone has been doing well:)

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ALLIE4993 2/1/2010 11:15AM

Awesome job!!! yes i agree babysteps do get you somewhere...as long as you are putting in the effort! good job girl! Report Inappropriate Comment

RUNNER_TIFF_07 1/10/2010 7:46PM

Yay! Good for you for putting fitness on your list of priorities :). You'll get there! Report Inappropriate Comment