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Yo-Yo Master (NOT a title I want, but it fits)

Saturday, December 27, 2008

I don't want to yo-yo! I know what it would take to avoid doing it - staying on top of my choices at all times. There have been so many events where I was able to stay in control even when having some dessert or whatever, and I'd gain a couple pounds, but they'd come right back off, and I didn't even consider those events as going off plan. I was proud of myself.

This holiday binge was different. I knew I was off track when I was going back for seconds and thirds, when I was eating beyond the point of comfortably satisfied, or even full, and getting to a point where I just felt disgusting. I knew I was off track when the crazy eating didn't stop at a party and it would continue when I got home, searching the cabinets (and getting mad because everything in my cabinets is healthy, ha) for more to eat even though I wasn't at all hungry. When I bought ice cream and ate it all in one sitting. When I kept fabricating excuses to leave my classroom and go to the teacher's room because there were sugary "goodies" (they should really call them "baddies") in there. A flip had been switched, and I was living under a whole different philosophy - the mentality of "this stuff tastes good and I want MORE!!!!" So different from "I love and respect my body and am proud that the way I look, the way I feel, and the things my body can do reflect the dedication I have had to a healthy lifestyle." OPPOSITE mentalities, both within the same mind. What is up with me?!?!??!

Yesterday we did lots of cleaning up - took the tags off our new clothes and put them away... OMG one of my new shirts from Jess' mom is a black Nike turtleneck that is a moisture-wicking fabric, like a spandexy shiny material on the outside and SOFT FLEECE on the inside and so warm and will be so wonderful for skiing!!!!!!! Okay, that was a tangent. We also stored away all the gift bags we'd received to re-use next year and don't deny that you totally re-use the gift bags too! Haha. I was on track and the whole time we were cleaning I was sipping green tea, and slowly grazing on my breakfast.

At the gym yesterday I did my old arms & shoulders routine, followed by the elliptical for 65 minutes including the 5-minute cooldown. It was a very good elliptical workout and I completed 10K in 58:22. By the time the whole thing was done I was over the 1,000 calorie burned mark.

After that I did my full stretching and ab routine, so in all I was at the gym about 110 minutes. :)

Next I packed up two days' worth of food and got all dolled up and we headed into the city to meet up with a few friends. I skipped three of my planned snacks - an apple, yogurt, and half-cup of oatmeal - a total of 300 calories of snacks - and instead I had a cinnamon dolce skinny latte from Starbucks..........ohhhhh my, and at the bar I had a Captain and diet, and then probably about 21 oz of Bud Lite (I was sharing beers with my boyfriend). I just did the time with my tracker and the drinks totaled 400 calories, so my grand total for the day was 2,201 calories, which is slightly over my calorie range (1,820-2,170 but I almost never go for the low end of that range!). I also drank lots of water...even had a bottle waiting for me for after the bar.

So.........this morning I was down SIX POUNDS from yesterday. From 147.8 to 141.8. No joke, 6.0 pounds in one day. Which is why I am now calling myself the Yo-Yo Master, which now that I think about it sounds like a character from Star Wars. Haha. We were going to go for a walk today in a conservatory we only recently discovered near Jess' (who knew...from inner city to woodsy trails in a ten-minute walk) but it's raining! So we're off to a gym soon...there are a couple in our chain of gyms we can choose from, and we haven't chosen yet.

Oh yeah! This blog entry is getting long now, but I meant to start blog-planning today for a food plan for the upcoming week. Thanks to taking Christmas day off from my own cooking, I have enough of my batch-cooked meals to last me through Monday. But we are going skiing in New Hampshire on Monday and Tuesday, so I'm a bit unsure about how to plan my eating. We're going with Jess' family, and staying at a bed and breakfast, so chances are we'll all go to a restaurant Monday night, though I'm not sure.

I think this should be my plan:

*Saturday: stick with eating plan (already decided and ready to go)
*Sunday: ditto Saturday's plan
*Monday: Plan for a healthy dinner at a restaurant, aiming for about 900 calories. Determine whether we're doing a full or half-day of skiing on Monday (probably half) and figure out whether I need to eat extra calories for that many hours of exercise. Once I have a total calorie target, subtract 900 for dinner, then plan the rest using my own food including what I've already made.
*Tuesday: Do my own food all day. Ditto Monday for the calorie range based on hours of exercise.
*Wednesday (and the rest of the week): Have a plan prepared before leaving for skiing. This will mean having a grocery list and going shopping and cooking TOMORROW. I should plan on batch-cooking for Tuesday through Sunday - six days. Then next weekend I will be preparing for a regular work week, so it'll be totally back to the usual routine. And I know I do SO MUCH BETTER when I'm following a usual routine.

