19 days to go!

Tuesday, January 27, 2009

...and still going strong. I have an amazing surge of willpower for this vacation...going to the gym is not a question, I'm spreading out my meals better than ever even though I'm eating far less than normal (1,200 calories), drinking tons of water, and getting to bed nice and early. I know exactly what I'm doing - I know I can't keep this up for long and all I ask of my body is to do it for the next 19 days. It's kind of insane because so much of what I'm doing is somewhat opposite of my general healthy lifestyle philosophy, but for this exact moment in time it works.

I was down another pound today. I was ashamed to blog about this, but by this past Saturday I had actually managed to get my weight a full TWENTY POUNDS heavier* than it was at my low point in early December. As of today though I am back to 145 pounds after being on track for three full days. I believe I still have about four to five pounds of water weight that will drop off nice and quick, and then I'll have about two weeks to refine. Ideally I'd like to be back to 140 after all the temporary weight is gone and then have two weeks to lose two pounds per week and go on vacation weighing 136.

*Are you wondering how to gain 20 pounds in a month and a half? First, start at a weight that is far lower than what your body is used to. Then surround yourself with food temptations. Then get into a mindset that you are going to eat whatever you want, dammit, beause you work hard and you "deserve" it! (How about DESERVING to have a healthy, fit, and attractive body? Wasn't thinking about that at the time.) Then, gorge yourself on all manner of bagels, pasta, ice cream, candy, hot chocolate, cookies, oh, and lots more cookies, pizza, and chicken nuggets. And start watching TV and playing computer games at the times of day you typically go to the gym. Very effective weight-gain plan!!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KJNE8O 1/28/2009 8:53AM

You are doing great - you are going to be quite the hottie on the beach! Report Inappropriate Comment

MIMISCA 1/27/2009 10:55PM

haha i am so glad i'm not the only one who can laugh about mistakes! yeah i guess how can we expect NOT to gain weight when we all of a sudden change our healthy habits? but obviously you are back on track and still have time to lose those holiday pounds for your beach vacay! Report Inappropriate Comment

LILTROUBLE 1/27/2009 10:11PM

way to go girl!! and you are too funny on your program promo :) hahahah. Report Inappropriate Comment

JENONTHEROX 1/27/2009 9:51PM

Wow, I was on that SAME weight-gain plan for 10 months AND gained... 50 lbs. Amazing. We should do a promo! Report Inappropriate Comment

TERRIANGEL 1/27/2009 9:10PM

you're hilarious! And you're doing FABULOUS! Keep it up girlfriend. It's temporary insanity, but like you said, it's working for now, so if it ain't broke... 19 days. You are SO there!! Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/27/2009 7:38PM

Susan, you are rocking your plan! 19 days, you can do it! Report Inappropriate Comment

KMWKENT 1/27/2009 5:14PM

Unfortunately, my situation is all too similar to yours! The past month has basically been a binge. A week ago, I was up nearly ten pounds from my lowest. I've been too afraid after this week's binge to see the number on the scale, but I can only imagine that the cupcakes, chips, fries, and gallons of ice cream have done quite a bit of damage since then. But like you, I also started back with my healthy eating and exercising for a particular reason: I want to look hot for an upcoming event! I'm fortunate enough to have a bit longer than 19 days, so I'm able to take a slightly less drastic approach (1500 cals), but I echo your sentiments about having a surge of willpower! I'm crossing my fingers that the weight will fall off for me as quickly as yours has! Thanks for your honesty in your blogs! You're sooooo not alone in this! Report Inappropriate Comment

20 days to go and noticing predictable things happening to my body...

Monday, January 26, 2009

I have now lost EIGHT pounds in two days of being hardcore. But of course I probably put the extra weight on about that fast too...talk about a roller coaster.

I have just started reading _Health at Every Size_ which so far is about the set-point theory and how to listen to your body because it will guide you to your own healthiest weight. Very interesting, but I haven't gotten very far into the book yet. I've mentioned before that I suspect my set-point weight is around 165-175, and I do NOT want that to be my permanent weight range!! But it is a relief to know that my crazy urges to eat aren't just a lack of willpower. I've forced my body to stay quite a bit below my set-point for two years now, which means that there are many forces working within me driving me to eat and gain weight. Well, if you believe the theory, that is.

