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SHRINKING_SARA's Recent Blog Entries

Spark seems to be working

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

I have been a little distracted lately (quite a few date nights out with Brandon) and I was worried that it would affect my weight loss... Its been slow going the last few weeks; I think like everyone else, at first the weight seems to fall off and then it sloooooooows down. I just needed a little perspective.

Today I added in my -1lb weight loss for the week, and then realized that it made it officially -30lbs since joining Spark in August. That is great. What the heck was I yelling at myself (and the scale) for? 30 lbs in 6 months is wonderful. I know I won't keep that rate up, but I just needed to stand back and be grateful for what I have accomplished. So here's to not beating myself up in 2012.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUSIEGKORN 1/17/2012 3:10PM

    Fantastic! Congrats on hitting the 30 pound mark in just 6 months. I'm proud of you!

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MLCLARKE22 1/17/2012 12:45PM

    Great job on losing 30lbs!!! your hard work and dedication are paying off! keep up the good work!!

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TREP13 1/17/2012 12:40PM

    That's awesome!!! And I'm excited that things are working out with Brandon. Keep it up girlie!

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SARAHJ19 1/17/2012 12:36PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticonCongrats on your 30 pound weight loss! That is great!! Keep it up!

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DETERMINED_SOUL 1/17/2012 12:19PM

    emoticon emoticonsometimes we think we are not doing well, but in reality we are. Just keep in mind we are our harshest critics.

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Comment on "Plus Sized" Models

Friday, January 13, 2012

Here's a great article from the DailyMail in the UK:

A magazine dedicated to plus-size fashion and models has sparked controversy with a feature claiming that most runway models meet the Body Mass Index criteria for anorexia.
Accompanied by a bold shoot that sees a nude plus-size model posing alongside a skinny 'straight-size' model, PLUS Model Magazine says it aims to encourage plus-size consumers to pressure retailers to better cater to them, and stop promoting a skinny ideal.
Size 12 (U.S.) model Katya Zharkova, 28, stars in the shoot, which has a powerful statistic accompanying each image.

Read more:

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

DETERMINED_SOUL 1/13/2012 7:11PM

    I have an issue with "Plus size models". Not with them personally, but with the title. I know it is great to inspire not so stick thin people that they can be beautiful too. My issue lies in the fact that "Plus size" is 12-16. Hello, that's normal weight for a lot of people. It depresses me to know that I could be a "Plus" size model and I have worked so hard to get into the "normal" weight range. Thank you for sharing. Sorry, I didn't mean to put a damper on that. It really is inspirational, I just wish "plus" size was really "plus" size.

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Spreading the Spark Today

Wednesday, January 11, 2012

At our weekly lab meeting, I made a comment of "oh I don't bake anymore" since another girl brought in cookies... which led to my admission of my 70lb weight loss in 8 months. Seriously, a lot of people are just too PC to say anything.

So that got two of my female coworkers to ask about what I did, and I showed them SparkPeople... so I might have to amend my comments on work colleagues if they all start to join :-P. Part of me didn't want to tell them for that reason, but the overwhelming message of the site being positive and good for everyone took over. (aka--from now on I'll reserve comments on people who might be on the site)

But in other news, I started some new strength training exercises yesterday to strengthen my back muscles. Yikes, my lower back was sore today, so I guess those muscles were pretty weak (I barely did any reps yesterday, I thought I was taking it easy).

AND then of course there was a very positive phone call with Brandon last night where I sort of admitted that I had 'got in shape recently' and I was still adjusting to a new lifestyle. Isn't that a super way to gloss over my weight loss. And since he was on his way to the YMCA when I called, it gave us another topic to talk about. I may have a keeper; our third date is coming up on Saturday...

So good mood all around. I'm stuck at work running samples on a machine in another building, so I can't go home early again today... which is why I'm all over Spark this afternoon. I quit all of the pointless Facebook games I used to play, so my free time is spent wandering around websites and Spark.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MICHELLESMILES_ 1/11/2012 4:57PM

    Good for you for spreading the Spark!

Glad your in a good mood, it sucks to be stuck at work though.

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I tend to overanalyze...

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

I tend to overanalyze things, but yesterday's blog post became relevant a lot sooner that I had expected it to. Brandon and I have only been talking since right after Christmas -- we had our first two dates last week. So honestly, I don't in theory have a problem telling him about my weight loss, but I was just kind of surprised that he wanted to talk so seriously so soon. Its probably because although we've talked about dealbreakers, and joked about what taboo topics we've talked about on our dates/phonecalls, we haven't really had any emotional conversations yet.

So last night I kinda freaked out a bit. I was overanalyzing myself and wasn't comfortable talking about some stuff, since I come from a family that avoids talking about emotions and issues. (We tend to bury bad topics once they come up = probably the reason I got into emotional eating) So I'm working on myself. I think when he calls tonight (since he probably will) I'll be more ready to talk about this, but I didn't have anything prepared yet, so I was more quiet than I normally am. The whole confident, strong woman thing went out the window...

