So Grateful for my Spark Friends

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

TOM was LAST week, so why am I so emotional right now? I am so overwhelmingly touched by all the comments left on yesterday's blog entry. It seems like you ladies understand me better than my real life friends. What Liltrouble said hit the nail on the head exactly:

"I do think that there is a really thin balance of being fit and healthy and enjoying life, versus being fit and thin and having to work so hard at it. Maybe I am lazy but I definitely think that there is a set amount of work that I am willing to put in and a set amount of deprivation. Beyond that it is not worth it for me."

That's just it. I want to be fit and healthy, I want to feel good, I want to be active and energetic and happy. I don't want to feel like my life is ruled by calories and meal plans and hunger!! So what if I can't fit into my size four pants. I fit into size six!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not only did I get two pages of beautifully supportive comments, but I also realized I am a Spark Motivator now. I don't know who nominated me or when it happened, but I just noticed it a few minutes ago. I always thought you'd get some kind of message when that happened, but I wouldn't have even known if I hadn't happened to look at my main page.

THANK YOU, to my wonderful Spark friends!!! We are all in this together!

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITGIRL15 1/24/2009 2:00AM

Congrats Susan! You deserve this!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

FRIZGIRL 1/23/2009 7:42AM

awesome job being a motivator and good luck with the new outlook! Report Inappropriate Comment

CREATINGMYSELF 1/22/2009 10:30PM

Congrats on being a Spark Motivator-- you deserve it. You are a source of support and motivation for a lot of us, and I'm sure every one appreciates it!! Report Inappropriate Comment

SARAH_VW 1/22/2009 2:26PM

Congrats on being a motivator!! Report Inappropriate Comment

ASTARB1 1/22/2009 1:22PM

Your blogs are definitely motivating for me and they are so relevant for me. Congrats on the kudos - well deserved! Report Inappropriate Comment

TRACYZABELLE 1/22/2009 5:55AM

I know you motivate me to move more and it is hard to move me that is for sure! We are all here for the same reason and people like you make it a lot easier to keep it real! We can not punish ourselves for a slip up, stuff happens... as long as we get back on the horse that threw us! Report Inappropriate Comment

JENNIFERBH 1/21/2009 8:17PM

You deserve it! I read your blog yesterday but did not comment. As a person with a history of eating disorders, the word "binge" is not a word to just toss at somebody. We all have set backs. If we didn't, we would not learn from them. You are so with it that you are second guessing yourself. Stick with it Girl!!!! Don't let ANYONE get in your way. I am after the same thing, I want to figure out how to maintain without being so strict. I still have weight to loose but, then what? I got down to 117 2 years ago and then put most of it back on. I need to find a way once I loose the weight, to keep it off in a healthy and LOGICAL way. I am a social person and food is my social drug!LOL Jennifer I hate TOM..... Comment edited on: 1/21/2009 8:19:05 PM Report Inappropriate Comment

EMILYLYN1 1/21/2009 6:56PM

congrats susan! Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/21/2009 1:31PM

Congrats on being a Sparkmotivator-- you certainly never fail to motivate me! We are all in this together and I certainly feel grateful for having you part of this journey! Hang in there-- it is a journey! Report Inappropriate Comment

RA4945 1/21/2009 11:46AM

Congrats on becoming a SP motivator! You do help a lot of people with your honesty and perseverance! Keep it up! Report Inappropriate Comment

KJNE8O 1/21/2009 11:45AM

Hey - Congratulations on being a Spark Motivator! See, even in the depths of our own despair we are able to help people. Also glad you're feeling better! Hang in there - you are doing great! Report Inappropriate Comment

MARLIE13 1/21/2009 10:20AM

Congratulations on being a spark motivator. That's so exciting and something you totally deserve! I think that is excellent thinking in changing your mindset and focus now to maintaining fit and healthy versus deprivation. Here's to a new focus and a new set of goals and accomplishments!! Report Inappropriate Comment

SWEATONCEADAY 1/21/2009 1:05AM

congrats on being a sparkpeople motivator! Report Inappropriate Comment

TMAC10 1/20/2009 9:52PM

i just wanted to say that you are amazing... :) & i'm always grateful for you & your encouragement! Report Inappropriate Comment

LILTROUBLE 1/20/2009 9:13PM

=) Glad I helped you see the light. You are doing so awesome and have SO much to live for. So make sure you are working out to live, not living to work out. Hehehehe. You rock. Report Inappropriate Comment

BRUIN2 1/20/2009 7:28PM

This blog made me soooo happy! It's great to hear this from you - THIS sounds like the girl from late summer/fall who was trying new things and ROCKING life in general. Report Inappropriate Comment

