Monday, December 09, 2013
Off since spring, attacking with a vengeance in December.
Winter is here, and I don't enjoy the fact that my jeans aren't as loose as they had been.
I thought for sure that I'd be fine (again...likely story, lady) if I paid attention to the food that went into my mouth, and my activity level.
TO MY CREDIT...even though I felt a bit laggy over summer (I headed up summer camp 2013, and had many good reports over the guy who did it the last two years), I DID remain active. Even if it wasn't every day, every week, I still did Bellyfit, or I still hit the elliptical, still walked my dog.
I got so tired of tracking everything, guys. That's been my white whale. So, so tired of tracking everything.
But, I'm back, because tracking helps me with my food.
I'm active enough, that's just ducky; I have to work on my dependence on sweets and junk in general again. (I usually don't put a lot of salt into/onto my food, and I have a soda or frozen-Coke-type-thing MAYBE once a month. I have, in the meantime, been enjoying the miracle that is Faygo and Meijer no-sweetener, flavored sparkling water - I love cherry, and grapefruit!)
Of course, a lot has happened since April/May (I miss CHICCHANTAL's blogs!), and I'll have to play catch-up when it's not 2AM. It's nice to be back, after a fashion, though. Perhaps the third time is the charm?
I hope that you're all well!!!
Tuesday, April 09, 2013
I ampretty sure I missed the 1-year anniversary of my lifestyle change.
February 15th, 2012, I weighed in at 186.6 lbs.
February 15th, 2013- I am sure I was hovering between 154 - 156 lbs (it fluctuates).
I am still pleased, even if I haven't reached my personal goal of 150 lbs.
Here's a little something I typed up.
Noted differences in a year:
- Of course, the weight. In 2010/11, I was hovering around 195 lbs. In 2012, I was 186lbs.
Now, in 2013, I am hovering around the 155 lb. mark. I am okay with that. I don't know if I can/should push for 150, or even 140. I don't remember what it was like to be 140 – I was much younger – but I know that 150 is comfortable, because that's where much of my young adult life was spent.
Lately, the weight has been fluctuating a lot, because I can't seem to stop being bloated. Ugh.
- FOOD! There has been a huge change in my food. I am WAY more conscious about what I put into my mouth/body. I don't sit and mow down on a large bag of Doritos. I don't overdo fattening condiments. I will double up on my veggies if I can. I use actual butter for topping instead of margarine, and I bake with canola oil, if not applesauce or pumpkin. I've also taken to egg whites as a lean protein and egg substitute.
I am, however, only human, and I will still eat junk. I still love chips and chocolate and the like, but now I * try * not to eat so much of it in a single serving.
- ACTIVITY! I've definitely been more active in this last year, which has been amazing. I had my schedule before dad's shoulder injury made him leave work. I'd get up earlier (for me), stretch, dance, eat a healthy breakfast, walk my dog, walk to run errands, walk to work, chase the work kids, take one of two dance classes...it was awesome. I'd dance while I washed dishes sometimes.
AFTER dad's injury, though, it felt harder to keep the good stuff going. I like my privacy, I've always been a pretty self-conscious person (says the person who has been belly dancing for 6 years – if you can believe it!). I can perform on stage, but I just can't do things n front of my family. I don't know why. :-/
But, because of this...I will stay in late to use the dance room at work if it's empty, and over the summer, I started using the recumbent bike, and discovered my love of the elliptical trainer. I would sometimes go to work before my shift to work out. Now, it's mostly after work – I like my time in the morning/afternoon before my shift – and I will use the elliptical or dance, and then stretch out.
Energy still runs low, especially one (or even two) particular week(s) out of the month. Sometimes, it is hard to run with the kids at work. But you have to keep going.
- ASTHMA! I've been an asthmatic all of my life. I've also had nasty allergies. Unfortunately, I don't think my allergies have gotten better, but thanks to lifestyle change, my asthma has. I used to use it between 2 – 4 times a day, and I'd always use it before any kind of physical activity. Recently, though...I hopped onto the elliptical to push at least 15 minutes (I think I only did 13, at 1.50 miles)...and I forgot to use my inhaler first! And I felt fine!
I'll still use my inhaler from time to time...but at least it's getting better...!
...and a little something to remember.
Monday, April 08, 2013
Man, I had myself all psyched up and everything - I was writing out those "favorite things" blogs, I was hitting the elliptical every day, was being mindful, etc...and then I just stopped.