And remember........SEVEN WEEKS UNTIL BIKINI ON CARRIBBEAN BEACH!!!!!!!!!!!!! STAY ON TRACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

LYNN248 1/3/2009 9:02AM

    THis is me.. only i didn't drop 6 lbs as soon as i started eating good, which was yesterday lol, actually i'll check...NOPE stayed exactly the same even if i did a 140 min cardio session on Jan1 and a 60 min session last night, still nothing.

I think now that you've been so used to eating good, the temporary insanity we all faced at xmas, will come off YOU really quickly. Me.. not so much, i bet it's a month before i drop those 5 lbs.

After the holidays i walked through the grocery store asking myself "what dont I ever get to eat", i was in search of "bad" food, anything i never allowed myself . I got a few things, bread and dips and peanut butter ice cream with little bits of chocolate in it. Ate it for breakfast two days, lunch one day and then decided to chuck it on the 1st before i finished the entire thing, and trust me, there was but a bowl left.

It's back on track now, and it's all about the beach.

Now i'm worried about my goal to workout and eat well while on holidays.

will you?

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TERRIANGEL 12/30/2008 9:32PM

    Oh, yeah. Totally reuse gift bags. What a waste if we don't! :)

6 lbs in a day is quite the accomplishment, madam! I don't even think I've ever lost THAT much. I've done 4, but never 6. emoticon Our bodies are freaks of nature. :) And I LOVE the yo-yo master Star Wars Character idea. My son would love it!! BIG Star Wars fan, he is. :)

Where are you skiing?? I just got back from New Hampshire. Was there from the 26th to today (30th). We hit Cranmore, Attitash and King Pine today and drove home from there. It was AWESOME! But alas, I ate enough fried food and sweet stuff while i was gone to overcompensate for the hours of skiing 10X over. BLECH!

I'm actually really EXCITED to start eating healthy again. I was thinking on the drive home this evening about all the grease and cheese and sugar I piled into this bod that was starting to really get used to fruit and veggies and whole foods. No WONDER all the lumps and bumps are making a re-appearance!

So, I'll be like you and commit to a new plan tomorrow. But for now, it's off to bed.

Happy Almost New Years Eve!


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BLUEBOOEYES 12/29/2008 10:33PM

    The Holidays messes everyone over, even the most focused and determined of minds. Just get back to your routine and you'll be totally rockin' that bikini! It's almost nice to know that even my "Spark Idols" have they're off times. Haha. Yes, I just called you a Spark Idol. Embrace it. Haha.

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SEEHOLZ 12/28/2008 8:20PM

    Welcome to the gift re-using club-LOL! I think it would be fun to inital the bags in tiny letters on the bottom, so you could see how many times it was re-used-LOL
Your ski trip sounds lovely--- as for yo yo master. It sounds to me like you are a |"plan" master, so no room for any yo-yo.. as for your weight gain- you already know that most of it was water weight-but I so get it!

Enjoy yourself and do what's good for you while keeping the principles of moderation right at your fingertips. If anyone can be in control and on track, it's so you!

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SKYFYRE 12/28/2008 9:16AM

    I am sensing a GREEN Susan! Yay! Yep, me too with the bags! Um, and Yay for planning out the week to stay on track! Your not a yoyo, you just over did some salt I think after all that yummyness, and then the beed helped you diurese!

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RUNNERMOMTO3 12/27/2008 11:21PM

    Its great you've got a plan and it is all written down!! You did what you did and you can't control the past, you can though control the future and it looks like you are taking back control of it!! Good for you. And yes, I recycle those bags too!! some of those are REALLY nice bags!!

Comment edited on: 12/27/2008 11:22:13 PM

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ASTARB1 12/27/2008 10:55PM

    I loved this blog - it was like reading a page from my own life. I've, too, gone through periods where a flip had been switched, just like you described...where I've not only felt out of control, but I didn't want to regain control! I can completely empathize.

The fact that you've blogged about your experience and that you have a game plan for the next few days is great. Keep your eyes on the prize! You can do it!!

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TRACYZABELLE 12/27/2008 3:59PM

    What a better reason to get back in shape but for a bikiini vacation! Sounds awesome! I am home this week and I will be straightening up and getting back on track! Good luck dropping the rest of your holiday weight!

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WITTYFLOWER 12/27/2008 1:55PM

    I admit it...yes, I recycle those gift bags and they do come in handy when I am in a hurry before going to a party. Just grab the appropriate gift bad along with some tissue papers that I have on-hand and off I go. Perfect! LOL. I like that idea about cooking for the whole week. I understand you about routine. I am like that too. We are off one more week. When I am at work, I have some healthy food stashed in my little refrigerator, so it helps. Great Job on the workout!! Wow!!! Do you find that the more you workout the more you get to eat?

