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One Step Back

Friday, October 29, 2010

(Countdown to New Yearís Ė 63 days left!)

Iíve been focussing on regaining my health since August 23, 2010, joined SparkPeople on September 9, 2010, and been undergoing radiation treatments (rads) for breast cancer in October (expect to finish around November 3). I have had the focus of a heat seeking missile, learning about nutrition and exercise, but am now unable to follow-up on the exercise because of reactions to the rads. Giving up? No way!

All this means is that Iíll take a step back and digest what these two months have brought me, let my lessons sink in, and be better prepared to continue once Iíve recovered. In the meantime, nutrition will continue, as will organizing my home. Movement will be incorporated insofar as possible, but Ďformalí exercise is on hiatus until Iíve recovered. Then Iíll reward myself with an aquafit class!

I was planning on Aquafit in January 2011, but my doctors say I can do it four weeks after I finish rads (assuming my skin heals properly). That brings me to end November/early December. I see no reason to delay it Ė itís four more weeks of exercise challenge! It will give me a good re-boot before I return to work in January.

Iím so looking forward to all of this. I am re-energized, and Iíve taken conscious, deliberate control of my life for the first time. Feels great!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUSTYNA7 10/30/2010 7:53PM

    I love that the countdown will get you beyond the treatments and into the next phase of your recovery/rejuvination. You are doing a great job of listening to your body and keeping positive. I love working out in the water. Right now I am trying to work on my singing at the same time and it sounds like an angel singing sometimes with me.

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MSPRIS3 10/29/2010 11:49AM

    Congrats on getting this far, and committing to continue when you are fully recovered.

Aquafit - this is on my to do as well!

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KELPIE57 10/29/2010 11:01AM

    Well done on your commitment, however do what your body says you can, not your mind! emoticon

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AMOHAME2 10/29/2010 9:24AM

    It's so great that you are almost done with your rad treatment!!! It's absolutely best to give your body the rest it needs to recover, and in the mean time if you continue eating right, you're going to do great...weightloss is about 80% nutrition related anyway. I can tell you are really excited about starting with Aquafit, which I think means you are going to really commit to it enjoy it! emoticon

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A Model Monday

Monday, October 25, 2010

(New Year's Countdown - Day 67)

Today was a model for the rest of my week, as I near completing my radiation treatments.

Fatigue is assailing me to a degree I never expected. I got up, ate, and fell asleep on the sofa this morning. I was so soundly asleep then when my ride arrived, and rang the doorbell three times, I didnít even wake up. Luckily he called, and the phone woke me. But that just means that I need the extra sleep, and Iím allowing myself to take it. Itís the only way Iíll heal properly.

Of course, that meant I had no lunch before going to the hospital. I had to eat in the infamously unhealthy cafeteria. After doing the cafeteria circuit twice, I noticed someone refilling the salad bar. So guess what I had for lunch!

After that, went to my doctorís appointment, then my rads, then a walking circuit of the hospital campus, just to get some steps in. I found a circuit is about 600 steps, and decided to do one before and one after my rads this week.

Now, because I slept all morning and was away all afternoon, I made no preparations for supper. Normally, that would lead to take out. But today, I managed to organize something from food we already had at home, so we had a nice healthy supper. After that, we did a couple of errands, and I finished sorting my closet at home (from which I removed most of my dressier clothing, which has all gotten too big!)

So this is the model I want to follow this week: rest as required, eat nutritiously, add walking wherever I can, and get stuff done at home. Things are still falling nicely into place.

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

KELPIE57 10/27/2010 3:01AM

    Well done for not lettingthings overtake you, and above all, take care of yourself!

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JUSTYNA7 10/25/2010 11:41PM

    We have choices, always. I am very proud of yours today!

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BELLALUCIA 10/25/2010 11:32PM

    You're in my prayers dear!

