Monday, October 07, 2013
The current challenge I have set for myself is to nail down and finalize a goal weight during this year, 2013. I made my initial goal weight in March of 2009 at Weight Watchers. Fifty six free monthly weigh-ins after that achievement, I'm still playing around with what is the best weight for me that I can maintain. I laugh when I think that the WW program has 6 weeks built into it to accomplish this task, and here I am, 4.66 years later still working it.
Perhaps I need a remedial goal weight setting class, BUT here I am, 4.66 years later at a healthy BMI, living life healthier and happier than I ever thought I could. So I've struggled a bit to set the goal, and I've struggled to define and live the habits that support that goal. OK. Is it really any wonder after 5 decades of living life overweight or obese that establishing that lifestyle would take some work and some time?
Right now I am testing whether 126 is a maintainable weight for me. This morning it was 126.2, very close. But silly me, yesterday I didn't weigh because I felt bloated and didn't want to see what the scale said. Why am I afraid after all these years that I will get discouraged after one bad weigh? I had eaten a few bites more than my generous post-run calorie range, that was one reason. And two days before when I had stuck to my plan completely I weighed 127 the next day, which is probably the second reason -- I figured it was worse. If I want to do an accurate weight averaging I need to weigh each day. And if I want to weigh 126, I don't have to be perfect, but pretty near. And, yes, I know weight fluctuates. But I want to fluctuate below 126 as often as I fluctuate above.
So I accept that there is a certain silliness (insanity?) to this finalizing my weight. My husband hasn't noticed any weight change in me the last 4.66 years. Nobody else cares or notices. Yet I can see and feel the difference. So I don't know yet whether 126 will be my final goal weight. But it might. And my intention is to pursue sanity on this issue after I have accomplished this challenge!
Saturday, October 05, 2013
Yesterday I was at 127.0 on the scale and had to talk to myself about not being disappointed. I'm hoping to go more than 6 days this time of weighing less than 127, but I accept that what I have direct control over is my eating. Weight fluctuates. This morning I was at 126.8, which isn't much different, but feels a whole lot better.
Enjoyed my speed work this morning, which included 10 half-mile repeats. I was disappointed, though, when I asked about the 4:40am workout on Monday morning with the two hour and 30 minute pace group leader for the Lakeland Half Marathon. The pace leader for the 2:37 group told me not to come. She thinks I need to slow down because I'm not totally healed. Oh, well. I'll enjoy my sleep. I just might make the 2:30 time on November 9th anyway. (Part of me wants to trash talk: that would show her!! But my better self just wants to run well.)
I'm not going to let minor disappointments get me down. I've come too far and accomplished too much.
Thursday, October 03, 2013
126.2 this morning, that's down .4 from yesterday after a high sodium day. I'm excited about maintaining in the 126 range. That is now 6 days. Maybe I can do this!! We'll see. Too early to really get excited about it.
Ran-walked-ran a little over 5 miles this morning in a little over one hour. Enjoyed the easy run thoroughly.
Have not yet successfully gotten back into the strength training routine. Trying to do core exercises without stressing my sore left hand - sit ups, back extensions, ab machine (without holding on) but no planks and no pull downs. Not sure if I need to go to the doctor or not, but I know I can't do push ups even modified nor any of the arm machines at the gym. All would stress my hand. Guess working the arms will just have to wait. Still have just a whisper of something not right in the left glute, too. I really do have a lot of health I'm grateful for, but I've got some limits, too. So glad I can run!!! Will try to get the exercise I need around the limitations.
Wednesday, October 02, 2013
Highlights of today:
* 126.6 today; up .6 from yesterday; good eating day yesterday, so it's a fluctuation
* wonderful team dinner this eve; great supportive company. 11 people, if I counted right
* healthy (except for too much sodium) and satisfying food tonight. I had enough calories and nutrients left to eat the whole thing, but was full after half, so brought it home (do I recognize this person?? is this me???); low sodium tomorrow!
* did my Flylady morning routine (make beds, swish and swipe bathrooms, put away clean dishes, feed fish, get dressed to shoes, etc.) and then home blessing (dust, sweep/mop, vacuum, change sheets, take out trash, straighten, etc.) today plus laundry plus washing good china and crystal; dust china cabinet; some de-cluttering. spent 5+ active hours
* printed out pictures and mailed cute ones of Gwen and older grandkids to mom
* mailed birthday card to sister with small gift and good picture I took of her 2 kids
* son-in-law called to ask me about a healthy crockpot recipe I'd made and he wanted to replicate! (I'll take a bow here.)
* tried to repair air compressor to fill my bike tires, but hubby and I decided it won't repair and we are going to buy a new one
* especially good day because I didn't sleep well last night but did good anyway
Tuesday, October 01, 2013
Background: I've lost about 86 pounds and kept it off a little over 4.5 years after more than 5 decades of being overweight or obese. Thanks to Weight Watchers, SparkPeople, Curves, the YMCA, Galloway Run-Walk-Run that showed me what to do, and a lot of failed diets over years and years that taught me what not to do, I'm living at the weight I've wanted to be since I was in junior high school!! I'm training for my second and third half marathons. I believe I could maintain even without the running, but I have come to love the running!!
OK now. I weighed 125.8 Sunday morning, 126.6 on Monday morning, and 126.0 today. I entered my weight into SP today and it now shows me as 3 pounds under goal. Even though my favorite weight is 126, I changed my goal to 129 several months ago because I was just tired of seeing my ticker showing me over goal. I found it de-motivating, so I changed it. I know this is just playing games, but it helped me for my ticker not to be telling me I was over goal. After months of trying to get to 126, with my ticker listing 129 as my goal, I made it to 126. Go figure.
For a while I had my ticker set on number of weeks of maintenance, and in my own mind I considered myself maintaining as long as I was under 135. But that felt a little too loosey-goosey. I could look at other options or even - would you believe - eliminate the ticker from my page and postings. I could, but I like that visual. Powerful snapshot of success. I deserve it.
You know, I know that when it comes to weight, I'm not totally sane. Perhaps sanity is overrated, or maybe I really shouldn't write blogs like today that demonstrate my obsession, or at least lack of balance, on this issue. I could write them and not post them, but what fun is that? I'm retired now so I'm no longer concerned that things online are going to curtail my professional options.
So, should I change my ticker goal weight back to 126? I'm thinking not yet. Being under is not a negative. Let's see if I'm going to maintain 126. Three days is not a test. And yesterday I was .6 over. I get it. Weight fluctuates. I don't like it, but I get it.
I'm laughing at myself now. Maybe really someday in the not too distant future I will find the strength to give up my scale obsession. I gave up the mindless eating. I gave up sitting most of the time. I gave up not caring about my health and appearance. But this may be the hardest one to give up yet!!
Get An Email Alert Each Time SLENDERELLA61 Posts