Monday, March 01, 2010
Assignment for today:
1. Write a short summary about what you want to do for yourself in the March Love Yourself as You Are Now Challenge.
I'm at goal weight and I still can't say I feel really good about myself.
Weight - Sometimes I still feel fat. My stomach is pooching out or my floppy triceps continue to wave goodbye long after my hands have quit. You know what I mean. But I know I have a normal BMI. My doctor has told me that I don't need to lose more weight. Weight is not the issue. Feeling good about myself is the issue. For March, I am going to maintain my weight between 127-133 (that is moving my range down 2 pounds, but I weighed 128.8 this morning.)
Fitness - Today I'll see a Wellness Coach at the Lakeland YMCA (Cleveland Heights). I suspect that I am "skinny fat," the right weight but a high percent of body fat. If so, I should get a program to help me build muscle. I think the last 4+ months doing the SparkPeople generated strength training has helped me enough that I will be able to do at least the easiest level at the gym. Fitness Goal for March: find out body fat percentage, get program related to the findings, and do it!! I may have to see the doctor, too, because she has told me no heavy lifting, without defining what heavy is. That could postpone getting started on the program, but I'll start as soon as I can. I will continue to do at least 60 minutes of cardio 6x per week and I'll make sure I get strength training at least 2x per week for core, for upper and for lower body. Currently 10 pound weights are the heaviest I use.
Relationships - I live with a lot of criticism, and much of it I think is undeserved. I simply must be strong enough to decide what is okay, live in accordance with my own values, and discount unfair critics in my life. Goal for March: I'll write down most (or at least many) of the criticisms with my analysis. I'll look for truths in criticisms that I can benefit from, and I will negate those that are unhelpful and unfair. I will develop some positive affirmations to counteract the environment in which I live.
Appearance - I'm going to do something with my hair and try to make it look better. When I am doing lots of cardio, especially when I am doing it several times a day, it makes it difficult, but perhaps not impossible. March: new hair style.
House Order and Cleanliness - I don't feel good about the way I live. It is difficult because my husband enjoys mess, and dirt does not bother him. He regularly does very little to no housework, except for grocery shopping. After meals I often just put the food away when Natalie (3 year old) is with us and then leave the dirty dishes in order to play and have more time with her. For March: I will make my bed at least 5x per week. All dishes will be washed before I go to bed at least 6x per week.
So, for March, I'll do the Love Yourself as You Are Now Challenge daily activities. I'll maintain my weight, start a gym fitness program, get a new hair cut, make my bed, and do better at keeping the kitchen clean. I will reflect on how I feel about myself and look for opportunities to improve my relationship with myself.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
My hubby is not big on holidays. Thirty years ago, after we'd been married for one month, I gave him a "Monthiversary" present. He just laughed. He told me he does Christmas and birthdays, but no other celebrations. So, I've accepted that.
But this year on Valentine's Day I said I wanted something I hadn't had for quite some time: chocolate. Specifically, I wanted 70% cacao dark chocolate, since I'd read about its antioxidant properties. So I wanted one serving of indulgence with a redeeming quality. I said I was going to drive to the store. He said I didn't need to, that it would probably be half price the next day. Oh, I let him talk me out of it. Later I looked at Publix and at CVS and couldn't find 70% cacao. I thought I'd check out a health food store later.
Hubby went to DisneyWorld with grandkids the next week and brought me home 3 bars of 60% cacao, each with 4 - 110 calorie portions. Almost. Close. He tried. I shared with guests, thoroughly enjoyed it, and thought that was it.
Those who follow my blog know that hubby is the grocery shopper in the family. He took it over after about three months of my maintenance when he figured out I wasn't going back to shopping like I used to. He said he wasn't getting what he needs. He is diabetic and has had a heart attack. Believe me what I buy is far more what he needs. But that is a digression from this story.
Hubby then came home from Publix with 4 bags -- FOUR bags - of Nestle's Special Dark Mildly Sweetened Chocolate Nuggets with Almonds. They were buy one - get one free. He brought home 36 servings of 180 calories each. Admittedly the bag touts antioxidant properties. BUT the fine print says it is 45% cacao. Darn.
If I have a trigger food left it is chocolate. It would be so easy for me to eat a whole bag or two at one sitting. It is yummy. But I intend to resist. I could throw it away or give it away, but I'm down to my target weight (128.8 this morning) and I am going to try to handle it. Wish me luck. He truly did mean well.
Saturday, February 27, 2010
Synchronicity is kind of like coincidence, but a little more mysterious, at least I think of it that way. "Events that seem related, but are not obviously caused one by the other," is how the Encarta Dictionary explains it.
Yesterday afternoon I did something I consider important, forward looking, and inspired by my SparkFriends. It's not the kind of thing I do every day; in fact its been decades since I did it. I became a member of the YMCA with all its gym equipment, pool, and classes, and made an appointment with a Wellness Coach for Monday.
When I got home, lo and behold, there it was! A SparkGoodie from none other than my biggest inspiration, Linda RAYLINSTEPHENS. Now hold your breath: it was a gym membership!!! How did she know? Is she psychic? Probably not. Just a bit of synchronicity to Spark up our lives!
Friday, February 26, 2010
I just finished a 7 mile bike ride. The weather was chilly, but I got warmed up pretty quickly. At the beginning of February I saw a challenge on the message boards and signed up. Many of the people committed to hundreds of miles, but in good SparkPeople tradition, I started small. I committed to ride 50 miles in the month of February. I just completed it. It feels really good to meet a challenge! - Marsha
Thursday, February 25, 2010
Today I am so thankful that I can maintain a healthy weight through eating healthy food in reasonable amounts and by being active. But it wasn't always that way. I've previously shared the most dangerous things I've done to lose weight (frozen cigarette puffs) and the most uncomfortable (wearing a too tight belt to bed to rein in midnight refrig raids.) But I have yet to confess the craziest thing I ever did in search of mastery over food.
You may remember I was 31 pounds at one year of age when the doctor put me on my first diet of skim milk. My mother says from birth I acted hungry all the time, so she just fed me. When I was in my mid twenties, I came to the conclusion that my sucking needs weren't met when I was an infant. Okay, it wasn't a conclusion -- more a theory. So, to test out that theory I bought several baby bottles. I filled them with watered down skim milk, usually sweetened with artificial sweetener. Sometimes I used plain water. For a couple months I spent an hour or so in the evening sucking. (I was single and lived alone.) Needless to say, it didn't help.
At one time I thought about writing an article for The Inquirer about being hooked on baby bottles, but I never did it. In the last 35 years, thank heavens, I have had no urge to repeat the experiment.
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