Wednesday, May 18, 2011
The other day someone commented on a blog post I wrote three years ago. I'm an old Sparker....I joined in 2006 and have been using the site in full force for the better part of the past 4.5 years. I feel like at this point I have figured out what works for me for the most part. It's been an extremely bumpy ride to get to this point, but I think I have it now. So now it just feels like I'm plugging along. There won't be much exciting healthy lifestyle news to write about, because I have a good routine now and keeping that routine going week after week does not generate much news. I go to Trader Joe's each weekend and buy my fruits and vegetables, milk and yogurt, almonds and tea, and ingredients for my batch-cooking recipes, which I then bring home to cook, separate into single-serving containers, and enter into Spark recipes to get the nutrition facts for each serving. I track my calories each day, with a lot of copying a meal from one day to another. I go to the gym or run outside almost every day, and I go to Body Pump Tuesdays, Thursdays, and once per weekend (I think I like the Sunday class better than the Saturday class at my new gym). I'm still losing very slowly, but even that will stop soon if it hasn't already, because I'm basically at a realistic, maintainable weight.
There will be a few ups and downs. This past Saturday I was not particularly careful about my eating, and even though I was physically extremely active all day I gained some weight. However, I was not in the least bit anxious about it, and I wouldn't even consider it "off track" really, because the term "off track" to me implies that I did something wrong. In a lifelong healthy lifestyle, there are going to be days like that and it's perfectly OK. I've since returned to my usual eating habits and just as I knew would happen, the temporary extra pounds have been slipping back off. (In all honesty I was a bit worried that a day of less careful eating might drag me into a spiral of unhealthiness like what has happened to me before, but I made sure to stick to my routine and just allow myself moderate extra snacks when I really needed them. There will be no more downward spirals into the doom of unhealthiness for me!)
There will be times when my routine gets disrupted or altered - like if/when we finally buy a house and/or have a baby - and when those times come I'm sure I'll need to do a lot more blogging to figure it all out. But for now things are mostly same old! That's not to say things are easy - of course there are times it sounds nice to slack off on a workout or overeat junky foods. But I keep on making good choices, beause a healthy lifestyle, for me, really is about plugging away at it week after week, never expecting sudden miracles, but knowing that the long-term effects are profound.
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Back in early 2010, when I got married, my weight hovered around 145 for a little over a month, so somehow that became my goal weight. Still not sure whether that's my permanent goal weight, but I like how I feel at that weight.
Last night I didn't get enough sleep...hubby worked really late... so this morning I was still a little fuzzy-eyed when I stepped on the scale. Keep in mind three days ago I was 152.2, two days ago 151.2, yesterday 150.2.... so when I saw that there was a 7 in the ones place I thought something was wrong. I thought it said 157.8....but then I blinked the sleep out of my eyes and realized the scale was saying 147.8!!! WHAT?! Of course I didn't believe it and got off and on a thousand times until it finally settled in at 149.2. I'll take it - I'm under 150! Closer to 100 pounds than 200 pounds! And less than five pounds away from my goal weight!
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
I didn't binge. :) In fact I'm at under 1,600 calories so far today (at 8:20 P.M.) which is quite low for me. I may have a bit more to eat tonight but I'm not really that hungry today after last night's big seder. This afternoon I watched Fat Head on zulu.com which really made me think about whether I should eat less brown rice and whole wheat pasta and more butter, meat, and coconut oil!? It even made me question whether fat-free dairy is the best idea. I don't know....there seems to be contradicting opinions about everything health-related. Either way, watching a health-related comedy-documentary was just what my spirits needed. After dinner I went for two laps (34 minutes) around Jamaica Pond and when I got home my mom had emailed pictures from last night. So here's what I look like at 154 pounds...and the dress...I wouldn't have picked it out myself, but my mom gave it to me and I thought it was kind of fun...it was just my own family afterall.
Wednesday, April 20, 2011
Ughhh...every few months it happens, no matter what I do to prevent it, it seems: The binge monster reappears. Now get me straight - I am NOT saying I binged. I'm saying that the URGE to binge has reappeared. Before this, I hadn't wanted to binge at all since the last time I got myself back on track in January 2011. I've allowed myself PLENTY of treats - some weren't really even in moderation - but I was always in the healthy mindset. I always tracked as best I could, and countered high-calorie days with exercise, and with days where I ate less, and with simply a "this is life, not a strict diet" mindset.
But then a series of events led me to this not-so-happy place. First, I haven't been feeling great. Last night was the second night in less than a week that I woke up in the middle of the night with heartburn - both times were after eating more than I should. On top of that I have PMS, and I am in a bit of a weight plateau (I said in my last blog that I don't mind that my weight's not changing, but I gotta admit that a new lower number would really rev up my spark). Also the stress of realizing that buying a house and having children are basically just not affordable for my husband and me right now really got to me, and I have spent a few days recently being really crabby toward him, which I hate because he is wonderful and doesn't deserve that.
Anyway, this week is my school vacation and today I have hours and hours of free time, which I've been spending at home, catching up on blogs and emails and stuff. And I know that there are cookies, Lindt chocolates, and honey roasted peanuts in the kitchen. So I started to get that "binge monster" feeling...like....I could just eat with abandon, not tracking, not worrying about what will happen with the scale or even with how I feel physically, using food for entertainment and short-term satisfaction with no thought about long-term consequences. This is NOT how I want to feel! WTF!
Thank goodness when I actually went to investigate those cookies (which my mother gave my husband as a birthday present - grr, shouldn't be in the house) they looked kind of stale and unappealing. If they had been at all appealing I probably WOULD have binged.
The thing that bothers me about this the most is that I have been trying SO HARD to get OUT of this mindset. I allow myself to eat plenty of treats, to lose weight slowly and even be okay with not losing at all, and I don't even have a prescribed calorie range anymore - I just eat fruits or veggies when I want extra snacks. So why am I STILL getting the "binge monster" feelings?
I am going to snap out of this without succumbing. I promise.
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