So far I've been able to handle my new bootcamp calorie range OK, but I know it's going to get harder the further into it I get. Hopefully my motivation to get my bikini body back in time for vacation will be enough motivation to get me through the tough times...it's just 20 more days...I can do this.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FRIZGIRL 1/27/2009 12:27PM

20 days! You can do it! And way to go keeping that weight off for two years. I have heard that if you can keep it off, your set weight does drop over time, so it will be easier as your body adjusts to the lower weight and realizes that it really IS getting everything it needs even though you are eating less. Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/27/2009 11:04AM

You can do anything for 20 days!!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

TMAC10 1/27/2009 8:52AM

8 pounds...you really are rockin it girl! You are going to look so hot in 20 days, I cant wait! :) Report Inappropriate Comment

TERRIANGEL 1/27/2009 8:26AM

EIGHT POUNDS!!!! Holy cow! Congratulations!!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

TRACYZABELLE 1/27/2009 7:00AM

You can do it!We know you can!!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

WWGAL23 1/26/2009 11:23PM

20 days?! You can SO do it! Keep up the great work it'll so be worth it!! Cant wait to see the vaca pics and stories!!! You are going to look AWESOME! Report Inappropriate Comment

MIMISCA 1/26/2009 10:26PM

20 days? that's nothing for you- i know you can do it! i can't wait to see pics from your vacation - i am sure you will be looking sexy! good luck! Report Inappropriate Comment

KJNE8O 1/26/2009 9:51PM

Did you eat foods that were high in carbs and possibly sodium? 8 pounds in 2 day is A LOT! It's probably water and glycogen and not truly fat.... just be careful - you get too hard core and lose to fast you gain it all back too fast too. But I also think that you know what you are doing and know your body - so you are going to look great when you go on vacation! How exciting! Report Inappropriate Comment

SWEATONCEADAY 1/26/2009 9:22PM

i think my set point is about 130. as soon as i go under that my body goes nuts and i want to eat everything in site. 8 lbs in 2 days is impressive. maybe i will put that book on my library list. Report Inappropriate Comment

MARLIE13 1/26/2009 7:16PM

Oh that does sound very interesting. You'll have to let us know what you find out! Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/26/2009 6:58PM

20 days to a kick butt as always you! Report Inappropriate Comment

AMY-ABLE 1/26/2009 5:51PM

Wow... sounds very hardcore! Keep up the good work! Report Inappropriate Comment

21 days to go...a challenge was just what I needed!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Three weeks to go! This morning I was down about four pounds after just one day of being on track hard core. A little momentum is going a long way. I spent a while yesterday looking at pictures of Puerto Plata, which is where we're going on vacation, and I even did a web search for bikinis just to get inspired. It worked. I REFUSE to go on vacation looking anything other than my best!

It's true that I have a great long-term plan that I've developed over time. But it's also apparent that I still need to shake things up once in a while. I plan to get back to my usual routine after vacation, but for now, I am loving the idea of having to step up to the plate for a major challenge.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RA4945 1/26/2009 5:19PM

Hey Susan, thanks for your comment on my blog. Yeh, hiding water bottles slowed me a bit but it was worth it. I figure carrying the darn thing slows me down a bit too. I don't like anything in my hands when I run. Sounds like you are back on the right track! I'm so proud of you because I understand the struggle with eating right. I'm so tired of eating like crap everytime my selfish little heart desires it. I need discipline! Like I have with working out! You have it too. I know that you are going to reach your goals. There has got to be a way to break that brain "set point" and reset it to a lower weight. Especially when we know we have the weight to lose. So lets keep pressing forward and breaking the barriers. I'm cheering for you Susan! You can do this!! Report Inappropriate Comment

STEPHJOGO 1/26/2009 12:48PM

Way to go! You're doing so awesome. Can't wait to hear about your vacation and see pictures of you showing off the results of your hard work! Three weeks is right around the corner!! Report Inappropriate Comment

WWGAL23 1/26/2009 12:39PM

Awesome job sister! Congrats on the weight loss after only one day! You will definitely be fit and ready for that bikini for vacation! You are such motivation for me! You are doing so GREAT! Keep it up! Report Inappropriate Comment

FRIZGIRL 1/26/2009 10:19AM

Wow, you are doing amazing!!!! You have come so far and I think it is great that you are shaking things up! You are going to look fantastic at Puerto Plata! Keep up the good work! Report Inappropriate Comment

TRACYZABELLE 1/26/2009 5:51AM

You go girl!! You will get there! Can't wait to see the bikini! Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/26/2009 12:29AM

4lbs?! Yowzah! Go Girl! Report Inappropriate Comment

FATGIRLJAC 1/25/2009 5:35PM

Wow, I can hardly wait for the day I can even think about a swimsuit; let alone a bikini! And already seeing rewards is AWESOME!! Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/25/2009 4:56PM

Nothing wrong with kicking it up a notch! Even better when you are already seeing rewards! Rock on! Report Inappropriate Comment

BRUIN2 1/25/2009 2:56PM

Right on!! Report Inappropriate Comment

MARLIE13 1/25/2009 2:46PM

I think it's time that I start surfing and looking at bikinis too. Thanks for the inspiration and kick in the pants! Report Inappropriate Comment

BLUEBOOEYES 1/25/2009 2:25PM

I agree with the shaking things up idea, even when you know your normal plan is working to maintain. I created a little birthday challenge for myself over the next 3 weeks. I'm on Day 4 and going strong. I'm also down 2 lbs already. KEEP UP THE GREAT WORK!! Report Inappropriate Comment

One day down, 22 to go!