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STEPHANON 12/27/2008 1:27PM

    Wow! 6 pounds overnight is something - but it proves that you didn't put on much real fat because of your binge, but likely water weight and that icky few pounds of bloat that appears after a binge and disappears once you get on track. The nice thing about your excessive eating is that you didn't allow it to drag on too long. You had a little time where you just went crazy (in the season where it's almost to be expected) and now you've gotten yourself back in line with exercise and healthy eating. That's NOT being a yo-yo master! That's just living life. I know those pounds are going to come off quick - you're totally in control now, you are doing great with your routine, and you're going to be smokin' hot in that bikini in a few weeks. Keep up the great work!

Comment edited on: 12/27/2008 1:31:16 PM

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BRUIN2 12/27/2008 1:08PM

    Yay! (For your routine-y ways - not for the Christmas-food-craziness, hehehehe)

And I totally re-use gift bags too - doesn't everyone?!?!? Who would throw out a perfectly good gift bag?!?!?!

Skiing will be a blast!! Are you planning on taking along your own snacks?!? Have fun!!

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Getting the Upper Hand Back

Friday, December 26, 2008

Here I am as Rudolph, singing Christmas carols with Jess and one of his many aunts. I'm actually thrilled that I don't look overly chunky in this photo. emoticon

I slept over at Jess' parents' house on Christmas eve and didn't weigh in on Christmas day (relief), but I did weigh in today and was totally expecting to see something in the 150s, so I was shocked to see I'd actually LOST weight since my last weigh-in on Wednesday - 147.8. So the holidays set me back 13 pounds, but I'm already back on track. I don't know why I always have the mentality that being on/off track has to go by a full day. It's as if I think I can only have a good weight management day if I weigh myself in the morning and then eat right all day. The moment I decide I'll eat something that's not part of the plan, I decide it's an off-the-wagon day and I just keep on eating junk for the rest of the day. I thought I was over that mentality. I thought I was over all of this actually - I thought I was done with weight spikes, pigging out, eating until disgustingly full. I thought I'd figured it all out. Now I know it is a constant battle. I was winning the battle for many months there, but for the past couple weeks the unhealthy habits have been winning. But now I have the upper hand back.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RA4945 12/27/2008 1:04AM

    I'm right there with you girl. I feel yucky about the way I've been eating and treating my body. We WILL get back on track though. I know that for sure! And you look terrific in that photo!!!

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FITGIRL15 12/26/2008 11:37PM

    You definitely don't look chunky AT ALL in that photo... you crazy, girl!!! You look awesome and like you are enjoying yourself SO MUCH!!!! (Check out that BIG smile and that red nose! LOL)
The scale just isn't telling you what you want to hear right now but that does not change the fact that you have made some amazing progress and improvements to your lifestyle! I agree, this living healthy is definitely a constant concious battle... but if you are aware of it and have faith in your abilities, you know that you will get back to where you were plus more in the New Year!

You are a machine, Susan!!! You Go, Girl!!!

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MIMISCA 12/26/2008 11:29PM

    congrats for getting back that upper hand! and you look adorable in that pic! love it!

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SWEATONCEADAY 12/26/2008 9:42PM

    i am very much like that too. all or nothing. even if that all is bad. you look great. even with a red nose!

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ASTARB1 12/26/2008 6:31PM

    You look great to me!!! :)

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TRACYZABELLE 12/26/2008 5:25PM

    Yesterday is gone today is a new day! You can and will do it sweetie! I ahve faith in you!

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SKYFYRE 12/26/2008 5:08PM

    You said it it is a daily battle! But, you are winning it!
PS... Cute Rudolph!

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WITTYFLOWER 12/26/2008 3:32PM

    It is a daily thing and you look great!!

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BRUIN2 12/26/2008 1:51PM

    Teehee - aren't you just the cutest reindeer ever?!?!?

I think you're right - this is "constant"...we have to make the decisions that will get us where we want to be....luckily you KNOW how to do just that!!! YAY!!!

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PAMELA984 12/26/2008 1:40PM

    That is the right attitude! Being healthy and fit isn't an "all or nothing" proposition. Some of us will battle our weight all of our lives - but eating healthy foods and exercising shift the odds in our favor!

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What a Lovely Day!

