SLENDERELLA61   158,726
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Is That Me in the Mirror?

Friday, October 29, 2010

Every morning I wake up and look in the mirror. There is still, even after about a year at BMI 20.2-21, a certain amount of surprise. It's not really that I expect to see me fat again, it is more like I don't have an image of myself right now that I do expect to see.

In a way this morning surprise is good for me. When I'm not happy with the number on the scale, or I'm feeling bad about what I didn't quit eating the day before, the morning surprise helps me to be grateful, recognize what I have accomplished, and recommit to healthy eating.

I'm now one pound over what I was the day I left for my mom's house and four pounds over my "happy weight." I'll get there.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLIMLILA 11/3/2010 12:48AM

    I hope to someday get to the point where I look in the mirror and like what I see. Many times (and for many years- because I have been 40 lbs. heavier than I am now) I didn't even look in a mirror at all... But when I do see myself now, it's not the picture of me I have in my mind.... I somewhere back there see the way I was as a young adult before I gained all the weight... thanks for your support and encouragement and jsut being here...Lila

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MONTY68 10/29/2010 5:25PM

    Hi Marsha
I love your blog, One of the great things about being on a journey to healthy living is the awareness of who we are. With that knowledge, quicker action can be taken when we find a little increase in weight. It also means taking responsibility for what went wrong, you do that well.
As far as looking in the mirror and seeing yourself as you are, it can feel like it is a surprise and perhaps who is that person?. I believe that you will eventually acknowledge it in a way that it is just who you are.
Before I went on my plan, I don't remember if I ever saw me in the mirror, I didn't even realize what I looked like until I saw my before picture and that was after I released the weight. I was shocked. I Do look in the mirror now and I like what I see and what I have accomplished, BUT I know that it is me. I really don't focus on who I was 3 years ago,.
I know for you that you will get back to your happy weight, I also believe that you will also get more comfortable with your new appearance and really know that it is you. You are a fantastic example on how to be successful and I believe have motivated a number of Spark members.
Keep looking in the mirror, smile and say good morning Marsha and enjoy all that you have done for you.
Thank you for sharing this.

emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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WALKINGANNIE 10/29/2010 4:20PM

    I had a simliar experience this morning! I caught sight of my reflection while I was crossing the bedroom in my underwear. I quite like my shape now! Pity about the skin though where I've lost the weight. It's still a bit uneven on my stomach where I carried the most weight.

emoticon emoticon

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KALIGIRL 10/29/2010 4:14PM

    You WILL get there!

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PARKERB2 10/29/2010 1:48PM

    You're proven to yourself you can do it so the 4lbs should be breeze for you.

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MEXGAL1 10/29/2010 12:37PM

    Yes you will get there. Believe!

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JOYINKY 10/29/2010 12:34PM

    I see it; still have a hard time believing it after all this time. Mind is stuck in a size 14; it's what allowed me to gain too---I didn't really see myself then either! Have to admit, I didn't look in the mirror as much though! I'm really more grateful for how I feel and what I can do today than how I look; but, I enjoy how I look too. It's all definitely worth it!

"Who I am really keeps surprising me."
- Poet Nikki Giovanni

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IDEBORAH 10/29/2010 10:33AM

    I'm right there with you. Even a few pounds over my "happy weight" I still feel grateful when looking in the mirror or catching my reflection in store windows. The recommitting to healthy eating/healthy living is the truly important part. Congrats for getting that down. Way to be. I'm impressed.

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HAPPYSOUL91 10/29/2010 10:24AM

    Body gets smaller, brain remains fat for quite awhile but it does change (speaking from experience)

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DONNABRIGHT 10/29/2010 9:37AM

    I think it has something to do with the life long struggle with weight.

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JHADZHIA 10/29/2010 9:16AM

    For sure you will!!! I am not one for looking in the mirror. Don't need to except for flossing my teeth. Close cropped hair and no make up means no fuss. Hit the ground running :) I understand what you mean, but I am still new at maintenance at only 8 months.. We always tend to dwell in the past. Its to the future we must look. We have created a new reality we must accept. I am not quite there yet. Choosing baggy clothes is still what I feel most comfortable in, because that is always what I have worn. It doesn't help that even on maintenance, I still have a 'pot' :((
Keep up your fantastic work, and don't sweat the small stuff, you are doing great. keep telling yourself that until you believe it!!

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RAYLINSTEPHENS 10/29/2010 8:52AM

    I know you will!

I no longer remember what once was.

