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SHIRAZSOLLY's Recent Blog Entries

Met 2 people AFTER Shvitzin' at the gym. OMG.

Monday, April 22, 2013

I admit I started bitchin' about the shvitzin' to my husband. Then, on reflection, I realized, it wasn't so bad.

We live pretty far out of town, in a skinny little valley between two mountains. So when we go to town for anything, we do all our errands all at once. In this instance, we went to the grocery store after going to the gym. I did not shower afterwards. I washed my hands and face, but that was it. A shlump dressed in shmattes.

The first person we met was someone from the only job that ever downsized me. I was not fired. I was removed to a low-level job that payed a third as much and would not pay my mortgage. It was embarrassing to meet this person. He knew, and I knew, that I was not downsized for cause, because I was very hard-working and turned out GREAT "numbers". I was simply TOO EXPENSIVE. I was an employee hired from the East coast when the company had money, which they no longer had in a rough economy. A few other more experienced, more mature and therefore more expensive folks like myself were similarly replaced by younger and less expensive newbies.

I haven't seen this person since 2008 but he recognized me immediately and came over to talk. He was very friendly and didn't seem to have any bad feelings at all. He still worked there. He still thought my treatment was unfair and claimed to mention it periodically in hopes they would take me back. Not that I would ever want to go back. Fooey on them. They were, in fact, part of the stress that was part of my weight gain.

The second person was someone from my husband's office, a professional SUIT who has only seen pictures of me looking fine. I tried to find excuses to shy away but they failed.

Afterwards, I tried to find a mirror somewhere in the store. How BAD did my hair look? I didn't used to be so obsessed with feeling so negative about myself!

And then I remembered what the first person said, the person I used to work with. Someone told him I "resurfaced" in town last week, and he had answered, "Oh, sure, and you saw Captain America, too!"

I've actually been back in town for TWO YEARS, shopping in that store and in that neighborhood and even at that former workplace, once. But no one has recognized me. I am now back to the weight I was when they hired me. Not the weight I was before my dad died and I moved across country and things got frantic. But I am at the weight these employees recognize. My body and face have both responded to the changes I've made since I've been on Sparkpeople. Yep, I am recognizeably me again.

Heh, heh. Me again. Maybe I'll stop bitchin' about shvitzin' now.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARY1313 4/25/2013 12:47AM

    Great blog~!

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PHEBESS 4/22/2013 9:05PM

    Hey, if you're schvitzy and in gym clothes, they know you're working out!!!!!!

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IFDEEVARUNS2 4/22/2013 3:14PM

    Nothing wrong with schvitzing! Keep up the good work.

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FELINEBETTER 4/22/2013 1:28PM

    You Go Girl! You got the last laugh! I'm sure your former colleague will go back and say he saw you and you're looking great!

It saddens me to hear stories like yours, but it happens more often and to more people. As you say though -- what was painful then, you now see as part of past stress!

Good for you -- you're on the right track! It was their loss for sure!

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    My dear, you don't schvitz. You glisten.


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I was so thin once it helped me spy on people...

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

I was reading a friend's blog about sleeping in a tent on top of the roof of a Corolla (eh? is that possible?) and I just remembered that there was a time when I was indeed thin enough to do ridiculous things. At my lowest, I was 109 pounds (and looked horrible, I hasten to add, but I didn't know it at the time).

I went through a period when I wanted to be a spy. I was actually surrounded by people who I could have spied upon, but I was too naive to know who they were. I actually was FRIENDS with the daughter of a dictator who was being kept in a safe house by the US government. But she never told me who her father was and I never saw him because he didn't live with her. She was interesting. She had a horse. I had friends from multiple foreign countries, some of whom weren't even legal. I never thought to spy on them.

Instead, I chose to spy on a coffee shop that was owned by the family of my "boyfriend". (I was a freshman in high school.) I nonchalantly walked past security at the mall - and this was a VERY LARGE swanky mall near Washington, D.C. I won't say which one, but I will say again it was VERY LARGE. I let myself into the boiler room. I pulled the cover off the duct and crawled in. I pulled it back over me. Then I crawled through the system, which was noisy, blowy, and probably didn't deliver good air conditioning for at least half an hour because there was a 109 pound obstruction in it.

I sort of knew where I was going because I had studied the mall map. Security was a floor below the coffee shop. I don't remember how many stores I had to pass before I got to the coffee shop, but I know it was a long way. Fifteen? And some had multiple vents because they were large stores. I counted vents. I started coming up to listen when I thought I might be getting close. After awhile, I knew I had the right store, but there really wasn't much to hear. I mean, it was a coffee shop. A customer, the cash register. Silence. Foot steps. Some humming, That sort of thing. No boy friend's voice. No talking about me or anyone else interesting. But I hadn't really expected that. I didn't think they were going to. I just wanted experience as a spy. Next time I was going to hide behind a stairwell and listen in on the parole officer.