PAMELA984 1/20/2009 7:18PM

Congratulations on being a Spark Motivator! You should have been sent a spark mail though - at least I know that I was when it happened to me. What a wonderful honor - you truly are a motivator - at least to me! Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/20/2009 6:28PM

Hey Susan! Congrats on your Spark Motivator Accomplishment! You SO deserve it! Yipee!!! I am glad that you have returned to the blogging, I think it is so good for us to work the stuff out in our head on paper sometimes! You are an amazing force and you can accomplish anything! I am so happy to hear that you are choosing your "anythings" with care and intention! Six's are nothing to scoff at! That is crazy skinny! You are a leader and you are beautiful! Keep up your awesomeness! By the way, I feel the same way about the support and motivation here. It is such a blessing to have found Spark, there are some really great people here, you included! Report Inappropriate Comment

A Me Update

Monday, January 19, 2009

Is this the longest break from blogging I've ever taken? Where do I start??

I guess I will fess up and start with where I left off - last Tuesday. Warning - this is going to get ugly.

Tuesday through Friday of this past week were HORRIBLE. I had a raging case of PMS that turned into a raging case of TOM. I felt like crying for no reason.. well, at first I had no reason, but quickly I felt like crying because of what I was doing to myself. It was incredibly cold - one morning it was NEGATIVE 8 degrees!! I had tons of work to do including TWO reports. And Girl Scout cookies were for sale in the teacher's room - nobody was watching - you just put your $3.50 in the envelope and take your cookies - honor system.

Well, the fact that I spent $7 per day on cookies was just part of the horribleness. I just wanted to constantly be eating something. And not my healthy grapefruits or salads either, which I was neglecting. No, it was candy and hot chocolate and pasta and bagels for me... And I didn't go to the gym once in that time, and I didn't get quite enough sleep either. My stomach was looking DISGUSTING by the time my head cleared.

Well, I have to just KISS my gym. I LOVE YOU, GOLD'S GYM!!! They had "Winterfest" at my gym on Saturday and you had to sign up in advance for classes. So of course I'd signed up as early as I could for my regular Saturday morning lineup - Zumba, Body Pump, and Body Combat. The night before I was having dreams that even my workout clothes wouldn't fit me anymore, but I went, and it was soooooo fun. They had multiple instructors for each class, all in costumes, all new releases of music and moves, and there were prizes!! I won a Gold's T-shirt (that I will never wear - anyone want it?), a month off my membership, and two free smoothies from the juice bar! I had one as I was leaving that day, and the other today - frozen strawberries, skim milk, and strawberry Myoplex. (Tangent - I'm thinking a lot about protein lately - will it really help me stay full if I increase it?) As I was leaving the gym, the one instructor who knows I'd lost 30 pounds said to me, "You still look great!" Obviously, she said that because she thought I needed a boost...

Oh, and one of my gym buddies asked me (by the spread of bagels and orange wedges they had out for Winterfest - I only had two orange wedges, no bagels!), "When you start bingeing, how do you stop?"

I responded, "I don't know - I haven't stopped!"

This is the same woman who told me I was looking too thin only a few short weeks ago, when I had a totally different body. Now though, we exchanged phone numbers and she told me to call her if I ever felt like bingeing.

Thankfully, however, I haven't. I mean, I'd still love to go buy another bag of peanut butter cups and eat them all in one night. But I haven't. I haven't been perfect...I probably ate too much at an Indian restaurant the other night, and I haven't tracked the Myoplex smoothies on my tracker...but ANYTHING is ok if it's not bingeing!

Sunday morning I awoke to snow, but I have a Jeep now so I fearlessly drove to a different Gold's location - one not too far from my boyfriend's place - that I'd been to once before. I took a Zumba class there and did over an hour on various cardio machines in addition. I also ripped a few recipes out of magazines, a couple of which I made today, with my own spin which means adding a lot more vegetables. One is shrimp with tomatoes and feta (I added spinach) and I think it looks just like something you'd get at an Italian restaurant. The other is this chicken salsa thing but I got really creative with what I added...in addition to adding extra veggies, I added some frozen mango!! I think it's so neat to add fruit to meat dishes, if you're brave enough!

Today there was no school - MLK Day - and I was happy to find out that one of my favorite instructors was doing back to back Body Pump and Body Combat this morning. The classes were packed and stuffy so I got really sweaty. I then went home to get my gift certificate for my 2nd free smoothie, and then went right back to the gym, had the smoothie, and then did over an hour on the stair climber!! My instructor was just leaving as I was coming back, and I was embarrassed about working out again so I lied and said I was just back for my smoothie.

