Monday, April 19, 2010
I've been pretty in control of my own will power lately. There have been lots of meals and workouts and moments of decision between water and diet soda where it wavers, of course, but I feel like I've been doing GREAT at making good decisions. AND doing it without depriving myself of anything I want to eat, drink, or do!!
I really didn't feel like working out after work on Friday. I spent the afternoon wtih my laptop open on my work desk and made a new gym playlist for my shuffle in my spare moments to help encourage me. I could have left early but I kept dawdling and procrastinating and finding little things to do... and realized it was because part of me was 'working' late enough that I could skip the gym. So I shut down those computers, packed my stuff, and headed out to my car....
But when I got to the gym my shuffle was nowhere to be seen. I was pretty sure I had it in my hand when I walked out to my car.... but I probably just forgot it on my desk. I have my swimP3 player, I could swim instead... but I'm almost POSITIVE it was in my hand...
Luckily, the gym is only two office buildings down the hill from work, so (instead of giving up my good parking spot), I walked back up to my office to find it. My legs were burning and sore from earlier workouts last week. I was genuinely tired. I was already coming up with excuses not to do the gym.... And then there it was! I could see the bundled white headphone cords from a distance. My boss and I had both left at the same time, I dropped it between our cars in those angled parking spaces... it's going to be dead. I'm gonna have to go get a new on and it's going to be one of those lame ones with the volume on the headphones and they'll probably charge a fortune for replacement ones....
WAIT! Those headphone cords look awfully white.... now that I'm closer I don't see any shards around it or anything... IT'S A MIRACLE!!!!
Somehow, it didn't get run over. I'm pretty sure that should have been impossible... but I'm certainly not complaining!! And with a sign of grace like that from the work-out gods, I HAVE to go to the gym in thanks.
And then I got in the locker room and realized I'd forgotten to pack a t-shirt. I was totally frustrated. Luckily I was wearing a cotton shirt. Not a shirt I'd normally work out in, but not really a dress shirt either. So I decided to tough it out. I knew if I went home I wouldn't come back.
And then there wasn't a single hair tie in my gym bag. Not ONE! Usually it's like a see of hair ties at the bottom of every pocket, and somehow I'd depleted the whole collection. I tried pinning it up with the 3 bobby pins in there... no luck. I tried putting it back with a cotton headband... no luck. I started on the elliptical with my hair in a cotton headband, looking silly and hair all in my way... and then it occured to me that there HAD to be at least one in my car! So I went and looked and, luckily, found one.
Even with everything trying to work against me, I got in 45 minutes and burned 750 calories!
We made my favorite dinner on Friday and I wanted seconds SO BAD!! Espescially when dear BF went back for THIRDS, but I resisted.
Saturday a friend called to hang out, and there wasn't enough time for the gym. I considered using it as an excuse not to work out... but wanted to stick to being on a roll for working out all 4 intended days every week. So I pulled up some exercise videos on demand, and small and cramped as our living room is, and silly as I feel doing them, I moved all around to different parts of the room to be able to make the moves and burned 500 calories and still had time to hop in a quick shower before my friend got there!
And then she wanted to order round table pizza. My FAVORITE, around which I have NO CONTROL at the best of times... and there had been some... herbal enhancement to the afternoon. I had a coupon for a large, so we ordered it. I looked up the nutrition facts and decided it would be fine to eat 3 pieces, since I hadn't had breakfast. Now, normally, I eat half a pizza no matter what size it is... so 3 pieces was practically a joke. So I texted dear BF right away and promised him 4 slices if he came home for his lunch break (he works saturdays)... and since the other 4 of my half were already promised to him, I didn't eat them. Even when he came home and tried to leave me one "to be nice", I MADE him eat it!
Now, yesterday got away from me a little... not bad, but it didn't have my usual planning and counting. We started the day off with nachos from a really good restaurant (which we shared) and saw Kick Ass (which was awesome!). I brought water and some sugar free dove dark chocolates, so I did well with movie snacks.... but then because the nachos were so big and good we never quite got hungry enough for a meal. So I kept just having various snacks. I think all together I was probably still in my calories together, but I didn't take it as seriously as I should have. Healthy snacks are fine, but it's silly to eat them all out of the kitchen over the course of an afternoon instead of waiting a while and then making dinner when I got hungry enough!!!
Oh well, no damage done according to the scale this morning!
