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SEPPIESUSAN's Recent Blog Entries

Obsessive much?

Tuesday, May 01, 2012

Nothing new to report really, but I just feel like writing. Last night I sat down and counted out all the cycles I've been recording since January 2011 and discovered that they range from 28-35 days, with the average being 30-31. I also realized I'd miscounted and yesterday was actually day 32. So I'm just in a waiting game right's a definite maybe situation!

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    and once you are pregnant and actually have a kid you won't consider this even being obsessive. just a taste of your life to come. lol

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SEEHOLZ 5/2/2012 2:40PM

    emoticon that is supposed to be crossed fingers... close enough-lol

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FITGIRL15 5/2/2012 12:02AM

    My fingers are crossed! :)

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MBSHAZZER 5/1/2012 5:56PM

    Hehe... it's your blog, this is the place to obsess!

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Big Fat Negative

Monday, April 30, 2012

I'm quickly learning the pregnancy lingo and abbreviations online. I bought an EPT test (EPT = Early Pregnancy Test) yesterday, actually a box of 2, and I took one this morning. I got a negative. It was the kind with a plus for positive and a minus for negative...and well *I* thought I could see a very faint vertical line, but my hubby couldn't. I had a wave of nausea at a meeting this morning though, and I'm now on day 33 since my last period, so...I am going crazy not knowing. You all probably already know this, but a false negative is apparently quite common this early on, so a negative doesn't really tell me anything. I am thinking I will wait to take the 2nd test on Saturday, unless TOM comes, but I am going to GO CRAZY waiting.

Please feel free to share your stories about this kind of stuff with me, if you have many months did it take for you to conceive? How soon did you test, and did you get any false negatives?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

MEGSMILEY 4/30/2012 5:15PM

    Sadly- this is all too familiar to me. It took me 2 years to get pregnant (with my second child). I am 12 weeks today! My first child, my son, was concieved on the first cycle we tried. He is 3.
With my son, I had negative tests from 8dpo (days post ovulation) all the way up to 12 dpo, when it turned positive.
With this pregnancy, I had a positive at 9dpo (so 3 days earlier). It all depends on when you ovulated and then when the embryo implanted...

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FITBECKSRN24 4/30/2012 4:05PM

    im telling you girl get a pregnant/not pregnant test!! you will drive yourself crazy otherwise.... i tested at 35 and got PREGNANT reading within a min. i also never had any symptoms i was pregnant until i hit 6-7 weeks. good luck!

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KAYECAN 4/30/2012 4:03PM

    My advice......get outside in your yard and enjoy getting creative with your landscape. Take your mind off wondering whether or not you might be pregnant because the best thing to do right now is to just keep yourself busy and happy. In the pioneer days they didn't have quickie tests or anything.....mother nature just ran it's course and babies were born. Sometimes taking the simple route is the most rewarding. I hope life is growing today in you. You will be a great mom.
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BOOTS1221 4/30/2012 3:54PM

    Sending positive vibes!!! I'm not ttc just yet, but my best friend is and we have been through all of this for her! She has very irregular cycles so it's always hard to tell, but last month she missed her period, took tests - all BFN. It was so frustrating for her! Finally at cycle day 36 she got a BFP!!! Sadly she ended up having a chemical pregnancy and lost it, but she's gearing up to try again so I'm doing all kinds of reading with her. Keep us posted Susan!!!

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SEEHOLZ 4/30/2012 2:04PM

    No stories to share, except, I knew when my boobs got really tender-LOL!
You are going to drive yourself nuts at this rate and spend far too much money... if you just wait a couple of weeks, you'll know for sure!

Also remember that different people conceive at different rates. Btw, the 33 day thing could be a great indicator, depending on how regular your cycle is-- mine being fairly regular, I'd be nervous/excited at day 33-LOL!

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SWEATONCEADAY 4/30/2012 1:44PM

    welcome to the roller coaster. pms symptoms and pregnancy are pretty much the same which is super confusing and frustrating. it is hard cause you start thinking you are pregnant when you don't want to be and not pregnant when you want to be. crazy hormones!

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ANNIEBANANIE85 4/30/2012 1:24PM

    Sending positive vibes your way!!! :)

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FITGIRL15 4/30/2012 12:11PM

    Ohh... I have only ever peed on a ketostick! LOL
I have no advice, but am totally rooting for you! Don't worry, if it doesn't happen this month, there's always another month of trying!!! :)
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THE_NEW_MELISSA 4/30/2012 12:09PM

    Ok, here's my other tip. In my POAS psychosis, I found that if I actually peed in a disposable cup and dipped the stick, I'd get a better result, because I'd make sure to get a good sample. Sorry if that's TMI, but I figure if it helps one person, it's worth it :) Also, even if you start spotting, don't throw the towel in yet. I spotted with two of my three pregnancies and with my first pregnancy, I had what seemed like a regular period.

