SHELLE13   37,093
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SHELLE13's Recent Blog Entries


Monday, October 24, 2011

At this very moment, I am at a cross road. I have a few decisions to make and my nerves have been on edge all weekend! One good thing, I didn't use food to soothe my anxiety. That was a huge change for me!

I met with a possible roommate yesterday. She is 26, very young...I am 33. I have never had a roommate before and it will be strange going from a nice one bedroom apartment with a W/D in unit to share a 2 bedroom condo, tandem parking and paying for laundry again. The area is in the same neighborhood I am in now, the condo is just okay...the kitchen is super small, but maybe that is a good thing! The price is right, as it is about 1200 less than I am paying monthly right now. (I know!). My current apt is nice, but it is just too much money, especially since I want to change my career and do something I like, which means a huge pay cut!

I did find another condo for rent, 1b/1ba and it is nice inside. Cable and utilities paid, no W/D, but it is about $500 more than the roommate situation and the area is a little shotty, even though its in a gated community. I just don't know what to do...I really think I am going to look at a few more places, but I have to give this girl an answer by the end of the week, as I said I would.

I think the roommate situation is better financially, but I feel kinda like I am taking a few steps back doing this. It's a blow to my ego and pride.

But really Kristi? It's better than waking up every morning to a nice apartment but a job you dread every single morning, isn't it?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    I can follow the wanting to change your job, and even wanting to go cheaper to do that, but just a piece of advice from me, if you live with someone, it can be really hard especially when you are so used to living by yourself. It is one of the toughest things to do, honestly. Maybe the option where you still living alone and still save $700? Or maybe another better option will show itself.


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DETERMINEDJANET 10/24/2011 11:18PM

    I can understand how you feel, but you know it is necessary to move in the direction you want to be happy with your career at this time. All things have a season...this may be more temporary than even you can imagine. Keep pushing for your dreams!

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TREP13 10/24/2011 1:28PM

    You never know, having a roommate could be a good thing for you. It's something you have to experience. This could open up your social circle or help you change some bad habits. Give it a try!

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The Fabulousness of Repeat WW'ers!

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

I have been on the boards, on the blogs, around the community pages, etc. this morning.

Now, some may associate with this, some may not...But does this sound familiar? We are OP feeling good, we do well, we find success, something happens and we stop going but figure we know what to do so we will be okay, something else happens or we gain weight and we realize that we need to go back to meetings, we feel a little embarrassed or ashamed that we had gained weight, but we go back anyways, we are back in our groove, feeling good in our meetings, waiting for our success, we have success and then we repeat the whole thing all over again.

What I am noticing is a definite pattern. A pattern only a repeat WW'er would know, recognize and identify with. It is NOT the above is our resilience and our ability to get right back up after falling down. It is our desire to not give up, to keep fighting for the life and body we want. It is the determination that "This time will be different."

We repeat WW'ers are very strong individuals. In no other program do you see this kind of resiliency or loyalty to a program. You don't see this type of dedication or determination that keeps coming back, even after a setback. In no other program, and believe me I have pretty much done them all, have I seen or experienced this. That is what makes WW different. That is what makes WW a program we can live with. That is what makes WW a "lifestyle" program.

It is not just counting points and measuring food. It's how we interact with one another, how we support one another and how we encourage one another. We do this because we have all been there, no matter where you are in your journey. Repeat WW'ers are some of the most amazing people in this world and I am glad I can be a part of that group. Weight loss is not easy. It is a mental challenge, but having the help of all of you out there makes my journey seem a little less daunting.

Thank you!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BLVINBUTTERFLYS 10/22/2011 11:51AM

    You can do it!


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JONICACALDWELL 10/19/2011 5:41PM

    We know WW works. The program encourages a balanced diet and lets you eat more the more you workout. Thanks for the post.

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SABRINALONDON21 10/19/2011 4:04PM

    Changing your lifestyle is hard, but being fat is hard as well...The quicker we accept this the quicker we can decide which hard we want to chose!

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KLONG8 10/19/2011 3:12PM

    This weight loss (and healthy living) effort is never ending. Of course, we'd all like to take off the weight and the job would be DONE! But as you point out, that's not the case. But the cool thing is that you know just what to do, you don't panic, your resolve is NOT just refocus and head back to WW. Good for you! And much success to you too!

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Denied by a major healthcare provider because of my BMI...

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

It was a rough weekend. Yesterday was good and I went to the gym for an hour long Zumba class. My eating was within my points and I got my water in. This morning, I received my decision letter from the health company that begins with "K" (will refer to as K for the rest of this post) for health coverage. I currently have another healthcare provider and they deny everything and pay for nothing. K declined me because my BMI is too high and an abnormal pap. Although, nothing ever became of the latter, but it was in my history.

I am super frustrated....

Over this past weekend, I did not go out but made myself face a lot of the emotions I have been eating to get away from. I realized that a lot of my unhappiness stems from two things, my weight and my job. What I also realized is that I can change all of that. Recession or not. Fat or not. I can get a smaller apartment and possibly a roomate and cut my rent in half. This will help to prepare me for a major pay cut, which is what I will incur when I change industries. I hadn't planned on not having health insurance, although I went for years without it. How is it any different now?

