Wednesday, June 10, 2009
I am within my calorie range right now, in fact I have about 50 calories to spare. I may have a sugarfree cocoa made with hot water later tonight. I am going to start my homework right now and do all I can to stay away from the kitchen! I did the dishes already, maybe I should turn off the light so it looks as though it's "closed" for the day.
I am still really sore and am giving my body a rest today from exercise. If I start to wander to the kitchen, I will make myself come back to sparkpeople.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
So, last night...the same thing happened. Again, I really think if I am in front of the TV, it is a very strong learned habit to start eating something. I didn't even have dinner, I had snacky things.
So, that means that I have to have a new plan for tonight. I will not turn the TV on at all! I am so behind in homework anyways, it will be good for me. I am stopping at 1300 calories tonight, that way if I still want a snack later, I can have something without undoing all my hardwork throughout the day.
I am super sore too! I have kept up with exercise and water. My body hurts! I think I am hanging on to a lot of water because of my sore muscles. It hurts to sit down or stand up! It is a good thing though, I know that! If I start to fall off the wagon tonight, you may see another post!
Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Yesterday, I did good until the evening. Instead of snacking, I should have just done my homework and it would have been a win-win. Instead, I turned on the TV. That is the kiss of death for me. I knew that, but last night I (for whatever reason), just did it. I wasn't thinking and I think I was just falling into old habits. I did go to the gym though and took a class that just kicked my butt! It was awesome, I couldn't even catch my breath. I love dance classes! So, there was a victory yesterday for going to the gym and eating a healthy lunch out. My improvement was to keep my snacking at night to a minimun. If I don't have the calories left, I don't have the option to snack. I need to remember that tonight.
Also, I think my body is trying to fight off a cold. I am so tired and I feel like I can sleep for days. I need to pay attention to my body. Today's goal: Stay under 1550 calories and go to the gym. Turbo Kickboxing tonight! Woohoo!
Sunday, June 07, 2009
I have been on and off WW for 22 years now. More of my life has been dieting, dieting, dieting and being totally aware of what I was doing and then chucking it out the window. Apparently, that is not working for me. I have lost the most weight by doing it on my own, yet I feel some type of need to have WW in my life. Maybe it is my security blanket that I need to learn not to have anymore.
I am going to do a little assessment on myself this week. I am going to do Spark 100% this week. Keep my calories below 1550, exercise at least 30 minutes a day and get my water in. At the end of the week, I will weigh myself and if I have lost weight, I will make the decision to get rid of my security blanket. I have not attended meetings in 3 weeks anyhow. Also, that $39.95 I am paying each month can go to my non-food rewards for doing a good job! Plus, I am going to Europe in December, so that will be a found $280! That is what would have gone to WW meetings each month, until December 2009 . Wow! That is a lot when you add it up...It is $479.40 a year to do WW. How come I have never looked at it that way before?!
Anyways...I read something interesting in the paper today. IMHO, our President has a million and one things to do and worry about each day. However, he exercises 45 minutes, 6 days a week! I have a lot less on my plate than he does, so I have no excuse as to why I can't get my behind out there for 45 minutes at least 5-6 times a week. No reason whatsoever!
I guess it really goes back to "You can't take care of others unless you take care of yourself first". I know this, but somehow it doesn't translate into action. Maybe I need to teach myself this principle through practice.
I will continue with the blog throughout the week and will promise (to myself) that I will blog when I want to turn to food. I need to teach myself that food is not a replacement in avoiding emotions. Baby steps, baby steps...
Sunday, May 31, 2009
helpful! My best friend and I talked....a lot over the last two weeks. I have realized that I literally feed my feelings instead of allowing myself to feel them. It seems so stupid. But, this week, I stopped my diets and took a look at what I was doing. It was like a self evaluation. It was amazing. If I was angry, mad, frustrated, procrasting, overwhelmed or didn't know what to do with myself, I went to the fridge. Now, I know this is not healthy behavior. But it is the first time that I actually realized it. What made it more real was that I voiced this to my best friend who has known me for years. By telling her, I think that I felt this feeling was real. It was all very strange and felt very foreign to me. I think I cried a bunch this week and I am not normally a crier. Actually, only at really sad movies do I usually cry. All I can say is that having realized this and recognized the patterned behavior, I have the ability to change it. It is going to be tough, but I will take it one step at a time.
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