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MBSHAZZER 4/30/2012 11:53AM

    Susan, this will drive you crazy! Since I definitely DON'T want kids, I have been on the other side of the EPT nervousness!!! Staring at a negative and praying that didn't look like a horizonal line very faintly in the background! LOL! Good luck, either way and DON'T STRESS about it - it will happen when it happens!

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THE_NEW_MELISSA 4/30/2012 11:52AM

    When we were TTC, I went a little overboard with the testing. I do know that if you even think you see a faint line, I would retest again in a day or two. The first line I saw was so faint, I had to look at it in direct sunlight and even then it was hard to see and I was the only one that could see it :) The waiting game is a tough one! I'm sending you Postive Sticky Vibes ++++++++ :)

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What's been going on for me...

Sunday, April 29, 2012

Hi, lots to report since my last blog! First of all, last time I wrote I was concerned about my eating habits. Well, um...I'm disappointed to report that they haven't gotten much better. And I've even let exercise slide some (though I did go to the gym yesterday)... but maybe you'll see why when you see what else I have to report.

This past Tuesday my mother called me from the hospital. She had actually gone in on Monday night but knew I had to go to work and didn't want to upset me. I went right up to Lahey in Burlington to see her. She'd had something commonly called "broken heart syndrome" which is a temporary cardiac condition often caused by a traumatic event or by chronic anxiety. Part of the heart stops beating for a while. It starts off feeling and looking just like a heart attack - in fact, I guess some of the doctors even called it a heart attack. But it gets better over 1-4 weeks and patients make a full recovery. It was still scary though, of course. I visited her on Tuesday and she went home on Wednesday. But then on Friday she had to go back (well, different hospital, one closer to home for her) because of a dangerously low blood pressure. She is still there and will probably stay until tomorrow. We visited her yesterday and now we're dog-sitting. He's pretty easy to take care of, but he's been doing disgusting stuff like trying to clean his butt on my dining room rug, and rubbing his face in some dog poop he found outside! Ugh! I gave him a bath, but still, GROSS.

Oddly enough one of my closest friends ended up ALSO being admitted to Lahey, on Thursday, with a blockage between her gall bladder and liver. She needed two surgeries and was sent home yesterday!

Finally, in other, I shouldn't be sharing this stuff but I'm going to anyway news, it has now been 32 days since my last period. I can barely think about anything else (and I've kind of been too exhausted to anyway). I took a home pregnancy test this morning but it didn't work. Stupid CVS brand. There were no lines whatsoever - no pregnancy line, and nothing in the control window either. You're supposed to take tests in the morning, so I'm thinking I might buy a different brand and try again tomorrow - Monday morning before a heavy day at work, I can't even imagine what it'll be like trying to do my meetings at work after that! I wish I could find out on a weekend. Oh well. I've been obssessing over pregnancy websites all day and discovered that if I am pregnant, I'm already four weeks along(!) and due January 3, 2013! My husband has been adamant about not getting emotional about it yet, but when I told him the due date he choked up a little bit - awww... I know you're not "supposed" to tell anyone until you're like a third of the way done with pregnancy, but I cannot fathom how you keep all this stuff bottled inside when it's impossible not to obsess. Oh well. I guess I'll have some pretty definite yay or nay news soon.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

CHANGINGSAM 4/30/2012 11:38AM

    Hope your mom and friend are doing better! Good luck with the possible pregnancy!

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COWBOYMAMA 4/30/2012 10:39AM

    Praying everything turns out okay for your mom.

I have always had luck with Dollar tree tests. Keeping fingers crossed for the possible pg!

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THE_NEW_MELISSA 4/30/2012 9:45AM

    How exciting! I hope you get a positive result! Can't wait to hear!

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PAPER_WINGS18 4/30/2012 9:40AM

    sending good vibes your way!!! :) :) Can't wait to hear about it. Either way, your time will come when it is meant to be girl! :D

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MBSHAZZER 4/30/2012 9:16AM

    Susan, you're so funny! Good luck with the test and I sincerely hope that both your mom and your friend are OK. Sending lots of positive thoughts your way!