Thursday, December 25, 2008

I think I should probably say I'm now a Jewish girl who officially celebrates Christmas, because I certainly had a wonderful day today! I really have very little to report that's health/fitness related, except that I managed a half hour run/walk today...mostly last night and today was one big foodfest, but I will most definitely be getting back on track now that the craziness is mostly over...regular life routine doesn't start again until Jan. 5, though, and there will be plenty of time/temptation between now and then, most notably during our ski trip Mon-Tues. But nothing like the barrage (sp?) of cookies, cakes, pies, and candy that I've been around nonstop lately. If I'm mostly on track for my week and a half off, and have some nice hearty but somewhat healthy restaurant meals while we're away skiing (which is nonstop exercise, afterall), I'll be okay.

Last night and today was really more about the people than the food. The children who were newborn infants last Christmas who were running around and laughing last night at Jess' Grammy's house. The cousin and his girlfriend who announced their engagement this evening. (I was so happy for them - but man did it hurt that I didn't have my own engagement to announce..........Jess and I have been dating longer than all these engaged couples and even longer than some of the married ones with kids!) My parents, who came to their first ever Christmas mother was so touched to be invited that she got teary, and she brought a menorah, and my dad brought his trombone to play along with the Christmas carols. It was all just SO lovely.

Oh, and I got such wonderful presents... I wasn't even expecting any presents, because Jess' parents are taking the whole family on that ski trip as our present. So I was SO surprised to get a gorgeous warm fleece jacket and several other outdoorsy/active type clothes, plus so many other things....really cute kitchen towels with apples on them, earmuffs that play the radio and can hook up to an iPod, shampoos and lotions.........sooooooooo much stuff! I am overwhelmed by it all and by how generously Jess' family has accepted me and made me feel like I could be a part of their Christmas tradition. I am just filled with happy, warm, cozy loving feelings right now - AND more sugar than I probably ate from July to November! Ha!!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEEHOLZ 12/26/2008 8:33AM

    Engaged or not, Jess' family seems to think that you are part of them!!!
I am sooo happy to hear that your Christmas was fabulous and embraced all that's important in life!!! It sure sounds like you guys got to experience the true meaning of Christmas!!!

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TRACYZABELLE 12/26/2008 4:27AM

    Congrats on celebrating Christmas! I am Jewish by birth but never was brought up with the traditions.But I tell my daughter about the traditions even though I never celebrated any of them until I was an adult. I am so happy for you that you had a wonderful family experience and that your folks also joined you, how awesome!

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BRUIN2 12/25/2008 11:23PM


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Feeling hopeful

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Wow. When I fall, I fall hard. I have been acting like a totally different person the past few days, and it is not who I am or want to be. I am puffy all over now and everyone who sees me tonight and tomorrow during holiday celebrations will undoubtedly notice the difference - most of them saw me just a few weeks ago and had so many sweet comments on how great I was looking.

When I logged into SparkPeople today I noticed the featured article was about a 30-minute holiday workout. I clicked on it and it looked like just what I needed - a full-body quick strength training routine. I did the whole thing, plus a five-minute warmup, five-minute cooldown, and a few extra upper-body exercises with dumbbells. In all I did about 40 minutes. Now I feel more energized...I feel like the blood is flowing through me better, I feel warm, and most importantly, I feel like I am NOT the sloth I've been acting like lately.

I won't make any promises about how I eat tonight and tomorrow during holiday celebrations. I will set a guideline that there will be no eating so much that people notice and comment to each other later about how piggy I was being, but I'm not going to be super strict.

I am REALLY looking forward to a fresh start when the holidays are over. I am going to give my healthy lifestle the full attention it deserves, and I am going to feel and look much better, I just know it.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

TRACYZABELLE 12/26/2008 4:24AM

    I know you can snap out of it and get back on track, you are an awesome individual! YOU Can do it!

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FITGIRL15 12/25/2008 7:00PM

    Have a wonderful time this holiday season! Getting that workout in was a great idea! You inspired me to get out and go cross-country skiing the other day! It was AWESOME... so thank you!!!

I am with you... I have not been my usual health food eater lately! I know this is all gonna change in January so I'm just doing my best to try not to get sick from over eating or eating those foods that make my stomach upset! So far so good!

emoticon emoticon emoticon
Merry Christmas, Susan!

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    I know you will do amazingly. I think as long as you follow your guidelines, you will eat correctly and enjoy yourself. Don't worry about people thinking and saying that you look different than you did the last time they saw you. They are all people who care about you and would rather you enjoy yourself and have fun than be insecure around them. The holidays are the toughest times to get through, so even if you have a few extra pounds by the end of them as long as you keep your head up and make it worth it, they will be a success.

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BRUIN2 12/24/2008 1:42PM

    Yay for a workout!