Whenever I've been eating a lot I have soooo much energy for the gym...faster, longer workouts. I feel happier and more energetic. I love being able to go to restaurants and eating like other people. I really need to rethink my long term goals.....I am pretty confused right now... BUT, I am going to the Carribbean in exactly four weeks and so want to look good in a bikini there. I had this silly idea to think of my life as a "celebrity health spa" with the celebrity in question being ME and the goal being ready for my big photo shoot on the white sands of the Carribbean. :) Healthy spa food, lots of lovely spa sleep and water and tea, and the gym is just a quick walk from my door......I could squint and pretend my life really was a spa. :)

I also toyed with the idea of cutting back on calories quite a bit in preparation for my trip, but in the end decided to cut back just 100 calories. With the binge mindset I've had lately I better not let myself get overly hungry....

Yesterday I sat at Barnes & Noble with a skinny latte and read _The Amazing Adventures of Diet Girl_. It's basically just all her blog entries as she lost weight... just think...all of us bloggers could be unwittingly writing our first books right now! :) Anyway, she went from 351 pounds to 175 (never quite hitting her original goal of 165 - she was 5'9", I think..). I like that she had setbacks a few times in the book and didn't weigh in for a while, and then she finally would get a burst of inspiration and start weighing in again, much higher than before, but she kept going and lost it all again and then more. Just like me, she started with Weight Watchers and then felt like she was outgrowing that program - too much emphasis on fake low-cal food and not enough emphasis on exercise. Also just like me, she got hooked on Body Pump and Body Combat. Cool, huh?

Weight-wise, I was too ashamed of myself to weigh in for a few days there, but on Saturday afternoon, after having been at the gym all morning, I went for it. Keep in mind this was the middle of the day and I'd just had a big smoothie, but I weighed 156!!! Sunday morning I weighed 150, and today I weighed 147.

I don't know what to do with myself. I don't know if I'll be proud of my body when I go on vacation. I don't even know if I want to put in the work it takes to weigh in the 130s anymore. I mean I definitely do for vacation, but in general I'm not sure! I wish I could keep this fun energetic feeling even when I've been controlling my calories for a while...!?

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

THIRTEENREASONS 1/23/2009 5:05PM

I am so glad that I was able to come back to some new blogs from you. I understand you about the binging, I've had quite a few of them over the past couple of weeks, too. For some odd reason I always feel the need to weigh myself after a binge. I know the number will be larger than usual, so looking back I don't know why I torture myself with it. I think I'm finally getting to a point of excepting my body for how it is. I can change how I look as much as I want, but I'm always going to have that urge to eat the way I used to. I always ask myself "will it be like this forever?", but now I've realized that even though the urge to binge will always be what it is, forever, the way I react to it won't be forever. Report Inappropriate Comment

TRACYZABELLE 1/22/2009 5:52AM

Sometimes life just throws us a curvball and we duck the wrong way..I know you are a motivated woman and will come back from this because you like the thinner, slimmer you better. We will not judge you because we have all been there.. We are here to support you not tear you down. We are here to lift you up! Report Inappropriate Comment

SWEATONCEADAY 1/20/2009 4:22PM

sorry you had a rough week. us bunnies are getting close to syncing up lol. we all seemed to have bad tom/pms this month. i love gold's! out of all the gym chains i have ever been a member of (5) it has been far my fav!!!1 if there was one closer to me i would get a gym membership back. Report Inappropriate Comment

RA4945 1/20/2009 12:03PM

Hi Susan! You are a strong woman! Much stronger than you've ever given yourself credit for. I, like you, would rather exercise harder just so I can eat more of what I want. I realize I wouldn't have to work out as hard if I would just eat less! But this is our battle and finding balance is the key. I admire you for your persistence and ambition because you are NOT a quitter! Knowing that you are willing to put in the work on your body with regards to exercise shows me that you also have it inside of you to apply to your eating. That has been a hard one for me to grasp as well. But we keep pressing forward and putting our mistakes behind us. Lets keep being realistic knowing that big changes are usually more dangerous than helpful. Keep making the small changes and celebrating the small victories. Baby steps are the best way to go. Make peace with your body as it is today, not what it will be in a few weeks or how it has been in the past. Celebrate today because you are beautiful and worth all of the effort. Report Inappropriate Comment

MARLIE13 1/19/2009 11:24PM

YES bump your protein! =o) It's nice to know others are human. lol! Perfect is boring and your binge was probably good for your soul. I bet you learned some great things about yourself and the next time this happens...because there will be a next time...you will have armed yourself with strategies to make it through a little quicker. Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/19/2009 11:21PM