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BOOTS1221 4/30/2012 8:15AM

    Wow so much going on! I am sending good vibes to your friend & your mom. My mother in law works at Lahey, small world! I was actually wondering how the ttc was going for you, I can't wait to hear!!

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FITBECKSRN24 4/30/2012 7:34AM

    splurge and get the early response ones!! they give a definite pregnant not pregnant so there's no guessing!

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CRYSBROWN1 4/29/2012 5:33PM

    What a crazy week you had. I hope that your mom and friend on are the mend.

Exciting news about the possible pregnancy! Crossing my fingers for you!!

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Getting back to making the right choices about my snacks

Friday, April 20, 2012

This week has been my school vacation. I've been mostly at home all day. And I've been makign poor eating choices and gaining weight rapidly. :( I'm embarrassed to say this, but I'm hoping writing about it will make me snap out of it.

I really can't blame this on some sort of "set-point theory," the excuse I've been known to use for my weight ups and downs. This time though it's just simply giving in to poor choices. I have a fridge full of crisp apples and fresh oranges, and my usual "on track" plan allows me to eat as many of them as I want. However, I've been scouring the shelves for other, more nutrient-dense items, like granola bars, crackers, tortillas, cheese, and peanut butter. Each day this vacation I've woken up set to be "good"... healthy breakfast, healthy lunch, healthy early snacks, morning exercise........ and then by midafternoon I'm digging into a couple quesadillas or whatever, and then looking for more. Whatever sort of benefit I'm getting from doing this, it's not worth it. I want to turn this around right now. I want to eat the apples and the oranges (and if that's not enough, I could have any other fruit or vegetable I want!) instead of the junk that just makes me sluggish and gain weight.

Will check in and let you know how it goes...

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SLENDERELLA61 4/27/2012 9:33PM

    You can do it!! This is a brave and honest blog.I suspect most all of us on SP have been there. But I sense a strong willingness in you to make right choices.As I said, you can do it! -Marsha

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CRYSBROWN1 4/21/2012 5:47PM

    No good! I do find though that when my routine switches, much like yours with school vacation, it is hard to stay on track as you do when you go to work, pack your lunch, stick to your typical mid day snack, etc. So, perhaps once you are back you'll get right back into the swing of things also maybe you can sorta "pack" your lunch bag at home and set aside just the right things that you will eat for the day. Easier said then done but I think blogging it out is definitely helps.

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CARILOUIE 4/21/2012 9:58AM

    Blogging about my choices almost always helps me. If I get it out there, it's like admitting it to myself that something has to change. I don't watch a lot of Dr. Phil, but one thing he says sticks with me - in order to change something, you first have to acknowledge that there is a problem.

Good luck!

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SEEHOLZ 4/21/2012 8:34AM

    That's a tough one! I don't know about you, but for me, once I'm in that mind set, I'll go out and buy "junk" if I want it. The longer I abtain from that type of eating, the less the urge becomes I guess. So hopefully just getting back to regular week routine willd do the trick! And, at least you've been exercising. That helps mentally for sure :-)

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BOOTYLICIOUS83 4/20/2012 7:30PM

    i did that with lunch had two sandwhiches instead of 1 put too much mayo on AND drank a huge glass of coke felt crappy after. just do better tomorrow day by day

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SPARKNMOM 4/20/2012 6:20PM

    I go through spurts like that as well. I'm on track for a while and then bam! I eat something and it goes on for weeks...ugh!

You CAN get out of that funk though! You know how and once you are strong for a day, then the next day it's a little easier to be stronger! Check in again soon!

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KAYECAN 4/20/2012 2:23PM

    I just read a blog about food addiction and this just trails the same thought. I'm like you.... I can have healthy fruits and vegetables already cut up and washed and ready to pop in my mouth but it's not what my body's like I have to prove to myself that I can defy myself and I search for anything but what is good for me. Now I don't have much in my house that isn't healthy, but it sure is easy to come up with some interesting concoctions. It's just a battle we have to learn to win. Some days are better than others and hopefully the weak mindset will take back seat to our healthy ways more and more.
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MBSHAZZER 4/20/2012 11:06AM

    Is it helpful to just not have the stuff in the house? Or is it one of those situations where Jess can eat whatever he wants and doesn't want to eat "your" food?

Larry does the grocery shopping for us and I usually put stuff away. But I do ask him to put away things like chips and snacks before I get home so I don't know where they are. Actually, I do know where they are, but they are on a shelf that is too high for me to reach, so I am SOL!