I crawled backwards down the vent and let myself back out. I smoothed my hair back down but my clothes were very dirty and rumply. Somehow a very dissheveled me passed by security again without any questioning. And out of the mall I went.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARY1313 4/18/2013 5:28PM

    hahahaha!!!! I weighed that too and I looked like a refugee! I don't like all the weight I've gained, but I don't want to be a skinny mini anymore either! Thanks for the laugh!!


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THINAGIN2 4/17/2013 6:42PM

    Thanks for sharing this amusing story!

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FELINEBETTER 4/17/2013 3:18PM

    What a bizarre experience! Good thing you were thin or you might have had a crash landing! lol Anything but subtle! Funny, some of the ideas that cross your mind -- especially when you're young... and THIN! lol emoticon

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    Oh, my gosh, that is too funny... emoticon

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Solly and I learn Zumba

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Other than doing "the bump" at the 6th grade dance with my friend Michele, and participating in the obligitory chair and circle "dances" at my wedding 2 years ago, have never danced in public. I won't even wiggle my hips if my husband is watching because I feel THAT uncoordinated and stupid.

I'm almost 48. This is kind of silly, don't you think? I've thought so for awhile. I've been on a gradual Larisa makeover for about 10 years now. I even took group voice lessons a year ago because I love to sing but never did in public and I go to a very music-oriented shul. I was shocked to find this group voice class included solos, but I got through them, trembling. I also took a speech class - a MAJOR undertaking for someone who always considered herself a stutterer and bumbler - and I got through that, trembling, too. Actually - I should pat myself on the back here. I got A+ in both classes. Both teachers recognized the extraordinary work I put in to surmount my nerves.

There are Zumba classes at the Y. I love music and would love to be one of those women who looks like she is having a wonderful time, translating that rhythm into every inch of her body. Zumba incorporates Reggae, Funk and Latin rhythms, so it uses a lot of rhythmic rocking and fluid motions that I'm too arthritic to manage well. Plus, I'm just plain uncoordinated. I literally bump into my own walls and counters and fall down my own stairs. I have bruises all over. But I WANT to try this. I WANT to try to be one of those women.

So before I make a fool out of myself, I am practicing at home. I found a free tutorial online and tried it out in my kitchen today before I went to a client's to deliver some home made gumbo and corn bread. (He thinks I'm being nice. I think he needs the calories more than I do.) Here's the link:

There are a whole bunch of videos besides this one, so if you are more coordinated than I, you can just keep on going. Or you can back up and do it again like I did.

The cracking noises my shoulders made during the high reaching movements apparently bothered Solly. He kept jumping up and down and barking. As soon as I stopped reaching, he stopped barking. I took his hint and reached at a 30 degree angle and he didn't bark again. Besides, it felt better.

By the second time through the video, I still felt uncoordinated, but I was laughing about it. It's ok. I know what I can do and can't do. If I reach half way and do singles where she says doubles, that's fine for now, as long as I'm moving approximately in the right direction with approximately the right rhythm and approximately the right dance step. Especially since every 16 seconds or so Solly was interrupting to have me throw him his ball.

My dance moves went like this... single step and reach, single step and reach... Solly throw and reverse... single step and reach, single step and reach... Solly throw and reverse...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARY1313 4/18/2013 5:31PM

    Good for you stepping out of your comfort zone to "grow" your abilities!


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EFFIEANNIE 4/17/2013 8:26AM

    Oh, I am another one like you. Sing for softly in church cause I know I am off key and am very unco-ordinated. I will try the link- thanks for posting it. I would love to do Zumba. Have a good time!

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SHIRAZSOLLY 4/16/2013 8:00PM

    I just read Sylph's old blog about learning to feel good about singing in public. I also agree that it is NOT FUNNY or cute to tell someone not to quit their day job when you hear them singing or see them dancing. I have - as have other people I know - been paralyzed by feelings of inadequacy since childhood over things that I should not have been afraid to do in public. It is absolutely my fault that it has taken me so long to let go of this fear. But to all those people who tell children that they dance, sing or talk funny... go look in the mirror. Do you really want to be the person this child remembers as being the one who scared them away from singing, dancing or speaking in public?

Comment edited on: 4/16/2013 8:02:09 PM

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FELINEBETTER 4/16/2013 7:56PM

    Way to go, Girl! You & Solly have even added a new move (stretch & throw!)! I will take a look at this myself. Music is so good for the soul -- and why not try something new!

emoticon emoticon emoticon

And btw -- kudos also for overcoming public singing and speaking! Those are big ones!