He keeps saying he wants to take things slow, which is fine, but I guess that's only physically because he's jumping miles ahead on the emotional stuff. I really like him, so I know I need to get over my issues -- I am still just processing my emotions.

But on the Spark side of things: I knew he would probably call, so as soon as I got home, I wanted to get in my 45 minutes on the treadmill. My right knee started to twinge at bit at 40 minutes, so I'll probably cool it tonight and just focus on strength training and my exercise ball workout.

Sunday I almost worked out too much. I did 60 minutes on the treadmill, 1500+ crunches/situps in various positions, and leg lifts, and core exercise stuff. I was watching TV off my DVR so sometimes I get distracted and keep going. I almost puked I was so tired at the end. That's when you know you've done too much. I'm trying to work out how to fit in working out and 2 hour phone calls with Brandon at night. I do not work out in the morning. That's not an option, ever. I need sleep, and working out after work in front of the TV is killing two birds. So now I'm just trying to get in a workout before he calls, since I have no clue how long we're going to talk.

I'm refocusing on my diet in January. I went through a phase where I didn't really like the nutrition tracker, and thought I could do better without tracking. Nope. I wasn't eating enough, and although I didn't gain weight, I didn't lose any weight either.

So I made a conscious decision to eat more protein and focus on getting a minimum 1600 calories on days I work out (even though Spark says 1800), and never going below 1300 on days I don't work out. I went out and got some triscuits and wheat thins to add some crunch to my lunch, as well as some carbs. So far my tracker says I've only had 665 calories after breakfast and lunch, so I need to eat over 1000 calories tonight some time. That's seriously throwing me off. I went ahead and splurged at the supermarket on some Hagen Daas and mini-chocolate bars to reward myself at the end of the day -- but in moderation. But right now with 1000 calories left... I'm going to overanalyze again what to eat for dinner. I'm a huge breakfast fan, so I'll probably just do sausage and egg whites, well now, probably whole eggs with that many calories left. *sigh* Why can't dieting be easier?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RR1_RR1 1/11/2012 4:13PM

    It sounds like it going great- i dont think he will have a problem with it- your a very pretty girl from what Ive seen of the photos and seem sensible as well so he is very lucky to have found you. I tend to over analyze things too I think all of us gals do! emoticon

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DETERMINED_SOUL 1/10/2012 2:35PM

    It's so nice when relationships just happen. Often times anymore the emotional part is forgotten about.

Comment edited on: 1/10/2012 2:36:22 PM

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So when do you tell a new boyfriend that you used to be fat?

Monday, January 09, 2012

So here's my predicament. I'm online dating now, which has taken an upswing for the positive. I've been talking to and gone on two dates with this one guy, and we're really hitting it off. Except, I make him nervous. To him I'm perfect and beautiful (which is nice), but he's just not completely comfortable around me yet because he thinks I've got all of this dating experience and I'm just way above him. Which is SO FAR from the truth, its funny. Apparently now I've got all of this outward confidence, and its making him intimidated. He's a nerd, I'm a super nerd, so I wouldn't think that this would be an issue since we've had full on Doctor Who conversations, but it is.

Luckily he's not on Facebook, or he might have gone through some of my old pictures... but that brings me back to the point. How long should I wait to tell him that I didn't go on a lot of dates because I used to weigh 80lbs more than I do now?

Which brings me to another issue. This year on How I Met Your Mother, Ted refuses to go on a second date with a girl because she used to be fat. He ends up googling her after their first date, finds out her "ugly secret" and then doesn't go on a date with her again. That really kind of annoyed me. It was meant to be funny, but it hit a little too close to home.

On my coffee date this week with a different guy, I asked him what sort of women on OkCupid send him messages? His response was, "only the really weird ones, you know with kids or they're like 250 pounds." I knew from that point on, we were not going to work. Seriously, do guys not think before they say stuff like that out loud?

I think after only two dates, I'm not ready to spill the beans on my old life. I'm going to enjoy getting to know him and see if it goes anywhere. He does work with one person that I know from my undergrad days -- but she's a chick, so I doubt that she would ever judge me or tell the guy anything about the way I used to look. So for now I'm enjoying the dating scene with this one guy, and hoping it leads to somewhere great.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHRINKING_SARA 1/10/2012 12:37PM

    He called last night and he wanted to talk about more serious stuff since we've been just getting to know each other. We've only been talking for two weeks, so I honestly didn't think this would come up so soon... but it did. I skirted around the topic last night, but I think its definitely going to come up sooner rather than later with this guy.

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LIVINGKERRY 1/10/2012 10:38AM

    The past is the Past. I mean... I dont go around telling my fiance everyone I slept with... I dont think its any thing different with weight loss.

If you want to tell him, tell him, but it should not rule your life.