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TRACI175 10/29/2010 8:28AM

    Sounds like you are in the right mind set. Keep up the good work

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Bragging Again

Thursday, October 28, 2010

I just answered trivia questions 67, 68, and 69 for the month. I don't show up on the leaderboards because I was gone for a week and many, many people have answered more questions than I. However, this is the first month that on day 28 I am still at 100% correct! Admittedly, I often get questions I've had before. At least I learn the right answers. I think bragging -- just a little -- is in order! Have a healthy and happy day, everyone!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

WALKINGANNIE 10/28/2010 4:51PM

    You earned the bragging rights!
emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MEXGAL1 10/28/2010 4:13PM

    Wow good for you. I keep trying and haven't ever been that accurate.
Go for it!

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RAYLINSTEPHENS 10/28/2010 3:54PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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GATOR12 10/28/2010 3:52PM

    YOU do got BRAGGING rights, girl. I'll never get there. But as you say I learn somethings. True some guesses are wrong and later I can't remember which I wrongly guessed.

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PARKERB2 10/28/2010 2:51PM

    emoticonYou rock!

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KALIGIRL 10/28/2010 1:28PM

    Definitely in order emoticon

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JHADZHIA 10/28/2010 12:23PM

    Very well done!! Yes, they do repeat questions. I didn't do so well this month. Very poorly. No chance of a trophy this time, that is for sure..
Keep up the great streak!

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DONNABRIGHT 10/28/2010 10:31AM

    I'm still aiming for the 90's but I am holding at 83% this month. I do learn something everytime I answer wrong and sometimes it is a guess and I learn from that so I consider it a good use of time.

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JOYINKY 10/28/2010 7:12AM

    emoticon emoticon
An amazing feat! Be proud! One of the things I like about this site is it's a safe place to brag; encouraged even! Because we know what a real accomplishment it is!
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ONEKIDSMOM 10/28/2010 6:47AM

    emoticon Well done, Marsha! emoticon

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DAV128 10/28/2010 5:52AM

    Congrats, a little bragging is good for motivation. Keep up the good work!


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Quick Update

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Glad to report that mom is doing better than I had feared. I wish to heavens she lived much closer. Having her half a continent away is not good for either of us at this point, but she is competent and I don't think that situation will change, despite my attempts.

During my break from Sparking I made many healthy choices and some that were not so much. I did get my cardio and strength training (mom's retirement community has a gym) completed. I need to get refocused on portion control. Will do.

Missed my SparkFriends!! -Marsha

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

ONEKIDSMOM 10/28/2010 6:51AM

    Missed you, too... I've been a little light on the Spark time, myself the past week or so. So I'm catching up on blog entries a few days later. Glad your mom's OK... change is hard, so that half a continent away thing? Yeah, not likely to change short of an emergency.

I've been through that scenario, but it was me that lived at a distance, and at least I had siblings local to my folks who I trusted completely to keep an eye on things. Still drove me slightly crazy with anxiety, but... what can a body do? Trust, take care of yourself, and remember you're worth it!

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SUNRISESUNSET 10/27/2010 8:01PM

    Thanks for the support on my page!

It doesn't matter if you slipped up - it was for a good reason. I hope she gets well soon. You're lucky to have each other. emoticon

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JOYINKY 10/26/2010 6:49PM

    Glad your Mom is still doing well; it is a difficult time for all and triggers difficult decisions. Sounds like things will be ok for awhile yet. You were missed but I had no doubt that you would do well. Portion control is so much easier at home. I do hope you enjoyed your time in AZ. Have visited my sister there. Beautiful, but not for me either. Welcome back! Joy

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AQUAGIRL08 10/26/2010 5:16PM

    We missed you too Marsha. I'm so glad that you're back. I saw your car at the Y but I couldn't find you this morning. I just did deep water at 10:30 instead of my usual 8a.m. schedule. Don't work too hard this week!

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MONTY68 10/26/2010 3:48PM

It is good to hear that your mom is doing better than you thought. I also understand the distance thing. I came to Florida 17 years ago today, to be with my parents and take care of them. It seems that what you are saying is that your mom isn't willing to move close to you.
It also was good to see that you were able to keep up with your needs with your exercise and also really with your food.
I am glad you are back, thanks for sharing this news.

Monty emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MEXGAL1 10/26/2010 3:34PM

    so glad that your Mom is doing better and glad that you are back to sparking. Now you can energize and focus on you and sparking.
Best of everything,

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WALKINGANNIE 10/26/2010 1:16PM

    Pleased to hear that your Mom is doing better than you had feared Marsha. It must be difficult for you to be so far apart.

Knowing you, I'm not surprised that you continued to make healthy choices and I'm sure that you will soon get back in the groove with the portion control.

Missed you while you were away.

emoticon emoticon

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MONKEYSNUFFER 10/26/2010 11:55AM

    Glad your mom is OK.

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SLENDERELLA61 10/26/2010 11:39AM

    No, I'm not moving to Arizona. My mom raised me in Florida. She moved. My grandkids and daughter need me here. They live .5 a mile from me. My sister is here. My neice and nephew are here. Wish we were all together.

