Saturday, December 27, 2008
I don't want to yo-yo! I know what it would take to avoid doing it - staying on top of my choices at all times. There have been so many events where I was able to stay in control even when having some dessert or whatever, and I'd gain a couple pounds, but they'd come right back off, and I didn't even consider those events as going off plan. I was proud of myself.
This holiday binge was different. I knew I was off track when I was going back for seconds and thirds, when I was eating beyond the point of comfortably satisfied, or even full, and getting to a point where I just felt disgusting. I knew I was off track when the crazy eating didn't stop at a party and it would continue when I got home, searching the cabinets (and getting mad because everything in my cabinets is healthy, ha) for more to eat even though I wasn't at all hungry. When I bought ice cream and ate it all in one sitting. When I kept fabricating excuses to leave my classroom and go to the teacher's room because there were sugary "goodies" (they should really call them "baddies") in there. A flip had been switched, and I was living under a whole different philosophy - the mentality of "this stuff tastes good and I want MORE!!!!" So different from "I love and respect my body and am proud that the way I look, the way I feel, and the things my body can do reflect the dedication I have had to a healthy lifestyle." OPPOSITE mentalities, both within the same mind. What is up with me?!?!??!
Yesterday we did lots of cleaning up - took the tags off our new clothes and put them away... OMG one of my new shirts from Jess' mom is a black Nike turtleneck that is a moisture-wicking fabric, like a spandexy shiny material on the outside and SOFT FLEECE on the inside and so warm and will be so wonderful for skiing!!!!!!! Okay, that was a tangent. We also stored away all the gift bags we'd received to re-use next year and don't deny that you totally re-use the gift bags too! Haha. I was on track and the whole time we were cleaning I was sipping green tea, and slowly grazing on my breakfast.
At the gym yesterday I did my old arms & shoulders routine, followed by the elliptical for 65 minutes including the 5-minute cooldown. It was a very good elliptical workout and I completed 10K in 58:22. By the time the whole thing was done I was over the 1,000 calorie burned mark.
After that I did my full stretching and ab routine, so in all I was at the gym about 110 minutes. :)
Next I packed up two days' worth of food and got all dolled up and we headed into the city to meet up with a few friends. I skipped three of my planned snacks - an apple, yogurt, and half-cup of oatmeal - a total of 300 calories of snacks - and instead I had a cinnamon dolce skinny latte from Starbucks..........ohhhhh my, and at the bar I had a Captain and diet, and then probably about 21 oz of Bud Lite (I was sharing beers with my boyfriend). I just did the time with my tracker and the drinks totaled 400 calories, so my grand total for the day was 2,201 calories, which is slightly over my calorie range (1,820-2,170 but I almost never go for the low end of that range!). I also drank lots of water...even had a bottle waiting for me for after the bar.
So.........this morning I was down SIX POUNDS from yesterday. From 147.8 to 141.8. No joke, 6.0 pounds in one day. Which is why I am now calling myself the Yo-Yo Master, which now that I think about it sounds like a character from Star Wars. Haha. We were going to go for a walk today in a conservatory we only recently discovered near Jess' (who knew...from inner city to woodsy trails in a ten-minute walk) but it's raining! So we're off to a gym soon...there are a couple in our chain of gyms we can choose from, and we haven't chosen yet.
Oh yeah! This blog entry is getting long now, but I meant to start blog-planning today for a food plan for the upcoming week. Thanks to taking Christmas day off from my own cooking, I have enough of my batch-cooked meals to last me through Monday. But we are going skiing in New Hampshire on Monday and Tuesday, so I'm a bit unsure about how to plan my eating. We're going with Jess' family, and staying at a bed and breakfast, so chances are we'll all go to a restaurant Monday night, though I'm not sure.
I think this should be my plan:
*Saturday: stick with eating plan (already decided and ready to go)
*Sunday: ditto Saturday's plan
*Monday: Plan for a healthy dinner at a restaurant, aiming for about 900 calories. Determine whether we're doing a full or half-day of skiing on Monday (probably half) and figure out whether I need to eat extra calories for that many hours of exercise. Once I have a total calorie target, subtract 900 for dinner, then plan the rest using my own food including what I've already made.
*Tuesday: Do my own food all day. Ditto Monday for the calorie range based on hours of exercise.
*Wednesday (and the rest of the week): Have a plan prepared before leaving for skiing. This will mean having a grocery list and going shopping and cooking TOMORROW. I should plan on batch-cooking for Tuesday through Sunday - six days. Then next weekend I will be preparing for a regular work week, so it'll be totally back to the usual routine. And I know I do SO MUCH BETTER when I'm following a usual routine.