Great guidelines for yourself today and tomorrow - I'm planning on the same sort of thing...

Can't wait for all of this food to be gone so things can get back to normal!

Have a blast with the family!!!

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JLITT62 12/24/2008 1:26PM

    People are rarely so hard on us as we are. Good for you for getting in your exercise! It's so important, especially when your eating hasn't been the best.

It can be hard, but you can eat well, even through the holidays. I think conscious eating is one of the keys -- if you want that chocolate cake, and you really enjoy it, that's fine, whether it's dinner or breakfast, to my mind. But the minute you feel you have to sneak it, well, you know there's something going on other than true hunger. Believe me, I've had plenty of days when I'd do something like that, but now I know it wouldn't fuel my day. Plus I know I do better holding off on the treats until at least the afternoon.

The trick is finding what works for you!

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ZIRCADIA 12/24/2008 1:09PM

    I'm glad you got some activity in!! :) I always seem to eat better when I'm active -- which is why I try very hard to keep some workouts going when I'm on vacation and over the weekends to remind my body that I want to be healthy.

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Where'd my wagon go?

Monday, December 22, 2008

This is the chocolate cake I polished off for breakfast yesterday:

Today I succumbed to every banana bread, cookie, and marble cake slice I encountered. Then I fell into a food coma on my couch after school and napped for hours. I am such a sloth. This is so not me.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RA4945 12/23/2008 2:23PM

    YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! I am so with you on this eating extravaganza! It seems that I deny myself NOTHING these days! I want to get back on track but I just keep getting sidetracked. But I know this, WE WILL get back on track. Let's get through this wonderful Christmas holiday and new years and enjoy every minute of it. Lets quit punishing ourselves and move on knowing that we have the WILL and the WAY to get back. We will get there!!
PS,You look lovely and oh so thin in that picture!!!

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SWEATONCEADAY 12/23/2008 11:19AM

    i am sick with the slug baby disease too. emoticon i am going to the doc this morning and will see if he knows a cure.

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SEEHOLZ 12/23/2008 9:59AM

    I am not the one to speak sweetie! I am sending you a huge hug -- food comas stink!
Sometimes what helps me is to open your page and read the title....
"Every Moment is a New Chance to Make the Right Choice" !!!

No matter what, no beating up allowed- just moving on....
Enjoy your holidays and focus on the people!

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PAMELA984 12/23/2008 6:42AM

    It is okay - just pick yourself up and get out of that food coma today. Move around - that will help - and try and control the amount of sugar you get today.

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TRACYZABELLE 12/23/2008 12:50AM

    Snap out of it girl! As hard as you worked you c an not fall into that trap ! You are my hero.. if my hero fails where does that leave me?? C'mon SUsan-- you are an active, awesome, athletic woman...step awy from the crap and get running --- away from it as soon and as fast as possible!

I have faith in you!


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FITGIRL15 12/22/2008 11:42PM

    I love it! That cake looks DAMN TASTY!!!!!
You work hard and deserve a few days like this to keep you sane!

By the way, you look great in the photo!

Hope you are ready for Christmas :)

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THIRTEENREASONS 12/22/2008 10:24PM

    Tisk tisk!!!

I haven't been around for a few days and this is what I come to see?! Haha

It's the holiday season so you are not alone, my friend. We'll all feel better once we get back to our healthy eating habits.

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ZIRCADIA 12/22/2008 9:53PM

    SNAP OUT OF IT, GIRL!!! :) You will feel so much better when you're eating your healthy food again. No food comas come from eating clean. :) (This is some tough love!!!! I know you secretly want it and not a comment going, oh it's ok, just eat some more cookies until you're done with it and move on... you know?)

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BRUIN2 12/22/2008 9:12PM

    It's the emoticon (slug baby) virus.

I'm hoping that it's only around until Dec.26. Whatcha think?!

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ASTARB1 12/22/2008 8:33PM

    Maybe you can try to figure out what's at the root of your snacking: are you sleeping well/enough? Are you getting enough nutrients? Are you bored / depressed? Could it be hormonal? For most of us, this kind of eating is not even remotely related to true hunger. If you can figure out what's really going on, you can do something about it. (Besides sheer will - which ... bah! ... never works).

By the way, I need to take this advice myself. I'm also having one of *those* days!

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TERRIANGEL 12/22/2008 8:32PM

    OMG you are too funny.

That's life, honey. You're doing fabulous. A few days here and there aren't gonna kill anyone, and in fact it's life. Your "norm" is to eat well and work out like a fiend. Everyone gets a break now and again, so worry not. :)

Happy Belated Birthday, by the way!!!

No ring yet, I take it? emoticon

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