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PARKERB2 10/26/2010 10:44AM

    Welcome back, have a good day, hang in there and Keep Sparking. emoticon

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DONNABRIGHT 10/26/2010 10:41AM

    We missed you, too!

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RAYLINSTEPHENS 10/26/2010 10:09AM

    Welcome back Marsha!

I hear you - my dad was only 3 miles away and it made my life more difficult. Now that he lives in my front yard, things are easier on all of us.

Is your mother hoping you will move to where she lives? That happens too.

So glad your trip went well!

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HAPPYSOUL91 10/26/2010 9:59AM

    Cheering you on to re-focus and yup portion control is the key

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POSEY440 10/26/2010 8:46AM

    portion control is my biggest problem too I think.

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KALIGIRL 10/26/2010 8:46AM

    Here's to refocus!
Glad to hear your mom is well - wishing you the best on the next part of your journey with her. Hope you include your kids so they can learn as you do.

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Do you shower before gym? Clean before the maid?

Saturday, October 16, 2010

This morning I woke up and my plans were to go to the gym within a couple hours. It somehow seemed silly, but I had this overwhelming desire to take a shower. So I did. I went to the gym clean, did my strength training and then an hour of Zumba. I was totally dripping with sweat. I guess it was cleaner sweat than it would have been without the shower!!?! Maybe I was more comfortable than I would have been without the shower!??! Then I spent some time on the elliptical, and you guessed it, I took a quick shower. I put on my suit and swam 16 laps. Then, you guessed it again, I showered and washed my hair again.

The whole time I kept thinking of my mom. She used to make fun of people who cleaned when the maid was coming!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PARKERB2 10/19/2010 12:49PM

    I shower even after my workout at lunch here at work. Same thing for the hot tub. So I don't think you weird at all. Have a good day. It's always a joy to read your blogs.

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PAULASTRAS 10/17/2010 11:04PM

    Maid? I wish I ad a maid, someone to clean up after me lol

Shower? most of the time , like to feel clean......squeaky clean lol

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AQUAGIRL08 10/17/2010 9:21PM

    I don't think you are weird at all Marsha!

I wish I had someone to come and help me clean - I'm supposed to but I don't right now. When I did, I always made sure the house was picked up at the very least.

I don't shower before I take a water class (they do ask you to rinse off before going into the pool) but I do shower afterwards. If I'm going to exercise on land and I haven't showered since the day before I will take a shower before exercising. I don't want to gross anyone out! I always shower after exercise because if I don't, my skin becomes irritated. I've been known to take several showers in one day depending upon how sweaty I get. I try to only wash my hair once a day because it is so dry. Good hygiene doesn't mean that you have to take long, hot showers, it just means that you have to wash the sweat off your body and freshen up! A quick shower is fine.

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WALKINGANNIE 10/17/2010 11:44AM

    This routine sounds very considerate Marsha.

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DONNABRIGHT 10/17/2010 10:08AM

    Now that is clean!

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JOYINKY 10/17/2010 6:57AM

    Well, I wouldn't regularly have a morning like that; but could. If I swim, I do shower before and after and may have showered that morning. Maid??? I wish!

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SLIMLILA 10/16/2010 11:11PM

    Wow, any reason why? I know I have showered in the a.m. and then had a bath at nite, but it's to enjoy the relaxing bath that I have the second bath. I had plans to go to school today and work, but got caught up with trying to do an on-line purchase that took hours with dial-up and then when they sent me the e-books and I tried to download them, one was supposed to take over an hour, but after 3 attempts that failed, we gave up and sent an email requesting help.

So that was my whole day, wasn't nearly as fun as yours....

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POLARBEARSCAT 10/16/2010 10:52PM

    I've showered before Zumba just to be sure I didn't get smelly with the sweat! emoticon

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MONTY68 10/16/2010 10:50PM

    Ok Marsha
The part of your title that caught my eye was the maid thing. Are you saying I am not suppose to clean before the cleaning lady comes? Well, I think she would turn around and leave if I didn't clean up. emoticon
As far as showering, wow you do shower a lot. If I am going to a class like zumba, tai chi or balancing I shower before I go, but not when I am done. I also don't shower before I walk or use the equipment at the gym. BUT , I do shower before I walk with my walking partner, and the reason is all those other things I mentioned that I don't shower for.
I guess the idea of showering certainly has to be a individual choice and if that is what you do, then it is a good thing. Great topic, are you sure I don't have to clean before the cleaning lady comes? Thanks for sharing this.

Monty emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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MEXGAL1 10/16/2010 8:27PM

    you are too funny...but nope, do not shower before exercising...but i do pick things up before the maid comes so she can find the dirt.