I dont think that you have to tell him about the weight loss if you are uncomfortable with it.. Maybe talk about eating habits and healthy living and how you recently changed your life and leave it at that.

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    If the two of you are sitting down and having serious talks, it's time. If you think he'll be more comfortable, it's time. If you feel like you are hiding the truth, it's time. It's all up to you.

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    Okay, let's face it - some guys are jerks! But, so are some girls. :) Prime example of a guy being a jerk - the coffee date guy who made the comment about the "weird ones." I think the right time to tell the "nerd" (I emoticon nerds too so I don't mean that in a bad way!!!) is when you feel comfortable doing so. Telling someone everything about you, all the details of your past, may be too much for a person to digest at first (regardless of what the past consists of). If the guy is already a little intimidated by you, telling him now may really overwhelm him. I would try to ease him into it. That way it's easier for you to say and him to take in. Like, if he continues to mention things like you being more experienced and what not, I would just start saying things like "I used to weigh a little more than I do now and I didn't really date a lot because of it." I think the key to any good relationship is honesty and being able to openly communicate, so I wouldn't go out of the way to hide it from him.

Good luck with it and enjoy yourself!!! :)

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TRAVELGRRL 1/9/2012 3:21PM

    I love all of the advice everyone gave you. I have nothing to add except YOU GO GIRL!

I saw that episode of How I Met Your Mother, and it was the LAST ONE I EVER WATCHED.

Would it have been OK to state he wouldn't go out with her again because she was black? Handicapped? Lost her hair due to cancer? What makes it acceptable in this country to keep making FAT JOKES?

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JOHNTJ1 1/9/2012 3:00PM

    Okay, I am a guy.

I don't really think it's relevant that at one point in time you had some issues with your weight. Everyone of us has had an issue one way or another in our lives with one thing or another.

I also realize that we like to make a good impression on people when we first meet them but we call the past, "the past," because it's already gone before us and really doesn't matter with with the exception that we learn from it.

I used to have a full head of hair. As you can tell from my profile picture I am bald. The fact that I once had hair doesn't really matter does it? New line

if you do feel compelled to share that you had weight issue in the past I would approach it this way, from a positive perspective. I would let the person know that you discovered some very amazing things about yourself and here's what they were:

1. You are worth every bit of the effort you put in to your health and well-being.

2. You deserve to be happy, healthy and successful. When you realize that your life began to balance.

3. You are who you hang around with. Confident, healthy, happy, and well-balanced people and around the phone another.

That's why you're art of Sparkpeople.

When this person finds all that out do you really think it's going to matter what you look like a while back? If it were me, I would have been happy simply to have met you.

Be blessed today

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RR1_RR1 1/9/2012 2:49PM

    If hes nice guy he should accept it but Id wait til you guys know each other a lot more before saying anything. My last okcupid date was the same ironically- he brought up that one girl had a really awesome profile but she was overweight so he wouldnt date her. Pretty messed up, but guys are so into appearances, its just the way the world is. I hate it too because Im not drop dead gorgeous so its hard for me to find anyone:(

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AMYSRUN4LIFE 1/9/2012 2:23PM

    I met my husband on YUP sure did! I was a single mother of 2 girls, going back to school and I weight around 230 lbs. At one point in my life I was very close to, or even over 300lbs years before we met.

My weight was NEVER an issue with him, my past weight didn't even come up until I found pictures and was like OMG look at this. If a man really has a problem with that, it's his problem not yours and you are not meant to be together. If he's smart he's going to be MORE THAN impressed with what you have accomplished when it does come up. But I don't even see why it has to be brought up. The past is just that, the past.

After we were married I gained a lot of weight between my pregnancy and the stupid depo shot. Since then I've lost 75 lbs, but he has NEVER complained or had an issue, I've always been beautiful to him. (He's like super awesome if you can't tell, lol) He has never seen me at this size, and he's TOTALLY supportive of all I've done. I got very lucky and you will to.

Don't rush anything, you'll know when you've found the right one, there are a lot of frogs in that pond, some with major warts, you will find your prince too and he'll love you for you.


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FLORENCEANN06 1/9/2012 2:15PM

    Congratulations on losing 80 pounds. That is a great achievement. Any guy you date should see that as a great accomplishment, not as a deep dark secret. As for when to tell him, I have no idea. I'm definitely not good at dating and no nothing of the dating "rules".

Hope everything works out for you.
By the way--I love your background picture.

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TREP13 1/9/2012 2:15PM

    I've lost a bit of weight since joining SP (not anywhere close to 80 pounds) and I just tell my BF (of only a couple of months) how important fitness is to me because I used to weigh more. I don't make a huge issue of it because, to me, it isn't one. I used to be fatter and now I'm not. If he is going to judge you based on that, then he isn't the right guy for you. From day one my BF has said that he wanted to be honest with me about who he is because if I'm going to fall in love with him, he wants me to fall in love with the real version of him and not what he wants me to see. I hoped that helped. :)

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