Oh, Honey. I am sorry. I know how this stuff goes, and I'm really able to identify with what you are saying here. I am not sure what the solution is, you just have to keep trying!You look fabulous in the 140's you will ultimately have to decided where you feel best. I am thinking the 130's just aren't realistic for me. I hope that things settle out and you find a balance between the 2 extremes. An aside...Girl Scout cookies are overated. I hope that you will think of that tasty smoothie for the rest of the evil GS cookie season! (smoothie) Here's to then end of binges! Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/19/2009 9:41PM

Oh Susan, You know I can relate more than I'd like to admit-LOL! When I binged during the summer, I'd "choose" Sat, so I could do a well fueled long run-- I felt so energetic and strong vs. worn out. I don't know if this theory applies, but you and I both exercise a lot and I wonder if we "overdo it" and then our body/mind kind of rebels? You got it so much more together than me, because you plan, you cook and you stick to your plan whereas I just eat "whatever I want" and am sooooo unwilling to stick to some "plan" and "give up" foods etc. Why?? It's so complicated, but hearing you say things like " I like eating at a restaurant like other people" really touched a nerve-LOL. Anyways, its good to have you back. I know you'll figure it out-- it sounds like there is some soul searching on your agenda and I think your long term approach is a healthy one! Anyways, I'm here for you to listen- anytime! It's great ot have you back! Report Inappropriate Comment

KJNE8O 1/19/2009 9:40PM

Everyone's right - we all have bad day, weeks, months and even years! I found that I would binge when I was denying myself something... or if my body was just craving/needing to restore it's depleted glycogen stores. You work out a lot and like a long distance runner your muscles can run out of fuel. When they do you end up in search of carbs. Add that to PMS/TOM when your body already craves more carbs and you've got a double whammy. Make sure you are refueling properly after all your workouts. This is just so absolutely critical! Make sure you eat a little protein with all your meals and that you are eating every 3 hours. Keep your proteins/carbs and fats in the recommended ranges - that definitely helps. That should help some of the bingeing. Make sure you aren't denying yourself things. A cookie here or there isn't going to hurt. Enjoy but do so with mindfulness. That said - we all off the wagon... look at me! I fell off for almost 2 years! I am right now 10 pounds heavier than I was 1 year ago and 20 pounds more than 2 years ago! I've had a 2 year binge I guess. But we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off and start over again. And that's OK! Report Inappropriate Comment

BRUIN2 1/19/2009 9:33PM

Glad to hear from you. Keep rocking those classes! Good luck finding the balance!! Report Inappropriate Comment

STEPHJOGO 1/19/2009 9:25PM

We're dieting twins! Not really, but I can so relate to your blog. I too have been avoiding the scale and binging for all I'm worth. But I'm back on track as of today, and I'm hoping to remove the few pounds I've gained by this time next week. I hear you about the amount of work required - vacation is a wonderful motivator to lose the weight and get fit, but for maintenance you may find that the 130's require you to just eat less than you're comfortable with or whatever. I'm struggling to find my maintenance weight, and I'm afraid it might end up higher than what I originally planned. We'll see. Good for you getting back into the classes and the exercise. Glad you 'fessed up and you're back in the game. Even baby steps forward are better than moving backward! Report Inappropriate Comment

LILTROUBLE 1/19/2009 9:23PM

Oh jeez. We all have tough weeks. Sheez - I have been having one for the past year :) The big thing is that the sum of all of your activities has your permanently in a good place with good behaviors. I can't believe that girl said that about binging - is that just me or is that weird. I guess women in general are much happier trying to join each other in misery. I do think that there is a really thin balance of being fit and healthy and enjoying life, versus being fit and thin and having to work so hard at it. Maybe I am lazy but I definitely think that there is a set amount of work that I am willing to put in and a set amount of deprivation. Beyond that it is not worth it for me. You already have reached success and even at your higher weight are successful and healthy and fit. So just take pride in knowing you are doing great. Report Inappropriate Comment

PAMELA984 1/19/2009 8:48PM

Crawl back up onto that wagon - just because you fell off doesn't mean you have to lay down in the mud! You can crawl back up and take baby steps to get back to your plan - you can start right this minute to work towards your cruise! Maybe you should put pictures up of the cruise ship and your destination everywhere you look - in your car, at Jess', at your place, at school - well, you get the picture. Use visualization - remind yourself what you want to look like and how you will look on your cruise! Report Inappropriate Comment

Hungry!