Friday, April 16, 2010
The scale tried to get me down this morning!!
I'm sure that the scale and Blobby McFlabface were in cahoots this morning to try and get me to pig out on my lunch today!!
The scale showed a higher number again this morning, which is normal after I zumba, but not THAT much higher...
I had a temporary moment of panic, but had a serious think about it while I showered. I've been extra good about water recently, I usually make myself drink 8 glasses just at my desk during the day, as well as a small one right when I get up, usually at least a bottle full at the gym, and varying amounts throughout the evening... yesterday I didn't have very much water by comparison.
There was an adorable little smiling goodie bag on the table when I got home on my lunch yesterday decorated with sunshines and rainbows... I HAD to see what was inside... and one of dear BF's coworkers had given him home made cookies... my FAVORITE kind of home made cookies: oatmeal chocolate chip! I was caught unprepared and ate THREE OF THEM!! I couldn't believe it!
BUT, I had an EXTRA low calorie dinner to make up for the unknown calories of the cookies. It was a bit high on the sodium though (ling ling potstickers and trader joe's chicken fried rice), and I ended up eating pretty late 'cause I got caught up in working on the ADORABLE sock monkey crochet baby blankie and matching beanie I'm making for my best friend... crochet is like drugs to me... "just one more line and then I'll stop, I swear!"
SO, after a nice think, I didn't care WHAT the scale had to say. I did fine, I'm doing fine, it'll come right back down sometime this weekend so long as I stick to my diet and exercise guns!
Also, I've moved into the dreaded 'squishy' phase. I HATE it!! BUT, I'm just trying to keep in mind that it's a good sign of positive progress. All that super packed marbelized fat is getting smaller, so I feel squishier. Sure, I feel like I should feel firmer for all the muscle I have to be building, but thanks to last time with SP I KNOW what's happening, and while it's annoying, I can try and celebrate it as an accomplishment....
Hope you all have a fabulous and productive weekend!
Thursday, April 15, 2010
My journey is so much simpler with SP this time around. Sure, the first time I used SP I lost 20lb in like a month, and lost most of the rest of my 50lb total within the next several months... but then I got stuck. Nothing seemed to work.
Sure, this time has been painfully slow as far as the scale is concerned, but I'm recognizing all the same patterns of behavior in my body from before... so the surprises are limited, and usually good!
I saw my big drop on the scale yesterday morning, as per usual, after my rediculously hard core Tuesday night body sculpt class. And again, as per usual, a slight gain back this morning.
And here's the important part.... I was EXPECTING it. Not because I ate extra, not because I did anything 'wrong' yesterday; because it's what my body does every week. I wish I'd saved the link to the SP article someone shared on the Done team that made me feel better about it. I know from last time that my body just hangs onto a little more weight the few days after a really hard workout, but this article explained it. It's perfectly normal to see a slightly higher number on the scale for a few days after new or unusually vigorous exercise. It had all the metabolic and physiological reasons, but I have to remember enough of those for class, all I really need to remember for sanity as that it's normal, it's to be expected, and it's in no way an actual 'gain'. Now I take it as proof that I worked hard!
And, a slight miracle... I passed up SEASON FRIES last night!! I traditionally like to eat out after an evening test. I don't think of it as rewarding myself with food, I think of it as rewarding myself with not having to cook and clean! Well the dear BF had been craving a good restaurant burger, so we went to a delicious local chain. AND I didnt' get a burger. I got a chicken sandwich on sourdough with grilled onions and ortega chili's (super yum!) and asked them to go light on the cheese. I ordered sweet potato fries instead of the regular, but when we got home we had 2 orders of season fries... and I have always LOVED their season fries. And then the miracle part... I wans't into them. I LOVED the sandwich, and it was plenty big. I ate about 5 fries and then gave the whole rest of the tray to the BF!! It didn't even occur to me what I was doing at the time. They tasted geasy and starchy and unapealing. I gave away something I didn't like.... Later I realized I had lost my appetite for a 'bad' food I used to love, and as the self-proclaimed QUEEN of "i payed for it all, I'm gonna eat it all," it really is shocking behavior!!
I'm ready to waggle my rhythmically challenged booty literally off in a manner that resembles dancing!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Spark People... You win again!!
I've been resisting eating more than 1300 calories per day like you wouldn't BELIEVE, but still burning 1000 calories every Tuesday and Thursday, and a minimum of 500 every Friday and Saturday... for a grand total of 3000 calories per week.