Stopped wrting and posting blogs.
Stopped checking my SparkMail (that'll come back to bite me, I'm sure - lots to sort out).
And stopped logging in for points.
Ultimately, life happened; monthly visitor, Passover, seasonal goodies,needing to prep for our troupe's belly dance show this month, work schedule.
Aside from far too many Cadbury eggs, I've remained pretty mindful (and I've still been dancingand using the elliptical). Unfortunately, I've also been pretty bloated (too much salt?), so I don't know whether the scale is telling me the truth or not (and weighing myself first thing in the morning is NOT an option; I do not own a scale, and I will not go to work to weigh myself before my day can begin).
BUT, here I am, again.
I'll be re-weighing myself at some point, and maybe starting a new goal. I feel like I've been maintaining forever, which is okay, 30 lbs. is a pretty amazing loss and I'm pretty content wth thinking that I may *never* lose the extra 5 lbs.
But I am here, I am around, I am alive. I'm mostly on Facebook.
Hope you're all well!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
I know you feel gross right now. You feel unhealthy, off, icky. The weather changed dramatically, you're facing changes at work, and general confusion.
In the midst, you're feeling chubby, bloated, and not like you've lost 33 lbs.
Wearing leggings and a pair of sweats to combat the 5°F weather isn't helping, for sure.
BUT...remember...the last three pairs of pants you've bought? All size 12s, and they are big enough to accomodate even wearing sweatpants underneath them.
You'll be okay. All is not lost. You feel icky, but you haven't re-gained 33 lbs. overnight.
Just do what you can, and be gentle with yourself.
Thursday, January 17, 2013
There's been so much ridiculousness in the world lately. Have you seen the news? So much negativity. And it's played in my house. And it makes my father rage. And I have a short fuse after too much of him yelling at the TV.
There's been tough changes at work, too. Not a lot of us are very pleased with the changes.
I had a meltdown last night.
I cried the hardest I've cried in quite awhile. I felt lightheaded, sick, and cold...I couldn't catch my breath. I felt so lost, I didn't know what to do. I wanted to hide, to go away, but knew that there was no point...nothing would be changed when I'd eventually come back.
I had an amazing support system, though. I did. I have amazing loves in my life, and I'm so thankful they were there. A couple of them didn't even know that they were lifting my spirits when they wrote to me, they didn't know what was going on. My boyfriend tried to reason with me logically (kudos to him, although I question him trying to do so with a sobbing, hormonal mess of a woman at the time!)...and he reminded me of what I had learned at the de-stressing training I'd attended. You need to focus on you. I still feel like I need to save the world, and when I can't, I feel totally lost, powerless, weak.
He reminded me to smile, even n the face of all of this.
So, this morning, I was gentle with myself.
I made my customary green tea, and I made some old-fashioned oats with unsweetened applesauce, banana, and strawberries. I did 30 (30!!!!) minutes of stretching out with some yoga music, and my peppermint candle on the warmer. I made an egg white omelette with swiss cheese, quinoa, and broccoli, and am thoroughly enjoying it.
I'm taking care of me, even though the world outside of mine is still a question mark...work is a question mark (what will it be like today? will I make it?), politics are a VERY big question mark...how my parents will be feeling when I see them tonight will be a question mark...
But I need to remember that it is absolutely more than okay to take care of your own little corner of the world, of yourself, so that that, too, does not fall into disrepair.
I decided to type this up and share this because we ALL need to remember to TAKE CARE and BE GENTLE with ourselves! It can be so, so, so very, very hard to remember, and, if you're like me, sometimes you feel guilty and selfish for even thinking about it...please, make yourself that cup of tea. Warm up your favorite candle. Cuddle with your pets. Hug a friend. Paint. Read that book you've been meaning to get to.
Just...take care, everyone. Take care, and love...moreover, remember to love yourself...so that the love may spread to others, too. Do your best. No one can ask for more than that. And don't beat yourself up if you fall short. There's no shame in an honest attempt.
My dad did apologize before he and my mom left for appointments today. I didn't want to tell him that I melted down last night, but he mentioned that I looked like I was "feeling blah".
It's so hard when tensions are so high everywhere...I'll probably have to come back and re-read this more than once for myself.
Take care, everyone. Enjoy your afternoon, your day...even if you have to reaaaally stretch for that one positive thing...it's still a positive thing you can build on.
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