Monday, January 12, 2009

Hmm. Don't look at Lindt chocolates that you can't eat, and then read a NYT article about food online, if you don't want to get really hungry.

Annoyed but not discouraged by my weight. I was 142 today, which means my weight has eased up two full pounds in the past few days, even though I've been sticking to my plan 100 percent. I hope that holiday reckless eating didn't mess with my system and make me unable to lose within my normal calorie range... hopefully I'll see a loss - hopefully back to 140 and THEN some - soon! Maybe I have PMS. I have such unpredictable cycles.

To answer Marlie's question, I made seven servings out of my Mexican lasagna (I always do seven servings of my batch meals - one week's worth) and each serving has 463 calories. Both of my recipes are really good this week!

Here's this week's menu:

Breakfast - coffee with soymilk, green tea, pumpkin pie smoothie

Midmorning snack - 2oz. walnuts, Braeburn apple

Lunch - Mexican lasagna

Afternoon snacks - citrus central - clementine, navel orange, grapefruit, dry rolled oats mixed into vanilla yogurt

Dinner - Brown rice with salmon and Asian veggies

Snack/Second course of dinner :) - Salad of red leaf lettuce, 5 baby carrots, 1 red pepper, 9 grape tomatoes, spices, and some kind of dressing (still using my crazy fat free/sugar free/calorie free Thousand Island, but after that switching to vinegar and spices and maybe some oil)

This evening I went to Body Pump and Hi/Low, which is a rather old-school class with step and floor aerobics and then abs and stretching. For some reason I get really intimidated in Hi/Low, but I think if I went more often I'd get the hang of it and feel more confident. Anyway, it was two hours of exercise but nothing that got me REALLY sweaty or anything. I still think I can kick my own butt, cardio-wise, better than any class can.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RA4945 1/19/2009 12:01PM

Hey Susan! I finally caught up on all your blogs since before New Years. I have been WAY behind on all my Spark blog subscriptions and other emails. I enjoyed catching up on your news though. I had the same struggles over the holiday's and feel like I'm finally getting back on track. I'm really proud of you for not giving up and instead pushing yourself forward and finding what works best for you. You're really doing great! Those 130's are right around the corner sweetie so keep pressing on! And don't focus on that "set point" you mentioned a few blogs back. I honestly believe we can reset that brain set point when we lose weight. We just keep resetting it until we reach the weight we feel is the healthiest for us. My husband bought me a bag of Lindt truffles for Christmas! I can't stop at 1 or 2! It's just ridiculous! They are better than any other chocolate as far as I'm concerned. Haha! Keep up the good work! Report Inappropriate Comment

CREATINGMYSELF 1/18/2009 2:01AM

I give you so much credit for sticking to your meal plan daily. That takes a lot of dedication-- I guess you just found what works for you :) And that's what it's all about! Don't worry about the weight. Obviously you haven't overeaten by 7000 calories in the past 2 days. Don't pay any attention. In fact, as long as you are sticking to your food plan and exercising at the intensity that you normally do I would ditch the scale for a bit. It might mess with your head considering that you are doing everything right and you aren't seeing the results. Trust in your system and you will get the results. Ultimately it's not about the scale it's about the healthy lifestyle-- you are eating good and exercising, that's what matters to your body. Report Inappropriate Comment

TERRIANGEL 1/15/2009 11:43AM

I can kick my own nbutt better, too. BUT (not butt) classes are such a good change up, ya know? and they really will burn some butter, so why not, if you enjoy them, right? And as far as the Lindt. They are evil. E-V-I-L I tell you. I bought a bag on the way home from work on Monday afternoon (I was sick, and feeling sorry for myself, what can I say) and ate half a bag and left the other half in my car. The good news is, they are STILL in my car, frozen. If I hide things in the cupboards, I always know where they are and am hopeless at controlling myself. BUT, if they are in the car, for some reason I actually don't think about them and they may still be in there in the Spring. Of course, now that I'm thinking about them, I really should go throw them away... Report Inappropriate Comment

MARLIE13 1/14/2009 11:30AM

I don't think I really realized that you eat the same thing for dinner each night of the week. Did I read that part wrong? Either way, 7 servings, thanks! Personally, I don't think your holiday eating was severe or long enough to mess with your metabolism to the extent of bumping you into a new calorie range category. With you monitoring things so closely, I'd give it a full two weeks of back to "normal" before you start trying to adjust things. Just my two cents! =o) Report Inappropriate Comment

TRACYZABELLE 1/13/2009 6:37PM

I know you can kick your buttt! You are focused! DO IT! Report Inappropriate Comment