And remember........SEVEN WEEKS UNTIL BIKINI ON CARRIBBEAN BEACH!!!!!!!!!!!!! STAY ON TRACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, December 26, 2008
Here I am as Rudolph, singing Christmas carols with Jess and one of his many aunts. I'm actually thrilled that I don't look overly chunky in this photo.
I slept over at Jess' parents' house on Christmas eve and didn't weigh in on Christmas day (relief), but I did weigh in today and was totally expecting to see something in the 150s, so I was shocked to see I'd actually LOST weight since my last weigh-in on Wednesday - 147.8. So the holidays set me back 13 pounds, but I'm already back on track. I don't know why I always have the mentality that being on/off track has to go by a full day. It's as if I think I can only have a good weight management day if I weigh myself in the morning and then eat right all day. The moment I decide I'll eat something that's not part of the plan, I decide it's an off-the-wagon day and I just keep on eating junk for the rest of the day. I thought I was over that mentality. I thought I was over all of this actually - I thought I was done with weight spikes, pigging out, eating until disgustingly full. I thought I'd figured it all out. Now I know it is a constant battle. I was winning the battle for many months there, but for the past couple weeks the unhealthy habits have been winning. But now I have the upper hand back.
Thursday, December 25, 2008
I think I should probably say I'm now a Jewish girl who officially celebrates Christmas, because I certainly had a wonderful day today! I really have very little to report that's health/fitness related, except that I managed a half hour run/walk today...mostly last night and today was one big foodfest, but I will most definitely be getting back on track now that the craziness is mostly over...regular life routine doesn't start again until Jan. 5, though, and there will be plenty of time/temptation between now and then, most notably during our ski trip Mon-Tues. But nothing like the barrage (sp?) of cookies, cakes, pies, and candy that I've been around nonstop lately. If I'm mostly on track for my week and a half off, and have some nice hearty but somewhat healthy restaurant meals while we're away skiing (which is nonstop exercise, afterall), I'll be okay.
Last night and today was really more about the people than the food. The children who were newborn infants last Christmas who were running around and laughing last night at Jess' Grammy's house. The cousin and his girlfriend who announced their engagement this evening. (I was so happy for them - but man did it hurt that I didn't have my own engagement to announce..........Jess and I have been dating longer than all these engaged couples and even longer than some of the married ones with kids!) My parents, who came to their first ever Christmas party...my mother was so touched to be invited that she got teary, and she brought a menorah, and my dad brought his trombone to play along with the Christmas carols. It was all just SO lovely.
Oh, and I got such wonderful presents... I wasn't even expecting any presents, because Jess' parents are taking the whole family on that ski trip as our present. So I was SO surprised to get a gorgeous warm fleece jacket and several other outdoorsy/active type clothes, plus so many other things....really cute kitchen towels with apples on them, earmuffs that play the radio and can hook up to an iPod, shampoos and lotions.........sooooooooo much stuff! I am overwhelmed by it all and by how generously Jess' family has accepted me and made me feel like I could be a part of their Christmas tradition. I am just filled with happy, warm, cozy loving feelings right now - AND more sugar than I probably ate from July to November! Ha!!
Wednesday, December 24, 2008
Wow. When I fall, I fall hard. I have been acting like a totally different person the past few days, and it is not who I am or want to be. I am puffy all over now and everyone who sees me tonight and tomorrow during holiday celebrations will undoubtedly notice the difference - most of them saw me just a few weeks ago and had so many sweet comments on how great I was looking.
When I logged into SparkPeople today I noticed the featured article was about a 30-minute holiday workout. I clicked on it and it looked like just what I needed - a full-body quick strength training routine. I did the whole thing, plus a five-minute warmup, five-minute cooldown, and a few extra upper-body exercises with dumbbells. In all I did about 40 minutes. Now I feel more energized...I feel like the blood is flowing through me better, I feel warm, and most importantly, I feel like I am NOT the sloth I've been acting like lately.
I won't make any promises about how I eat tonight and tomorrow during holiday celebrations. I will set a guideline that there will be no eating so much that people notice and comment to each other later about how piggy I was being, but I'm not going to be super strict.
I am REALLY looking forward to a fresh start when the holidays are over. I am going to give my healthy lifestle the full attention it deserves, and I am going to feel and look much better, I just know it.
Monday, December 22, 2008
This is the chocolate cake I polished off for breakfast yesterday:
Today I succumbed to every banana bread, cookie, and marble cake slice I encountered. Then I fell into a food coma on my couch after school and napped for hours. I am such a sloth. This is so not me.
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