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WILD4STARS 10/16/2010 7:51PM

    I'm laughing at you as I'm also laughing at myself. Sometimes I just can't leave the house without a shower, even if it's to go walking. My hair is flat to my head and I just feel YUCKY! (Yucky is a technical term!) I know I'm going to need to shower again, but I just feel better, feel more energized when my body, (and my hair) is clean!

And I DO NOT clean the house before the maid comes.

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PATTISWIMMER 10/16/2010 7:31PM

    well do what you feel like you don't have pool hair yet when you swim every day emoticon

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LIZZIECA55 10/16/2010 7:30PM

    That's funny. I don't shower before I workout, but I do clean before the maid comes. LOL!!

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JHADZHIA 10/16/2010 7:27PM

    If you are not careful, you are really going to dry your skin out with all the washing up! Swimming pools do appreciate people showering before going in them and that is the only time I shower before a workout! Taking a hot shower before a workout would actually help loosen you up and so wouldn't be all that bad an idea..

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RAYLINSTEPHENS 10/16/2010 7:22PM

    I do hope you are moisturizing with all those showers?

There's clean which feels great but you can also be drying out your skin.

My mother used to tell me to clean after the company went home, not before they got there.

Nope - she never practiced what she preached either, lol.

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BEGONIAC 10/16/2010 7:20PM

    I can't function if I don't wash my hair every morning. It's like coffee to me. Funny how we all work differently! emoticon

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MARDGY 10/16/2010 7:15PM

    I sometimes get that way if I know that I had not taken a shower the day before. Other than that I think that working out is meant for being a bit stinky and if people are offended then they must not be working hard enough on themselves to be worried about my hygiene.

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OUTDOORGIRL69 10/16/2010 7:12PM

    I don't go to the gym, but I do tale a shower before & after working out on my treadmill.
Yes when I stay at a motel I clean the room before I leave it. I think that is because I manage a motel & I see how people leave the room. Most likely I would clean up if I had a maid come in.

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Friday, October 15, 2010

I'm getting ready to fly to Tucson on Monday to visit my elderly mother. I hope to be some help to her as we review her situation.

I am debating whether to track my food while I'm gone or not. I'll only be gone five days. Could take my Weight Watcher paper trackers; probably won't have Internet access. But actually I am leaning toward just taking a healthy attitude and doing the best I can. The last time I visited mom in July I didn't track and I did okay. That visit was 11 days. But last month when the baby was born I didn't track for three days and really messed up. Actually, I wrote "really messed up," but it only took me three or four days to get back to the weight I had been, so it wasn't disastrous.

Hmmm. Hard decision.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PAULASTRAS 10/16/2010 12:12PM

    Hi Marsha,
I agree with Monty...making the right choices while you are away, forget the tracking and enjoy your time with your Mom.
You have come this far, and done so well it should be a chinch to do :)
I hope all is well with your Mom.

hugs, Paula:)

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DONNABRIGHT 10/16/2010 9:29AM

    I'm finding it really hard to keep track of things as we travel but think I am eating well.

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MONKEYSNUFFER 10/15/2010 11:10PM

    I would probably just write it down on a piece of paper. Have a great time with your mom!!!! You're lucky to have her.

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SHANTISHANTI 10/15/2010 9:16PM

    Write it down somewhere is what I say. Seeing it on paper helps me to stay within my guidelines. Enjoy your trip!!!

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JHADZHIA 10/15/2010 9:16PM

    I would say you have been on this journey long enough to know how to avoid the calorie bombs and are diligent enough to get your exercise. This is going to be stressful dealing with your mother when she is not 100%. You need to focus on this and relax about anything else. Just try and enjoy the time you spend with her.
You will be okay. I do have faith in you. You have shown us time and time again how to live a healthy lifestyle and be highly successful at it.
You are the best!

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RAYLINSTEPHENS 10/15/2010 4:56PM

    Why not just play it by ear - see if you have time and access for tracking.

If not, just do the best you can and deal with it when you get home.

Eating away from home is very difficult to track. I hope your mom is ok.

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WALKINGANNIE 10/15/2010 3:34PM

    I'm sure that you will be mindful about what you eat whatever you do.

If it takes a calorie differential of 3,500 to put on a pound, you're unlikely to do too much permanent damage given your level of vigilance and activity.

I also recognise that this might be an emotional trip so be kind to yourself.

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HAPPYSOUL91 10/15/2010 3:29PM

    Take your WW tracker and at least write down everything you eat, might help you to make better choices.

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MONTY68 10/15/2010 3:26PM

    Hi Marsha
That is a interesting decision, In my opinion, you have been here and doing well, although you may track , I think you have a pretty good idea of what you eat. It's only 5 days, I would risk it and it will be a great opportunity to see how well you manage.
Just so you know 2 years ago, I was on a 3 week vacation, ate every meal out and never tracked anything and did not gain any weight. I just watched and made the best choices I could and it was great.
I just know that you would succeed in making the right choices.

Monty emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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