Saturday, January 24, 2009

First of all let me get the defensive stuff out of the way. What I wrote yesterday was like daydreaming...I wasn't listing goals as much as fantasizing. Do you know the quote, "Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars"? That's what I was doing. I'm more motivated by dreaming big than I am by being politically correct all the time!

So, without apology, I have a hardcore bikini bootcamp plan. I'm going all out for 23 days, starting today. I've gotten far off base, but it hasn't been all that long, and I believe I can shock my body back to where it was if I work really hard. It'll be much easier now than if I let the new extra weight settle in longer.

It's easy for me to start on a Saturday. My gym has such amazing classes on Saturdays so I always get a great workout, and I'm always busy with household chores, plus I have my guy aroud to keep me in line. It is not going to be at all easy to stick with my plan during the week, but I will only have a total of 15 weekdays on this plan. I can do this.

Twenty-two days from now, I'm off to the warm sunny sands of the Carribbean.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

BLUEBOOEYES 1/25/2009 2:24PM

I have that quote on my page and I totally know what you mean. It's the 90/10 principle. If you aim high, even if you put it out there for 100% of your goals in the beginning, you can always count on the 90% achieved, 10% error margin. And achieving 90% of your intended efforts is still really freakin good. Report Inappropriate Comment

LILTROUBLE 1/25/2009 1:33PM

Woohoo. Kick booty!! You can do it. Report Inappropriate Comment

TERRIANGEL 1/25/2009 11:58AM

Now if that's not motivation, I don't know what is! :) You can totally do this. Positively. No doubts. Bikini ready and rearing to go!!!! WOO HOOOOO!! And thank you for my anniversary wishes. It was so fun. Love that guy. Now go kick some bikini butt!! Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/25/2009 1:33AM

Woohoo! 22 and counting down!! Have a great Weekend! Caribean in 22 more days?!?!? So Awesome! Report Inappropriate Comment

ASTARB1 1/24/2009 11:13PM

I'm totally with you in regards to your big dreams. Even if you only partially succeed on just a few of your goals, you'll be a better person for it. What class did you do today? Report Inappropriate Comment

PAMELA984 1/24/2009 9:27PM

You can do this!!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

What would the IDEAL me do?

Friday, January 23, 2009

I'm a work in progress. Sometimes it feels like I've taken two steps forward, seventeen thousand steps back. But what would perfection even look like, for me? What would be my best? What would that look like? Here are some ideas:

*My weight would be STABLE
*I wouldn't obsess, but I would follow some guidelines
*I would go to bed at 9 p.m. and get up at 6 a.m. every day
*I would read more
*I would keep my condo cleaner and neater, and I'd finally get around to fixing up certain things around here
*I'd recycle (well...thanks to Jess, we've already started doing this!)
*I'd still be able to have treats. I'd figure out a way to have small treats, so small they don't affect my weight, and I wouldn't feel guilty about it or let that trigger binge patterns
*I'd figure out how to eliminate bingeing once and for all
*I'd do cardio 5-6 times a week and strength training 3 times a week (and stretching with every workout)
*I'd probably drink just one cup of coffee a day, plus have some occasionally as treats (see bullet on treats above)
*I'd drink a LOT of water. And green tea.
*I'd weigh 130 and be a size 2
*I wouldn't get overly hungry or overly full
*I'd figure out how to handle restaurants, vacations, parties, work luncheons, and other special occasions without impacting my weight or feeling deprived
*I'd feel happy and energetic, without aches and pains, and I'd sleep well
*I'd have really good skin and hair
*My mom and I would get along consistently
*I'd see my friends more often
*I'd spend less time with the TV/computer
*I'd try new active challenges on a regular basis
*I wouldn't let "I'm tired" or "I don't feel like it" or "I've been working hard so I deserve to rest" be an excuse to be a sloth or not enjoy my life
*Jess and I...er...too personal, use your imagination
*I'd be an involved, caring, well-informed teacher who got great results using best practices
*I'd manage my time better at school
*I'd stay organized

I think I'm starting to see some categories taking shape... so I'm going to cut off the specifics and try to identify the broad areas:
*Diet, exercise, and other healthy lifestyle choices - consistent, moderate, non-obsessive
*Enjoying results of the above
*Organization/time management
*Social/emotional/happiness/active lifestyle (some things could fit in more than one category)
*Teaching/professional life
*Ethical/making choices I can be proud of

I'm a special education teacher and part of my job is writing Individualized Education Programs for students. I've often thought it'd be a useful exercise to write an Individualized Health Program for myself. (Health, or weight management, or whatever you want to call it!) This is reminding me of that idea because I'm coming up with broad goal areas, like the goals in IEPs. It's obviously time for me to come up with something new. I have one Spark friend who actually started a whole new account when it was time to wipe the slate clean and start fresh. I can't bear to part with all my old info...but I do think it's time for a makeover of my Spark page and my program in general.