Good luck!

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My Activity Feed - Who Knew?

Monday, April 16, 2012

Yes I'm writing a blog at 11 P.M.! It's my week off! I can write a blog whenever I want :)

I can't believe I never noticed this before, and you all probably already know this...but when you click on "FEED" at the top of your Spark page you see all the status updates you ever wrote on Spark...and, more interestingly, all the comments and "likes" people left in response. I had no idea anyone was commenting or "liking" my status updates at all! I went back and read them earliest one was over 700 days ago. I went to my Activity Feed settings and the button for getting an email when someone comments on my status was checked, but I've obviously never gotten any of those you guys get emails when people comment on your status? To anyone who's ever felt ignored because I didn't mention the comment, I'm sorry, and thanks everyone for the support I hadn't realized I was getting!

In other news, I had a bit of a binge today - very naughty. Then I met my hubs in the city and we walked around to enjoy the gorgeous weather. We crossed the Boston Marathon finish line! Hehe - just for fun. The marathon was over and the crews were cleaning up. My feet hurt - I don't know of any sandals that are cute and comfortable to wear to walk 4 miles or so around the city. We had dinner at a fancy place we had a Groupon for but I was still stuffed from my binge so we shared an appetizer (polenta) and a dish (chicken and mushrooms with risotto)...Jess had a beer and I'm not drinking alcohol these days, just in case. ;) Then we got dessert...his idea but I loved the idea...but it was a chocolate cake with mousse which he doesn't really guess who ate the whole thing minus one bite...yup. Sooo stuffed. The scale will punish me in the morning. Oh well. Between my run and my walk today I did 8 miles. Plus I crossed the finish line of the Boston Marathon and hey, isn't that at least a 2,000 calorie burn right there?:)

PS - whenever I go into the city proper I feel so dowdy. Who are all these incredibly stylish city girls?! Why can't I look like that?

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

FITGIRL15 4/18/2012 11:55AM

    I HATE notifications! I have turned almost everything off, except blog/picture comments. I am on Spark on a daily basis nd check my Feed often, so no need to notify me to look at it! LOL
I'm glad you are now aware that it is there though!!! I agree, the Feed is cool!

When I think of a "dowdy" woman, I think of Elaine from Seinfeld... you look nothing like her! LOL

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LIL_EZZY 4/18/2012 8:16AM

    Never gotten the emails but I did come across the feed button. I always like you.

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SILLIANGEL 4/17/2012 10:25PM

    I have always gotten emails for likes and comments, but I think it's been a while since I've updated. I totally didn't even know the feed tab was there. What a trip to look at!

Also, who wants to be a stylish city girl when you can be yourself??

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SACREDECHOS 4/17/2012 3:24PM

    humph learned something new today lo ty!

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MBSHAZZER 4/17/2012 12:24PM

    The only emails I get from Spark are the blog notifications. I haven't gotten anything else in months, no matter what I do to adjust my settings. BOOOO!!!

Glad you enjoyed the nice weather. And I am totally with you on feeling generally "un-style-y" - try living in South Beach if you want to really feel dowdy! LOL!

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BOOTS1221 4/17/2012 10:02AM

    Same here girl, no emails! I realized that a few weeks back, so now every so often I check my feed to see if anyone has said anything. OH and I totally know what you mean about going into the city! When I was about to graduate college I thought I SO badly wanted a job in Boston (I live about 30 mins outside the city), but now when I drive through there and see how I would NOT fit in I'm glad it didn't work out haha!!

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KAYECAN 4/17/2012 8:50AM

    That is funny about your activity feed. I'm actually having a difficult time with my friend feed. Some people (like you for instance) don't show up on my friend feed. I don't know why some friends do and some don't. Seems all my friends should. Oh well.... probably just a glitch in the sparkware.
And congrats on crossing the Boston Marathon finish line!!! Woo Hoo!!!! I know that is bogus cheering but what the heck...... we can never have too much support!!! Enjoy your time off.
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EVIE4NOW 4/16/2012 11:26PM

  Thanks for the information. Glad you enjoyed your day.

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PAPER_WINGS18 4/16/2012 11:16PM

    LOL!! Too funny about your feed. ;-) Goofy.

Anyway, I USED to get notifications, but within the last month or so, I stopped receiving notification emails when someone comments on my statuses. :( I don't know what happened. I wrote to Spark's Help team or whatever & they basically told me to check my SPAM email folder...yeah, NOT the issues, SP!! grrr...

Dinner sounds lovely! Yum!

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