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    I watched just the first couple of minutes of the video and heard the most important thing: "There is no wrong way and no right way." As Phebe's signature line says, "Dance as though no one is watching." I'm proud of you for starting Zumba. Any bruises you incur at the beginning are badges of honor. You have nothing at stake, so let yourself relax and have fun. The movement alone will feel so good and free.
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You and Zumba remind me of a blog I wrote here a long time ago about singing. If you take a few minutes to read it, I think you'll see a parallel between our mindsets.


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Jokes About Dieting

Monday, April 15, 2013

“No diet will remove all the fat from your body because the brain is entirely fat. Without a brain, you might look good, but all you could do is run for public office.” — George Bernard Shaw

(Shaw was exaggerating. But our brains are 75% saturated fat. And trans fat does not work as an acceptable substitute.)

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in 14 days I had lost exactly two weeks.
- Joe E. Lewis

from The Dawn Key Diet:

You know it's time to diet when... you dance and you make the band skip.

“The only time to eat diet food is while you’re waiting for the steak to cook.”–Julia Child


Q: Is swimming good for your figure?
A: If swimming is good for your figure, explain whales to me.

For those of you who watch what you eat, here’s the final word on nutrition and health. It’s a relief to know the truth after all those conflicting nutritional studies.
1. The Japanese eat very little fat
and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
2.. The Mexicans eat a lot of fat
and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
3. The Chinese drink very little red wine
and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.
4. The Italians drink a lot of red wine
and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans..
5. The Germans drink a lot of beers and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than Americans.

Eat and drink what you like.

Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MARYGOLD5 4/15/2013 9:01PM

    emoticon emoticon

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MARY1313 4/15/2013 7:17PM

    Love them!!!

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FELINEBETTER 4/15/2013 11:36AM

    Lol Way to start Monday off with a few laughs! emoticon

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KNYAGENYA 4/15/2013 11:27AM


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Curious measurement change... but I'll take it!

Friday, April 12, 2013

I have been avoiding measuring myself. I've lost only 7 lbs. and my reflection looks the same in the bathroom mirror. Two or three pairs of my pants fit the same, but I am also able to wear several pair I could not a couple months ago without embarrassment.

I'm one of those people who considers many, many shades of gray rather than just black and white. It will be a good trait for me to have as a healthcare provider, because I won't just guess what's wrong, scribble prescriptions and rush you out the door. It's problematic when I'm thinking about ME because I ruminate so long on the diagnosis I'm overwhelmed by the time I start thinking about the cure! So instead of just getting out the measuring tape, I've been berating myself for all those times I could have squeezed in a few more steps, bypassed peanut cookies and not tasted the dinner seventeen times just to make sure it was really yummy. (Did I mention I used to cook professionally? So we eat Greek one night, French the next, Japanese the night after that... I find it very hard to not overeat. The LEAST I could do is not snack on peanut cookies!)

Finally today, 2 months after starting Spark, I measured myself, expecting to see little or no improvement. My waist is one inch smaller. Individually, my thighs measure the same as they did in February. HOWEVER, I've lost 4 inches off my hips! I took the measurement low, at the saddlebag area, which aren't technically hips, but are my widest spot. And that's apparently where I've lost it. Can't see too low in the bathroom mirror, so I wasn't getting that reinforcement when I looked in the mirror. Also, the "relaxed fit" pants I've gotten in the habit of buying weren't telling me I'd made any progress.

I guess I've done better than I thought!

Now what would my thighs be like if I had really bypassed those peanut cookies...?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHIRAZSOLLY 4/15/2013 2:00AM

    I just got lab test results back - and have some skewed kidney readings. That 4 inches was probably NOT 4 inches of fat. Probably one inch of fat plus water. Sometimes my ankles swell, too. No surprise. Kidney disease runs in the family. So before anyone thinks I discovered some miracle exercise or got lucky or something... or lied... or before I lose any more time wondering how bonkers I could have been not noticing 4 inches of fat gone...

I probably only lost an inch of fat off my saddlebags, like the inch off my waist. I do feel a little firmer in both places. A realistic inch decrease in the saddlebags is still better than an inch or two increase.

Comment edited on: 4/15/2013 11:27:07 AM

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PHEBESS 4/12/2013 8:12PM

    Eventually, you'll arrive at the day when those pants are so saggy and baggy that they fall off. Literally. Fall down.

It's a wonderful day when that happens!

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    Take those seven pounds and those inches and run, never looking back. All the pieces will fall into place. Your main concern is what you put in and how you work it out.

Now that I'm working to reverse my hideous weight gain of the past two years, I look forward to my underwear no longer hurting.

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