My Dr. told me it was fine to stay in a 1200-1500 calorie range even though I upped my exercise; so I did. After all, even the biggest loser contestants only eat about 1200 calories a day, and they exercise EIGHT HOURS PER DAY, so why wouldn't it be good for me too right?
So I quickly edited my start page every time it tried to give me higher calorie ranges.
But lo and behold... WEIGHT LOSS!! I hadn't seen changes in FOREVER, then 4 days of eating within the suggested SP ranges for my activity level, and suddenly.... almost 3 lb gone!!!
So I have swallowed up my know it all attitude, and I'm enjoying swallowing a little more of my favorite healthy foods too!
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
I'm confused... but I'm certainly not complaining!!
I had a fabulous weekend. I was NOT feeling motivated to go work out on Friday. I decided to run errands on my lunch rather than pilates, and finished work early, so I was able to leave work at about 4.
I went ahead and got some new workout clothes on my lunch break while I was running errands, 'cause I couldn't stand another week of doing laundry every few days or wearing smelly, crusty work-out clothes!! I got some really cute ones on sale at Target. I even decided to brave wearing tank tops to work out in again. I always used to wear tank tops no matter what size I was 'because I hate feeling wearing more sweat against my skin than I have to... but this time around I've been shy to wear anything that didn't have sleeves.
So I went home after work to put on my favorite of my new work out clothes. (Black just below the knee pants with this cute little pink swooshy thing on the legs and a matching pink and black sports bra tank).... but was still having a hard time motivating myself! I'd worked out extra on Thursday... my toe was mysteriously hurting really bad... excuses excuses excuses!!
I made myself go. I sat and had a nice little internal discussion about how I'd feel later that evening if I went vs if I didn't go... and the go's had it!
I told myself I could just do 20 minutes and some strength training... but there was a baseball game on in the workout room and the Giants (my home team), who have sucked for as long as I can remember, are actually good this season! They were tied and in the 11th inning... so I thought I might as well stay and see if they win so I could talk about it with my dad and brother... well an hour and 15 minutes later they were in the 14th inning, and STILL tied!! I finally had to go home.
Ends up my toe is fine, I just had a bit of a gnarly spider bite poofing up. It swelled up big and gross on Saturday, but didn't hurt anymore, and was perfectly normal by Sunday. I'm glad I didn't let it stop me!
Saturday I got to see my best friend from college, who I hadn't seen in a few months. Got some exciting news from her that means lots of cute crocheting and quilt making in my near future! We even went for a nice to and around the park near my house and fed the geese.
And that led to the confusing part... I've been super good about my calories since weening myself of vacation food. Some part of me knew that I wasn't seeing any results on the scale 'cause it takes a while for all that stuff to work through my system. We had chinese on Saturday.... now, I was proud of myself. I got a meal for 1 and only ate just over 1/4 of it and saved the rest for my boyfriend. Craving satisfied and over-stuffage avoided. Then on Sunday the scale finally dropped a little. ... so I was mad at it. Never reward me for good behavior and then drop after chinese food of all things?!?! So I let Connor get a costco pizza Sunday instead of talking him into something else... and I ate A LOT of it... not all in 1 sitting like the old me, but spaced out throughout the whole day I ate HALF of that pizza!!! And then some leftovers from the fridge!! I don't know WHAT got into me... Then the scale dropped AGAIN yesterday morning... by a WHOLE POUND... after pizza and a burrito!!
So I talked to my dr. about it at my apointment yesterday. Ends up my thyroid is fine. It's under normal by about a point, but not enough to medicate or be concerned about... just enough to make things difficult!! I told her about how sticking to the 1200-1500 I'm not really seeing anything, and then getting frusrated and pigging out I see a drop... and eating out for a whole WEEK on vacation I didn't even really gain...
She suggested that I still aim for 1200-1550 most days, since I do work a desk job, but if there's something I'm really craving, or a day where I'm just extra hungry, go for it up to the top of my suggested SP range with my exercise added in... which is a WHOPPING 1950 calories!! She said not to use it as an excuse to eat 1900 calories every day, but if I want to do it once or twice a week, it's fine so long as I'm still doing those hard workouts 4 days a week.
I think that's perfect. It's like official permission to occasionally indulge when I need to, up to a responsible point, rather than just my own permisson to do so!!
So I'm confused... but I'm not complaining!!!
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