FITGIRL15 1/13/2009 5:21PM

Mmm... Lindt Chocolates are good chocolate.. did you eat 'em? or did looking at them they just make you hungry? LOL I think one has between 60 and 80 calories! That's a bit high for something with bare minimum nutritional value. I often have to remind myself of these numbers!!! (I'm a numbers geek, remember! LOL) What is your current calorie range? It is possible that your metabolism is messed up, or maybe you are hitting a plateau, like me! It's possible that dropping a few hundres calories per day will fix that... but mentally getting your head around the menu change isnt easy! I have been trying to make my meals smaller for at least a month, and I just can't seem to get them smaller then 300 calories each! Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/13/2009 11:34AM

Yeh-- classes are fun, but I can kick my own butt better, as well. I do challenge you to step it up a notch in the class- you can always opt for the high option and some -- I sure kicked my own butt during class- for example, I use extra risers in step, use weights in cardio kickbox and do all high in high/low-- I still do the low, but it's a higher low-- yeh, maybe that's why people "stare" at me sometimes? But, of course, be careful not to hurt yourself or just go and kick your own butt-LOL! Whatever works,right? P.S. I know this is a totally lame comment, but I'd prefer you use the word "choose not to"-- "you can't eat" sounds so restrictive-- I really do think that the "spin" makes a difference emotionally-- yeh, well, I know you're the one in control of your choices and I'm the screwed up one, so technically I should shut up and mind my own business, but it crossed my mind, so I figured I'd mention it... Great job on sticking to your plan! Report Inappropriate Comment

WITTYFLOWER 1/13/2009 9:03AM

A total clean meal day! Awesome! There is a big difference eating clean vs. eating all the processed stuff. I will try the recipe next week. I cooked some penne bake from the Eating clean magazine and it came out great. I ate it yesterday for lunch and dinner and now lunch again. Thanks for sharing your progress! Comment edited on: 1/13/2009 9:04:17 AM Report Inappropriate Comment

KJNE8O 1/13/2009 6:36AM

What is your calorie range? I love some of your foods.... Do you have your Nutrition Tracker shared? As for the cardio, I've taken classes like that and opted to just go run on the treadmill or do the elliptical instead. If the class is a hoot and just too much fun - like a Zumba class - I stick it out. But if I'm gonna work out for 2 hours I want at least 1000 calories burned! I forget - do you have a heart rate monitor? Comment edited on: 1/13/2009 6:37:08 AM Report Inappropriate Comment

ASTARB1 1/13/2009 6:30AM

How do you make a pumpkin pie smoothie?! Sounds yummy!! Report Inappropriate Comment

SWEATONCEADAY 1/12/2009 11:41PM

will you come be my chef? seriously. even if the weight isn't dropping, which i know is the ultimate goal, at the same time you are fueling your body with beautiful healthy delicious foods. you and dana are so creative in the kitchen! Report Inappropriate Comment

BRUIN2 1/12/2009 10:28PM

Still rocking those pumpkin pie smoothies!! Yay!! Report Inappropriate Comment

TMAC10 1/12/2009 9:45PM

thank you for sharing your entire days meal plan :) i'm low on the budget right now and with food but plan on getting to the grocery this weekend and doing some pre-week prep and planning. i may try again at your weekly batch meals! Report Inappropriate Comment

Mexican Lasagna & Brown Rice with Salmon and Asian Veggies

Sunday, January 11, 2009

I've had a very uneventful weekend, and I don't mind one bit! My weight had been holding steady at 141.4 for a few days, but today went up to 141.8. I'm not discouraged. I know I am doing healthy things for my body no matter what the scale says. I've been eating on plan, drinking a lot, especially decaf green tea, getting good nights' sleep and getting up early even though it's the weekend, and getting good workouts at the gym.

Yesterday I did my cooking for the upcoming week, which is making today feel all the more relaxing. (I also did my laundry yesterday too -I can be really lazy today if I want!) I made Mexican lasagna and brown rice with salmon and Asian veggies.

Mexican lasagna - I have made this before, but changed the recipe a bit this time. I boiled up a couple different kind of beans - I think I used black and red, it really doesn't matter - all beans are so healthy. Especially when you boil dry beans instead of using the canned version - there's salt in those cans. I never use canned beans anymore.