Oh, one more very important item to my list:

*I would figure out a way to keep the flame of motivation burning at all times!

My behavior lately has been like a child's who is acting out as a way of letting her caregivers know she needs help. I haven't been taking care of myself. It is time for a big, big overhaul. Only, I keep telling myself that, and then going back to the bad choices. It's time to do something significant enough that it sticks. To be continued. (once I figure this out.)

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TERRIANGEL 1/25/2009 12:03PM

My perfect me list would sound surprisingly similar, too. I think our personalities are very much alike. I've said the same things over and over and really want to be there with you. It sounds like we're in the exact same place right now---had done fabulous things a little while ago, and now have slacked for a while and gained weight (blech). I think I'll check in with you very regularly (and re subscribe to your blogs - I lost it for some reason - I think Spark just does that from time to time) and maybe we can truly do this together. Thanks for being so honest. It's like reading my own thoughts in blog form. :) :) Onward, sistah! Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/24/2009 7:45AM

The "perfect" me--- my list would sounds similar in many areas, tailored to my own life--- I think it's ironic that you seek the "perfect me", because as much as it essential to have a plan, putting too much pressure onyourself might backfire! Where is the fun??? I walked in the door last night, exhausted and under the weather and my husband's girl cousin asked me how I was doing... I told her fine, but I was thinking: you are out there doing what it is you love doing and I am just trying to get all these things done that are on my agenda-- it didn't help that I have to work today and have even less time to get all done---where do I find the time to just chill out and have fun without being exhausted? Also, another thing that occured to me: all works out well when I'm feeling well- God forbid I am feeling under the weather-LOL? and have to modify, adjust plans, yet somehow still want to get it all done.... too much presssure? I am a firm believer that starting over is saying that you want to get rid of the old-- it is essential to move forward, but as you said, every decision you make, is like starting over, so it's not about some grand plans, it's all about the little things.... I know you'll figure it out--- you are smart, dedicated, committed and really determined! I really respect and admire that! As for perfect? Well, I'm glad you're not, because I'd feel like you're on a different planet and sooo unreachable. Good luck Susan! Report Inappropriate Comment

WITTYFLOWER 1/24/2009 7:01AM

I love your own IEP's...written down. I love this blog. Thanks for sharing. It's funny that you are applying what you do from work with the kids to yourself because I do this too. I am a school counselor and I do set up goals for the kids who have behavior problems like a behavior contract. I have something similiar to that for myself relating to my personal goals. Comment edited on: 1/24/2009 7:06:15 AM Report Inappropriate Comment

FITGIRL15 1/24/2009 2:09AM

I agree! You know best when the old plan just needs an overhaul! I think all of your points are very well thought out and realistic however putting such a strong emphasis on being a certain size or weight can often backfire!!! I hope you start to love you for YOU because you are awesome just as you are!!! We can always work harder... But you must ask yourself "at what cost?" Personally, I'm only trying to seek my peak weight just once... And it most definitely won't last forever... Actually, being at your peak isn't healthy for extended periods of time! Good luck with your new plan!!! -jessica Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/23/2009 10:38PM

What a great re-focusing exercise! This is awesome! I know you can achieve your goals, and I hope you do! There will always be bumps in the road but this little list should get you back on track! Way to go Susan! Report Inappropriate Comment

LILTROUBLE 1/23/2009 9:12PM

This is terrific. It shows just how strong, smart and capable you are. You made so many good points and can totally be the IDEAL you. Report Inappropriate Comment

BRUIN2 1/23/2009 8:11PM

Loved this! And you know what I love the most? These are realistic and achievable!! Happy weekend! Report Inappropriate Comment

KJNE8O 1/23/2009 8:10PM

Wow - these sure are a lot of goals! After you get them broken down into categories then take one from each category and work on that one until you have it mastered... then you add another goal. I found that what I thought was a goal, once I got to the goal, changed in some way or the goal along the way became less important or something changed in my life to change my goals. It's all about the journey really, not the destination. We are alway a work in progress. And finally, if you find yourself not achieving the goal as fast as you think you should, or you take one of those steps backward, or whatever may happen, be kind to yourself! If we talked to our friends the way that we talk to ourselves we wouldn't have any friends! Report Inappropriate Comment