Monday, September 01, 2014
Wow, it took me seven years to get a little over 50,000 SparkPoints! Does that say anything about how much I was on-again/off-again? Every year since then, I have made today's date a restarting point, based on how much success I was having with myself, as far as how close or far I was from my goal weight. This year, I am completely ashamed at just how far away from goal I have strayed! I am teetering at just under 300 pounds again, from an all-time high of 340! You had better believe that I will never again weigh 340 pounds, and that's not a threat!
This month will also bring a new overhaul of my exercise regimen--or lack of. I finally have a mountain bike, and if nobody else cares whether or not they see my fat butt hanging over the bike seat, then why should I care? I am sure that with as out of shape as I am right now, my butt will be the least of my concerns, and hopefully is the least of yours.
This is also a month for another new beginning. I'm starting school again on the 2nd, for sure this time, with a different concentration; getting my BA in Applied Behavioral Science instead of Psychology. I know, big change. That is going to take a while, though, but this time I fully intend on finishing the program.
No more procrastinating with my future!
Thursday, August 28, 2014
I enrolled at Ashford University again, instead of going to the local college who had me down for 6 classes, my first semester. I much prefer the one-class-at-a-time scenario over the traditional style of learning. I'm going to be studying Applied Behavioral Science and I'm hoping these next 4 years go by fast.
I went and got a new, free interviewing outfit from Dress for Success out of Cincinnati. I may have to pick up a part-time job soon, depending on how our money situation flies, and they hooked me up with slacks, two shirts, a blazer, a necklace, a pair of dress shoes, and a purse. They also fed us lunch. The brownies were awesome... which leads me to my next topic.
Folks, I'm about to smack myself upside the head a few times if I don't get a grip on my eating habits! My weight has skyrocketed again, and I have no one to blame but me. We're talking, I'm fewer than 10 pounds away from 300 again. That's just ridiculous for me! I have no valid reason for why I have allowed myself to obviously continue eating more, much more than I should. I need an intervention!
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
Sleep? I'm not quite sure if I know what that is anymore. I swear I will lay down and fall asleep, but within 1-2 hours I wake up, fully awake! My psychiatrist is a gimp because he seems to think that Trazodone is the only medication available to help with sleep. All he does is he continues to increase my dosage for that instead of trying something else. Oh well... by the end of next week, I should be on a schedule again, so that may help.
Hugs go out to my dearest friend, Amy, who has recently been united with someone she loves very much! I swear I will make a road trip down to Houston one of these days/months/years (hopefully not years).
Monday, I start school again. This time it's going to be very challenging for me because they're starting me out with 6 classes my first semester. But at least I will be back in a classroom instead of trying to kill myself--I mean, do tons of writing with how the online classes were.
Okay, that was fun. I must go now because I'm starting to dream while I'm awake, literally. I just almost got up to go get my infant son to change his poopy diaper, yet I don't have any babies, let alone any kids living with me. I really hope I'm not turning psychotic or anything! But this has been happening more and more, where my dreams start flirting with my conscious life and I have to do a major reality check sometimes just to make sure there isn't anything out there with my name on it that I don't know about.
Saturday, August 16, 2014
A few days ago, my psychiatrist prescribed Adderall XR to me to help me pay attention and be able to focus in class. I can tell already, even on my low starting dose, that my appetite is waning! I know they say ADHD medications tend to cause weight loss, so this will be awesome if it helps me lose weight, too.
Last night, I picked up a free, used mountain bike from a nice gal who offered it to me in a group on Facebook! I'm scared to ride it, though. Do big people get made fun of when they're seen riding a bike? Also, is it the law to wear a helmet while riding? I sure hope not!
Today, I picked up a HUGE garbage bag filled to the brim with free clothes for me! They were from another nice lady on Facebook. Some of the clothes are a bit snug, but they will just give me incentive to lose weight.
Feeling blessed is how I've been feeling recently, even having a broken nose and two black eyes can't keep me from feeling like the Big Man in Heaven is taking care of me!
Friday, August 08, 2014
Today I'm beginning my prep do be able to walk a 5K in 5 weeks. I am too big and too out of shape to try running it, so walking it will still be more than I've ever done before. I wish I had someone to do this with, especially if it was my boyfriend or even a local sparker. But I will be brave and go it alone!
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