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Monday, April 26, 2010

I started Spark on the wrong week, unfortunately. I knew it would be hard, because I knew I'd be hungry all the time.

Tonight I did so well, too - dinner was reasonable, I was fine on everything, and I had a bunch of cantaloupe chunks and some grapes...and then, something snapped, and, bada-bing...binge. Guh.

Hate, hate, hate. I knew it would happen at some point, but this hit so hard.

I feel like I look like a Macy's balloon - feel so bloated. : (

I will know better for next time, for sure...but man, that SUCKED. I thought drinking all of this water would help take the edge off, but apparently, my body didn't want to settle tonight. : /

Needy friend called and left me a voice mail. I have not returned the call...


What a few past days it's been...

Saturday, April 24, 2010

...sorry if that makes no sense, I'm very tired. : P

The past few days had been filled with work, chaos from a toxic friend, and dance show. Work was fine - we had a pizza and a movie day for the kids (I watch school-agers) - and that was fun.

My toxic friend was being...well, I cut some ties, not all of them. Yet. She needs to learn to open her mind, and her ears, and LISTEN. And find the support and help she needs from people who can actually help her. I told her I cannot have her in my life right now because I was being used as an outlet instead of being treated like a friend. Which sucks, because when she came back into my life, I was so, so, I don't think we'll ver *really* be friends again.

DANCE SHOW! It was fantastic! So much good energy, so many awesome belly dancers! It was so much fun, and it was filled with the positivity I needed at this point in time.

That's what's been happening...if you're following along, I hope you've been well, too. : )

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHIMMYSHAKER 4/25/2010 2:59PM

    Glad that it helped! :)

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DIANE7786 4/25/2010 1:17PM

    You make perfect sense to me, tired or not. My friend of over 30 years has been toxic for the past few years. I hate to cut most ties because I always thought we’d be lifelong friends. Occasionally I see a glimmer of her old self that quickly disappears. I like your line, “…cannot have her in my life right now because I was being used as an outlet instead of being treated like a friend.” I’m not an outlet either. Thanks for helping me clarify my thoughts.

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Here we go...

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

A friend poked at me a couple of times about looking into this, and the second time I caved. I had weighed myself the day before, and I was at 195.5 pouds - I NEVER thought I'd see the day! It thought it was time to change something, and time to change it now.

A little background - I'm 25, and I'm artsy-fartsy. I've been belly dancing for a little over a year. I work in a daycare, and I walk to and from work almost every day...with a few exceptions.

I'm hoping to make changes for the better, so we'll see where this takes me. One of my fast break goals was to stretch for 10 minutes. I feel better for even having done that. :)

Doctor's appointment tomorrow, I think my allergies are acting up super-bad. Either that, it's my weight affecting my body. I guess we'll see.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MSKOCY360 4/21/2010 1:54PM

  I wanna say welcome to SP! Good luck on your fitness journey. If you need motivation, I'm always up for a buddy. I'm 21 and far far far too overweight for my own good, so just know you aren't alone on your quest.

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GOLFCHICK2-0 4/21/2010 1:48PM

    There are also several Belly Dancing groups on SparkPeople. More support by people who "get" who you are and what you do is always helpful!!
Welcome and Spark On! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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SHIMMYSHAKER 4/21/2010 1:42PM

    Thanks for the vote of confidence! :)

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SVIET10 4/21/2010 1:39PM

    Welcome to SP! This is an awesome site. Start with tracking your food every day and join some of the groups in the community. You can even search your interests!

I work in child care too - Program Manager for a community college. Those little ones keep us running! That counts for some exercise, but also check out the many things on this site - the fitness area is awesome and you can do it in your own home (no gym memberships)!

The best thing, (besides this site being free) is all the friends you will make and all the support you will get. Once you learn how to manuver thru the site, join a challenge or two and really start to lose! Good luck! emoticon

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CALDEROB 4/21/2010 1:38PM

    Hope you do well...looks to me like you just need good eating habits...from your blog you seem very active...I started at 190 and I was like woooooo that's so close to 200...that kicked my fanny right into gear...then I found sparkpeople and loving every minute of it...I'm down to 174...if I can do it you can too.

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