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Forced to go hunting for treasure

Friday, October 22, 2010

(New Year's Countdown: Day 70)

I blogged a couple of days ago about the treasure trove I found in my basement - clothes that I had saved for when I'd lose weight, and now they fit. Mostly tops and winter coats. This week-end will definitely entail continued hunting for treasure, either in the basement or at the consignment store. I'll tell you why...

This week I attended a "Fitness After Cancer" workshop, which included some stretching and aerobics activity. Here I am in my nice matching jogging outfit, feeling good and not frumpy. It's the only nice outfit I have for exercise.

Then I start feeling a little uncomfortable. A feeling of pants sliding down.

Yep, the pants are too big and were sliding down over my hips. I had to do the movements while holding my pants up. These things don't happen when you're on a stationary bike!

This steady stream of too-big clothes this week is really such a revelation to me. I've been so focussed on my radiation treaments (18/25 done today!) and learning about nutrition and trying out exercises that will work for me. I hadn't really processed that it was all working, and that I'm firming up and losing weight.

Can I get a Woo Hoo? And a giggle too, cause c'mon - that was funny!

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

JUSTYNA7 10/25/2010 11:50AM

    emoticon They don't have a giggle icon but I'm giggling. See, even baby steps are good! Fabulous news!

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MSPRIS3 10/25/2010 9:15AM

    Woo Freakin' Hoo

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LAURITA. 10/24/2010 12:16AM

    I think you've really done very well. I couldn't find the energy to get much exercise when I was going through treatments. Radiation had me unable to get through the day without my afternoon nap.

Way to go!!!
Funny, visualizing you trying to exercise while holding up pants, hehehe

Who needs to go shopping, lol.....just go to the basement! emoticon

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JOCALAT 10/23/2010 11:39AM

    Yes it was funny and I had similar experience with my pj bottoms....glad to hear you are almost at the end of rads!!! emoticon

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    emoticon emoticon

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LOOSEINGIT 10/22/2010 8:19PM

A BIG WOOHOO for you.

I use to carry saftey pins with me just in case my workout pants decided to have a mind of there own.

Happy Hunting,

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DBAILEY0438 10/22/2010 7:20PM

    im glad that you find the strength to keep up with your workout cause i know how those treatment can tire you out keep up the good work

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Letting Go

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Today: Radiation therapy 16/25 ; Day 72 in the New Year Countdown

Iíve been working on my vision board lately, and have concluded that I forgot myself somewhere along the way. I am reaching a more serene place, where I lived when I was single, and know that my DH will be more comfortable there as well. Heís never been a Ďhigh needsí type of person. Thatís all on me LOL!

I want my life to reflect my personal values more clearly. Care for others begins with care of me (good nutrition, exercise, rest, etc.) and encouraging the same for others. Care and nurture of the environment: re-use and recycle rather than buying new Ė clothes, furniture, etc. The strength of community: encouraging community resources (library, farmerís markets, common transportation, etc.) over individualized (buying books, shopping at chain stores because itís easier, using a car for everything, etc.) Volunteering: donating time, experience and skills (and money when possible). Living my spirituality daily through prayer, meditation, awareness and appreciation.

I never expected to get married, and I think I never really consciously adapted to it. I somehow got caught up in cluttering my mind and my house with some sort of image of what marriage is, and what a home is. Iím looking hard through the eyes of ďwant versus needĒ. I am realizing that I felt some type of security with things around me, that I had images of a house filled with collections and books and things. This has become less true over the years, to the point that I now view it as clutter. Itís taking up space that we have to pay for, and we feel crowded in our own home. Maintaining and keeping things clean eats up our time. I want to strip it all down to a minimum, so that when our DS leaves the nest (heís in his last year of high school, and is already discussing sharing apartments with his buddies when he goes to college) we have relatively little. We may even move to a more central location and get rid of the car altogether.

Iím feeling lighter, and Iím feeling that thereís more light.
emoticon emoticon emoticon

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

SEAWAVE 10/21/2010 5:59AM

    Justyna wrote: "...I was rather cross that it was a global response to aging rather than a personal enlightening."