It's very frustrating that an insurance company considers an overweight person as having a "pre-existing" condition and therefore be too much of a risk that you can't even take their money?! The crazy thing is, I am probably more healthy than the skinny people with a proper BMI. I am not on any medications related to weight, yet I am the risk. I don't smoke, yet they will take a skinny smoker. Its ridiculous...Aren't they (K) the ones that are always running eat healthy and lose weight ads? Beyond that, the K employee that helped me had a picture of himself on his K micro-site and he is also very overweight. Funny because he works for the company, yet they automatically accept him. But me, I am denied when I am paying out of pocket. It makes absolutely no sense.

Maybe this is the thing that I needed to happen to get so pi**ed off that I make myself healthier and happier...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SHELLE13 10/19/2011 12:27PM

    Jerseyflower...yes! That's what it said. Height/weight ratio blah, blah, blah BMI. Yes, big blow...but I am going to lose this weight and NEVER get K insurance, even when I am skinny!

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JERSEYFLOWER 10/18/2011 9:09PM

    I got the same letter from a different company, company "A"! Blogged about it in February, I think. Mortifying, isn't it? It said declined due to "height/weight ratio" and "anxiety, note but not pursue" whatever the heck that means. Yes, I was successfully treated for anxiety. Keep on keeping on, my friend. This does not define you. They are stupid.

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SHELLE13 10/18/2011 3:04PM

    Thank you all. Yes, was applying for an individual plan because my employer doesn't provide insurance. I was trying to apply for K because my current insurance isn't paying for anything and it's costing me so much money just for regular things like prescriptions (birth control and sinus medicine), to the tune of about $200 a month, not including my monthly premiums which are $224 a month and they are raising it in December. Just frustrating...maybe it's a better value to have catastrophic insurance and go to Planned Parenthood for my Well Women exams. I dunno...I hate being poor, considering I work a lot. It makes no sense...

Comment edited on: 10/18/2011 3:04:40 PM

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LENKA763 10/18/2011 1:46PM

    yeah, I would be flustrated too.
They alway want your money , but never want to pay when the should.
I hope you will be able to get some decent coverage soon.
don't give up!

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CRYSTLE4HIMTX10 10/18/2011 11:56AM

    err that is frustrating. Hope you are able to find some insurance. emoticon

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CAPECODLIGHT 10/18/2011 11:43AM

    I assume you were applying for an individual health policy. I haven't heard of someone being denied on a group insurance plan (I'm sure the overweight employee that handled your app is covered under K's group plan). Insurance companies are very cautious on accepting people on individual health policies because of adverse selection.
Maybe you can get a catastrophic health policy. When I was between jobs, that is what I purchased. The premium was cheap. It has a high deductible, as it is only meant for serious health issues, e.g., hospitalizations, rather than day-to-day office visits and such.

Did you ask what your BMI would have to be to be accepted? That could be your first big goal on this healthier lifestyle journey. Good luck!

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Thursday, October 13, 2011

Not sure whats going on with my body. I am wondering if my weight loss last week was a fluke. I am back up to where I was the week before last, but haven't gone crazy. I am still within my points, but last week was emotional. Maybe that cause my weight loss?

I am a little worried about getting on the scale on Saturday. I don't want it to be a gain. I know my TOM is coming up and that could be part of it. But, I am going to make these two days great days!

On another note, I am wondering if weighing in each day helps or hinders me. I am scared to get rid of the scale. I was supposed to, but couldn't part with it!

Just thinking out loud...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:


    Could be TOM or emotions. They often say on Loser that the stress causes issues with the scale.

I don't weigh every day as it stresses me out and it ebbs and flows. I just stick to my team challenge weigh-in days (Thurs/Sat).

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CRYSTLE4HIMTX10 10/13/2011 12:48PM

    Hang in there. I bet after TOM the pounds come right back off. emoticon

I know others say don't but I weigh every day. You have to do what works for you and if it discourages you or causes you to backtrack I say put them away.

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"Donít quit, COMMIT. Being healthy and fit is a choice you make every single day"

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

This morning, I open up Facebook and read a few stories...I get down to the Men's Health Magazine Quote of the Day. The quote is "Donít quit, COMMIT. Being healthy and fit is a choice you make every single day."

It is a great quote and I am glad that I "liked" Men's Health Magazine (for whatever reason). I have been thinking about this for the last hour or so...I think somehow in my head, health and fitness didn't tie into an EVERY SINGLE DAY thing for me. Maybe it's because we always hear to exercise 3-5x a week, not every day. Maybe it's because I have gotten in the bad habit of allowing weekends to be less disciplined than weekdays, so it's not every day. Maybe it's because I don't have something majorly wrong with my body that I see every day. Well, other than the fact that I am super fluffy compared to others. However, I don't know myself thin as I have never been thin. So what I see in the mirror is my so called "normal."

I think this quote has been very impactful to me. Not only because it is stated as something you do every day. But, it is also stated as a CHOICE. I can choose to be healthy or I can choose to be a tubba wubba. (Thank you WW boards for that lovely description! Tubba wubba). But it's true. It's my choice. The ironic thing is, if I keep choosing to be a tubba wubba, I won't get to have a choice anymore because health consequences will arise and I won't be in such a privy position.

Very strange. A lot of weight loss is about perception and all of it is controlled by your brain, not the body and not by food. Weight loss is all mind and never about willpower or weakness in the face of food. The latter is often what we tell ourselves. I know, I have been there.

It's time for a change and a new perception.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

GOCELTICSGO 10/11/2011 10:47AM

    positive spirits!!!!!

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