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Not Feeling It

Sunday, November 03, 2013

I think (read: know for a fact) I gave up on myself this week.

It didn't start that way, though. My week actually started with major progress. I spent last weekend gutting out my room and completely redoing it. I think I put in at least 24-30 hours of work between house cleaning and moving furniture between Friday and Monday. My sleep suffered for it, though.

That led to quickie meals and naps rather than sleep. The meals, still, weren't that bad. Homemade pasta salad that conforms to a migraine headache diet, homemade egg salad...things like that. Still relatively sane.

Unfortunately, the lack of sleep and frustration caught up with me...

My lack of sleep has led to several days (read: about a week) of being forever exhausted and not having the energy to do anything. Sigh. I have severe depression and vestibular migraines. I DON'T NEED MORE REASONS TO BE EXHAUSTED OR HAVE A LACK OF ENERGY!!!

Trying to conform to a very strict migraine diet has led to ever increasing frustration. An overwhelming majority of the things that I enjoy are on the "do not eat/drink" list. Plus, I'm on the go a lot and do not have much free time. So, fixing things to go is difficult at best. Add to that conforming to a diet that pretty much calls for whole, fresh foods when money doesn't quite exist to get it (and what does belongs to the person in the house who actually has the purchasing power...and she is NOT about to give up all the crappy food that she enjoys) and it's a recipe for disaster. It doesn't help that I'm being bombarded by my family getting things they KNOW I like and can't have (because THEY want it) and saying, "Do you want...oh yeah...I forgot you can't have it" followed by eating it right in front of me.

So, I gave up on myself. I gave up on my diet. I gave up on trying to feel better. I gave up on trying to eliminate migraines via diet. Instead, I said hello to my dark roast coffee, McDonald's food, chocolate and a tiny amount of aged cheese.

Two added pounds later, I'm frustrated yet again. So much for losing weight. Sigh.

What's a girl to do?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SUNSET09 11/4/2013 2:25AM

  Find the things that work for you as there will ALWAYS be sabotaging, intentionally and not! The only person that's suffering is YOU! Never give up on yourself as you are all you've got! We're got you, as well! emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PRINCESS_SOFI 11/3/2013 1:36PM

    emoticon Yea I was shopping earlier and my mom just had to buy fresh baked bread and aged cheese. My favorite snack ever. Ugh.

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PB4WEGO 11/3/2013 1:14PM

    I'm so sorry for your week. Please don't give up on yourself, I know there are others that haven't given up on you. It's great that you re-did your room. I clean, neat, organized room always makes me feel better. It's unfortunate that the people in your house are not very supportive, believe in yourself and try to avoid them. Life is too short to have people in your life that don't support you.
Good Luck & God Bless, Annamarie

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If I Had An Hour Extra Per Day...

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

I'd do better meal plan. Plus I'd be an exercising dynamo. And,somehow, I'd get my family to eat better and exercise with me.

If only...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PATTYKLAVER 10/17/2013 7:29AM

    If we all had an extra hour.... I'm glad I'm not the only one wishing for more time.

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Five Second Feeling Check

Monday, October 14, 2013

I'm tired but hopeful.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

PLATINUM755 10/16/2013 9:57PM

    Hang in there! emoticon emoticon emoticon

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STEVEN2GO2 10/15/2013 4:30AM

    Hope is so important, glad you have it! Tired can come and go as you get your needed rest!

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FISHER011 10/14/2013 7:04PM


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Too-Big Clothes

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Once my clothes become too big, I'll gladly give them away. I don't wanna see them in my closet anymore. I wanna look forward, not backward.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MIZPAM25 10/19/2013 2:00PM

    emoticon emoticon emoticon

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PLATINUM755 10/16/2013 10:11PM

    I picked out my favorites and had them tailored to the NEW me...and some I donated. Do what feels right for you!

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MJLUVSANIMALS 10/14/2013 7:11PM

    Good for you, as I lose off the clothes go to a thrift store. I made the mistake many times before to keep clothes in case. In case, doesn't sound like a very good future to me. So out they go! Best idea in the world. I cannot afford to replace for a bigger size anyway. So will keep me smaller. More people need this outlook.

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FISHER011 10/14/2013 7:06PM

    Good outlook!

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PATTYKLAVER 10/14/2013 8:37AM

    It felt so good to have my clothes be too big! I couldn't wait to get them out of the closet and over to the Salvation Army.

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CNTRYGAL 10/13/2013 2:08PM

    I get rid of mine too! I donate the really good stuff to our local women's & children's shelter, and the not so good stuff I tear up to use as cleaning rags or throw away.

A friend of mine saved her sweaters/sweatshirts and she cuts the collars out of them and wears them to the start line of her races. Then either when she starts running she tosses it to the side or tosses it at the first water stop (trash can). That way she doesn't have to worry about keeping track of her "nice" windbreakers when running a race! :)

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LADYBIRD82 10/13/2013 1:55PM

    I feel the same way, that's what I did this weekend. If they were to big they are history. Best of luck and have fun shopping.

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WIFE49 10/13/2013 1:37PM

    That is a good idea. emoticon

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