I wonder if this isn't just semantics. It's the experiences we go through, and taking the time to reflect on them, that brings personal personal enlightenment. I don't think it's a given with age if the person doesn't do their own personal reflection, but it's also not something a teenager, for example, will attain. Any thoughts?

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KELPIE57 10/20/2010 1:19PM

    sounds like a real plan to me! emoticon

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JUSTYNA7 10/20/2010 10:11AM

    I wonder if this is a common thing that happens to pre-empty nesters. I have gone through the same... almost word for word except that my relationship with DH is more a symbiosis now. Simplicity. Values. Me time.

I have a wonderful friend and I told her I just don't care about my kids so much. My life for years was all about them and the whole rythm of our days was metered on their schedules and need. I said I didn't want to help them any more. She laughed and told me it was menopause. When you are little you are self centered because you need to grow and learn about yourself. When you reach a certain point in your life you need to look after yourself again. It makes sence but I was rather cross that it was a global response to aging rather than a personal enlightening.

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Treasure Trove in my Basement!

Saturday, October 16, 2010

My DH and I were in the basement pulling out our winter clothes, and I found a treasure trove of clothing that I now fit in. I guess Iíve lost at least one size since starting this return to health, and hadnít really noticed!

Among other things I found squirrelled away in our catacombs:
ē An ultrasuede sleeveless dress and long jacket to go with it
ē Two ultrasuede shirts Ė one black and one Christmas red
ē A few other long-sleeved shirts
ē A winter coat
ē A dressy vest, and a casual quilted vest (which I can use to cover a multitude of sins in my older clothing)

That is going to save me a lot of money, as I was afraid I would be buying an entire winter wardrobe. Between the July mastectomy and the weight loss since late August, I didnít know how anything would fit! My sister is coming over tomorrow, and sheíll be taking away some of my now oversized (for me) clothes, so bonus decluttering going on as well.

The cherry on top of my sundae includes amending one of my goals (yet again), namely:
ē Review Total Commitment binder every day
This binder is basically my vision board, and it holds pictures, poems, inspiring blogs... the usual stuff. Well, another thing we found in the basement is a huge 3X6 foot magnetic whiteboard. My husband is putting it up as I type, and Iíll have an actual Vision Board that I can play around with to my heartís content. Iím pretty visual, and I canít express how happy this makes me. It will be right by the stationary bike. What better way to start an exercise session than to meditate on my goals, and what better inspiration when I start wearing down at the end of the cardio program!

I am definitely dancing a happy dance today!

(PS: New Yearís Countdown: 76 days left!)

  Member Comments About This Blog Post:

RUBYTWOSDAY 10/19/2010 5:24PM

    Isn't great when you find some clothes that weren't fitting but you didn't have the heart to give away! Keep heading towards that goal.

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JUSTYNA7 10/17/2010 3:51PM

    Oooooh! Ever had magnetic poetry? Lady bugs? Mmm. I like this idea of the giant board.

Super treasure finds. I have tossed most of my clothes and am managing with a minimum of outfits but there is nothing for winter at all. I hope to putter around at the salvation army or the consignment store and see if I can find a couple of things. I do all the budgeting and when I told my DH that I will need $1000 for joining the chorus and probably another $2000 or more next year to finance a trip etc. for competitions and stage shows he just nodded and said he thought that was fine. Sheishk! We have trips to pay for at Christmas (going to BC) and some other house expenses coming up and he has NO IDEA. Sigh. I will figure it all out. At least I don't work outside my home and can get away with summery clothes when I am serving food because when the pool doors are open it gets warm in my kitchen.

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KELPIE57 10/17/2010 1:06AM

    Great progress! emoticon emoticon

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MRSFARRA 10/16/2010 2:53PM

    Way to go, I love to shop on my basement. Glad to see another way to make your visual motivation easy and workable as you change. Keep up the great work.

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