Anyway, after the beans were cooked, I added two bags of frozen pepper and onion stir fry. The peppers are all different colors. I also added cilantro, cayenne pepper, and cumin. Finally, I stirred in some fat-free cottage cheese. I had actually meant to buy fat-free sour cream and got the cottage cheese by mistake, but it ended up being a good mistake. I was reading on Smurfette's blog yesterday about superfoods (from the Abs diet) and the only food on the list I wasn't eating - or at least, I THOUGHT I wasn't eating, was whey protein. Well, it turns out that there is whey protein in cottage cheese, so now I can check that one off my list! (I was proud that most of the items on that list were what make up most of what I eat...though I haven't been eating berries lately ever since I switched over from berry smoothies to pumpkin ones. I never liked the berry seeds in the smoothies.)

Anyway. I coated a casserole dish with some extra-virgin olive oil and laid down a whole weat lavash roll-up. I bought these because I couldn't find any good whole wheat tortillas - they all had "enriched flour" in the ingredients and I think that means they only used a little whole wheat but also used white wheat. This Lavash stuff I bought...it's flat bread meant for wraps, but it just happened to fit perfectly into my casserole dish - almost exactly the same size rectangles. So I layered them with the bean/veggie/cottage cheese mixture, and then sprinkled a little fat-free cheddar on top of each layer. I baked for 30 minutes. Can't wait to eat it!

The brown rice with salmon and Asian veggies is pretty straightforward. The Asian veggies I used were two bags of frozen Oriental Stir Fry veggies (broccoli, carrot, etc...) and a can each of water chestnuts, baby corn, and straw mushrooms (each rinsed to remove some of the sodium). The only other thing I added was some ground ginger.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITGIRL15 1/12/2009 4:42PM

Sounds yummy! Luckily I read this log while eating lunch :) Report Inappropriate Comment

CAROL_HOORAH 1/12/2009 1:11PM

You have made me so, so, SOOO hungry. And you and I are TOTALLY on the same wavelength with food!!! I rinse things too to get the sodium off... even when it's like, maple syrup and beans which my bf loves I split half of it up and rinse half then remix it together and he doesn't notice the difference but I halve the salt intake. Anyway, I LOVE LOVE LOVE what you made and I want some of your mexican lasagna right now!!!! Report Inappropriate Comment

MARLIE13 1/12/2009 10:37AM

Sounds like that prep work has set you up for a very successful week. Cool beans! (Dry beans...not canned! lol!) That Mexican Lasagna sounds yummy. How much is a serving and what have you figured out the calories to be per each? Have a great week! Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/12/2009 9:50AM

Sounds like an accomplished week-end! Thanks for sharing your recipes-- Mexican anything isn't really my thing, but I do love salmon and simple meals! Happy Monday girl and enjoy this week's meals! Bon Appetit! Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/12/2009 6:14AM

Your healthy eating is inspiring! Report Inappropriate Comment

CREATINGMYSELF 1/12/2009 12:59AM

I'll have to try this out. I have been thinking of food prepping on the weekends and making use of all of my tupperware. Report Inappropriate Comment

STEPHJOGO 1/12/2009 12:39AM

Sounds tasty! Hope you have a wonderful week! Report Inappropriate Comment

KJNE8O 1/11/2009 9:20PM

Let us know how the Mexican Lasagna is - I LOVE MExican food! :) Report Inappropriate Comment

HOPERY 1/11/2009 7:45PM

Sounds quite tasty! Report Inappropriate Comment

BRUIN2 1/11/2009 1:47PM

Yay for such a good, low-key weekend! I always put cottage cheese in our lasagne!! mmm, mmm good! And spinach too!! Yum! Happy Sunday! Report Inappropriate Comment

Oddly Enough, I Don't Have Much to Blog About

Friday, January 09, 2009

No news is good news? Usually when I'm doing well I feel like writing about it, but for the past few days I've just been humming along just fine without many big insights to share.

Eating's been going fine. I'm sticking to the plan with the adjustments I made last time I blogged. And I seem to be re-adjusted to my healthy calorie level.

Sleeping's been going fine. Such a priority. A few nights ago I had trouble falling asleep - that's the worst - when you actually put in the effort to get a full night's sleep and can't. And it wasn't caffeine's fault either - I've only been drinking regular coffee very early in the morning and decaf late in the morning lately - none in the p.m. hours. But for the most part, I've been getting great sleep lately.

Exercise has been going fine. I am in a Saturday-Monday-Wednesday pattern for Body Pump. My cardio lately's been on machines - elliptical, treadmill, or the stair stepper that looks like an escalator. I've been doing mostly 45-65 minutes of cardio per day.

My weight went down to 140.0 yesterday, but bounced back up to 141.4 today for no discernable reason. Seeing how I was 134 before I fell off the wagon for the holiday season, I have a ways to go to get back. I have no doubt in my ability to do so, but it's going to happen slowly. I'm okay with that, but if I can get there or pretty close by vacation time - I leave for the Dominican Republic on Feb. 16 - I will be very grateful to mother nature. ;) That would require me to lose seven pounds in five and a half weeks.

Hmm. I guess I do have an insight afterall. The last time I blogged, I wrote that I was feeling shaky about my ability to stay on the wagon. Just now, I wrote that I have no doubt that I will. It's nice how a few days' worth of momentum increases my confidence. :)

Lastly, here's a picture of me from mid-December 2008, right before I fell off the wagon. I was feeling thin, so I wore all tight clothes - size 3 jeans and a small top. I look at this picture now, with all this extra weight, and my reaction is that I was looking okay, but would still ultimately like thinner thighs!



According to my weight report, I weighed 136 pounds the morning this photo was taken (though I had just eaten birthday cake...). My weight was fluctuating between 134-137 or so.

  

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CREATINGMYSELF 1/11/2009 12:34AM

You are doing so well-- I like how you are trying to make positive changes and stick to healthy habits. You do a really good job at holding yourself accountable. We will always find parts of ourselves that we wish were smaller. I found a pic of myself trying on prom dresses in high school. Literally, in the changing room-- I had my friend taking pics so I had an image outside of a mirror to look at and compare. Anyway, I was roughly 140 lbs and I am 5'7". I distinctly remember that the dress was a size 7-- the smallest I ever was. I look FABULOUS in the pic, but yet I remember thinking at the time "I can't go to prom-- I'm a cow!! My hips are too wide, my butt is too big and nothing looks good!!" Now, I see that pic, and I want to cry. Because here I am, roughly 60 lbs heavier, and I am thinking those same thoughts. Point to my story is, no matter what, we will never be truly happy until we learn to accept ourselves. You are so small, and the roughly 5 lbs you are battling right now shouldn't consume you. You are in excellent shape and you take good care of your body. Just keep these things in mind anytime you think your thighs are too big :) Report Inappropriate Comment

SEEHOLZ 1/10/2009 4:27PM

It's good to hear you're doing great! Man-- what a relief! I personally like your "skinny" picture, but can relate to your desire to have "thinner thighs"--- I know you'll get whatever thighs you want- you have what it takes. Just remember to do be happy with yourself! If you felt skinny that day, do not allow anything in that pretty head of yours to tell you any different! That nagging voice is the one that will always find the "flaw", because it's that voice that keep only looking at the flaws! So, start feeling the gorgeous self that you already are and take anything additional as bonus! Report Inappropriate Comment

JENNIFERBH 1/10/2009 11:32AM

I find that weighing myself more than once a week is a moral killer. For me anyway. I would weigh on Monday morning. Work hard all week. Weigh on Friday and see 5lbs lost. Then, I would weigh again on the following Monday and only see 2lbs. It was so heartbreaking. This time, as I have been up and down in weight for the last five years, I am weighing myself once a week. No excuses. That way, I only have a possiblity of getting my heart broken once a week. I am hoping this works for me. I got back on the wagon last Monday. So, I get on the scale this comimg Monday. By the way, you look great in this picture!! Don't be so hard on yourself. Jennifer Report Inappropriate Comment

SKYFYRE 1/10/2009 10:45AM

You can do it! I have no doubt, you momentum is building, not fading! Report Inappropriate Comment

ASTARB1 1/10/2009 8:06AM

I agree with FitGirl and LilTrouble... Keep doing what you're doing and shake things up if you get bored! Report Inappropriate Comment

FITGIRL15 1/10/2009 12:11AM

You are back on the wagon, consistency is key! Just keep with it, and I know you'll find your groove and surpass that all time low :) (even if I think you looked great at 134-137!) I too feel your discomfort with the few extra pounds of "fluff" (as I like to refer to my body fat! lol) I let myself eat whatever I wanted over Christmas and gained about 4 pounds. 4 pounds isn't much, but when you are so in tune with your body you really do feel different with such a smalll gain! It's cooming off slowly but surely... as I up my cardio level to almost 200% of what I was doing pre-Christmas, I'm sure I'll make short work of them! :) I hope they take friends with them when they leave! hehehe Have a GREAT weekend! Comment edited on: 1/10/2009 12:12:44 AM Report Inappropriate Comment

LILTROUBLE 1/9/2009 10:10PM

Just keep chugging along. You can do this! Do you find that weighing each day works for you? I get in a funk and am like scared of the scale. :( I love that picture. You look great - that color shirt is terrific. And your granny is adorable. Report Inappropriate Comment